Kikyo leaned her head back against the wall, and closed her eyes, enjoying the feel of the warmth of the fire, listeing to the sound of her own heart beating again.
How long had it been, since she heard her heart beating?
She had met that man's master in the forest...
His name was Tsubaro...
The man was not as tall as the man who had met Kikyo in the forest, the strange one with the half-mask of silver and icy green eyes. His long flowing scalp lock swayed when his moved. She still didn't know his name, but his master's name was Tsubaro.
He was not that tall, and he appeared to be rather plain looking. In fact, he was bordering on chubby. Short black hair, plain eyes, plain clothing. He certainly seemed un-impressive. But if he was a Senmin, as the other man had said, it could explain much. Some of the Gods and Goddesses took vassals for different reasons, and perhaps they had their own reasons for not appearing too impressive.
Certainly she could sense the great power Tsubaro held, even if he did resemble a farmer.
"So then, this is the Priestess Kikyo." He smiled at her, kindly, "I have heard good things about you. You have done a lot of good work in your day. Such a pity, you came to this ending."
Kikyo studied him warily. He certainly had no taint of Naraku about him...but then again, if Naraku had died and then been brought back, as InuYasha had told her...who's to say what his powers were like now?
"Your servant there tells me you can...bring me back from the dead."
"That's right, Kikyo. I can. It's actually not that hard...most of the work has already been done, you see. Your soul has been returned. I just have to give you a flesh-and-blood body. It's quite easy for someone with my powers."
Kikyo forced herself to remain calm. She had learned the hard way nothing was ever easy, and nothing was free.
"What do you ask in return? I'm no fool. I know you're not just going to do this out of the goodness of your heart."
"Actually, I'm not, no. But Binzuru is."
Kikyo fell silent for a moment, then spoke.
"Binzuru? You are his Senmin?"
"I do indeed have the pleasure of calling the God of healing illnesses my master. He saw the work you have done, Kikyo, both in your...earlier life, and even now, and is pleased. That is why I am able to offer this to you."
Kikyo listened, mulling it over in her head. Certainly, she had devoted a great deal of her life to healing illnesses. Even after she had been brought back by that witch, she still often helped people in villages who came to her for healing skills.
Was it possible, then? Was this truly possible?
"If you don't mind me asking," Tsubaro said, "If you do accept this gift from my Master, what will you do?"
"Do? What do you mean?"
"Well...you used to guard the Shikon, did you not?"
"That's right."
"Only now another Priestess has it. What will you do?"
Kikyo frowned, "That girl that has it now is no Priestess. She has had no training at all."
"Really?" Tsubaro looked surprised, "And yet she seems able to do wonderful things with it! Not to mention she also has some skill in healing. Will you go and ask for it back?"
"The only reason she has any healing skill at all is because my own sister has taught her. As for the Shikon...no. I gave my life for it once, I do not want it back."
"Ah, then you will let the other Priestess have it. Perhaps that is for the best. My compatriot, the Handmaiden Izumi, tells me she is very important to a great war that is coming. Perhaps it's best if she keep it after all."
Kikyo looked at him, "I told you that girl is no Priestess! And what do you mean, war?"
"I believe you met the Handmaiden before, in the forest, on a path much like this one."
"That was her? Yes...I met her..." Kikyo remembered the meeting...the woman had carried such power with her. How thrilled Kikyo had felt, after all this time, actually meeting a Handmaiden! But...this Handmaiden knew Kagome?
"Why yes," Tsubaro nodded, "The Handmaiden Izumi has met this other Pri...er...other woman. They are quite close. Izumi tells me this other woman will play a very important role in the upcoming war. Everyone is very excited to meet her!"
Kikyo frowned, "Kagome? Important? I have trouble believing that."
"It's quite true, I tell you. Perhaps..." Tsubaro spoke quietly, "Perhaps if you had not died...you would be the one all the fuss is being made over, hmmm? You might be the one who was meeting with a true Handmaiden."
Kikyo looked away, scowling, "I care nothing for that."
"Oh? Ah well, then. So, have you decided? Would you like me to return to you the flush of life once more?"
Kikyo looked at Tsubaro, and made up her mind.
"Yes."
He smiled, "Excellent."
Now she looked at herself in the mirror, unable to believe it. She was warm. She could feel the warmth inside her. Could feel her heart beating again.
She had been hungry earlier.
She smiled at her reflection.
"Hmmmm. This is troubling news indeed."
They all sat around a small cooking fire, listening to the wind howl outside. They watched as Kaede stirred a large pot of tea, "A verbal war in the heavens. None of this bodes well."
"What I don't understand," Sango said, "Is why some of the gods want to talk to Keimetsu? He has already told them he wants nothing short of the utter destruction of everything. How can they possibly hope to reason with him?"
"I don't know," Miroku said, "Maybe they hope to barter with him in some manner. Concede some things to gain others? I, personally, have no idea what a God would place on a bargaining table."
"It's stupid, is what it is," the hanyou grumbled, "What, they're going to just give half of everything away? How the hell does that work?"
Kaede handed out some tea to those gathered. The wind assaulted the walls, the wind whislting in around small cracks, making the small fire in the center of the room shudder. Their shadows writhed against the wall as they spoke.
Kaede turned to Kagome, holding out a cup. She paused, and had to speak the young woman's name twice before Kagome came out of her reverie.
"Oh, thank you, Kaede."
"Ye are deep in thought, child."
"Sorry. Just...you know...thinking and stuff."
"Anything ye wish to share? This is not a good time for dark thoughts."
Kagome shook her head, "No, just...stuff."
She rotated the cup in her hand, swirling the tea around within, watching the pattern of light on the surface of the water.
Everything had gone from good to bad so quickly. InuYasha in her world, having his first birthday in a very long time, and then...being hunted by Jiro's cousin. Then coming here, and losing Izumi. Their guide. A friend. Now the Gods and Goddesses were arguing in the heavens.
Another hard gust of wind struck the side of the hut, and she looked up, to meet InuYasha's eyes as he watched her.
He blinked, looking back to his tea quickly, but the worried look on his face had been evident.
What will you do, if you ever find out? You've always hated anyone getting hurt because of you. But if I'm right, and Izumi died...
The door flap suddenly moved, being pushed back as Mikado walked in.
Everyone startled, not expecting it. Kaede blinked at the young woman who strode into her hut.
"Mikado!" Miroku said, "I..I mean, Lady Mi-"
The Senmin's face was pale, but angry, "If you start calling me Lady, monk, I'll drop kick you into next week."
"I..uh. Yes, well then..."
Mikado turned to Kaede, and bowed low, "Forgive my intrusion, Lady Kaede."
"I am honoured to meet ye, Handmaiden Mikado." Kaede leaned forward, bowing, "I wish I had some refreshments to offer ye, but I feel ye did not come for a social visit."
"You'd be right. Kagome, I need to talk to you outside for a minute."
Everyone blinked, and Kagome rose, "Ok."
InuYasha instinctively started to rise, and Mikado turned to him, "Get back on your butt, I didn't ask you."
He blinked, "Hey!"
Mikado held the doorflap for Kagome, and they slipped outside.
Kagome put up a hand to sheild herself from the wind, blinking when it suddenly stopped. She turned to see the wind was still blowing all around them, kicking up dirt and dust, but she seemed to be in a little clearing of about 10 feet of still, calm air.
Mikado, standing in the little shielded area, got right to the point, "I did some checking around. No one knows it yet, but...yeah. I know what happened."
Kagome swallowed. She didn't want to say it, but knew she had to.
"She...Izumi brought InuYasha back from the dead, didn't she?"
Mikado looked haggard, but nodded, "Yeah."
Kagome put a hand to her mouth, trying to keep herself in control.
"What I think happened was like this," Mikado said, in a level tone, "InuYasha tried to close the portal, and it backfired, and killed him. When Izumi got there, and saw he was dead, she...she broke the law. She brought him back. He had just been killed, his soul was probably not completely in the other world yet, so it would have been possible to do it right then and there. Izumi had been with Mother Amaterasu for so long, she had literally absorbed so much of Amaterasu's power, that she was able to just reach through the veil and yank him back, right then and there."
"But...but why did that kill her?"
"It wouldn't have. But it would have taken all her power, Kagome. When someone brings back someone from the dead, to put them in a living body again, takes a lot of power. The witch that brought Kikyo back was only able to make a body of dirt and bones for her. Even when Amaterasu herself kept Sango in check, when she brought her back, she had to put Sango right back in the same body again, which was why she came back injured. Izumi not only had to bring his soul back, but repair his broken body. The...the only way I can see her being able to do this was...was if she literally channelled all the power she had absorbed from Amaterasu into InuYasha. Every last drop."
Kagome looked back at the hut.
"He can't hear us, I'm blocking our sound."
"So...what happened with the meteor, then? Was that Izumi?"
"I...I guess so. It had to have been. There was no taint of anyone else around it. I guess the only thing she could do to close the portal was to bring that rock down. There would be enough power in it to close the portal, and destroy the island as well, making sure it couldn't ever re-open. But...Izumi had no power left to survive it. So she obliterated herself as well."
Kagome took a shaky breath.
"It's what she would do," Mikado said, looking at Kagome. She was startled to see tears in Mikado's eyes, though the woman was smiling sadly, "She really loved InuYasha, Kagome. Izumi always saw him as Izayoi and InuTashio's son, the union of their love. Although she was never allowed to raise him, she always sort of thought of him as hers too, you know. She would have done anything to raise him. I...I think if Amaterasu hadn't hidden him from her for a while, Izumi would have walked away from Amaterasu to raise him."
Kagome spoke, "He can't know, Mikado. I don't know what he'd do if he ever found out. He was just starting to think of her as an Aunt. If he ever found out he was the cause of her death..."
"Yeah, I know." Mikado took a deep breath, and let it out. She gave a weepy laugh, "I want to scream at him, so much, you know? I mean, he took Izumi from me. I've lived with that woman for over 1200 years, and now I just miss her so much. And I want to scream at him, that it was his fault. But I know...he just doesn't understand."
Kagome nodded, then spoke, "Mikado, please. Don't...don't let Sesshomaru know."
Mikado blinked at her, "Sesshomaru?"
Kagome nodded, "I think...I think he was coming to care for her. Certainly she seemed to get away with more with him than I ever would have imagined. She actually talked him out of attacking InuYasha more than once."
Mikado smiled sadly, "That doesn't surprise me. Izumi warming up The Neutral One's heart seems just the sort of thing Izumi would do without any idea. Sometimes that woman could be so blind..." she chuckled, and tears spilled over, running down her cheeks. She sniffed miserably, wiping them.
"I wish I knew where he took her, but...I'm glad she can rest now. She was getting so tired. I'll keep it from both of them, Kagome. And I'll do my best by you. I was training to take over from her after this war...now I have to do it all myself, and it's not easy."
Kagome nodded.
Mikado sighed deeply, "Well...I have to go. There's a lot of stuff I have to do. If you need me, just pray to Amaterasu. I should be able to hear you. I'm afraid I can't talk to the birds..."
"I'm sure you'll make her proud," Kagome said softly.
Mikado just nodded mutely, and with a wave of her hand, destroyed the bubble of calm air they had been standing in. The wind shrieked around them, flinging up dirt and dust. Mikado faded into the brown darkness, and Kagome turned, walking back into the hut.
Five pairs of eyes peered up at her when she walked back in. Kagome offered a wan smile, "She just wanted to talk. She's...missing Izumi."
"Yes, I suppose she is," Miroku said gently, "They've probably been together a long time."
Kagome knelt beside InuYasha again, "1200 years, Mikado said."
"A long time to know someone," Kaede said gently, "It will take some getting used to."
That night, Kagome lay staring up at the roof over her head, listening to the storm rage outside. The others were all asleep, but her mind didn't want to rest. She was worried. Losing a friend was bad, but there was another side to it. Izumi was the one who guided them. What was going to happen now? Mikado was a Senmin too, but she seemed so unsure of herself. And now all the Gods and Goddesses were arguing. But why? Surely the loss of one Senmin hadn't been that big of a deal to them?
Or did they think Keimetsu had killed her? Would that be enough to make them think they might lose?
Or maybe it was even the fact that she wasn't supposed to die. Mikado said none of the fore-ordained fates for Izumi showed her dying yet. Is that what frightened them?
She sighed.
"Kagome?" A faint whisper.
Kagome turned to see InuYasha sitting up in the furthest corner of the room, his back against a wall, arms folded, Tetsusaiga leaning in the crook of his arm, his old style of sleeping. There was a window near him, the covering rolled back slightly so he could look out. She wasn't sure what he could see with all the darkness and dust, but considering how much better his eyes were than a human's, she figured he might be able to see something.
Right now he was looking at her.
Kagome pushed back her blankets, and sat up. She peered around at the others, saw they were still deep asleep. Quietly, she rose, and walked over to him, and sat beside him.
"I wasn't sure if you were awake or not," he said, speaking softly so as not to wake the others.
"Yeah, I can't sleep. Guess you can't either."
"Mmm."
Kagome drew her legs up, hugging her knees, looking down at her bare feet, "It's actually cool tonight. Been a while."
"Are you cold?"
She gave him a slight smile, "No, I'm good."
He watched her face for a moment, then spoke, "What did Mikado talk to you about?"
"Just...this and that."
He quietly huffed, "Yeah, sure."
She blinked at him. He looked away, "You're getting to be a terrible liar, you know that?"
"Gee, and I've had so much practice."
He turned to her, blinking, startled to see her half smiling at him, trying to joke.
InuYasha failed to see the humor, "Funny."
"Sorry. It was just...you know. She wanted to talk, that's all. She's...lonely."
InuYasha turned, peering out into the darkness, "Mmm."
Silence. Kagome watched him in silence for a few minutes. She knew every line in his face, the angle of his jaw, even the shape of his nose.
I could probably draw it with my eyes closed.
"Do you want to talk about anything?"
"No."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah."
"Alright." She rocked back and forth a little on her bottom and heels, waiting. She knew it was coming, he just had to find his own way.
Silence.
A gust of wind rocked the little hut, moaning.
"I just..."
Kagome turned, looking at him.
InuYasha looked down to his lap, one hand gripping the hilt of the Tetsusaiga, hard. She suddenly noticed the sheath strap was there, tied just under the metal ring at the top, and she felt a burst of strong emotion. The red leather and small black tassle made the old sheath look a little fancier now, not like some cast-off someone had maybe thrown away.
"I keep thinking, what if I hadn't tried to close the portal myself? What if I had called Izumi right then and there? Would she still be alive?"
"There's no way of knowing that, InuYasha."
"And then there's what you said, about...maybe she knew she was going to die. That keeps coming back to me. Is that why she sent me back to you guys? So that mountain wouldn't fall on me too?"
I should have kept my mouth shut, she thought.
He looked at her, golden eyes confused...and hurt.
"Why did she do it? She knew we needed her. She's supossed to be our mentor in all this, guide us, explain things to us."
"It's not like we're abandoned, InuYasha. Mikado is still here."
InuYasha laid the Tetsusaiga across his lap, looking down at it, "Yeah, but...why did she do it? She knew ...we needed her. She...she was..."
"She was a friend, InuYasha," Kagome finished for him, "Not just a guide, but a friend."
He snorted, but it was weak.
Kagome gently spoke again, "You're allowed to miss her, you know. You only knew her a little while, but she was almost family to you. Considering all that she told you, she was close to you. And I could see you were getting close to her too. It's ok, InuYasha. You can be sad."
He looked at her for a moment, lost.
You've been at war with your own emotions for so long, you don't even know what you're allowed to feel, do you?
Before she even knew what she was planning, Kagome reached out, and slid her fingers into his bangs, pushing them back from his eyes, lightly touselling his hair. He looked at her, shocked, but the hurt was stronger.
She smiled sadly, sliding her hand to the back of his head, and gently pulled him towards her.
"C'mere," she murmured, pulling him to her, guiding his head down to her shoulder. For just a fraction of a second, he resisted, but gave way, and rested his head against her shoulder, leaning on her lightly, eyes against the soft curve of her neck.
"You're allowed to be sad, " Kagome whispered, lightly smoothing his hair with her hand, the other one resting gently against his back, "It's ok."
He let out a long sigh, and shivered. He put his arms around her, and stayed that way, face hidden from the world against her. She knew he wouldn't shed any tears...InuYasha probably hadn't shed tears in a long, long time. But it didn't really matter. He needed her, and she would be his shield for tonight.