Tris's POV
I closed my eyes as I let him kiss me. He his hands were down by my waist and were pressing me to him hard. I wish I could say it felt like I hadn't left, but then I wouldn't be feeling this unbelievable warmth in my chest as our kiss went on. Suddenly he stopped and pulled back. My heart skipped a beat as I instinctively feared what I had feared for the last two and a half years. He wouldn't forgive me. This would break him and there would be no return to the way it was, I knew there couldn't.
"What's wrong?" I asked softly, and then I wished immediately that I hadn't said those words. I knew that there must be dozens of things wrong with this. I had left, I had left him, I had left Christina, and I had left Celeb I had left us. There was too much wrong to say.
"What isn't wrong?" he asked me, stepping back a bit, but not letting go of my hips. "Were have you been?" his eyes were full of pain as he spoke and it hurt me so bad to see him like this. In fact I could only remember see him this heartbroken once before. When he thought I was going to my death. I didn't know what to say to him. Nothing I could say was believable, even the truth wouldn't be that convincing, but anyway, I couldn't tell him the truth even if I wanted; at least not yet. I cleared my throat.
"Well I didn't die." I said meekly and to my surprise he smiled.
"No, no you didn't," he whispered "But you were gone for a long time and there was a lot of evidence to suggest that you were; such as a dead body." He said his voice cold and accusing again. I nodded.
"I can't explain that." I lied. "After I was shot by David, someone found me." I remember seeing my mother just before I blacked out. "I know that they helped saved me. If I hadn't been found then I know that I wouldn't be standing here in front of you now." I hadn't made up of everything. I had been rescued and saved from my bullet wounds, but I knew how my body had been found dead, but couldn't tell Tobias. It wasn't my whole secret to tell. I also knew that he wouldn't be able to handle the truth right now. It wasn't the time or the place to discuss it.
He pulled me in for another kiss and I let him. I ran my fingers through his hair. It was short but not as short as when he kept it Abnegation style. This time I pulled back.
"Tobias, is this, OKAY?" I asked him hesitantly. For all I knew he was married with kids. I mean I hadn't been in his life for over two years, things could have changed. Maybe he didn't want me back; maybe he was just so overwhelmed to see me he was acting irrationally. I didn't want to get my hopes up. I didn't want to pretend like nothing had happened. He looked taken aback.
"Why wouldn't it be?" he asked. I felt silly asking this after the way he reacted when he saw me, but never-the-less I had to know.
"Do you still love me?" his expression was baffled like he didn't understand. "I mean, I know my feelings have survived this long, but I haven't been here for so long-" he cut me off.
"Still love you?" he pulled me close again, "Tris I never stopped." and this time when he kissed me it didn't stop…