Chapter 2

Quinn awoke with a start at the sound of her cell phone buzzing on her nightstand. In a sleepy haze, it took her a second to realize where she was. But as her hand brushed across her now substantially flatter stomach, everything came rushing back. It felt strange not to be pregnant anymore. Just as it felt strange to be back in her old bedroom.

She wasn't going to cry, she had done enough of that for one day. She doesn't even know how long she stood in the shower sobbing. She remembers the water going cold, and her legs beginning to feel like jelly. She remembers drying off, running a comb through her wet, tangled hair, putting on some old sweat pants and a t-shirt she must have left behind when she moved out. And absently wondering when Mercedes would be bringing her belongings over. And somehow she had made it to her bed. Sleep seemed like the only escape. The only way she could temporarily forget everything. And it was easier to forget.

Her cell phone buzzed again. Quinn reached for it and looked at the display, to find that she had two new messages, both from Puck. How r u feeling, the first one read. And the second asked, Want me to come over? Quinn couldn't help but smile. In this dark cave of pain and emptiness she felt she was trapped in, Puck was Quinn's only light. Her only reason to smile and hope and believe that maybe some day, she'd be okay-for real. She began to type a reply. You're in school, remember? ;) And i'm fine. Tired and sore, but ok.

A moment later she got a response. So? School is for suckers, remember? Fine, i'm coming over later. And i'm bringing ice cream. Quinn smiled. She remembered the countless nights she had woken up at his house with an intense craving, usually for ice cream, and Puck grumbling as he pulled on his sweatpants and headed out the door. It almost felt like old times. Almost... Quinn felt the tears welling up again. The sadness seemed to hit her in waves. She either felt every emotion all at once, or nothing at all. And she hated the lack of control.

Hugging her little lamb stuffed animal to her chest for comfort, Quinn slid back down under the covers. It was better not to feel anything at all, she decided. She was pretty sure that if she could, she would sleep forever. But it didn't come as easily this time. She tried to comfort herself with the knowledge that Puck would be over later, but even that didn't seem to help. Deep down Quinn knew he loved her, but there was this constant doubt that she was always trying to suppress. She was waiting for the day that he'd stop texting to check up on her. The day he'd realize that she was no longer carrying his child. That he was no longer obligated to care about her.

So she cried again, praying silently that sleep would hit her so she could stop thinking, stop feeling, stop existing for a moment. Just as her eyes were finally closing, she was startled by a knock on her bedroom door.

"Still not hungry, mom," Quinn said in sleepy frustration.

"It's Rachel Berry," came the voice from the other side of the door. "I have your assignments." Quinn glanced at the clock on her nightstand, finding to her surprise that it was just after 3:00. She sighed in frustration. The last thing she wanted was for Rachel to see her like this.

"Come in," Quinn said hesitantly, figuring she didn't have much of a choice. She heard the door open, and saw Rachel step inside slowly, clutching a few of Quinn's text books against her chest. She was smiling brightly as usual.

"Your mother said I could go right up." Rachel's smile started to fade slightly as her eyes fell upon Quinn, now sitting up in her bed. It was obvious she had been crying. Rachel couldn't help but pity the poor girl, no matter what she'd done to her in the past. A fleeting wave of jealousy hit Rachel as she noticed that even with no make-up on, eyes red, hair askew, Quinn still managed to look pretty. She wasn't jealous of her situation though, of course. Rachel stood in awkward silence, not sure what to say.

"You can put the books there," Quinn said, motioning toward the desk against the wall closest to Rachel. Rachel did as she was told. "Thanks for bringing them."

"No problem," Rachel said, offering Quinn a small smile. She stood awkwardly near the foot of Quinn's bed. "H-how are you feeling?" she asked cautiously.

"I'm okay," Quinn said with a slight shrug of her shoulders.

"We miss you at school," Rachel said, almost shyly. "And Glee club. We're working on a special number for Mr. Shue. A 'thank you' for everything he's done for us this year." Quinn watched the brunette's face fall just slightly. Puck had told her in the hospital that they lost Regionals to Vocal Adrenaline, which she knew meant that Glee club was over. Rachel looked sad, and Quinn couldn't blame her. She knew that Glee meant the world to the girl. She wondered if Rachel, or anyone for that matter, knew how much it meant to her.

"Sounds great," Quinn said, trying her best to sound enthusiastic. "I'll be back in a couple days."

"Good," Rachel said sincerely. After a few moments, she turned toward the door. "I should probably go, let you rest." She took a few paces toward the door, then stopped. "Quinn?" she said, turning back to face the blonde.

"Yeah?" Quinn said raising an eyebrow. Rachel looked nervous.

"I.. I just wanted to tell you that..." she hesitated. Looking Quinn straight in the eyes, she finished with, "I think you're really brave." Quinn frowned slightly, a bit confused. Then her expression softened as she noticed Rachel was starting to get a little emotional. "What you did," she continued. "I can't even begin to imagine how difficult that must have been. How difficult it probably still is."

Quinn swallowed hard, unable to speak. She fought hard to repress the tears that were forming in her eyes. She was not about to cry in front of Rachel Berry.

Rachel looked to the floor, afraid she had been too bold. Cautiously, she continued. "On behalf of the Glee club, I just wanted to say that even though Glee is ending, we'll still be there for you." She looked up at Quinn again as she added, "All of us." A single tear fell down Quinn's cheek, and she looked away from Rachel, embarrassed. She still didn't say anything.

"I'll go now," Rachel said apologetically, feeling guilty that she had made the girl cry.

"Wait," Quinn said as Rachel reached the doorway. The brunette turned back to face her. "Thanks, Rachel," she whispered, with sincerity in her watery eyes.

"You're welcome, Quinn," Rachel replied, with a final sympathetic smile. And with that, she was gone.