It was a week after Novosibirisk, when the casualties had been stabilised, Vers prisoners shunted off to POW camps, and the triumph announced over laser transmission by the Russian Premiere. Then the UFE forces rolled a lorry of vodka into an empty hanger, and laughter had a wild, manic edge; whether this victory would be ranked with Stalingrad, or the Little Big Horn, remained to be seen. But it was a true, hard-fought victory. The war to come only made the party more desperate.
A chorus of Russian officers had sung all the patriotic songs they knew, and all the tasteless American pop. Then they'd rolled with laughter to watch Mizusaki belting 'You raise me up' at the back of Magbaredge's head. There was dancing, and no one cared a bit about fraternization rules.
And in a corner, WO Kaizuka Yuki laid her head on a bench and bawled out her grief. Lt Marito sat beside her, sober and silent.
"Ugh…thought this stuff helped…?" She gazed at the empty bottle before her face; Marito grated that it should help her sleep. Sleep without nightmares was all drink gave him, after so many years. It didn't help with the hopeless frustration, or the guilt, anymore, but nothing else did.
Marito could see dozens of silent drinkers slumped about the walls, including a blonde mechanic named Craftman. Smothering the horrors they couldn't change. Burying the razor in their brains, that only grew duller with passing years.
"…hope the Princess got out. She was innocent. He liked her…oh, Nao-kun…!" Marito rested a hand on her shoulders as they quaked.
"He saved us, Kaizuka!"
No answer. No comfort. How could he think of saving her? He'd loved Humeray like a brother, for just six months–nothing in his suffering came close to hers.
How had he even kept himself alive? Oh, yes. He bent down again, shouted over the music;
"Kaizuka, the other kids will need us, tomorrow! Need you! We have to protect them."
"Yeah. Protect them. Kill the Martians, every one of them!" Yuki surged to her feet, almost flooring Marito with her exo-arm, "Serious. They killed my brother, parents, hurt you! Death to Mars!"
An equally drunk American soldier cheered, and pulled Yuki in for a kiss. Marito knocked him down, another American punched Marito, then Yuki sent two men flying into a full table, and things got rather chaotic.
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"…whuzat? Where…?"
"This is your quarters, Officer. No, not the Deucalion, it's kaput remember? Underground." The door grated shut behind them. Marito shifted Yuki's weight against his shoulder, "Sleep on your side or front, I'll get a bucket–"
"Yo-you're…really fine man, Lieutenant."
"Yeah right–" As Marito tried to steer Yuki for her bed, he staggered against the wall. Her body was pressing onto his chest. Those dark, liquid eyes, staring up at him.
"Uh. You are. You were amazing back there. Say…long time since you've…been this close to a woman?"
It had. He was a washed-up drunk, she could've been his daughter! She deserved better, she was innocent…
She was gorgeous. From her first day at work, he'd had hopeless fantasies. Her loving smile, her black stockings, peeled away. Her fingers, pawing at his tie….he caught her hand.
"…Kaizuka, stop. This isn't you. You're the strong one–"
"I couldn't save him." Her head fell to his chest, "He could do anything, I just had to protect him! My little brother. What can I do now? Nothing. Worthless…please, just want to forget..."
No, Yuki. You said I was a fine soldier–the coward who hid in a bottle for fifteen years! That hope, that faith…dying in your eyes, before me. Like Humeray died, like your brother…I still can't save you, and it never hurt so much…
"No. You're not worthless. And we can't forget."
He held her hand. She wrapped her exo-arm round his chest and wouldn't let go. Both of them toppled onto her bed, where she was snoring within seconds.
Marito ruefully grinned. His fantasies hadn't exactly gone like this, but that was definitely for the best. He shifted Yuki around and nestled into her back like a spoon, before falling in exhausted sleep.
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Marito snuck out early next morning, hoping against hope that Yuki might forget everything. Or maybe her hangover would buy him a few hours before the WO twisted his head off, or Magbaredge busted him down to private. However, it was only ten am when Yuki appeared at the door of his quarters, eyes bleary, but determined.
"Kaizuka. I'm sorry. Wait-what…?" She had marched past him, and started thrusting disordered clothes into cupboards.
"This room already stinks of whiskey," She held up a glass bottle."Thought you were quitting, Lieutenant?"
"Yeah, after our battle at Tanigishima last month. Just hadn't thrown it away yet." Yuki upended it into the sink, "Kaizuka…I might've needed that."
"You didn't need it last night."
"You were…had to watch out for you."
"Yes." She was staring up into his eyes again, "You saved me in Shinawara, too–"
"Can you stop that, Officer?" His cold voice stopped her dead, "You don't know what I've lost…what I've done. I failed everyone, everything, for fifteen years–"
"But it's all changed now! We're at war. Everything's fallen apart. We can't fail, not anymore! And I can't watch your past destroy you any longer! You are a fine soldier; we're here, we have to fight…we can't fight alone. Not anymore." Her eyes were liquid fire. But somehow– pleading? "Let me help you, Marito. Please."
"So…I let you devote yourself to fixing the sorry life I wrecked?"
"Yes. Or you could throw me out. Find another bottle. Give in…"
Tears welled in Yuki's eyes. Marito sighed; carefully put his arms around her. She clung to him like a child.
"Yuki…look, sit down. Dr Yagarai would be better, but you can talk to me. About your brother. Ought to act like your lieutenant, for once." Yuki didn't ask, did Lieutenants usually hold their junior officers' hands? She didn't let go, either.
She slowly told Marito how Nao-kun had shopped and cooked for them since he was ten, and woke her up for work on Tuesdays–almost every Tuesday, so she didn't get too carefree. He could've been a general, a Todai professor, maybe even a prince. She was proud of him.
"…every time he fought, it was hopeless. I told him…but every time he tried. Just like Dad, fifteen years ago…just like you, Marito."
"No, I stopped fighting years ago, Yuki. I ran and hid in a bottle–"
"Marito, if we're going to make this work, you need to shut up about how useless and sorry you are. That's a kind of hiding too."
Suffering was cold and vast in her eyes–the carefree young lady her brother had woken was gone. But her voice was determined. Full of the hope Marito knew he would die to protect, a hundred times.
We both lost our loved ones. We suffered so much together, so quickly, like a flashing sheet of flame. And you look to me for what I'm so afraid I can't give you….
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The weeks after Novosibirisk were the last time Rayet had hope left in the world. Castle Cruhteo was somehow destroyed. With surrender of Castle Femianne, Far East Russia was retaken. The Vers offensive in China had stalled. In every soldier's eyes, there was an edgy triumph. Vers could be defeated, the nightmare could end in victory. Even for Rayet, with no home in the world and her father gone forever, the world would change. Hope might exist again.
The British airborne assault on the Stockholm Castle was a costly success, but after that, the Martians were prepared. The next three Castle assaults failed–as the expedition to reclaim Japan did. Rayet fought from her Areion as hard as she could, but the white Kat darted among the tower blocks like a demon. She could do nothing except come back alive.
Afterwards, she stood outside Inko's hospital ward for a long time. Nina finally walked out, rubbing her eyes.
"Has she recovered?"
"I don't know. She's quiet, now...Rayet-San, couldn't you try? I mean, even now the Duecalion's gone, I'm only driving forklifts–I don't know what to say to her! You, like, fight in a Kat, and you, um…"
"I dealt with my father's murder by strangling the Princess. It doesn't seem as if your friend would cope that way." In silence, Nina watched Rayet walk away down the corridor.
Of course, Nina had been Inko's best friend from first year high school. Rayet's father had never let her attend school; he said they learnt nothing but decadent rubbish and Terran lies. She might even start to sympathise with the merciless enemies of their nations, if she attended school with Terrans. Rayet had believed it all; her father had rarely said that he loved her, but she saw in his eyes, every day, that he would jump under a bus for her sake.
But now he was dead. Decadent pity for Terrans, treasonous hatred for Vers–they filled her up to eyeballs now, traitor that she was. All she had been, had been a lie…she could have hated her, father if she hadn't loved him more than her soul.
Vers nobles might distain escape pods and spacesuits, but Vers infiltrators learnt how to head for the hills before the other shoe dropped. It was certainly the first thing Wolfe Areash had taught his daughter, and Rayet could sense the changing mood at Novosibirisk. Outrage, at pure and simple unfairness. No alien movie ever ended like this. Hadn't they ever had a chance? What could they do, but tear apart any Martian their claws could reach?
Long before she might have been thrown in the stockade, Rayet had removed an Arctic survival suit from the stores, erasing the records of it, along with every trace of herself. Thrown a duffel bag over her shoulder, and headed for a gap in the perimeter fence.
"Where are you headed?" A voice behind her. She didn't turn.
"Somewhere I can fight."
"If the UFE won't let you fight, then fight them for it. You'll do more good here–"
"Do good? Me? Weren't you going to kill every last Martian, for your brother's sake, Miss Kaizuka?"
"Don't be absurd. You fought beside us. You're our comrade before anything else."
Rayet was ready to scoff. But in the dusk, Kaizuka Yuki's face and voice somehow reminded her of Kaizuka Inaho. His face, when he returned the gun that she had aimed at his Princess. Rayet she turned, and headed back to Novosibirisk, and the former crew of the Deucalion. However naïve they were, even now–they were the nearest thing to a family she had left.
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Dr Soma Yagarai began Marito's counselling session with his usual pleasant smile. His friend and patient looked neater and better groomed than hitherto, but little happier.
"So, over four months now since spring arrived for Koichiro Marito. How is that going?"
"It's not like that, Doc."
"Indeed, it's almost like high school. She makes you breakfast and lunch; checks your laundry and work schedules every day. You go to fetch her when she can't get up in the morning."
"…I just hold her and let her cry, until she can face a world without her brother. That's all."
"Isn't that hard for you, Marito? You are still on the wagon, aren't you?"
"Since Tanigishima–when we all fought there, I couldn't even start the Areion. I knew I had to stop running, then, for everyone's sake. After that FUBAR attack on Niigata, when Amifumi lost it, and the nightmares had me by the throat…somehow I held together. But I had huge, pointless rows with Yuki around then. They were my stupid fault…Doc, d'you think I took my guilt out on her?"
"It happens, in all kinds of relationships. You made up, didn't you? And before Miss Klein and Miss Amifumi's…departure"
"Yeah…we really made up after that. Girls just left her a note. She was devastated. Would've gone after them…but she really wants to avenge her brother. The Martian girl Rayet needs her too, even Craftman..."
"Quite an amazing woman."
"Look Doc…I know, if her brother hadn't died, she'd never have given me a second chance. Sorry, glance. I swore I wouldn't take advantage of her, I'd blow my brains out first…but we're closer than we should be, and I can't..."
"Aren't you afraid she's using you? Smothering the pain of loss, as if you were a man-sized Scotch bottle?"
"…no. I wouldn't let her if she was. She's been good to me, put up with a ton of my..."
"Marito. This is going to sound weird, but it's just a theory. Miss Kaizuka was sole carer to her brother for most of their lives. I don't think she came to you for comfort, but for someone else to care for. Not that you were just 'someone' to her. I think she's always seen her father in you, who never came home from the war."
"Yagarai. You trying to make me feel worse for wanting to sleep with her? Some father–!"
"You knew there were problems, or you would have slept with her before. She's looking for you to protect her like a father, to be cared for like a brother, and be close to her as a lover. It's honestly not a wrong or even unhealthy start to a lovely relationship."
"Says the psychiatrist...you mean the brother-thing and father-thing balance out?"
"They might. I would work up to telling her about your nightmares; she needs to see the worst if you're serious. If you want to do something for her, try making her breakfast. I promise, I'll eat your practise attempts myself. By the by, is our gallant Captain still on board with your relationship?"
"Yeah. She said we've both been working better than ever. She's almost friendly, these days. Mizusaki even wished a long and happy future to Yuki and me in our New Years' cards."
"Lt Mizusaki aside...the Captain's warmer feelings may result from my showing her the video of your therapy sessions."
"That's illegal, isn't it?"
"True, if the Japanese Medical Association wasn't a smoking ruin, I could be in serious trouble. I thought–"
"–yeah, you were right. Thanks. I wanted to tell her about Humeray, but I never could've...I'll have to tell Yuki myself though. You didn't show her–?"
"Not a peek."
"Okay. You're...a really great guy, Doc. Don't know where I'd be without you."
"Lets not get too sentimental, Lieutenant..."
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Nearly five months after Novosibirisk, the Vers dropped two Argyres north of Magadan, and rapidly advanced towards the captured Castle Femmianne. UFE orders were for a fighting retreat and evacuation by air, conserving their Kats for more significant defences. Some pilots fought longer than others.
"Clydesdale-11, get back!" Yuki bit her lip, fired again–incredibly, the sniper round blew out the Agyre's right elbow. "No! You got his attention! MOVE!"
"One more, Lieutenant! We can beat them, if we just try–!"
"KAIZUKA! No hero's death in action! We know what that means!"
Marito swung his Areion out into the street. He opened up on the Argyre; fire danced before his eyes. He had to save them, this time…
The Argyre staggered; another sniper round had hit its right side. Then it dashed away, on spindly silver legs, towards the second sniper team. All of them died under its active blade field, for daring to strike at their conquerors. Then the damaged machine fled. The lone Vers Kat attacking from the North East withdrew as well.
Yuki had run, without a second shot, as had Marito. Afterwards, they parked their Areions on an empty lot. She ran to him.
"I'm sorry, Lt Marito…"
"Don't die. Just don't die, Yuki…it's okay. Man, you got him! You were strong."
"And you were brave. Just like Shinawara...I guess we'll always have Shinawara?"
"Yeah. Here's looking at you, kid."
Yuki laughed. The carefree smile on her lips...the smile Marito hadn't seen since Novosibirisk.
"...Marito?"
"Yuki? Can I tell you, you look beautiful in that suit?"
She put her arms round his neck. He raised her face to his. She told him, later, he was the first man she'd ever kissed.
Within days, the unwounded Argyre attacked again, beside a new Kat, with a glowing shield and sword that shot plasma beams. The retreat this time was headlong.
Marito didn't find out until they were half-way back to Novosibirisk that Dr Yagarai Souma had been moonlighting at one of the last military hospitals to be evacuated before Vers ground troops arrived. He had been on a helicopter downed by an SAM.
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"Psychosomatic medicine? Do you need a doctorate for that?"
Souma could barely make out the scruffy white beard and glasses of his interrogator, with his own glasses lost, and one eye swollen over. He managed a smile.
"You have the advantage of me, Dr Troyard. I'm afraid I've had too many demanding patients to read a single one of your papers." Dr Troyard smiled very briefly, and put his notes aside.
"You were on the Deucalion. I'm going to ask you one question, once only. Where are the rest of its former crew?"
"Ah. We saw Princess Asseylum's speech, of course…she really does love your son doesn't she? Congratulations…and she doesn't know he killed Kaizuka Inaho?" Troyard's gaze didn't flicker. Soma smiled again, "Well, I have been known to reveal my patients' confidential information, in exceptional circumstances…so I'm very glad to tell you, I have no idea."
Seizing his bound arms, two plain-clothes Versians pulled Dr Yagarai to his feet. One asked Dr Troyard, should they take him to the cellar?
"…no. He really doesn't know anything. Dispose of him the usual way."
The security men (later killed by a Terran bomb in Afghanistan) particularly remembered Dr Yagarai's face. Slaine's father expected to forget him, but didn't. At first he looked simply lost, unable to understand why his life was ending. But something buried in his eyes seemed to speak with the star-bright madness in Troyard's. It was an almost child-like hope.