A/N: Okay, I've seen some of the reviews, and I just have to say—I know that vampires don't eat and drink or sleep. Okay? I know that. If you read that first part correctly, you'll realize Bella said she was TRYING to sleep. She did not actually succeed. I don't want to reveal anything, so I'm not going to explain anything more, but if you keep on reading, you'll find out why Bella was trying to sleep. But now on with the story...

On the second day of school back from summer vacation, I got up off the couch, had a shower, and got dressed.

Of course I didn't want to. Why should I when everything else was so... messed up? When nothing in my life was going right, why should I have to add to it by trying to endure biology?

But I knew it was that or do number seven on The List: Read the Dictionary.

So I went.

Alice gave me a ride.

"Are you feeling better?" she asked me as we zoomed down the road. "What happened to you yesterday. Was it—" She cut herself off and looked out the window. "I meant—"

"Yeah," I said, turning the volume on the radio down a notch. "It was that."

"Ah." She nodded slowly once. "Bella... this may sound harsh, coming from me, but that was three months ago. It's over now. It's time to... to realize that he's..." She took a breath. "Gone."

"NO!" I cried a little too quickly. "I know he's gone, okay? I know! It's just that he's gone because of ME!" I poked my index finger at myself. "All that happened was my fault! If I hadn't... if I had just stayed home..."

I had to stop talking. If I opened my mouth again, I was afraid I would abruptly begin to sob.

Alice slammed on the brakes suddenly. "That was not your fault," she said firmly. "Do you hear me? It wasn't your fault, what happened."

"Yes it was!" I argued, and a rather large lump formed in my throat. "He told me to stay inside. He said it wasn't safe for me. But... but I didn't listen, Alice! I waited a few minutes, but then I snuck out and saw him fighting!"

I put my head in my hands. "So I ran up to him, to try and help him. There were just so many of them! But I didn't see the one behind me... so he pushed me out of the way and lost his concentration and then—" I hiccupped. "—and then they got him!"

"Bella—"

"And right after that I was thinking, If they get me now, I don't care, I deserve what I get, but you guys showed up then and... and..." I couldn't speak clearly anymore, and my whole body was shaking.

"If anything, Bells, it was our fault for not coming earlier."

"But he c-could have held th-them off until you guys c-came!" I shook my head hastily. "He lost concentration because they were attacking me, too! He was strong; you know what he could have done to a pack of those things!" I took in a shallow breath and slammed my fist down on the dashboard. "I just had to be so stupid!"

"You aren't stupid, Bella," she said calmly. "Any of us would have done the exact same thing." She placed a hand on my quivering arm.

I just shook my head again and didn't say anything more. After a few seconds of silence—besides the faint sound of the radio—I got a grip on my sanity. "Let's just go to school," I said firmly.

"Maybe you should take today off, too—"

"I'm fine!" I lied. "Honestly. Let's just go."

The look on Alice's face was somewhere between shock, worry, and anxiety. Finally, though, she said, "Okay. But if you need anything during the day, Bells, just come and find me, alright? I won't be far."

I nodded, and she put the gear into drive. "Then let's go."

The first half of the day I was on complete autopilot.

I walked into class, did my work, walked out to the next, not really seeing the people around me.

At lunch, I got my regular tray of food—not that I would eat anything—and went to sit down with the rest of them.

As I sat down, they gave me weird looks. Alice must have told them.

"Hey," I said to nobody in particular.

"How are you, Bella?" Jasper questioned, staring hard at me.

"Yes, are you alright?" Emmett placed his chin in his hand and his elbow on the table, looking at me thoughtfully.

Rosalie didn't say anything. She just examined an already perfect cuticle.

"Uh... I'm good." I shoved the food to the sides of my plate. It made it look like I ate something if I did this.

"Are you sure?"

Alice nudged Jasper a little; he immediately stopped talking, and just looked down at the table.

Then there was a long silence.

"Why are you all so quiet?" I asked in a low voice, even though I already knew the answer.

"No reason—" Alice started, but was interrupted by Rosalie.

"How about we just act like nothing happened from now on?" she said. "How about we just act like nothing bad happened over the summer, okay? Because these silences are getting really annoying."

"Rose!" Alice gasped.

"It's been three months!" she went on. "Three months since it's happened. And before that he was only with us for, what? Four weeks? What did we all really know about him anyways? Do any of you know what his favourite color was?" She looked at us expectantly, and, when nobody replied, she continued. "What about what he wanted to do before he turned into... us?"

There was some more silence. I was the first to speak up. "Dark, dark blue," I informed the table more than I informed them. "And—and he wanted to be a doctor."

Rosalie, clearly fed up, got up from the table, threw her food in the trash can, and walked out of the cafeteria, her high heels making clickity clackity noises all the way.

Emmett got up, too. "I should go follow her."

Alice nodded, and he walked out of the cafeteria, too.

After a few seconds, Alice said, "I'm sorry, Bella."

"I said it's fine." I pushed my food to the other side of my plate, now. "And maybe Rosalie is right. Maybe we should just... forget about him. Maybe it's best for all of us."

"You know that he wouldn't want—"

"I do know what Chris would want!" I snapped, and I saw Alice flinch a bit. It was the first time one of us had said his name since the funeral. "And I'm going to do what he would want!" I didn't bother telling Alice I wasn't talking about forgetting him—I was actually talking about The List. I just got up and began walking towards the exit, leaving my food behind.

"Bella, I didn't mean anything..." Alice was already right behind me.

"I just would like to be alone, if that's okay with you," I told her, not looking back.

"Sure." Her voice was slightly shaky as she let me walk out of the cafeteria.

I hadn't meant to be so harsh—but talking about him brought up a different side of me. I knew Rosalie was right. I had to forget him. And she was right about that other part too—we had only known him four weeks. For all I knew, his real name could have been Bob or something.

I was trying to convince myself this as I stalked down the hall, not exactly knowing where I was going. Maybe I would go read the dictionary. There was nothing left to do anyways—

My thoughts were interrupted; I could smell something.

No. Not just a something. A really, really good something. I would have taken it as a human's blood, but not even they smelt this good.

I stopped in my tracks and, seeing that nobody else was in the hallway, I sniffed the air.

Oh, wow. That was delicious.

And it was coming from the biology lab.

My feet automatically began walking in that direction. I could just go and see what smelt so good and if I lost my control, I would just leave. It never hurt to be a little curious, did it?

I made no noise as I started to run down the hall. The smell was getting closer. I could almost taste it—

No. You cannot taste anything, I said to myself. You will not taste anything. Just smell.

I had reached the biology lab, and my hand reached for the door. I pulled it away. I had to be careful. I couldn't do anything that could be dangerous in any way.

So, instead, I peeked through the small glass window near the very top of the door.

At first there was nothing there. There was just an empty classroom.

But then someone walked across, their back facing me, to one of the tables. I knew at once that this was the aroma. This person was the smell.

Well, technically, it wasn't them. It was their blood.

Whoever they were, they sat down—their back still to me—at one of the tables. They were eating their lunch. Alone. In the biology room.

My hand reached for the door knob but, once again, I pulled it back. I couldn't go in there. It was a matter of life or death. I couldn't...

I have to walk away right now, I thought. Right now before my senses suddenly take over.

And I was about to walk away. I really was.

But then his water bottle rolled off the table and onto the ground, and he bent over to pick it up.

And he saw me.

And I saw him.

The first thing I noticed was his eyes—they were a bright, bright green. Some his bronze-coloured hair was falling into one of them as he was picking up the bottle from the ground.

He could have been a vampire, too, if it wasn't for his eyes and slightly tanned skin.

Quickly, I ducked out of view of the window and forced myself to walk away.

I didn't want to see him again; he sort of reminded me of...

You Know Who.

I rubbed my temples and sighed. That was fine. Perfectly fine. I would just have to avoid him if I ever wanted to forget Chris.

And that would be easy.

Or at least that was what I thought.