As you may or may not know, I am playing with two pairings here: Sirius/Remus, and Sirius/Severus. Which do you prefer, I ask? If people don't like the Sirius/Severus, I won't do too much, but if you think that it will be … interesting … tell me and I shall deliver. Enjoy.

Chapter 2

As Sirius made his way down the aisle between the Gryffindor and Hupplepuff tables, he could hear James and Lily's hastened footsteps behind him.

"Padfoot," James said in a hushed voice when he caught up to him, "What – was – that?!" He was looked at Sirius as though he had never seen him before.

Lily tutted at James. "I don't see what you're so fussed about." She grinned. "I think Sirius has done a bit of growing up," she sang.

Sirius spotted Peter and Remus sitting at their usual spots at the table. There were empty spots around them – they were usually kept clear from other students – but instead of sitting to the wider space next to Remus, he squeezed in next to Peter. Lily and James sat on the other side of Remus, where some of Lily's friends were, as well.

As Sirius reached for the plate of toast, James turned his head to look at him.

"Yeah, so … what was that all about?"

Peter looked up, blinking watery eyes. "What was what all about?"

"Today a certain Snivellus – ouch, don't do that, Lily – crashed right into Padfoot, and he didn't so much as send sparks at him."

Peter, too, turned to look curiously at Sirius. "What d'you mean?"

"Why does it matter?" Sirius muttered, buttering his toast.

"Well, you know, it's just a bit surprising," James said sarcastically. "Seeing as how you two are always - "

"You do too!" Sirius cut in. "Well, you don't go after him now that she - " he jerked his hand so violently in the direction of Lily that Peter cowered a little, "is on your case, but I know you would. So don't bother me about it."

"Right," said James. "So it's not fun anymore now that it's just you?" He grinned. "Yeah, I can see it, mate."

"Yeah … that's right…" he decided it was best just to agree with him, as to avoid any more questions.

He didn't even really feel like talking. There was Remus, a seat away from him, and he could see him focusing an awful lot of attention on his breakfast. What a joke, he thought. I feel like a bloody idiot, why the hell did I have to do anything?

He stood up suddenly. "I have to go finish my Transfiguration essay."

James glanced at Remus. "Alright … butI thought you would've finished it last night? Why don't you just get Moony to help you, if you're having such a problem with it."

"Don't bother," Sirius muttered, and left the Great Hall. He didn't want to be reminded of last night.

It was true, he had finished his essay yesterday. But he hadn't felt so uncomfortable at the breakfast table since Severus slipped a sickening potion in his juice, and it wasn't a memory he savored. Back in the entrance hall, he wondered whether he should go back to the common room – but no, he would rather walk, he decided, so he quietly exited out the front doors.

The morning spring hair nipped at his cheeks. He pulled his robes closer around him, books still under his arm. Remus was one of his best friends … for years they had ran together during Full Moon, their mismatched pack of animals. How long had he wanted this? It seemed so complicated … a web of constant confusion. He stared into the clear sky, wishing the answer would come to him. Yes … for the past year, he had been so entranced with Remus, but it had been so sudden.

Why did you have to screw this up? He thought furiously. You could've just … just ignored it, just controlled yourself, but no, like an idiot…

How the hell was he going to fix this now? Tell him, sorry, mate, don't know what came over me, let's just pretend it never happened? Tough chance. Things like that… you couldn't just forget them.

He was shaken out of his thoughts by the sound of something moving in the bushes. Sirius stared at them, a brow raised.

Suddenly, a figure appeared out of them, clutching a varied mixture of weeds in his hands. He turned around, a looked of satisfaction on his face, which quickly vanished when his eyes met Sirius. Dropping the plants, Severus glanced around quickly, as though searching for an escape route. When he spoke, his voice was shaking.

"Wh – what do you want?" his hand was moving to the back of his robes, indefinitely for his wand.

"Nothing," Sirius said carelessly. "Don't flatter yourself."

Severus scowled. "Where's stupid Potter? Can't even come out and - "

"You shut up!" Sirius snarled. "I don't want to hear any of your rubbish." He turned on his heel, ready to walk back to the castle.

"Not so brave without stupid Potter," Severus hissed. "Or that Lupin monst - "

Sirius turned back around to face him, a very ugly look on his face. He was at Severus's throat in an instant, wand point at the base of his neck. "Don't … monster…"

His breath was shallow; the frustration was seeping from him now. Remus … why did it have to be Remus…

The longer he stared at him, the longer the thoughts of Remus moved through his mind … he could smell the potion fumes in Severus, nothing like the clean, warm smell of Remus. But still … it could be just as good… he wished that Remus wasn't so afraid…

So quickly, his lips were on the Slytherins. Severus struggled for a moment, but Sirius was stronger – if only it was Remus, he thought, then this would be perfect.

He could hear footsteps, and he pulled away from his prey. Turning around, his stomach twisted horribly – Remus stood there, his eyes wide, lips parted slightly. His eyes fell from Sirius's to Severus's, and his shoulders seemed to fall a little under his robes. He turned slowly away, and Sirius felt disgusted with himself. How could he have done this… how could he have thought that kissing Severus would have made everything feel better?

Sirius could not bring himself to run after Remus. Not after this – what a disgrace he was, to Gryffindors, to his friends. Like a Slytherin could have replaced Remus…

He looked down at Severus, whose dark hair was falling into his face as he stared at the ground. Severus looked up at him, and a very different expression was in his eyes. Not angry, or shocked… they seemed softer, sadder…

Heart pounding, Sirius turned from the Slytherin, and ran back to the castle.