I do not own anything relating to either the Teen Titans or the song "Here I Am."

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Morning at Titan's Tower, a bright sunny October day, the air was crisp, melding the last warm days of summer with the promise of winter on its way. A day to feel alive.

Victor Stone, leader of the new Titans, was sitting at the communications console. Older, wiser, he mentored his young charges in their task of fighting crime. He had learned from the best, Dick Grayson, Robin. He had fought, lived with legendary heroes, friends. Even though they had separated, as youths do with age, he would still respond to their call, their distress.

He was the only one of the original five left. All of the others had departed. Starfire had gone back home to Tameran. Dick was now Nightwing and working out of Bludhaven, Raven was…, well, Raven was. Terra, as far as he knew was either stone or, if Gar was to be believed, alive but ignorant of her time with the Titans. And Gar…

Poor Gar.

His best friend.

He thought of him on occasion, as you think of those in the past. A wistful, nostalgic memory, in Gar's case, tinged with sadness. Poor guy, how he had completely fallen apart. Vic didn't really understand why, only that it had happened.

Why was he thinking of Gar? Vic realized he was his best friend, but still, he hadn't thought of him for weeks. The demands of the new Titans, the training, the battles, had consumed his time. Guilt began to seep into his mind. He should have paid more attention. He should have visited him.

"And what about Ravager? Static Shock? Wonder Girl?" he thought. "How could you leave them to face….whatever? No, you have your duties. And Gar is no longer at the top of them." Vic let out a sad sigh at the thought. How had it come to this? He wondered.

In the middle of his contemplation, the phone rang. He punched a button on his arm.

"Titan's Tower, Cyborg speaking."

"Mr. Stone," a pause, "this is Victor Stone, correct?"

A hesitant pause, it had been a while since he acknowledged that name, "Yes, I'm Victor Stone."

You could hear the expulsion of breath on the other end of the conversation. "Thank God. I only had this one number to contact. I'm Dr. Phillip Mackensie, I'm Garfield Logan's therapist."

A chill went down Cyborg's spine. "What's wrong?"

"Mr. Stone,"

"Vic"

"Vic, Garfield has disappeared. He left a message with my answering service the day before yesterday, in the evening. He sounded like he was in trouble. I called the rehab center and he never returned from his job on Tuesday."

"Two days ago? Didn't they send out any sort of call, notice that he was missing."

"I just got back from a vacation, camping, so I didn't get the message that he had called. As for the rehab center," he paused for a moment, then as he resumed you could hear the disgust in his voice. "Fell through the cracks. I swear the people and the incidents that fall through the cracks are big enough to fill the Grand Canyon. Anyway, I called the animal shelter he works for this morning; he didn't show up for work today."

"Damn, that's not good, is it?"

"No, it's not. I called his sponsor from AA, Frank. He said he hadn't seen him since their meeting last week. You were my last hope. From your conversation, you obviously haven't seen him. We need to find him as soon as possible. From his message, he sounded like he was having a major relapse. That was a day and a half ago and no one has seen or heard from him. I fear for his condition."

"Isn't he ANY better?"

There was a hesitation on the other end of the line. "Yes and no. You understand that there are things I can't discuss, doctor patient confidence. I can tell you this. I've been waiting for another episode. It was only a matter of time until something triggered his memories and a relapse. That's why we had him working as much as possible, something to distract him."

"Damn! Damn, damn, damn. OK, do you have any idea what happened?"

"Not really. He left work at his regular time and began to walk back to the center. He was supposed to be back by 8 and he never arrived."

"All right, I'll gather someone and we'll investigate. We'll find Gar."

"Please hurry. You remember what happened the last time. The longer he goes unwatched, the further he'll relapse."

Cyborg remembered the last time, over a year ago. The mess, the blood….

"I'm on my way doc, I'll call the best in the business. When we're done, I'll let you know that we've found him."

"Thank you Vic." He hung up.

Under his breath, Cyborg muttered, "God willing, alive."

His thought returned to his previous subject. Well, that explained his reminiscing of Gar. Somewhere, somehow, he must have been having a premonition. Time to call in the reinforcements; he hurried to the communications board. "Hope he's around." He punched a code on the panel. "Nightwing, come in. This is Titan's Tower."

Surprisingly, the image of the former Titan leader appeared immediately on the screen. "Wow, that was fast," a surprised Cyborg muttered.

"Hey Vic, just wrapped up a case. Haven't heard from you for a while. How's it going?" The detective had a smile on his face, glad to see his friend.

The seriousness came through Cyborg's voice. "There's a problem Dick, Gar's disappeared again." Nightwing closed his eyes and the smile left his face, his 'work' face, serious, somber, focused, appeared.

"Damn, thought he was better. Last I heard, he was doing well at the animal shelter. OK, see if his communicator is still working. I'll be there within five minutes."

"When did you learn to fly?"

"I'll access the Justice League transporters and beam to the Common Room. Nightwing out." His image left the screen

Dick was better than his word. Within three minutes he was there and immediately all business. "Cy, how long ago did he disappear?"

"According to his doc, roughly two days ago."

The detective pursed his lips. "Not good, that's too much time for him to…. Well, we'll see what." He preferred not to think of the alternatives. "Anything from his communicator?"

"Maybe, I'm getting an intermittent echo bearing his signature from a location down on Market Street."

"OK, that sounds promising. Market Street is the direct route from the shelter to the rehab center he lives in. Can you get a fix on its movement?"

Cyborg worked the computers. "Tough, the communicator seems to be almost out of power. Still, doesn't seem to be moving." His fingers moved along the console. "Bad news, it doesn't seem to have changed position for a couple of days."

Nightwing let out a breath of exasperation. "You're right, that's not good. Either he's injured and immobile, or he's lost the communicator, or…" He paused, "We'll worry about that later. All right, that's where we start the investigation. You still got the T-Car?"

"My baby?" A small grin appeared on the cybernetic man's face, "can't go without my baby." The grin faded. "It's in the garage. Let's go." Racing down to the garage, the two men hopped into the T-Car and took off for the city.

"How did you find out Gar was missing?"

"His therapist called. Said he'd been away for a couple of days and Gar had left a disturbing message on the answering machine."

"How'd he sound?"

Cyborg looked at his former leader. "What do you mean, 'how'd he sound?' He sounded worried and he wanted to find Gar as soon as possible and that this was the last place he had to look."

"No, I mean, did he sound surprised?"

The metallic hero paused. "Come to think of it, no, he didn't. He even said he'd been waiting for something like this, that it was only a matter of time."

"Ah."

He let out a snort. Dick was ALWAYS like this. "OK, what do you know?"

"Know? I don't KNOW anything, but I do suspect something."

"You going to spill it?"

"Not yet. Still missing a piece." And Nightwing fell into a silence. The silence lasted for several moments, then he continued. "It does mean that the doc has the same suspicions that I do about Gar's condition."

"You just going to be cryptic, or you going to let me in on it too?" Cyborg paused this time. "I guess it's the same problem as before. Damn it, why doesn't he just get another girl? It's not that tough. Hell, he still gets fan mail here. He could at least date SOMEONE."

"Don't think it's that easy."

"He did it when we were all still together."

"Before he hit his maturity. After that, he didn't date at all."

"Huh?"

"He matured late, very late. It sometimes happens. That's why he still looked like a little kid until he was seventeen. Then he finally began to mature. That's when it changed."

"You sure?"

"Oh, it was slow, but the signs were there. He stopped telling jokes and started to become more moody."

"I thought he was just growing up. Acting his age."

"So did I, at the time. After that last episode, I began to think about it. Did a little research. Just need to answer one more question, then I know if I'm right."

"Hope you get a chance."

"Me too."

After a few more minutes, they pulled onto Market Street near where the fading signal had been. Even though he was driving, Cyborg kept looking down at his monitors, trying to pick signs of where Gar might be. "Tough trying to pick up this signal. Keeps fading out."

"Never mind. Pull over here. I know where he went."

"WHAT? How do you kno….." He saw the liquor store. "Shit, Gar, oh man."

"Yep." Nightwing let out a long discouraged breath. "Let's see if we can pick up his trail."

They parked the T-Car on the street in front of the liquor store. Although Nightwing was first out of the car, he waited on the sidewalk for Cyborg to join him before he entered the store. It was pretty empty, as many liquor stores are in the morning. This was the time to restock, order new stock, clean up. There were two employees in the store, one restocking, one behind the counter. The two heroes went up to the counter.

"Yes, can I help...Whoa, Cyborg. What brings you here? Is someone getting ready to rob the store?"

"No buddy, my friend and I are just looking for some info."

The man let out a breath. "Thank God, been robbed twice in the last six months. I know you guys are busy, but some of us regular folk could use help. Do you know what'…." His eyes opened wide. "That little punk. That's a REAL communicator. What'd he do, steal it?"

Cyborg and Nightwing looked at one another. Finally, Nightwing asked, "You have one of our communicators?" The man reached under the counter and rifled through a box. After a moment, he took out the familiar disc shaped object and handed it over.

"Look, if I had known it was hot, I would have sent it back to you. He just said it was a gift."

Cyborg looked at it. "It's Gar's. Pretty much out of juice."

Nightwing turned back to the man, "What did the guy look like? Can you remember?"

"Not easy to forget, how many green kids do you see?"

Both of the heroes let out a breath at that. "Don't worry man, it's not hot. That really did belong to him. How'd you get it? Did he drop it?"

"No, he was trying to buy some vodka, ran out of money and was a couple dollars short. Offered the communicator for the balance."

Cyborg's face looked pained at that. "HE GAVE UP HIS COMMUNICATOR FOR TWO BUCKS?"

"Cyborg, stay calm. What did Gar look like?"

"I'm guessing you don't mean green, since you seem to know him." The employee thought for a moment. "Truthfully, looked kind of sick, in some pain. Part of why I agreed to it. He seemed kind of out of it. Figured that he was going to a party with some friends to feel better. Usually kids don't buy three of the large bottles unless they're together and getting ready to party." At that, both the current and former Titan's eyes opened wide.

"Three bottles of vodka?" Cyborg said. "Damn, we'd better find him."

"Do you remember what he was wearing?" asked Nightwing.

He thought for a moment. "Not really, jeans and a jacket I guess, just like most people."

"One last question, did you see which way he went?"

The man shook his head, "Getting dark, I was focusing on the store, not following kids." He paused, "Guess you want this back then." The man held out the communicator. Cyborg took it back, reached into a compartment on his arm and withdrew a couple of dollars. "Thanks."

Cyborg was staring at the disc in his hand, oblivious. The detective replied, "You're welcome, thanks for the info." And they walked out of the store.

"He gave up his communicator, I don't believe it. I can't believe things would ever have got so bad he'd give it up. And for two bucks for booze."

"Vic, let's see if we can find him. Before the spiral begins again."

The two looked around outside the store. Cyborg asked, "Any ideas? Left, right, up?"

"Up is out. Gar hasn't flown, or changed for that matter, in years."

"He hasn't? Why wouldn't he now?"

"Two reasons, one, he wouldn't want to lose the booze. Two, it relates to his….situation."

"Sheesh, if you get any more mysterious, I'm going to put a hood and cape on you." Cyborg looked disgusted. "OK, so where'd he go?"

"He'd look for a place close, one where he wouldn't be disturbed. He needed relief and fast, so he wouldn't go far." Nightwing looked around. Cyborg as well.

The metallic man spoke up, "There's an abandoned store across the street. Would he have gone there?"

"Possibly. We'll try that in a moment. There's an alley over there. It's closer and in the dark he would have seen it more clearly. Let's try that first." The two walked over to the alley and looked down. It was filled with various receptacles and trash bins. There was garbage around in various areas as the collection was still a day away. As with most dirty places, it stunk. The two moved down the alley a few feet and looked around. Cyborg began to take readings with his sensors.

"Getting some residual heat measures. Some large, some small. Probably rats and dogs. Don't really see much of anything."

"He was here."

Victor looked up, a puzzled look on his face, "How do you know?"

"There's an empty bottle of Gordon's vodka over by that bin. The guy at the store said Gar bought three." He moved over to where the bottle, laying on its side, had obviously rolled. He looked around. "VIC, HE'S HERE!" Cyborg moved quickly to his side and looked between the two bins.

There was Garfield Logan.

In concert, the two ex-teammates moved quickly, Cyborg moved the bin aside to give Nightwing room to move closer. The former Titan leader quickly took off a glove and felt for the pulse in Gar's neck.

"He's alive, but weak. He must have been out here since he disappeared. Body's cold, he's probably suffering from hypothermia."

The green man looked terrible. His clothes were stained and dirty. His hair was oily and matted and he had two days beard growth, making him look extremely seedy. At his side was another empty bottle and one that was two-thirds empty.

"Looks like he's barely moved from this place in two days." Nightwing said, "Probably went back to drinking as soon as he woke up. Cy, help me move him out into the light."

Cyborg bent over, "Shit."

"Yeah, I know, I don't like seeing him like this either."

"No, I really mean shit. I don't think he moved even to go to the bathroom."

"Oh, yeah, he does stink." Dick let out a sigh as they moved him out of the shadows. Once in a more lit place, Nightwing began to roll up the green man's sleeves.

"What are you doing?"

The detective rolled up the other sleeve and let out a relieved breath. On both arms were various track marks, all long healed, and two cuts along the wrists. "Thank God, he hasn't gone back to shooting up. And it doesn't look like he tried to kill himself again."

Cyborg let out a deep breath as well. "It's only been two days. Did you think he would collapse THAT fast?"

"No sense in taking chances. Besides, if he was shooting up again, we'd have to take him right to the hospital to see what was in him. This way, we can just take him back to the tower and clean him up before we bring him back." Dick Grayson shook his head, "Oh Gar, I'm so sorry for what's happened to you."

He stood up. "Cy, let's get him back to the tower as soon as possible."

Victor Stone bent down and picked up his friend. "Gahh, he definitely needs a bath. And these clothes are probably going to have to be burned." They turned and made their way back to the T-Car and, placing Garfield gently in the back seat, began the trip back to Titan's Tower.

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Not too many hits, but then again, this IS rated "M", so I'm not surprised. Only one review (THANKS FORCE!); to answer his question, what happened to the others, you can see from this chapter, Vic and Dick are doing good and the others are….not around. I think I'll leave it at that for the moment.

Thank you my friends for reading.