Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, Akatsuki or any of the characters/concepts featured. All characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto.

Special thank you to Kathlan315 for the suggestion. Cheers, my friend! :D

'Interesting, un…'

'Of course it's fucking interesting! I'm talkin' about Jashin here, motherfucker!'

The blonde laughed heartily at his words and they continued to climb the stairs towards his apartment. It was beyond obvious that Hidan was religious, but Deidara found himself intrigued by the uncommon faith and the guy's unique personality.

He was spontaneous, funny and not the type to back down easily.

Deidara had known that from the moment Hidan had walked up to him and insisted on buying him a drink. He had declined at first but the man had persisted and as a result Deidara was now taking Hidan home with him, to talk more and get to know each other.

It was true what they said; if at first you don't succeed, try again.

The blonde also had to admit that he wasn't bad looking either. He had short slicked back silver hair and bright magenta eyes. That, along with his charming grin, had won Deidara over.

Said male stopped when they reached the top of the stairs and the door to his apartment came into view. Suddenly he felt a little uneasy.

Hidan noticed his hesitation and raised an eyebrow. He followed Deidara's gaze and blinked when he saw the younger male was staring at an apartment door, presumably his own. 'That your apartment?'

Deidara took a deep breath and nodded.

The Jashinist grinned wildly and went to go over to the door but was stopped when the blonde artist placed a slender hand on his shoulder.

Hidan gave him a weird look and Deidara gulped. 'What about my roommate, hm?'

'You mean the creepy dude with red hair? What about him?'

'Look, "creepy" is an understatement, hm. He's gonna do some weird freaky shit and-'

Hidan laughed. 'Baby, there's nothin' this bastard can throw at me that will scare me away! I've been in street fights before! Fearless is my middle name!'

Deidara cringed a little at the nickname but didn't say anything more and took out the dreaded silver key. The two walked over to the door, Hidan practically radiating confidence and grinning happily from ear to ear. The blonde sighed and placed the key in the lock, turning slowly and dragging out the moment for as long as possible.

Perhaps Hidan would be different. He wasn't a fucking pussy like all those other guys. He could handle himself and there was nothing that could possibly scare him away, right?

The door opened.

Wrong.

Both men froze at the sight before them.

Hanging on all four walls of the room were symbols. But not just any symbols.

Christian crosses.

Every single one.

Deidara stood at the door, gawking at the new décor like a fish out of water. At that exact moment he could have bitch slapped himself. The idea of having a nice evening crumbled away right in front of him. How could he have been so stupid as to actually think this would work? He was doomed. Doomed to a life of solitude with only a creepy redhead for company.

He chanced a look at Hidan out of the corner of his eye.

The other male had turned a very pale white colour. His grin had transformed into a quivering smirk which was only held in place by his desire to be strong in front of Deidara. For once the Jashinist couldn't think of anything to say and his river of curse words ran dry.

'Ah, Deidara! You've returned! I trust your night was enjoyable. You and your little friend may come in but leave your shoes by the door please. We can't have a dirty carpet now can we?'

The sickeningly sweet voice snapped Deidara out of his stupor and he turned to give the owner the dirtiest look possible. Sasori drifted over to them, smiling softly like an innocent child.

Actually, scratch that, he was smiling like one of those creepy children out of the horror movies. The kind that crawls out of a well and fucking strangles you. Deidara guessed that was as close as his roommate could get to a real smile.

Emotionless bastard.

The redhead stood in front of Hidan and Deidara, ignoring the fact that the blonde was trying to kill him using The Force. 'And what might your name be, my friend?' he asked, turning to Hidan.

The Jashinist ignored the question, walking past Sasori and into the apartment. He gazed around in fearful awe, his eyes darting everywhere and sweat beading on his forehead. 'What the f-fuck is this s-shit?' he stammered.

Deidara stared in horror and Sasori watched with mild curiosity as the zealot slowly crumpled up and melted onto the sofa. He curled up in a ball, rocking backwards and forwards and muttering to himself like a madman.

It was like a vampire being forced into a meadow in broad daylight.

Deidara was surprised he hadn't burst into flames.

Sasori raised a slim eyebrow. 'Oh dear. How sad. It appears he's broken.'

Deidara turned and glared at him. 'You don't say? Look at him! You've fucking damaged him, un!' he spat, pointing at the silver-haired mess that was curled up on the cushions.

'Me?'

'Yes you, you fucking weirdo!'

'Tut tut. You shouldn't use that language Deidara. It isn't proper,' announced Sasori, walking over and sitting down next to the emotionally deranged ball of Jashinist on the sofa.

Hidan flinched when Sasori placed an arm around him in a comforting gesture. 'Are you alright? Can I help you? You shouldn't be suffering like this.'

'The fuck…is wrong…with you?' whispered Hidan, twitching.

'Didn't you hear what I told Deidara? You shouldn't use that language, it's bad.'

'…Huh?'

Sasori pulled the male into a hug and whispered softly. 'It's alright. I forgive you. Forgiveness is important.'

Hidan pushed the redhead off him and hissed, 'You're fucking messed up! Get the hell away from me!'

'…Would you like some milk and cookies?'

'Right! That's it! I'm fucking outta here!' yelled Hidan, standing up and making a dash for the door only to be followed by a confused Sasori.

'But I thought we could pray together and I was going to make some hot chocolate and-'

'Don't touch me, heathen!' screeched the Jashinist, pushing past Deidara and running out of the apartment as fast as his legs could carry him.

Sasori watched him go, a hurt look on his face. He sighed a shook his head, walking back inside the apartment and shutting the door. He turned to see a pissed off Deidara glaring at him.

Sasori blinked. 'Pity. He seemed nice-'

'He was fucking awesome, un!' cried Deidara, gripping him long golden tresses in frustration, 'he was the best one yet, un! And you scared him away! When the hell did you decide to become Christian, hm?!'

'You don't like it? I fancied a change for the better.'

'Really, un? Now? You are such a fucking asshole! I swear I'm gonna wring your scrawny little neck and-'

'Temper, temper. Unconditional love, brat-'

'Bullshit! This morning you were threatening to kill me in my sleep 'cause I hid the fucking remote, hm!'

Sasori simply smiled at his roommate. It was the kind of smug smile that your little brother or sister has when they have successfully beaten you in an argument. Then he said something that made Deidara want to pull his gorgeous long hair out strand by strand.

'It isn't my fault all the shows you watch are shit.'

I would like to give my thanks to ninjarism3 for being an amazing help! :D

So…who should the next victim- I mean, potential boyfriend for Deidara be? It can be any guy, Akatsuki or not. ;)

Hugs to those who leave reviews; it is much appreciated, but no flames please. :)