Old habits die hard - Chapter 2
This story is totally disregarding skins fire btw, because I think it's best for everyone that we pretend that never happened.
Any reviews, criticism or writing tip would be much appreciated. :)
All mistakes are my own, I don't own skins
Katies POV
Effy fucking Stonem. Bitch. She knew it was me coming to view the apartment, of course she did it's Effy, the all-seeing psycho. So I'm standing at her front door mouth wide open, and my head telling me to run but I physically cannot move my feet. I'm frozen and speechless. I can hear her calling me over and over again but it doesn't register in my mind. Finally I regain control of my legs, I stutter out a quick "gotta go" run down the stairs and straight out the door. I only stop running when my legs can't take me any further and every breath is hurting my lungs.
The last five years I found comfort in the fact that at least Effy would be as fucked up as me, or even more considering all the shit that had happened. My mind is swimming with thoughts of the only person I thought understood me, who I shared an honest connection with, the girl who hit me in the head with a rock. What she didn't know is that not only did she break the skin with that rock, she broke my heart. Apart from Thomas, Effy was the only person to see past the over confidence and arrogance that was teenage Katie Fitch, see never took me for face value. All the shit with Freddie and our on-going rivalry was all in my head, I created the atmosphere between us to stop myself from falling for Effy, just like everyone else. Still I had my dream of a fairy tale ending to keep me going even though I'd lost my reputation, and Emily. When I had my pregnancy scare I was excited, even if it was with Sam, our kid would have been a dwarf but I would have found my purpose in life. After the doctor explained my situation I felt I had been handed a death sentence, being a wife and mother was the only vision I had for my future. That's when it started I was cold, angry and disappointed with the world, I started to forget the consequences and live in the moment. First I smacked that bitch at the hen night I was hosting for my mum's business, effectively shutting it down. When Effy came to find me I could see the happiness radiating off her, for weeks afterwards I wondered how I ever came to be more fucked up than the nut job herself. She is the finally the friend I wanted her to be from the first time I met her, underneath all appearances I was desperate for a real friend. She made me see things in a different light, and then after her break down, after everything with Freddie and her shrink, she left. Once again I was left to fend for myself, and I couldn't cope, I started smoking heavily because it was a distraction, and it was her that taught me, and somehow that made it even more comforting.
I skipped work today, ringing my boss and feeding him some bullshit about a sickness bug. The truth being I had run into the nearest bar straight after the encounter with Effy got horribly fucked up and shagged a stranger in the toilets. Avoidance is my coping strategy, I'm running out of time to find somewhere new to live , but I can't seem to get it together enough to care. I'm lying on the sofa, staring at the ceiling and smoking a spliff, I ran out vodka about an hour ago and weed was the next best thing to remove my mind from the shitty situation I was in. Usually being high works for me, I can see why Freddie was always smoking; it allows you to distance yourself from reality without horrible repercussions. Looking at the peeling paint flaking off above me I couldn't get the meeting with Effy out of my head; spliff couldn't solve my problems today. I needed something stronger.
I knew I'd end up bumping into her, it was inevitable. All the times I have wished she was around, when she finally showed up I was scared, I didn't want anyone to see what my life had become. I never got over worrying about what people think I consumed my life people's opinion of me, in college it was my appearance, which I still spent hours on. Now it's someone finding out how depressing my life was, how the great Katie Fitch had never been strong enough to get out of a slump in her life. It was that night in a bar that Effy found me, I was sitting with a group of guys laughing and flirting, and draining their wallets for drinks. I was in the process of getting drunk enough to sleep with the least ugly of the group, when Effy slid in to the seat next to me and told the blokes, with a smile, to fuck off.
"Haven't changed much then Katie? Still got the male population at your feet?" I couldn't work out if this was Effy trying to lighten the mood, or a sly dig which everyone had come to associate with the brunette. The bitch rose up out of me before I could stop it; I was on autopilot, and didn't want to Effy to see how weak I really am. "What do you want Effy? Just fuck off back to whatever crack house you crawled out of, yeah?" Obviously Effy hadn't lost her omniscient nature over the last five years, "Definitely no change then, in more ways than one if I'm right" Shit she knows, she has seen the life I live and she is here to gloat about all the success she has had, to compare herself to me when she had more reason to be in the state I am now, and I'm the one who was mental while she was free. I finally give in and just ask her I a defeated sigh "What is it you want, Ef?". She looks at me as if she is staring through my soul, gives me the third genuine smile I'd ever seen her give in the time I have known her, and grabs my hand, pulling me off the seat and out of the bar.