Chapter 2
Careful Peeps. The Girl's Gone Rabid
By Gabriel R. Lopez
Time is subjective, it isn't one of those things that follows a dictate of law and order unless it's being observed. A moment can seem like forever, or can pass in an instant without much notice. Whatever blessing or curse that allowed Ranma to travel to Feudal Japan, was designed in such away that a time traveler could experience a week's worth of adventuring and only have a day or so pass in Kagome's realm. The trick is how one returns to that contemporary setting. In this instance, it was Inuyasha who was holding all the cards, and Ranma wasn't playing wit a full deck. Ranma awoke, seemingly lost and confused, shackled to a dog demon …this was something Ranma Saotome was totally unprepared for. And, the situation called for a swift escape. Ranma tried to claw her way out of the handcuffs before the dog demon could-
"Kagome?" Inuyasa asked in puzzled contemplation as Ranma jumped up in fear and kicked the living snot out of him, like a rat flail. "OW!OW!OW!OW!OW!OW!OW!OW!OW!OW!" and you know pretty much what happened from there. Once the drama was over with. A thoroughly confused and lightly bruised Inuysha regained what some might consider consciousness… with the large knot on top of his head, a broken pair of Kagome's pink furry handcuffs, and a foul smelling cardboard Christmas tree ornament hanging, or rather dangling, from his left ear. He knew Kagome had escaped… Unfortunately, the cardboard Christmas tree was interfering with his sense of smell so bad he may as well be walking around with a bag of potato chips over his head.
Inuyasha was certain Kagome had run off, he just wasn't sure where too. To be honest, he wasn't even certain what century to look in since Kagome was always running in some random direction like a chicken with it's head cut off. Since his nose couldn't pick up even the slightest hint of gasoline or burning fossil fuels, it was safe to assume he was still in the feudal era. Inuyasa's attention was then drawn to the sound of a blood curdling scream.
Ranma was trained by the best, and it wasn't the first time she had to get out of a pair of fuzzy handcuffs. Once Ranma had escaped she ran like a pair of old pantyhose. The minute she crawled out of the well, she tried to get her bearings. Tried being the operative word, since Ranma had no idea where she was… there were landmarks she recognized, but no cities or dwellings where they should be. Looking back to make sure she had a good lead on the dog demon, Ranma set to work tearing the sleeves off the school uniform. She(Ranma) knew Ryoga's iron cloth technique was good for something, and that something was make shift weapons on the fly. Ranma was in a state of constant movement from the moment she got out of the well and headed for the nearby forest, a forest that would hopefully camouflage her… although how well the forest would camouflage her from a demon was a question for another time. Ranma was indeed fortunate she had some experience fending off demons, ghosts, perverts, and other martial artists, so this should be a walk in the park… right?
Contrary to popular belief Ranma was a very accomplished weapons user, competent with staves and cat's paw weaponry. Using Ryoga's iron cloth technique she tied a not at the end of what remained of the tattered sleeves to make a mace, while twisting the rest of the sleeve into a shaft. Ranma had made a sturdy pair of bonbori like clubs. Granted, the mace on top of the bonbori was only as big as a soft ball, but at least Ranma didn't have to worry bout them bonking her on the head if the fabric collapsed. Ranma momentarily wondered if it would have been wiser to wait at the top of the well, so she could just bonk the demon over the head. Ranma then pictured the demon ripping though her chest with it's claws like a snake with it's fist and figured it would be best to asses the demon first. That way she could claim some unfair advantage if she lost. No, hiding in the bushes was by far the wiser course of action.
After a moment passed with no sign of the dog demon Ranma felt very proud of herself. A knock out in one punch was like discovering the holy grail of fighting . Of course, Inuyasha was pathetically weak when compared to a minotaur with crane wings and octopus tentacles…but the principal was the same. And then, she was pounced from behind with a loud meow. Reacting on instinct Ranma dropped her weapons and shrieked in terror. Clearly, months of Shampoo sneaking up from behind hadn't improved his cat sense.
Killalla-micro was happy to see Kagome, sure she smelled different, but she always smelled different when she crawled out of the well…It always took a few days for masking scent to go away, but Killalla recognized Kagome anyway. It wasn't hard really, she usually masked her scent with the same hair shampoo, and pretty much wore the same outfit. I looked to Killalla that Kagome was hiding, getting ready for a hunt. Hunting was fun, and Killalla wanted to play too. So quiet as a mouse, such a horrible thing to be compared to, Killalla snuck up from behind Kagome and pounced. Kagome did not react like she was supposed to…not that she was supposed to react any other way than to shower her with adoration, and croon about how cute she was. Killalla knew Kagome liked cats, she could smell Buyo all over her school uniform. But today, something was not right with Kagome.
From inside the well Inuyasha heard the shriek of terror and jumped out onto the outcropping of the well with the cry of "Kagome!?" as he released the Tetsaiga from it's holster. He came out of the well just in time to see a sleeveless Kagome fleeing in terror from the forest like a bat out of hell. The Tetsaiga transformed into the UBER MACHETE OF DOOM! Inuyasha was ready for battle.
Kagome's loud scream shocked Killalla. Killalla-light fell to the ground as Kagome fled the safety of the forest canopy. 'That was odd' Killalla thought to herself. 'Kagome couldn't possibly be scared of me.' Once Killalla regained her composure, she shook the dirt off, and with a quick glance to look behind her squeaked in terror when she, Killalla that is, saw something that scared the poo out of her…a fifty foot tall fox demon with the head of a chicken…literally, the bottom half of the body met at the neck, which had the torso wings, and head, the size of a small farm chicken. It was clearly a half demon, although the physics of it were mind boggling. It wasn't entirely out of the realm of possibility, after all, Shippo had turned into a chicken once or twice before. That was to say, Shippo was often assigned to scare food out of a hen house every now and then… Although , Killalla was beginning to suspect fowl play afoot with the nature of the young kit's frequent hen house visit's. With a loud bamph sound, Killalla went big cat and raced after Kagome into the clearing. The chicken-fox fast at her flaming heels.
Ranma quickly glanced over her shoulder to see if the little demon was following her. To Ranma's horrified surprise not only was the demon chasing her, but the feline minion of Satan burst from the forest into the clearing four times bigger and just as scary. Ranma ran towards the dried up well just as Inuyasha popped out of the well like a Jack in the box with a cry of "Kagome!?"
This was perfect Ranma thought to herself. Dogs like to chase cats and dogs like to chase cars. Therefore a cat the size of a car would be the perfect dog toy!!! As inuyasha ran past her, a cross eyed look of madness and glee that washed ascross Ranma's face as she imagined Inuyasha chasing the cat off. Turning around to witness the feline's ultimate defeat, or out of morbid curiosity Ranma was shocked to see that Inuyasha run past the Cat demon. The dog monkey then started hacking and slashing at the forest wall using his sword like a big machete. Ranma could swear she heard the word's "wind scar!" Ranma's shock wore off the moment the large cat's sandpaper like tongue licked the entire left side of her body. Ranma whimpered in terror as she glanced sideways… a saber-toothed grin on the purring cat's face as it nudged Ranma with its massive head.
"n-nice k-kitty." Ranma's aluriphobia was reaching the breaking point, all it would take now was one little nudge and Ranma would snap like a twig. Imagine her surprise when something the size and shape of a dead chicken fell from the sky and crash landed into her head on. Ranma was knocked to the ground with a loud whud sound.
"mew?" Ranma asked with a puzzled expression as she batted the chicken away with her paw.
To be continued…
A/N: please review. Next chapter Sango, Shippo and Miroku join the fun.