To anyone who posted me a non-member review: Thank you very much for your review. I hope you enjoy this chapter.
So this is the second draft of the second chapter. Personally I think that this time around is much more in-keeping with Kai's character, but that's what I think. I got rid of a lot of his bad language and cut out a lot of his speech because Kai's more the silent type as I seem to remember. I also made Ray look less like an idiot and gave a little reason as to why the Lab is doing what it's about to do.
Disclaimer: I do not own Beyblade, nor any of its characters. Also the chapter title is courtesy of Katy Perry's song of the same name and does not belong to me.
WARNINGS: None that I can think of.
Enjoy!
Bootelicious Babes
One Of The Boys
Kai's POV
"Daichi, don't pour water on to the keyboards! It makes them explode!" Kenny shrieks with about as much dignity as a caterpillar farting.
"Tyson, don't dribble honey on the screens!" scolds Hilary with more aggravation than a pregnant hyena.
"Max, stop trying to play on the games!" Hiro sighs with much annoyance as Max beats him for the third time on virtual chess.
To sum up a day with the Bladebreakers would be like a poet trying to compare a rubbish tip to a field of flowers.
Physically impossible.
And who is the captain of this brainless idiotic team that just so happens to be the best beyblading team in the world?
That would be me, Kai Hiwatari.
The sight of my team is supposed to fill me up with an emotion formally known as joy.
Where did I go wrong?
I should have taken my grandfather's advice and gone in for world domination.
That way I could have killed all the imbeciles of the world.
Starting with Tyson.
Has anyone noticed that, despite the fact that it was I who trained Tyson in to the champion he is today, it is he who gets the attention?
I find that demoralizing, and insulting.
To think I was beaten by a boy who doesn't realise that the fact that Gustave Eiffel and the Eiffel Tower have the same name is no mere coincidence.
And that's not even starting on his eating habits.
Or his habit of shrieking every time someone on the news mentions his name.
Or when he- if I don't stop now I'll never stop.
At least Max has the sense not to go dancing out in to the street naked just because his favourite band have complimented his blading skills.
Truth be told, Max is a lot easier to handle the Tyson, purely because Max doesn't as a rule have food stains all down his top.
And, once I got across the fact that Max was never to make a move on me, I was perfectly content with him as my team-mate; right up until the point he asked me if I wanted to dye my hair blonde.
Then I got annoyed with him and threw him in the lake, along with a crocodile.
Where Daichi managed to find that crocodile I don't know, but it proved useful in the end; I don't think I've ever seen Tyson move so fast.
As I said, Max is usually a good person to get on with: loyal, kind with a lump of craziness thrown in.
According to Tyson a person has to be crazy before they can become a Bladebreaker.
Take this morning for example: I was woken up by Daichi singing the national anthem stark naked on my bed and I didn't even bat an eyelid.
Had I had my gun I would have shot Daichi in to oblivion, but unfortunately Ray saw the gun as a dangerous weapon and took it away from me.
Ray Kon. The only person on the team who actually has the sense not to drink around the computers; instead, he's pulling out the plug. Ray has a great mind when it comes to strategy and he has experience being a Team Captain; when it comes to computers, however, a blind mouse with a nervous twitch has more intelligence. Anything electronic is to be removed from Ray's hands at first opportunity; we Bladebreakers learnt that when he managed to blow up the kitchen in our first year.
Apparently he'd been trying to heat a can of beans in the microwave.
"Hey, Kai, come and check this out!" Tyson calls waving frantically "these guys have our score points for the last three years!"
"Well, of course they do, Tyson" Hilary sighs "we're are the champions of the world"
"What's this we? A hedgehog on stilts is a better blader than you are"
Daichi watches in awe as a tall standing lamp sweeps through the air like an arrow to a target. Unfortunately he was not aware that his foot was tangled within the wire at the time.
"WAHHH!" screams Daichi.
"AHHHH!" screams Tyson.
"Two for the price of one" says Hilary glibly.
Ray meanwhile has discovered what a plug does and now is searching his way through each one to discover which computer it leads to. Judging by the shrieks emitting from the next room it sounds like he's just shut down the back-up system and home computer. Too late the neko-jin tries to return the plug back to its mains entrance. A scientist marches in, screams to high heaven and leaps upon the tiger like a dog to a runaway bone.
Kenny sighs heavily "oh, Ray, we're here to learn, not destroy the entire lab"
This coming from the person turning each and every computer around so he can see the hard-drive. Quite why he feels the need to take a screwdriver and take the hard-drive out to get a better look at it is unknown to the sobbing scientist behind him.
"Sheesh, Kenny" Tyson moans from the floor where he's attempting to free himself from the lamp, the wire and Daichi "I don't know why you had to bring us to this dump. It's SO boring!"
"That's because you're not paying attention to the tour guide" Kenny lectures "if you actually listen to what he has to say you might you learn a thing or two. Right, Max?"
"Hmm?" Max turns round from where he's playing video games.
Where he found the video game or the equipment to play it is a mystery that will remain unanswered for the rest of time. No matter where he is, whether it's a lab researching the use of ball bearings or a mountainside getaway with no electricity, Max will always be found playing his video games.
"MAX!" Kenny shrieks, "you should not use their computers like that!"
"It's ok" Max assures him "I'm just using the screen, I don't need the rest of it"
He returns to his game.
One wonders what he did with the rest of the computer.
"Oh my goodness!"
One wonders no longer when Kenny locates the computer in the large fish tank used for decoration.
"Hey, Daichi" Hilary calls over to him "how tall are you?"
"What's it to you!" Daichi snarls. He's very particular about his height; he's still trying to convince us all he's taller than Tom Cruise.
"I was just wondering if I could throw you in to this fish tank"
"Uh, HELLOO, if you put me in the fish tank I won't be able to breathe!"
Hilary grins wickedly "that doesn't necessarily bother me"
"Hilary, be nice to Daichi" Tyson scolds.
"Only if you answer correctly the next two questions"
"A quiz, huh? Alright, bring it on!"
"Alright" Hilary pulls a white board towards her and begins to scrawl a question across it "what is the answer to this sum?"
Tyson looks at it.
His eyes narrow.
"I'm going to have to hurry you"
You may wonder what has happened to the tour guide in all of this. Well, if you turn to your left and look to the ceiling you will find a man clinging there. You will observe the way he weeps and screams for his long lost mother. And all this will inform you that this is what happens to those who try to educate the Bladebreakers in anything that's meant for anyone over the age of five.
All this chaos proves to me that I am right in choosing Miguel as my favourite member of the Bladebreaker team. The fact that he is no part of the Bladebreakers is exactly the point I put forward.
"There you are"
Hiro walks towards me and gives me a look of reproach; he gave me the same expression when Tyson told him I'd made him wear a pink tutu complete with blue sandals. I will make the point that Tyson's cross-dressing has nothing to do with me; if he will fall for Tala's pathetic tricks then it's none of my concern.
"Was there something you wanted, Hiro?"
"Yeah, there is" Hiro replies, "I want you to sort this rabble out"
By rabble I presume you're referring to the world champion bladers. It's amusing how Hiro regards his beloved younger brother a part of that rabble; one would assume that blood would run thicker than that. Though I will admit Tyson does not make it easy for Hiro to love him. The fool does have a habit of embarrassing Hiro.
I discover this to run in the family when I saw Tyson's grandpa walking down the street totally naked and a string of policemen behind him.
Apparently the police were trying to arrest Tyson's grandpa for indecent exposure.
But none could get near to him due the fact that the man hadn't had a bath in three weeks.
"I fail to see why I should be the one to take control of them"
"Because you're the Captain" Hiro reminds me irately "it's your duty to lead them"
"If they want to destroy this laboratory then who I am to interrupt their fun"
"Kai!"
Walking away from Hiro always brings a certain amount of satisfaction; he has been trying to like me since Tyson and I are such close friends. So far as I can tell his attempts have failed.
"Hey!" Ray turns from where he is pulling out another plug "we haven't finished the tour yet"
You might have not finished, but the tour guide has taken all he can manage; Tyson calls after me and mentions tea and biscuits like it's a gift from the Gods above. It may be the highlight of his day but I have more interest in learning the history of the blue bottle fly. As far as I'm concerned the only reason I'm here is because Ray made me. He has an ability to get what he wants when he puts forward that I can either come with them to the lab, or I can stay home with Grandpa.
The neko-jin makes a good argument when he puts his mind to it.
"Hey, Kai!" Hilary runs after me and takes my arm "Mr Dickinson paid good money for us to come here! The least you can do is stick around until the end!"
"Yeah, sour puss" Tyson grabs me from the other side "if we have to stay to the end then so do you!"
Having said that they both grin at me cheerily until I turn back and return to the room we were previously in. Leaning back against the wall I endure Tyson's speech of how they've finally got me under control for all of two seconds.
"The only reason I return to this room is because the idea of returning to Grandpa is repulsive"
"Oi, Grandpa is not repulsive!"
Matter of opinion.
"Talking of Grandpa" Tyson goes over to his brother who is talking with Ray "we should take him back a souvenir"
"Tyson, Grandpa has about as much interest in a ball bearing as you do in a mathematic equation that equals to anything bigger than a three"
"Yeah, but you know what the old guy's like. He'll start thinking we don't love him if we don't bring him back a present"
"I think he'd love us more if we gave Daichi a bath once in a while" says Hiro wrinkling his nose.
From the corner the tour guide loses his grip on the ceiling and falls to the floor.
Coffee and biscuits turned out to be a rather grand affair complete with seven different types of biscuit and four flavours of tea. Too bad Tyson and Daichi have the taste buds of starving pigs. As usual Ray managed to rectify the situation by claiming to have a love of green tea; whether he's actually ever consumed such a liquid has yet to be determined.
The maid, now reassured that her cooking isn't going to mauled, swallowed whole and dumped in a toilet later, potters about serving coffee to Hiro and I before skipping round Daichi quickly to give Max orange juice. I'll say one thing for the staff around here: they learn quickly.
"Can I get your anything more, sir?" the maid asks of Hiro.
"A large cider and a hammer?"
The cider is for Hiro. The hammer is for the top of Tyson's head before his brother has to watch him consume another tray of cucumber sandwiches.
"Hey" Ray re-enters the room after a trip to the bathroom and taps me on the shoulder "you should see this"
He takes my arm and kindly but firmly pulls me in to the corridor; gone are the days my team were so scared of me they made me ride on a separate bus.
"If this is about another marble statue that Tyson has managed to desecrate then it's Hiro's turn to foot the bill"
"No, it's not that" Ray shakes his head "although" he ads "Daichi has managed to-" he catches the look on my face "never mind. This is more important than that, and Drigger agrees with me"
Out of the team Ray is still the only one that communicates with his Bitbeast when he's not actually wielding his blade. While a few members of the team find this an unnecessary habit they all fail to see that Ray is the one most in-tuned with his inner self and body. His master of meditation has proven to aid him in matters in which others have fallen.
Of course I myself have more faith in Dranzer and my own abilities to think in a situation. I was once as impressed by Digger's connection with his master until Ray drew a picture of Drigger with sunglasses on. That took the edge off somewhat.
In Ray's defence something had been slipped in to his morning tea.
To this day Tyson swears it wasn't drugs.
He also maintains it wasn't him.
If that's the case then we'll never understand how he knew it was in the tea.
As Ray leads us down another corridor and then makes a sharp turn along a third I feel it prudent to question this; he was after all in search of the bathroom.
"I got lost," the tiger explains "this place is a maze" he points off to the left "it's just along here, second door on your right"
Following his direction I walk on ahead and chose the appropriate door, which, interestingly, has the words DO NOT ENTER plastered across from one side to the other. Ray's curiosity must have kicked in. If they'd wanted to keep him out they should have used a sign saying PLEASE ENTER AND FEEL FREE TO LEARN ALL OUR DARKEST AND MOST ILLEGAL SECRETS.
His inquisitiveness has a habit of getting him in to trouble.
The last time he went to investigate a monastery to understand the religion better. However the occupants didn't appreciate a neko-jin searching through their statues and their bible, which had not been touched for over a thousand years. Sad to say that when Ray brushed it with his fingers it faded away to dust.
As did my bank balance three minutes later when the monastery decided to press charges.
Opening the door I make an initial study of the room inside and then step in; there's shelves upon shelves of bottles all tiny in size and all labelled. Some have names on them while some are marked with equations or hieroglyphs. Ray steps in beside me and looked about the room suspiciously, before looking to me as if this explains all.
"Well?" he asks, "what do you think?"
"What I think is that I don't have enough information to make any kind of judgement. You'll have to elaborate"
"Kai, this is a science lab"
"We are visiting a laboratory"
"No, I mean one that doesn't study different techniques of blading"
"Ray, we've just spent the passed three hours listening to a man who can contradict that"
"That's only half the building" Ray sighs "you're not interested in this place, that's why you're not focussing on this" he walks in to the room and picks up one of the bottles "don't you think it's weird they have all these bottles here? Why does a laboratory that studies the workings of a beyblade need tiny bottles of liquid?"
"It's not something I understand" I concede "but it's also not something I'd question"
"Wouldn't you? Even if six of these bottles were empty?"
"Is the number six relevant?"
"Of course it is" Ray insists "there were supposed to be six of us coming today. Hiro and Hilary just tagged along for the journey, the laboratory wasn't expecting them"
"And you think that for some unknown reason the lab has decided to drug us with something?"
"I know it sounds a little farfetched"
"How many James Bond films have you watched exactly?"
"Kai, I'm being serious!"
"And I wasn't?"
"You're making fun of me"
I sigh. Normally I tend to pay attention to Ray's instincts; he's practical and smart enough to deal with most situations so when he spots trouble it's usually something to keep an eye on. Recently, however, he's been distracted. None of us know what it really is but a few times lately his judgement on a situation has been a little off key.
His opinion on how Mariah feels about him would be a fine example.
She admitted to him her undying love before returning to the White Tiger Mountains and Ray had no notion of how she felt; to the rest of us it was more obvious than an elephant in a glass room.
Even Daichi noticed it.
Since then our faith in Ray's instincts have dimmed a little; not that I think he's any less of a blader, but he seems to have softened when he used to be a lot sharper.
Now it's Ray who sighs; he replaces the bottle back on the shelf and comes back to me "maybe you're right" he admits, "I'm probably seeing things that aren't there. Guess the latest victim of the Tyson virus is me"
The Tyson Virus is an illness Hilary has named in the years she's come to know us. She retains it for moments of great stupidity made by members of the Bladebreakers that could be worthy of Tyson himself. An example of this would be the time Max asked Tyson what the time was.
The actual fact that Max asked Tyson a question and expected the correct answer show that Hilary's belief in her discovered illness are not all together unfounded.
"I just thought it was odd, that's all" the neko-jin mutters as we leave the room again.
"I'm not dismissing it"
"Huh?" Ray looks at me "so you think I might be right?"
"We're the Bladebreakers, a team that's won more championships than any other in the history of blading. We've become more famous than movie stars and rock bands and along with that fame comes a certain amount of caution needed"
"So what are you going to do?"
"Nothing, unless I have to"
It is at this point that a huge explosion rocks the entire building.
In theory we both should have been alert and all around us various scientists start freaking out and bolting from their rooms with various opinions and estimations as to what that terrible blast was. Ray and I on the other hand already know exactly what it was.
Daichi.
We don't know what he's done or how he's done it but without doubt we both know that whatever it was Daichi was most certainly involved.
"It's probably time for us to leave" says Ray ruefully.
I nod.
"I'll go round the troops up"
Finding a door that looks like it could lead to the way out I stop; Ray walks on for a few more feet and then turns round again. He hesitates for a moment and then looks back at me.
"You don't think we have anything to worry about, do you? This invitation did come out of the blue"
I say nothing. If I had an answer I would have told him and if he'd not stood there so concerned I would have had no issue with anything. But he seems to have become unsettled by what he's seen. If I ever were to answer is never known because at that point Tyson comes bursting in followed by Max, Daichi and Hilary. Hiro crashes through the door seconds after that with several mad scientists hot on his heels. They're all covered in smoke.
"We gotta go!" Tyson tells us hurriedly "Daichi just blew up half the west wing of the building"
"It's not my fault, I didn't know it would blow up like that" Daichi complains.
"You do now" Hilary replies shoving him along quickly "come on, get a move on! Before the-"
"WAIT" a scientist pops out of nowhere and points a finger at Daichi "YOU! YOU…YOU SHALL CLEAN UP WHAT YOU HAVE DONE!" he roars.
I glare "no team mate mine will be reduced to cleaning duties"
Squeak-squeak-squeak
We all turn round.
Kenny is on his hands and knees with a cloth, cleaning the floor so hard it's burning away the carpet. His maid outfit – complete with apron and little frilly hat – takes us all by surprise. But what really sets the whole scene off is the mop and bucket he's pulling around with him. It's bright pink and in the shape of a beyblade.
Now if that doesn't say everything about the Bladebreakers then nothing will.
And that's the second chapter done.
I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter and may you continue to read on.
Please leave a review.
Thanks for reading!
Kiki
Kizzes!