Silence.
It was something surprisingly loud for something so soundless. Like an endless scream that echoed through the empty corridors and filled up every gap in the large house we inhabited. The silence became deafening almost as if there was a higher sound frequency clawing at my ears. Music didn't help. It only succeed in making this bare house seem emptier. Only Sebastian and I wandered these halls and only I used the time to try and feel at home. It was an impossibility of course; it wasn't the Phantomhive estate and it never would be.
I found that it was cold at night. It was all in my head really, as a demon I was no longer effected by the sensation of hot and cold. Neither really bothered me anymore but...the cold half of my bed did bother me much more than I care to admit. I never sleep on the right side of the bed and I wished I had someone willing to fill it up, to lie with me if only for a short while. Like a child, I wanted someone to hold me and, like a human, I want Sebastian to make love to me.
It hurt when Sebastian made a point to show me how little he cared. He didn't even tuck me in at night anymore and I felt so alone, so lost. He was no longer angry at me but somehow this was worse. He barely acknowledged me. He let it be known that I was little more than a nuisance to him.
It wasn't like I hadn't expected this. Sebastian had tried to kill me when I became a demon and I knew then how little I was worth to him now. Without an accessible soul to give me value, his interest in me withered and died, crumbling into tiny pieces like my heart every time he told me how much he loathed me without uttering even a single word.
Years passed and decades rolled by and my love for him remained, constantly aching in my chest with every heartbeat, with every breath I took. I lived in agony and I had little to distract myself from the pain that would forever throb in my chest.
Every now and again, I would see people we once knew; I saw Grelle at some point and William T. Spears. I frequently saw Undertaker when I wandered back to London and he laughed at me as soon as he saw me. It stung at what was left of my pride but I said nothing, not bothering to express any kind of anger or annoyance. Undertaker's laughter died down at my lack of response and he just looked at me for a while. "Oh," was all he mustered up. "hee hee..." he giggled. "We've all been there, my young lord." he poked my cheek. "it's a funny business, that of a certain little muscle beating in your chest."
I looked at him, glared actually. "What would you know of it?"
He grinned knowingly and that infuriated me but I had not the energy so I proceeded down the path, heading to the flat Sebastian and I were renting.
"You can't ignore it forever, Earl!" Undertaker called after me. "Unreturned love can kill a demon. It might take a few centuries but It'll happen."
I didn't respond, partially relieved by those words. They were the only comfort I had to hold onto now.
Once in the shabby flat I called a temporary home, I sat by the window as I usually did. Silence continued between us and I wondered if we would ever talk to each other like we used to.
Probably not.
Then we enter the 80's and we had moved into a small house on the quieter side of London.
Here also entered Amy, a young, charming woman with all the grace and stubbornness that I had once possessed and that Sebastian had found amusing. She was beautiful too, with long dark hair and those bight, green, honest eyes. I didn't even notice her beauty, her elegance and wit until Sebastian spoke to her. I watched as he approached her and began to speak to her. They were arguing about a collection of tea sets and which one was more superior.
At first, it amused me but I began to notice that he left at night. He left me defenceless and alone in the middle of the night which hurt. Curiosity had me follow him one night, watching as he made his way into a bar where he met up with...with her. I couldn't help but observe his features as he laughed with her, his face lighting up with the unusual expression. He still had slight dimples in his cheeks and his lips parted to show a bit of his flawlessly white teeth. Amy put her hand on Sebastian's as she laughed, the action struck me in the chest when Sebastian didn't pull away. Demonic rage filled me and I left quickly, silently.
There were five murders that night; each victim seemingly attached by a beast with sharp fangs and claws, their throats torn out.
Ok so I'm not the best updater or whatever but I'm not in the mood for anything particularly long.
I'm gonna sleep nowzzzzzzzzzzzzz
