MY FATE IS WRONG! as expected

by CacciaFulmini

7 Masters 9 Servant 2 Hachimans 1 Holy Grail and 3 Protagonists ready to fight for they dreams in a massive battle between ancient and nascent heroes the world has yet to see, Who's gonna win? the Loner, the Sword, the Homunculus or someone entirely different.[UBW storyline various elements from Kaleid & Apocripha Oregairu from vol 11](Powerful 8man & OtakuSieg) Loner IV ON

2. The sword the Homunculus the Nightmare I

CHAPTER ONE:

EVENTUALLY THE HOLY GRAIL WAR BEGIN

(but first a commercial)

---

Yes I know what are you thinking...

Assassin you fight awesome battles every day how can your hair be always so perfect?!

the answer...I use Einzbern regenerate and protect with reinforcement crystals.
the new formula of the Einzbern family shampoo protect each hair from the root
bye bye hair worn by curses and Noble Phantasm.

call now the 800 700 900 to order Einzbern regenerate and protect with reinforcement crystals and you will receive the official hairdryer of the Einzbern family with flamethrower incorporated.

I have a Holy Grail War to fight and my look has to be be always at the top.
So
I choose Einzbern regenerate and protect with reinforcement crystals and you?
Which shampoo are you gonna choose?

Attention
the repeated use of Einzbern regenerate and protect with reinforcement crystals can cause:
Whitening of the hair
developement of the scalp consciousness
bad breath
and
death
read carefully the instruction

This commercial was brought to you by the Einzbern family official sponsor of the Holy Grail War

---

"how was that Einzbern-san?"

"GOOD HACHIMAN, BUT I WANT TO SEE MORE FIRE, MORE PASSION OH AND EXPLOSIONS IN THE BACKGROUND"

"What !?"

"YOU'RE RIGHT EXPLOSIONS ARE SO DE-MODE...LET'S GO WITH A TIMELAPS VIDEO IN BLACK AND WHITE OF YOU DURING A SHOWER OR SOMETHING"

"I don't want to be monotonous, but What!?
by the way what's the price of the shampoo?"

"SILLY HACHIMAN, A SOUL OF COURSE EHEHE"

"I'm out of here"

*sound of a slammed door

"WAIT YOU SIGNED A CONTRACT"

---

THE SWORD I

"s..ro"
"shi.."
"SHIRO WAKE UP"
a voice called me early in the morning. The air was chilly, and my back was aching

"I have slept again in the toolshed...when will I learn"
I thought, while my brain slowly returned from the land of dreams.

"SHIRO ARE YOU AWAKE!?"
continued the voice louder than before.

I struggled to open my eyes and to connect that voice to a face.

"Yes yes I'm awake, difficult to not be it with your screams...Taiga?"
I said guessing the identity of my human alarm with my eyes still closed

"I'm not Taiga Fujimura I'm REVENGE"
the voice...I mean Fuji-nee retorted with almighty tone.

"okay...Fuji-nee you're revenge...I 'm going to sleep other five minutes"
I boredly responded to my guardian.

I didn't want to wake up, today I had no important classes, no part-time and judging from the cool air in the toolshed it was still very early...

"WAIT A MINUTE WHY IS TIGER HERE BEFORE SAKURA"
I mentally screamed opening my eyes.

something horrible was going to happen.
I could feel it under my skin.
the situation itself was too much of an anomaly and that meant only one thing

bad news.

My senses began to warn me of a danger chasing away the all traces of my slumber, my heart began to soundly pound as my blood vigorously flowed in my four limbs.

*suiiun
a strange sound reached my ears.
something was flying towards me, It took me a second to realize it was some kind of cilinder...four feet long I judged

"FIGHT!"
screamed Taiga charging at me with another cylinder in her hand

I didn't need to think too much about what to do, my body just acted on its own; with one fluid movement I jumped on my feet and caught the flying cilinder in my right hand.

"It's light"
I realized slashing my weapon against Fuji-nee's one

*tung
a hollow noise resounded as our two cylinder clashed.

"Good Shiro! Now show me your power"
said Fuji-nee with mocking voice while just our "swords" divided us...Actualy those swords were rolled up poster of a 100 yen shop

"What is wrong with you? Assaulting me with a poster in the morning are you crazy...or drunk?"
I asked confused, angry, sleepy and...I have already said confused.

"AHAHA QUESTION ARE FOR WEAKLINGS SHIRO AND
NO!
I'M NOT DRUNK "
screamed the..."adult" stepping back and gripping the poster like a kendo sword

"really why can't you be a normal person"
I muttered at the failure of diplomacy .

mimicking Taiga I assumed a fighting stance and rose my poster.
Apparentely I had to fight for...reasons...I guess

" well at least she didn't attacked me with a metal pipe...again"
I thought fixing my eyes on Fuji-nee "sword"

(A/N to aliment this no-sense listen to "You say run" My Hero Academy ost)

"WAAAAAAAAA!"
she roared beginning the battle and slashing her poster towards my left shoulder.

"RRRRRAAAAAAA"
I responded rising my weapon to parry her attack

*tung
the posters clashed and incredible but true, I nearly lost the grip of my weapon. Taiga even with a sword made of paper could strike with fearsome power

"Okay the situation might be a little more serious than I thought"
I whispered dodging and parring all the incoming slashes of the Tiger.

She was like an hurricane. Attacks kept coming from every possible direction and I was unable to do anything else than defend myself and losing ground against this skilled opponent.

*tung
*tung
*tung
*tung
*tung
*tung

tens of those hollow sounds echoed in the toolshed as I and Taiga clashed.
head, arms, shoulder, legs and torso, there wasn't a single part of my body safe from that tiger's fury; her swordmanship was precise and flawless while mine was clumsy and inexperienced. I kept falling in her feints and I couldn't manage to do a proper strike
It was clear for anybody who saw us that the Tiger had the upper hand, her poster was cutting through the air like a real sword storming on me with an insane amount of slashes and thrusts.

"This is bad I'm getting cornered"
I thought in the heat of the battle while my poster continued to clash against my guardian's one

"You're no match for me!"
roared the woman unleashing another storm of attacks

"DO NOT UNDERSTIMATE ME!"
I responded overly involved in the fight and decided to back off anymore

Swing to the head. Intercept.

To the tights. Dodge.

To the waist, Dodge again.

To the left arm, parry.

To the right arm, parry once more.

Thrust in ribs.

"fuck!"
I muttered as I failed to keep up with Taiga's hits

Slash to the right shoulder

to the waist

Thrust to the chest.

Taiga continued to mercilessly attack me like a storm.

"ULTRA SUPER DUPER MEGA ALPHA OMEGA TIGER SLASH!"
spitted out that monster unleashing a devastating comb-

"AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH"

[CENSORED THE WHOLE SCENE IS TOO BRUTAL]

Then after she had abused of my poor body for nearly two consecutive minutes I fell on my knees heavily breathing.
my body was aching everywhere, my brain was wondering how a poster made of paper cold hurt so much and my right hand let its grip loose on my trusted sword

I had been defeated.

"do you surrender?"
Asked me that odious woman pointing her poster on my throat .

"not yet"
I thought while the image of that demon evilly grinning flashed in my brain

...I was there on the ground she only needed one last strike to end that fight, but no, she didn't just want to win...she wanted to shame me to make me admit I have been defeated by her.

"Shiro Emiya do not play following these rules"
I told myself tightening my grip around the poster

"your answer Shiro"
Taiga said again sure about her victory.

"n..t..e.."
I whispered quietly to confuse her

"What?"
she asked puzzled

"I said NOT YET"
I screamed standing and swinging my poster one last time towards my opponent's face.

"the victory is mine"
I thought looking in the eyes of Fuji-nee.

Unfortunately... my action had been seen through.
When my last slash started the Tiger was ready.

With a swift movement of her wrist she intercepted my weapon and disarmed me

"Naive Shiro..."
she whispered making me lose all the hopes I had as the time slowed down.
the only things I saw at the end were the muscles of Fuji-nee tensed and the empty sound of my lost weapon in my ears

"AND NOW DIE"
the woman screamed hitting my face with her sword.

"Kiritsugu I am sorry"
were my last thoughts

before
"AHHHH IT HURTS DAMMIT"
the poster bent around my temples

"Oh yes!
the Tiger of Fuyuki strikes back!
you're ten years to early to challenge me !"

---

(ten minutes later)

"ahahahah you should have seen your face Shiro hahahahahah"
began to laugh like an idiot Taiga while I was preparing breakfast

"you were all NOT YET! ahahah but I kicked your butt ahahah"
she continued as small tears came out of her eyes.

"ah ah ah...it's not funny"
I retorted annoyed and blushing

"by the way it's possible to know why did you come here to assault me?"
I asked to Fuji-nee while the sound of bacon frying teased my appetite

"IT'S BECAUSE OF YOU ALL THE SCHOOL KNOWS THAT STUPID NICKNAME"
she exploded

"you mean Tiger?"
I asked bringing to the table three dishes full of a proteic breakfast on the table.

"YES!
oh eggs and bacon"
responded the woman switching mood in front of the food

"Oh that's right, I'm sorry"
I uncaringly said starting to eat

"Ywo bewwer be"

"please swallow before you talk. But really did you really came here just for a petty revenge?"

"It's not petty, but no I came for another reason"
said the woman dressed with a green striped yellow shirt and a green jacket.
(after she had finally swallowed)

"Thank god, I hate when the pieces of food in her mouth reach me"
I thought

"First :I came here because I'm going to take to the station the exchange student
Second to tell you to go in the principal office before lunch break for meeting him
Third to warn you that he will have all his luggages with him so he might need an hand or two"
she explained sounding mature

but I knew the real reason

"and Fourth to grab breakfast"
I added viciously

"why you always point this things out"
the woman muttered puffing her cheeks

Really she was such a baby sometimes.

---

After Fuji-nee gave me those information she quickly finished her breakfast. That is a kind way to say she dismembered bacon and eggs like a lion do with its prey. Then she flew away from the house jumped on her scooter and disappeared in a cloud of smoke to reach the station.

"I wonder if she realize that the exchange student is carrying the luggage to live outside home for an entire month"
I thought hypothesizing how they would have survived on the way to school.

"well is going to be fine"
I told myself beginning to clean the kitchen to kill time until Sakura arrived.

Today was a cloudy Friday of february and I have to admit I was quite anxious after all today I was going to meet the person I would have lived with for the next month.
So in my head I was doing a list of things I hoped he didn't do

"chew with the mouth open"
"sing under the shower (I'm the only one that can do that)"
"cook better than me"
[...two hundred things later]

"Oh and he can't be taller than you"
said Fridge-kun through my hand

"You're right!"

"Senpai who are you talking to?"
a voice called me...It was Sakura and she was rising an eyebrow

"oh Sakura I didn't hear you coming"
I kindly said ignoring her question and smiling

"please sit down breakfast is ready"
I added while in my mind...

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
When did she get here?
is she a ninja?
I should put a bell on her"

---

Sakura's mind part 5

"does he know I have arrived since he said
cook better than me
Right?

really senpai sometimes remain closed in his bubble of thoughts
he didn't even realized I took 27 photos of him...*click
28
on my smartphone today

maybe it's better if I change my password from 1234 to something more...
sophisticated

like 1235

Oh bacon!

*click
29"

---

"so senpai today is the day"
told me Sakura happily tasting her eggs

she had a few leftovers on her cheecks...so clumsily cute

"Yeah I'm bit scared to honest"
I said while my hands began to search unconsciously for a napkin

the past evening I had what people call a change of mind. "Have a complete stranger that can discover my secret around home for a month...no thank you"
but I had give my word to Fuji-nee and It was too late now... so I had to go with the flow
yet deep in my heart
I..
I
I hoped that Taiga's scooter scared the hell out of the exchange student and made him run away

"why ?"
asked the girl putting her index on her lips

"well first of all it might be difficult to get along and you know while I try to be always polite I have a few quirks that people can find annoying"
I said with an ironic smile avoiding to introduce the topic "I'm a magus ya now"

"don't worry senpai it's going to be fine. To me even with a few weird traits you're always perfect"
the kind girl said deeply blushing

"thanks Sakura now all my worries are gone"
I responded smiling embarrassed and leaning forward.

I and Sakura were seated on two opposite sides of the table and as I began to bend my back towards her Sakura did the same.
We kept to close the distance between us in our eyes there was some kind of magnetic attraction I couldn't escape.

"A little more a little more"
I thought while Sakura's face was moving forward...for some reason the face of the girl was progressively becoming redder and redder, but most important why was she rippling her lips ?

"okay now"
I told myself doing my move

---

Sakura's mind part 6

"It's happening
all neurons ready it's happening

I knew my subtle confession would have worked
ALL MY NOTICE ME SENPAI HAVE FINALLY WORKED

now give those lips
GIVE THEM TO ME

wait...what the fuc-"

---

"and now you are clean"
I said passing a napkin on Sakura's face

"you were dirty on your cheeks"
I explained to a...contritely Sakura.
her face was kind of paralysed in a grimace while her left eye was twitching; like it was trying to send a message in morse

"point ...line...point
w-h-y s-e-n-p-a-i w-h-y
it must be a coincidence..."
I thought while my cute kohai's brain stopped to have multiple short-cuts

"okay if you have done with breakfast
I guess we can go to school"
I happily said

"...not your time yet Sakura calm down, calm down...even the smallest river can carve a canyon"
the girl muttered following me with mechanical movements.

---

MEANWHILE

"Hold tight Hikigaya-kun"

"you're joking right?"

"NOPE"

"I have at least 120...I mean 20 kilo worth of stuff with me"

"SO?"

"..."
*vroom

"I want to go back in CHIBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

---

*DRINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

"okay students is lunch pause your free"
Said Fujimori-sensei my science teacher after a long morning of lesson

"thank God"
I muttered as my teacher's prophetic words made me reborn from that state of semi-ataraxy I fell into every friday after a whole week of school.

That Friday (if you don't count the unexpected wake up spar) had been an extremely boring day.
Nothing new happened just the same classes with the same people.
and don't get me wrong I generally "like" classes and the people of my class but in this period was coming Saint Valentine.
all the chatter of my class was only about who was going to confess and about who was going to be rejected...
I was pretty sure people made bets on the latter topic.
but to me Saint Valentine meant something else...an insane amount of obligatory chocolate from all the clubs I helped.

"Oh no... what a nightmare..."
had said Issei sarcastically when I exposed the problem
But he didn't understand one thing their chocolate sucks
and when I say sucks I mean really, it's disgusting.
It didn't matter whenever the chocolate was bought or handmade
it was ALWAYS horrible.
And even with all the good intentions I couldn't bring myself to be happy about diabetic bars of cocoa or bitter masses of butter.

"But did I ever trash something ?
NO
I ate everything because that what true heroes of justice (or people that have just broke up with their boy/girlfriend) do"

---

Sakura's mind part 7

"AND HERE WE FUCKING ARE IN THE MOST DANGEROUS PERIOD OF THE YEAR
do I have everything to ruin the chocolate masses of bitches give to MY senpai

burned sugar
check
sour butter
check
and my favorite
lemon
check.

---

Separing myself from the rest of my classmates
I quietly walked towards the principal's office nervously whistling a tune I came out with on the spot
(Brave shine)

I was tense, more than I would have allowed myself to say. I knew that with a person under my roof whenever I tried to train I there was the chance of my secret being discovered.

"Maybe I should just resign myself and drop my training for a month"
I whispered uncertain

I already was a sorry excuse for a mage so the idea of stopping training didn't appeal me too much.
Many doubts and questions crowded my head when I finally reached the door of office of the principal;

"Okay Shiro com'on you can do it open this simple green door with a metallic handle."
I couldn't do it, all my instincts just told me to walk away...but no I was going to become an hero of justice so...

"I faced the Tiger of Fuyuki I can accept a stranger in my house"
I slowly extended my hand repeating myself this spell

Surprisingly it totally calmed me...

"better be discovered than face Taiga?"
I thought noticing that beside the door there were two blue trolleys and a silver briefcase.
the exchange student was already here

"Oh He survived Taiga's scooter, god...damn Taiga you had one job, scare the guy was it so difficult?"
I muttered annoyed

I finally knocked the door of the principal filled with both "curiosity" and "optimism"

*knock
*knock

"please come in"
responded the professional voice of the principal Mrs Yurishina...don't be fouled by the appealing surname she was a stocky woman in her fifties

"Good morning"
I introduced myself entering in the room furnished only with green stuff (...really there were at least 37 different shades) a.k.a the principal's office.

"ah Emiya-san I was beginning to think you got lost"
said the woman

"I'm sorry"
I responded politely looking around the office.

besides the principal there were other two people in the office:
One was Fuji-nee and the other was a boy of my age: with messy black hai-
"are those twigs!"
I thought watching who I supposed was Hikigaya Hachiman.

it must have been a tough day for him...his hair were filled with leaves and twigs like he crashed in a bush while his school uniform composed of a white shirt and a black blazer was all crumpled.

"please take seat "
esorted me the principal

so with slow steps I went to seat beside Fuji-nee and the exchange student throwing to my sisterly figure the "What have you done?" stare.
that of course she brushed of with a ignorant smile.

"Now Hikigaya-san allow me to introduce you Emiya Shiro.
you will stay with him for the next month"
said the principal pointing at me.

acting on reflex I turned my head towards the other boy in the room.

"Hikigaya Hachiman nice to meet you"
he said slightly bending his neck towards me while our eyes met

the only thought that surged in my mind was "hurray...another Matou Shinji"

"Emiya Shiro the pleasure is mine"
I responded automatically staring right in the poker face of that Hikigaya Hachiman.

for a moment I felt my breath stuck in my lungs.

He was...strange
not in the sense his face was deformed or anything, he was pretty ordinary from that point of view he just his lineaments a bit sharper than normal people.
What made me think he was strange
were his eyes.

They were like Kiritsuku's
Dead
Dull
And looked like they saw the world as nothing mattered

yet...
YET

they seemed how can I say different than my latter father's one in a way I couldn't describe...maybe it was just the enormous eye bags he had, sign of countless sleepless nights

"so let's start with logistic information Hikigaya-san as you know[...BORING STUFFFFFFFF ]
The headmistress began to explain all the information we needed to know about he exchange project.

Hikigaya listened the whole time maintaining an expressionless face, that was quite contrasting respect to his messy outfit.

---

(twenty minutes later)

"And for now that's it enjoy your lunch pause"
concluded the president sending me and Hikigaya out of her office.

both of us came out of the office and for two awkward seconds none of us spoke...

"okay say something...anything...just say it! Emiya!"
I told myself.

"S-"

"Emiya would you mind to show me the way for the cafeteria"
the boy said before I could began my brilliant discourse

(He had planned only the first "So")

"Sure follow me "
I said easy going gesturing to the boy to follow me.

we quickly began to walk for the school hallways while a few students began to whisper as they saw Hikigaya's uniform
they easily realized he wasn't from our school.
Nothing out of ordinary here.

Unfortunately Hikigaya didn't seem familiar with the attention of casual students, to someone less attentive to details the bored expression of Hikigaya didn't show any emotion but, while the muscles of his face were pretty much immobile his eyes were carefully studing everything around him.

"tell me Hikigaya do you have any hobby ?"
I asked me to make conversation, and to avoid that Hikigaya became overly conscious of the other people stares.

"reading, I'm quite a reader"
he responded with rasping voice forgetting about the other students

"and you Emiya?"
He asked

"I like to cook and ...
I think cooking is my only hobby"
I said uneasy realizing I was really bad at making casual conversation with someone I just met

"Really?
I suppose I will taste your cooking at least one time during this exchange"

"I think it would be more than just one time...I live alone so I always cook all the meals"

"Don't you live with Fujimura-sensei?"

"Eh...no
while she is my legal guardian we are not blood related..."

"..."

"she lives in her own house...while I live in my latter father's one
but don't worry that woman spend more time in my own than her own so it's rare not having her around the house."

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to be indelicate"

"don't worry"
I said concluding the conversation that from casual had become awkward.

"yare yare good grief me"
I thought entering in the cafeteria

the whole room was filled with students and even with my sharp eyes I could find a single table free.

"Am I forgetting something"
I thought pointing at Hikigaya the various vending machine for the drinks, the sandwiches and for the meal tickets.

"so what you'd like to eat ?"
I asked to the boy that was intensely staring at the drinks vending machine

"I will go to buy a yakisoba pan...
my stomach is a bit closed after...the travel to the school"
said Hikigaya gradually growing paler

"Fuji-nee what have you done!"
I wondered watching at Hikigaya's anemic face.

---

the incredible journey of Taiga and Hachiman

" Lower you head HIKIGAYA"

"WHAT!?"

*tree branch

---

"why don't you go to buy two drinks while I grab the sandwiches?
Then we can meet here...OH NOW I REMEBER !
I'm supposed to take you to the student council room for lunch
so you can meet the student president!"
I said to Hikigaya that with a simple nod accepted and went on his way.

"Quite the reader, but not the talker uh?"
I muttered while he moved away

and so I went to buy my and Hikigaya's lunch.
without even realizing that I didn't told him which drink I wanted.

---

after we finally ended to buy our food the two of us headed towards the student council room

"I can't believe it three vending machine for drinks and not a single MAX COFFEE"
Hikigaya muttered tightly grasping in his hand the yakisoba pan and a generic can of coffee

"wow he must be pretty into that drink to get angry when he can't find it"
I thought watching a web of veins pulse on his forehead.

"here we are!"
I cheerfully exclaimed point the student council room.

"thank god we arrived in time"
I muttered scared of the murderous intent Hikigaya was emitting

"ah Emiya you're finally here"
said Issei in front his half-finished bento

"Sorry there were a lot of people in the cafeteria today"
I came out with a plausible excuse

" Well it's not a problem..ah you must be the exchange student"
stood up Issei walking towards the door

"Nice to meet you I'm the student council president my name is Ryuudou Issei"
He professionally introduced to Hikigaya bowing a bit

"Hikigaya Hachiman"
responded the exchange student with a small nod.

without further delay the three of us took a seat and began to eat

---

the lunch was progressing quietly

"ah lemonade my favorite drink"
I thought sipping from my can the sour sweet juice while Issei and Hikigaya were discussing about school related topic.

in this moment Issei was interrogating Hikigaya about his school.
apparently he came from a private highschool that required to pass a tough entrance exam to be allowed to attend.

"So all the students must be pretty smart"
said Issei doing the reflection thing with his glasses

"...How did you do that..
I-I mean actually no...in my school there is plenty of dumb people,
but they were admitted because they lived within a determined area"
Hikigaya pointed out with a scoffing grin

"That's so...
and how is your student council"
my friend asked hiding behind a polite voice a burning challenge

"It sucks"
simply retorted Hikigaya after a moment of recollection

"YES! I mean oh...why so?"

"Let's say that this year's election for the student president were a bit...forced"
Hikigaya muttered cryptically ignoring Issei outburst

"please define"

"please another question"

"..."

"..."

"Fine
have your eyes got any problems?"

"...and there we go...
NO
MY
EYES
ARE
FINE"

"ok...wrong question
Are you part of any club? besides the Archery club of course"
resigned Issei

"The Service club and...I'm not part of the Archery club"
Hikigaya with his usual bored tone biting his sandwich

"WAIT YOU AREN'T PART OF THE ARCHERY CLUB!"
I screamed overreacting while the casual conversations about archery I prepared during lunch turned out to be useless

*Swallow

"Good he doesn't speak with food in his mouth"
I thought

(1 point out of 215 check)

"nope I became part of the exchange project because there were no volunteers"
He said uncaring

"Relax Emiya.
he is just in the same situation as you"
retorted Issei about my earlier explosion

"Uh?
You're not part of the Archery"
said confused Hikigaya in a diametral opposite fashion compared to me

"Eheheh no...I'm not part of the Archery club anymore
I dropped out an year ago after I injured myself."
I explained

"...okay...so you're not the student that is coming in my house next month"
asked Hikigaya directing his dull eyes towards my face

"No I'm not"

"but you're the one hosting me right?
let me guess
the teacher in charge of the project forgot about it...she couldn't find anyone able to host me in time
and you got caught in the crossfire"
said Hikigaya while his dull eyes assumed a wicked light

"That's awfully specific...and how do you know it's a she"
I questioned

"Your guardian when is anxious mutter disconnected phrases,
when we were heading in the principal office she was pretty anxious...
I just collected all the pieces of -Bless shiro- and -I forgot... the principal is going to kill me-"
he said quietly

"That woman ..I apologize for her behavior"
I muttered ashamed

"switching topics what's this Service club your part of"
Issei said forcing himself in the conversation

Really that guy hated to be cut out from conversations.

"Nothing special; it's a club that helps people when they come with a request"
Hikigaya explained drily

"Ah the club right for you Emiya"
Issei commented

"I dunno maybe"

"Why you say so Ryuudou?"

"Well Hikigaya you must know that Shiro Emiya here is the next door's boy of this school.
He's the one that repairs all the equipments of all the clubs whenever he has free time"
the president said like I was some kind of tool exposed in a commercial.

---

Eventually the lunch pause ended.

me and Issei headed towards the class 2-c while Hikigaya attending the human studies course in his school had to go in the class 2-A.
Tohsaka's and Mitsuzuri's class to be clear...

"who knows if she has asymmetrical twintails today."
I thought about Tohsaka leaning on my desk

"she probably is going to offer to show him around and...
WAIT IS HE IN CLASS WITH MITSUZURI
she is going to use him to reach me
her gremlins..."
I reflected reaching a terrible truth.

my heart skipped a beat

"naaaa it's not like she is that desperate to bring me back in the club"
I didn't even know how wrong I was

---

Meanwhile

"okay Hachiman you face terrible dangers everyday
you can decently introduce yourself in front of a mass of dumb teenagers"

"Welcome your new classmate"

*step step

"Good afternoon I'm Hikiman Hachigaya"

DAMMIT

---

As my desire to go home grew the classes of the afternoon slowly came to an end.
I had carefully planned all the school tour for Hikigaya...plus a few excuses in case Mitsuzuti tried to tag along

*driiinnnnnn
the sound of the school bell gave me the only signal I needed.
putting all my material in my school bag quickly I came out from my class tagging along with Issei and reached the entrance were I was supposed to meet Hikigaya.

Issei and I had to wait five minutes before he arrived with his back slightly bent forward, silent feet and hands in his pockets, his signature pace in other words

"sorry I'm late"
he said emotionless like usual

"Lost in the school"
I joked

"not exactly..."
he muttered

"What do you mea-"

"THERE YOU ARE!"
screamed Ayako Mitsuzuri's voice

"forget my question, I get it"
I said watching the earlier mentioned girl run across the school entrance waving in her right arm...

"Is that Tohsaka!?"
outbursted Issei interrupting my accurate description

yeah Mitsuzuri was waving in the air Rin Tohsaka like flag

"Tsundere arketype and crazy girl incoming
RUN FOR YOUR LIFE"
exclaimed Hikigaya as I saw for the first time show an emotion different from "..."

Without realizing it Issei and I wisely choose to follow Hikigaya's advice and began to run all around the school complex

(enjoy ten seconds of Running in the 90's)

"up the stairs"

"left"

"right"

"down the stairs"
I dictated direction to escape from our huntress

"Thank God I planned Hikigaya's tour"
I thought aware that if I haven't revised the layout of the school Mitsuzuri would have already caught us

"Hey Emiya it's not like you have the idea of joining back to the Archery club?"
Asked me Hikigaya still running.

so Mitsuzuri had really assaulted him

"at this point I even might"
I responded with nearly no air left in my lungs

"REALLY !?"
exclaimed Mitsuzuri coming out from the corner in front of me with a green Tohsaka in her right hand.

"AH?"
"AH?"
"AH?"
Issei, I and Hikigaya said braking suddenly

"How did ..."
"It's a nightmare"
"What the fuc-"
was probably the only three possible thoughts in our mind

for ten seconds no one dared to speak until

"Ayako where am I?"
a nauseated groan of Rin Tohsaka calmed everyone

---

"So Tohsaka offered to show Hikigaya the school, he said there was already Emiya for the job but then Mitsuzuri grabbed Hikigaya and Tohsaka seeing the chance to come after Emiya.
Understanding the situation Hikigaya managed to escape from Mitsuzuri's grasp and reached me and Emiya, but Mitsuzuri had yet to give up and began to chase us.
I have summed up everything"
said Issei after the five of us peacefully gathered in front of a random class.

"yeah pretty much"
agreed Tohsaka

"So...now do everyone agree to show around Hikigaya without training for the Olympics this time"
I carefully said

"fine to me "
"I had already offered"
"Actually I...(intense stares )...oky"
"It's not like I have a choice"

agreed in their own way Issei, Tohsaka, Mitsuzuri and Hikigaya, he was really a sunray...

---

the next half hour we spent it doing the official tour of Fuyuki's highschool
showing to the new student all the corners of the place while he muttered something about "his new lunch spot".

"we are back at the entrance and so I think that we have done
Good work everyone"
said Issei putting the word end to the tour of the school and going to conclude his council president duties

"well I think I shall take my leave as well"
said Tohasaka turning her heels

" good Idea"
added Mitsuzuri leaving me and Hikigaya alone...

The two of us bathing in a few rays of warm light took a few breaths.

"So what you think about this school?"
I asked watching an indeterminated point

"It's too soon to make a fair judgment, but...Nice. It seems a quiet place or at least...quiter than my highschool
After all there are about half the students here"
Hikigaya responded staring at the nothingness while a few shades of bitterness coloured his voice.

and so we remained another full minute like that; in front of the entrance kissed by golden light thinking about anything that ran in our minds
Until

"Hikigaya what are we staring at?"
I asked tired of that too peaceful silence

"I don't know I was about to ask you the same"
he responded with bored tone.

"shall we go to take in my home your luggages?"

"Fine...just no more scooters"
He responded re-assuming an anemic face.

Without saying anything else we turned around and began to walk taking by Hikigaya's request the long way the passed in front all the vending machine of drinks.

"I can't believe that in the whole school there isn't a single can of Max Coffee.
Why people do not understand its greatness"
the dark haired boy muttered angrily.

"You're really into it uh?"
I asked amazed by how a simple drink could influence so much the mood of this boy

"You can say it...I will just buy it in a convenience store"
He scoffed..giving just a second of his attention

"Maybe it won't even be necessary, usually the vending machines have MAX COFFEE
it's just a coincidence that there wasn't any today."
I tried to calm him with a strained smile

"if you say so..."

"yeah yeah besides it's not like somebody stole all the canned coffee of the city"

---

"Assassin were have you been?"

"To do the shopping Ruler"

"without your wallet...?"

"..."

"And why there is a truck outside?"

"Master I can explain..."

"Sure you will old man...but first Jeanne please give this Servant a napkin
he is dirty of coffee"

---

"okay we can go "
said Hikigaya carrying one trolley in each hand plus his silver briefcase under the right armpit

"What are you saying let me give you a hand"
I exclaimed extending my left arm towards the silver briefcase

"WAIT this no!"
outbursted Hikigaya

"okay...what about one of the trolley"
I re-offered smiling and thinking
"What hell is wrong with him...there must be something very delicate inside."

"..fine..damn riajuu aura"
he muttered handing over the trolley.

"he doesn't likes to receive help uh"
I commented in my brain as general identikit of Hikigaya was being formed in my mind.

and to be clear it wasn't exactly positive:

while I was sure he was a smart and polite person
to me Hikigaya seemed the kind of person that minded only to his own business...not something wrong per se.
But something that brought him to be a loner. He didn't talk to anyone except if he had to or if it was just common politeness .
When we passed beside a girl that had just dropped a few books... he completely ignored her while I stopped to help her.
And last but not least, from a few of the muttered comments Hikigaya did when he thought I couldn't hear him like
"Fucking Riajuus why this tour is taking so long"
or
"Shit I just want to sleep"
I discovered a terrible thing... Hikigaya was a lazy ass.

---

For the next fifteen minutes both Hikigaya and I walked without speaking a single word
our small journey was quiet, the light of the day had almost faded out and the road was practically empty.

only Hikigaya, I, 6 or 5 kids playing with a ball and a few sporadic cars animated the lonely residential street.
nothing could go wrong except...

"OH SHIT!
Hikigaya is my polar opposite in a tons of aspects"
I realized, beginning to think that maybe living together with him wasn't going to be as easy as I imagined.

"what if he team up with Fuji-nee"
I thought as my teeth began to tremble and my feet stopped to move...

"Oh com'n Shiro you're just over thinking things, you have known this guy for four hours?"
I told myself returning to walk.

"just to know is your home still far"
asked Hikigaya heavily breathing.

"naa we are here. It's right behind this corner"
I answered easy going

"He doesn't seem to be good at sports"
I mentally added to my mental identikit seeing Hikigaya on the verge of collapsing.

judging by his face a person could have imagined he had walked all the way up to here, carrying insanely heavy luggage. But I was carrying with me one of his trolley and...it was pretty light

"Maybe I'm just too strong"
I told myself joking.

Then something I couldn't predict happened.
Hikigaya and I were just about to turn the corner when the ball of the kids beside us bounced in the middle of the road..
it had slipped away from the hands of one them.
A pure coincidence.
of course the immediately chased it.
but at the same time a car was passing in the road.
another coincidence.

Unfortunately those two innocent coincidences were the perfect recipe for a tragedy.

I didn't had to think, I acted out of pure instinct.
letting go everything I had in my hands my feet began to dash towards that kid in danger.
my heart was pumping every single cell of blood at maximum speed in my body.
I had always been a nice athlete and for this reason I was confident about my speed...yet

It wasn't enough...

"I won't reach her"
I thought while the world around me slowed down

I wasn't enough

"why I'm so powerless"
I asked myself not ready to see an innocent I couldn't protect

I prepared for the worst.

but fortunately I didn't have to.
because Hikigaya faster than I ever could threw away the precious silver briefcase and the trolley he held in his hands to run towards the kid.
his movements were fluid and lightning fast, he dashed between the car and the kid, that couldn't have been more than 8 and

(HE STOPPED THE CAR BARE HANDED PARASYTE STYLE...no)

spinning on himself he caught under his left arm the little girl, put his right hand on the hood of the car and pushed himself away with the kid.
*tung
they crashed on the ground with a dull sound

"HIKIGAYA! "
I screamed reaching him and the girl that had began to cry

"I'm fine don't be so loud"
he said standing up and brushing off some dust.

I must say that for a moment I was taken aback
this was the first time Hikigaya Hachiman had talked to me without a quiet veil of politness

"Hey kiddo"
he grunted shaking the girl in his arms while a small crowd gathered around him.
the friends of the girl, the driver of the car and a few people of every age that came out from the houses around the street.
They had probably been alarmed by my scream

" Oi kiddo if you're not hurt tell me where otherwise stop crying"
Hikigaya asked the child like some kind of general

"waaaaaa"
responded the child volubly

"okay Hikigaya he was scare-"
I tried to peacefully approach the situation

*dsk ( silence Imotou chop)

yet I was cut off by the sound of Hikigaya's hand karate chopping the head of the kid

"Ouch oni-san!"
finally talked the kid still

"are you hurt?"
asked no...demanded an answer Hikigaya in a strange fashion...it was like he was anxious, but calm at the same time

"N-n-no"
stuttered the child

"SO why. are. you .still. crying."
continued Hikigaya making the girl brush hes reddened eyes (that for some reason were always nearly closed) with the sleeves of her jacket.

"good"
the dead-eyed boy muttered softing his voice to an incredible level...
for some reason it reminded me of a spoon filled of golden honey, sweet but truly enjoyable only if accompanied by something bitter like dark chocolate

"so what's your name Ojo-chan?"

"Nanaki Moriyama"
the girl with strawberry blonde hair responded stil sobbing a little bit.

"Moriyama...Moriyama I know this surname"
I thought trying to connect the surname to a face

"Moriyama...uh it seems familiar"
muttered Hikigaya as if reading in my mind

(WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Shiro's internal screams)

"Now Nanaki-chan...apologize"
Hikigaya intimated with that strange voice of his

"Uh?"
gasped the girl

"I said apologize to the driver-san he nearly got a heart attack because you chased the ball without thinking"
he explained while voices of protests raised from the crowd

"she is just a girl"
or
"is he serious?"

they said annoying the shit out of the dark haired teenager that was ready to snap

"HEY IF YOU CAN SPAT YOUR OPINIONS NO STOP MAYBE YOU CAN FIND SOMETHING ELSE MORE USEFUL TO DO!"
I roared dispersing the crowd and leaving on Hikigaya quite the expression;

It was a bizzarre cocktail of surprise, irony and satisfaction that turned out to be the most creepy grin I ever saw.

"Now what are you going to do Nanaki-chan?"
asked the teen in what I just named "big brother mode"

the girl in response moved aside from my schoolmate and walked towards the driver of the car;
A tall foreign man with brown hair of medium length and eyes hidden under a pair of sunglasses

"I'm sorry for what happened sir, I wasn't paying attention"
the girl said with timid voice

"no problem just be more careful"
responded the man in perfect japanese taking out from his car a yellow can and giving it to the girl

"and take this as my apologize, also I had to be more careful"
he smiled and moved his eyes towards Hikigaya.

his expression froze for a moment.
it didn't last more than a blink of an eye, but I clearly saw it.
that man had seen something that shocked him

"Thanks to you too young man"
said the man returning to his prius and throwing another yellow can to Hikigaya

"a small compensation for your service!"
he said turning on the engine of the car.

"that man...He seems familar.
probably someone I fought against during the last "eggs 50% off day" at the supermarket."
I told myself staring at him on his black car

"he is strange"
I thought

that man emitted strange vibes I couldn't define.
I just know that when his car passed in front of me I heard a telephonic conversation

"we have a Stein Gate problem"
"WHAT DID YOU DO TO THE MICROWAVE BRAT!?"

I might have spent a bit more of my time to think what the hell a Stein Gate was, but

"UNIVERSE YOU LOVE ME"
Hikigaya began to roar raising the yellow can he just received.

It was Max Coffee

---

After the suspicious man went away, the situation suddenly became quieter.

Hikigaya send off the little girl with a few little recomandations
and I went to fetch his stuff

"well let's start with the silver briefcase"
I said reaching it and...damn I had never observed it carefully.

at first sight it might seems an usual briefcase like all the other used by salary men, but the insane amount of keyholes and numbered rolls suggested otherwise.

"maybe I can trace it and see what's inside
naaaa it's not my business
but just a bit of magic...
No Shiro no"
I thought fighting against temptation.

once I finally won against my impure desires I leaned forward and took the small luggage.

*ugh
I grunted ...that thing weighted a ton

"thank you Emiya"
said Hikigaya snaching that silver atrocities from my hands

"No dude thanks to you...how could you carry that thing since we left the school"
I asked while my spine reassumed a natural form.

"my masochist side"
he smirked

"this answer makes much more sense than it should"
I retorted grinning

"it seems I owe you an apology Emiya"
Hikigaya said after a small pause

"why ?"
I asked confused fixing my amber eyes in his stone gray ones

"because I misjudged you"
he simply said with his bored tone

"I thought you were a filthy Riajuu, goody two shoes, unable to take anybody's side because you're scared of making decisions and... with an endless list of girls that will give you chocolate in the next days"
he said in one go.

"That's quite an harsh and detailed judgment you came out with...in less than a day"
I said bewildered by the great amount of scorn Hikigaya had towards me.

"That's why I apologize...I was surprised when you made shut up those guys before...
I thought you were another Hayama Hayato
basically the description from before was his one."
he explained tilting his head

"I'm pleased to see I was wrong"
he concluded with an half assetted grin

"you really judge fast people uh?
how can you tell I am not any of the things you said before"
I asked a little annoyed by Hikigaya's behaviour

"first he insult me...kinda
and then he speaks like he knows everything about me"
I thought realizing that he probably was the first person that annoyed me just for his personality.

A feat even Shinji never managed to achieve

"first I judged you in base of my pure prejudices,
Now I'll judge in base of your actions"
He said cryptically

"So...this is Hikigaya Hachiman..."
I said carefully while the whole identikit I had in my head.

the identikit of a lazy boy that passively moved in the world

disappeared

"What do you mean?"
he said beginning to square me with his eyes

that I just realized were yes dead but...far from dull as I thought
those grey orbs...they weren't dull, they were sharp, the sharpest I ever seen.

It was like I had just stared at the scabbard of katana until now, without even looking at the blade or its edge

right now in Hikigaya's eyes there was a light I only saw once in Kiritsugu's eyes.
it was difficult to see it
but It was definitely there
a spark of determination covered by the eye bags of countless sleepless nights

"This precise way of talking, your quick wits when you jumped in front of that car and the care you displayed for that girl"
I began while an ocular katana was pointed on my throat

"those were things I didn't thought you were capable of"
I explained realizing that just like him I had judged too soon

"I thought you were a selfish loner that acted only for his own benefit...it seems I have to apologize as well"
I said simply beginning with a sour voice and ending with a plain one

"That's quite an harsh and detailed judgment you came out with...in less than a day"
he said bewildered by the great amount of scorn I had towards him.

"That's why I apologize...
I was surprised when you threw away your precious ( and goddamn heavy) briefcase in order to run to save the girl...
(and because you were fucking faster than me, none is faster than Shiro Emiya)
I thought you were another Shinji Matou
basically the description from before was his one."
I explained tilting my head

"I'm pleased to see I was wrong"
I concluded with an half assetted grin

"you really judge fast people uh?
how can you tell I am not any of the things you said before"
he asked a little annoyed

"first I judged you in base of my pure prejudices,
Now I'll judge in base of your actions"
I said cryptically.

"and now we just had the same conversation twice"
both of us thought as we stood beside the street near my home.

we entered in a stalemate in which none of us knew what to do

for me It was the first time I spoke so honestly to a person I just met.
I wasn't sure on what to do

"we really likes to categorize people uh?"
suddenly Hikigaya broke the silence between us

"Yeah it makes easier to act around them"
I replied aware that for the first time in my life I didn't know what to think about a person.

"wanna start with the right foot?"
I timidly asked raising my shoulders

"why not"
he responded raising his hand

"Nice to meet you my name is Emiya Shiro, I like archery, cooking, I'm not good with casual conversation and to remain quiet"
I said shaking his hand

"the pleasure it's mine, my name is Hikigaya Hachiman I like books, videogames and silence. I'm cynical, a loner and awkward around people... but I also have flaws"
he said hinting a smile

"And from what I have seen you're good with kids"
I added

"well after all I'm a world level oni-chan"
he responded over-seriously

"okay..."

*growl

protested our stomaches

"Hey Emiya I know we're having a moment right now... but I'm fucking starving"

"you raise a fair point Hikigaya"

---

and so the bizarre relationship between Emiya Shiro and Hikigaya Hachiman officially began.
both of them didn't know what think about one another
none of them could understand if he liked the other or not.
but
they were sure of one thing

IT WAS THE FIRST TIME THEY MET SOMEONE SO EASY TO BE HONEST WITH

whenever they ended up getting along or hating each other was yet to be decided.
still
as a powerful curiosity pushed the two teens to know each other a small and indestructible string bounded them

THAT STRING WAS NAMED FATE

---

" did I just heard an omnious narrating voice?"

"What?"

"nothing Emiya I'm just imagining things"

"ok...now welcome to my home"
I quietly said pointing at the Emiya household

"..."

"something is wrong?"

"...are you perhaps rich?"

"eh no (until I get unlimited access to Kiritsugu's savings)"

"then how do you explain the Japanese manor you're pointing at"
he retorted widing his eyes

"do you want to eat or not?"
I asked slightly annoyed

"please lead the way".

(10 minutes later)

"here is the bathroom, there outside is the dojo and this is your room"
I said finishing to explain the layout of my house

"I don't like to be monotonous, but are you rich?"
Hikigaya asked again astonished by the might of my home

"ah finally that all knowing air of yours is gone"
I thought pleased

"please leave your stuff here and look around your room.
I will go to get change and start cooking, Fuji-nee...I mean Fujimura-sensei will be here soon"
I said ignoring the dark haired boy's question.

and so stopping to carry Hikigaya's trolley I took my leave.

"well maybe this cohabitation won't be so bad"
I muttered reaching my room.

it was pleasant after a long day enter on of the only places I felt as MY own.
inspiring the familiar scent off my house I lied down on my futon and began to purposeless stare at the ceiling.
for one blissful moment I closed my eyes and let my brain turn off

"."

".."

"..."

"okay I have to do something I can't remain still"
I thought snapping my eyes open

"what should I do?
what should I do ?

Training?
no still too risky I don't know Hikigaya's habit

Cooking?
not yet Fuji-nee has to bring the ingredients for the Welcome hot-pot

Relax...

Nope"
I wondered until an idea came from the depths of my brain.

(twenty seconds later)

*pop
*pop
*pop
*pop
(to be clear is the bubble wrap)

"this is life"
I said squeezing my anti-stress.

---

"SHIRO HIKIGAYA I'M HERE!"
Fuji-nee announced herself in her usual fashion...

(the kind of fashion that made your ears beg for mercy)
"welcome back"
I said to her coming out from the kitchen.

"I have bought all the necessary to party"
she exclaimed rising three bags, so full of meat, vegetables, beer and drinks that were about to explode.

"good evening Fujimura-senseeee is there something I need to know?"
said Hikigaya arriving in the entrance of the home and switching topic at mid-sentence

"Well me and Fuji-nee...I mean Fujimura-sensi thought to give you a welcome party...but"
I indulged my eyes on the supermarket my guardian brought at home

"Things get a little out of hand?"
concluded Hikigaya rising an eyebrow.

"I don't understand what you're talking about the doses are perfect"
complained Fuji-nee

"Aren't we only in three?! all that stuff can feed an army"
retorted Hikigaya

"I bet he is thinking how much can Taiga eat"
I thought studying the teenager's face

"The answer is more than you can imagine"
I muttered taking the three bags with me in the kitchen.

---

Separating me from the world of common people I reached my kingdom (the kitchen)
the only things I could perceive were smell of the ingredients and their texture.
with precision and speed I prepared the sauce

THEN my cooking knife went

tac*
tac*
tac*

as I cut each ingredient in the most appropriate shape: Meats, noodles, mushrooms and everything else my honed skill let no escape to anything.

"No please Shiro-sama, why you do this to us"
they begged

"...because I'm a chef ingredients-san"

"so that how it ends for us "

"I'm sorry but...yes"

"...will you transform us in a perfect dish?"

"I swear on my honor"

"then go ahead we are ready"

*tac

---

"so you're telling me than whenever he cooks or repair something...Emiya begin to mutter in this way"

"Precisely, listen"

"...will you transform us in a perfect dish?"

"...really?"

"really"

"..."

"shall we dress the table"

"...okay"

"Oh I forgot to tell you another person is coming"

---

(thirty minutes later )

"finally
the hot pot is ready!"
I proudly announced

carefully balancing the the steaming pot in my gloved hands I took on the dining table my masterpiece

"it looks amazing sempai"
Sakura complimented me from behind my back

"thank you Sakura".

...

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA WHEN THE HELL DID SHE ARRIVE "
I internally screamed while my face remained completely normal

"Good job Shiro and Sakura you really had a great teamwork"
said Fuji-nee rising her inch and winking

"of course!"
responded sakura patting her left bicipite

"y-yeah we had?"
I responded uncertain

"what is she talking about...oh it was Sakura's hand the one I nearly cut before"
I realized while I had a small flashback

apparentely Sakura had arrived soon after I began to cook, she even introduced herself to Hikigaya...and I completly ignored her until now

"God I hope she didn't notice it"

---

Sakura's mind part 8

"he didn't realized I was here until now..."

---

"ittadakimasu"
all the people around the table said letting the dinner begin

the atmosphere was lively...so much that even Hikigaya we he thought none was looking conceded himself to smile.

"When you said your hobby was cooking I didn't thought you where so good, (almost Megumi's level)"
he said after swallowing a mouthful of food

"did I just heard a challenge"
I thought

"Right Right the little Shiro is the best when it comes to cooking and cleaning"
exclaimed Fuji-nee with her third empty can of beer in her hand

I hoped she didn't decide to get drunk in front of Hikigaya and Sakura

"also cleaning..."
Hikigaya asked with a tone between the surprise and the tease

"yes yes have you seen a single particle of dust in this old fashioned japanese house?"
nodded the tiger

"and Hikigaya-sempai, you have yet to try sempai's cakes!"
added cutely Sakura

"O-oh r-eally now I'm curious"
Hikigaya responded uneasy

"well I guess I can bake one, after all I promised to cook Sakura's favorite dishes this weekend.
What do you think if I do the one with fruit and cream"
I offered catching the hint my kohai sent me

"yippie!"
she cheerfully said

"oh and maybe I try to make a sweet coffee dressing for you Hikigaya, you like coffee right?"
My eyes began to shine while an unlimited number of ideas springed from my cooking genius

"cooking and cleaning
You truly are the king of house-husbands"
the dark haired teen told me smirking and bowing his head

"Hikigaya what are you talking about?"
I asked confused

"all hail to the king of house-husbands"

"don't do a dogeza!
stop it!
Fuji-nee you're drunk!"

"My house-husband"

"what was that Sakura"

"Nothing!"

"Time to get my Max Coffee
have some quality time"

"What is that supposed to mean?!"

---

SEVEN DAYS AFTER

"So tell me Emiya it's been a week since the exchange student arrived
how is he?"
suddently said Issei introducing a precise topic in that cloudy friday lunch pause

"did Issei just asked information about another human being for a not school related matter"
an astonished part of my brain erupted.

from the shock I dropped the egg roll I had between my chopsticks (IT'S A SIGN OF INTENSE SHOOOOCKKKKKKKKKKKKK)

"Why you ask that now?"
I asked trying to keep a normal expression

I repeat "Trying"
judging from only my expression people might think I had just seen a donkey fly

"Is that strange that I ask news about a student of this school?"
he retorted angrily

"NO no no ...yes"
I honestly responded

"...fair
there have been a few rumors around him in the last week and some of them were quite bizarre.
I wanted to check, but Hikigaya apparently it's a master at disappearing.
And out of all people you're the only one that actually know him"
he explained

"okay now I get it"
I replied cleaning my mouth with a napkin.

"so what do you want to know?"
I asked assuming a slightly tense pose

after all in the past week I learned that whenever Hikigaya Hachiman was involved things tended to get...particular.
by that I don't mean he attracts problems... it's more like he exposes problems people always see but doesn't notice.
he is the spark that light a bonfire

"Let's begin with your personal opinions"

"Well Issei he is quiet, very quiet, extremely quiet,... he is basically a sloth
No
A bear,
A bear that is ready to go dormant "
I started with the most obvious thing

"So you confirm the rumor about his dozing during classes"
He asked me doing that bloody reflection thing with his glasses.

"I didn't know about that...but it sound very much possible
that man without his drink is doomed"
I said while a small smirk appeared to my face

"Uh?
his drink?"
the student president stared at me with inquisitive eyes.

"You remember that Hikigaya is REALLY into Max Coffee, that overly sweeten canned coffee"
I began looking at my nails

"yeah..."

" for you see-

---

flashback

"THERE IS NOT A SINGLE CAN IN THE WHOLE CITY!"
Hikigaya's voice roared in a commercial street

I was out for my usual saturday shopping and my new..frien...no no no no no
no my new acquaintance tagged along to look around the city

"calm down Hikigaya, how can be possible that there isn't a single can of your drink in the whole city"
I replied holding a bag with all the ingredients for my cake.

"I'd like to know as well!
I have visited 57 different shops and 5 wholesalers.
NONE OF THEM HAD A SINGLE CAN!
I will accuse signs of abstinence soon "

said Hikigaya gripping his head with both hands.

"Oi Hikigaya calm down people are staring at you"
I muttered with a strained smile

"besides It's just a drink you can survive without it"

...

---

"all the max coffee is gone, it's strange so?"
said Issei

"He couldn't"

"What? he coudn't what?"

"survive without that drink"

"uh?"

---

FLASHBACK

"Fuji-nee go call Hikigaya the lunch is ready"

"Aye!"

step

step

step

"HikigayAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Fuji-nee!"

step
step
step

"Shiro why is Hikigaya on the floor!?"

"How can I know it was you who found him"

"how can you be so quiet
but most important...Is he dead?"

"why are you so dark?
and no I don't think so"

"how can you tell?"

"he is drooling on the floor"

---

"he did what!"

"you heard me Issei, he fell asleep on the floor of the hallway."

"WHY?"
outbursted Issei

"well from what I have seen Hikigaya sleep very little and without his daily dose of sugar and caffeine he just..."
I said uncaring and pointing my index to issei at the end of the sentence

"falls asleep randomly"

"precisely, you have no Idea how many attempts I have done till now to re-create that damn drink in the past few days,
but Hikigaya is all
It's not MAX"
I said opening and closing my hand to imitate Hikigaya answers

"..."
Issei did a strange expression

"What? "

"you are sending contrasting signals Emiya"

"Uh why?"

"because you just told me, how you try to re-create his favorite drink yet you moved your hand to mock him.
Do you like Hikigaya or not?"
Issei asked at his wit's end

"bha I don't know he alterns moment in which he is very kind or really an asshole
or just is both kind and an asshole at the same time"
I said rising my shoulders...and yes it mostly the latter

"D-di-did you just insult a person"
muttered my friend while his face turned white

"if Asshole means what it means yes"
I retorted rising an eyebrow

"Why...you insult Hikigaya a kinda polite person
but you don't insult a jerk like Shikji Matou?"
Issei asked like he was trying to solve an equation

"well because-"
I started to say but...
I couldn't go on

I didn't know the answer to that question.

the words in my mouth ceased to exist
for a moment the air of the student council room froze

"That's right...

why?"

I muttered searching in my memories for an answer

---

The first memory that flashed in my mind was the evening of sunday.
outside was raining and I, fuji-nee and Hikigaya were having dinner, curry and to be precise.
I had turned on a small heater I used when the weather cooled down during the evening.
It was cheaper than turning on the whole heating system

"tell me Hikigaya what do you want to do as an adult?"
asked Fuji-nee trying to make conversation

"I want become an house-husband Fujimura-sensei"
responded quietly between a spoon of curry and another

"ahaha nice one! No really what you want"
laughed Fuji-nee overreacting

"I'm serious..."
retorted the boy without any kind of emotion

"O-oh...an house-husband don't you plan to become I don't know a journalist a teacher or...well you got the idea"
my sister was caught off guard

"naa to work is to lose "
he continued uncaring

"Okay...
kids now days have all weird dreams. Even you Shiro
didn't you want to become an hero of justice"
turned towards me that sorry excuse for an adult aware that I was easier to talk with

"Oi don't go around spitting out these embarrassing things"

"when he was a kid he was all so eager to become one, he wanted to make his father proud
ah how cute you were. The little Shiro aw"
that woman said ignoring my complains

"well, be hero of justice that's an interesting dream"
responded Hikigaya closing his eyes

"Don't pay attention to her Hikigaya she is just messing around with me "
I retorted sour

"yeah...but you didn't negate anything"
pointed out the boy as his eyes were unsheathed and my attention fully gained

"Being an hero of Justice...
a beautiful dream, difficult to find someone that genuinely wish to be one"
he continued fixing those sharp eyes on me.

"..Yeah"
I whispered while my heart twisted in strange positions

"unfortunately is also a stupid dream"
He finished sheathing his eyes back

"Well it might be childish but I don't think it's stupid as a dream"
I said to defend my hurt pride before the stare of a confused Taiga started to move between Hikigaya and me

"then let me rephrase it's not stupid but an ignorant dream."

"because being an house-husband is pure genius"

"well it's not a respected profession but it doesn't have any major flaws; you get an house, money and a family, there are no work shifts or world to save.
being an hero justice... a person that define himself like one is just deluding himself
after all justice changes from person to person.
good and evil may turn in one another through someone else's eyes.
I can accept being an hero, fight for the weaks and stuff. But being an hero of justice it just mean you assume you will always be right...it's arrogant"
He explained emotionless

yet I didn't know if it was to me or to himself.

"And what you do then if you have the best intention but end up doing something wrong, evil"
I asked curious about the harsh yet with an experienced sound opinion of the teen

"You just go on I suppose.
knowing you might be wrong, continue to question yourself if you are doing things in the right way...
that's the only thing you can do.
and if you still have un-answered questions but genuinely feel something is right...
Just do it"

"and how is that different from do something just because you assume to be right?"

"because this time the choice you make is not arrogant, it's a choice made after getting through doubts and uncertainties... it's genuine"

---

"I know my answer"
I thought while the time returned to move

"Issei I guess it's because I can't imagine what's going on in his head.
he always has got a strange vision of the world"
I responded to my friend's question.

I didn't know if I liked Hikigaya or not

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that he is able to find all the wrongs in what I believe is right and all the rights in what I believe is wrong.
He makes you realize your hypocrisies and explains that he is the same but...
while he realize and accepted that you have still to deal with it"
I explained

But I realized that getting to know him meant for some aspects get to know me

"he drags you down to his level and beat you with the experience"
he summarized leaving behind the whole character developement part

"pretty much,
if I don't insult Shinji it's because I know why he does what he does
I understand him"
I concluded

"I comprend...more or less
now in regards of all the other rumors... "
I heard Issei return to the original topic

"Oh right! Which rumors have been going on? "

"well first of all Hikigaya dozing during classes, but you confirmed that already...
so...did he receive chocolate from the idol of class B Nanami Moriyama?"
Issei began taking out from his pocket a...notebook?
something told me there was a certain number of rumors going on

"mmmm...Ah yes!
he received chocolate and it was delicious"
I responded after a meticulous reflexive pause

"Interesting"
muttered Issei scraching words on his notebook

the whole image was creeper than anyone would have ever expected...
I just the student president's pen did that rapid sound people hear in class during a test and he did the "thing" without hands

"Scaryyyyyyy"
I thought staring at him

but then he stopped writing and painfully slowly rose his head towards me.

"Emiya how do you know it was d-e-l-i-c-i-o-u-s ?"
Issei said taking off his glasses.

"W-why are you giving me that strange stare Issei? please stop!"
I muttered as the desire of running away appeared in my mind

"W-h-y Emiya?"

"Monday's-evening-I was-eating-all-the-disgusting-chocolate-I-recieved,-Hikigaya-helped-me-and-shared-with-the-chococlate-he-recieved-from Moriyama-san,-my-mouth was-so-tortured-everything-seemed-delicious-than-we-spent-the-rest-of-the-night-playing-chess-until-morning"
I said in one go
my lungs began to burn and my lips felt dry, just looking at Issei in this moment put me under an insane amount of pressure.

"perhaps do you know why Hikigaya received the chocolate in the first place?"

"HeSavedMoriyama'SSister"
I spitted out without thinking twice.

Issei today was scary beyond imagination, his eyes were hollow and that calm voice he kept using creeped me out.
I couldn't imagine why he would...oh

"Do you have a crush on Moriyama?"
I asked forgetting about my fears

the heavy mood in the room suddenly disappeared, like the cookies in my fridge when Fuji-nee is left alone

"W-wwwhat? me! Moriyama, no w-w-hy would you assume something like that?"
my friend responded caught off guard

"..."

"besides you said it was just obligatory chocolate right?
Right
next rumor
(*restless sound of pages turned on a note book, or for those who lack fantasy frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr)
here!
Hikigaya Hachiman caught an arrow in mid-air"
read Issei trying to escape from my inquisitive eyebrows

aaaaaaa it felt good to have the knife from the part of the handle this time

"Hikigaya visited the archery club, talked off Shinji that "slightly" angered threw on the ground the western bow on the club's wall, it had a arrow nocked, the arrow bounced on the ground, Hikigaya caught the arrow with a cool pose, end of the story
Returning to Moriyama what do you like about her?"
I said fast like a lightning in order to tease my friend sooner than I could

For the first time in my life I got to shake the agitated yet composed student president, It was a golden change that happened on time in a life and I must admit that the red shades on his cheeks were...fulfilling.

"her hair...I mean next rumor!
(*again that lovely sound of pages frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!)
Hikigaya Hachiamn has got three eyes...why did I write this down"
*Frrrrrrrrrrr
Issei continued

"yeah yeah try to hide behind those pages you want escape"
I thought staring my prey and controlling the instinct of grinning

unfortunately my control didn't exist so I just began to grin creeping

"I don't care about his one
*Frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
okay, found it and it's fairly recent
Hikigaya Hachiman beaten up Shinji Matou"
my friend said with a smile...he was a bit too amused by this rumor

"What? noo Hikigaya never could"
I retorted surprised

"Why do you say so?"

"too much effort"

"Uh?"

"remember when I said Hikigaya is quiet"

"yeah..."

"it was me being polite, he is just lazy, so lazy that he most likely would take a punch and leave rather than fight and win"

"...win? He doesn't look strong or anything...maybe a bit creepy"

"I know! But he is way fitter than you think!
for example yesterday I caught him reading a book"
I exclaimed

"Oh...I don't get what's strange here"
Issei didn't follow

"Standing on one hand"
I concluded reminding of the scene

---

Flashback

"good I managed to do a bit of magic training even with Hikigaya at home"

"good job Shiro"

"Thanks fridge-kun"

"I wonder what that guy is doing now...he is winning our chess competition"

(54 wins Hikigaya Hachiman, 53 wins Emiya Shiro, 63 Stalemates )

*step
*step
*step

(sound of a sliding door opening vshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh)

"Hikigaya you are going down!"

*sound of a surprised teen falling from a zen position...
it kinda sounded like this "What the fuaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh ck!"

---

"his face was too damn funny...what was going on? oh right Shinji beaten up"
I returned from my flashback

"Just to know, standing to the rumor when did Hikigaya beat up Shinji?"
I investigated

"eh this morning"

"Oh...Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhh this is the story going around?"
I gasped in surprise

incredible how much truth could be twisted in just a few hours, I was astonished and a bit amused; the loner Hikigaya Hachiman the new bully of Fuyuki, I could already see his face overly conscious of the people staring at his unaware self

"Hikigaya did not beat up Shinji, Shinji beaten up himself"
I opened my tale

---

Flashback

(that morning)

"Com'on Shiro it's friday, you can do it, just one day left"
I muttered dragging my feet in the kitchen

I was still wearing my pajama; a simple long sleeved T-shirt and pants white with vertical blue lines. The kitchen was quiet and warm despite the cloudy weather outside, my chess board was still on the dining table while a few pieces were scatter all around; yesterday night Hikigaya and I played till late night an habit we took after our first matches, the evening I had to consume all the chocolate I received before it could taste even worse.

"YOU REALLY ARE A RIAJUU! SON OF A BITCH WITH AN HAREM!"
he had said that time.

It took me a long explanation and a few terrible chocolates to calm him down and make say

"...You have it tough eh?"

"You understand!?
I had responded to him in a mix of joy, surprise and confusion

Now has to be said that Hikigaya never rubbed me off like the type of person who received Valentine chocolate, but...no nothing I couldn't understand why he could understand, until

"Well kinda...I know how it feels to receive unwanted thanks"
He had summarized the uneasiness I felt about that chocolate

then without another word he seated before me and helped to eat all that disgusting sweets, that time...it was the first occasion in which Hikigaya displayed a natural act of courtesy towards me, I didn't ask for it nor I ever would yet he did the only thing I really needed, I remember he muttered something along the lines of "the first time I would refuse free food" or "Yuigahama is there you".
that night we talked a lot and learned more about each other until both of us revealed our pride on the chess board, ten minutes later we were facing on a black and white battlefield. We played until morning accompanied only by the sound emitted by the old lights in my house and noises Hikigaya and I did eating the chocolate made by Moriyama-san, I wanted to ask Hikigaya if it was one of those unwanted thanks but my brain was more like "...hazelnuts...good".

concluding to remind the sweet gold day(s), I slowly put away all the chess pieces and began to cook breakfast, at first it was difficult I felt my eyes sticky and all the objects resembled each other but, as my synapses returned to work I started to display my usual prowess.
Ten minutes later two of the three guests I was waiting arrived

"Hello senpai! how are you today?"
cheerful as usual Sakura Matou

"Sup Emiya"
and gloomy as always Hikigaya Hachiman

"good morning you two"
I responded staring at them.

they were like the sun and the moon: Sakura was dressed in in her school uniform and her hair perfectly in order, while Hikigaya...
was in his morning mode; wearing a green track suit with hairs pointing in every possible direction and with gloomy eyes.

"Well he already seems more healthy than when he arrived here"
I thought squaring off the guy.

his eye bags had almost disappeared since he started living here, I thought it was thanks to at least six hours of sleep everyday, he also appeared more solid; if when I saw him the first time he looked like a frail boy I eventually came to notice he was more trained than I could imagine, he had broad shoulders and when his back wasn't bent he was probably taller than me...WHY THE HELL HE WAS TALLER THAN MEEEEEEEEEEE?!

"good morning Hikigaya-senpai"
greeted Sakura

"Y-yo, Matou-san"
Hikigaya responded with his usual uneasy tone.

He always walked on tip toes around Sakura. Then for some reason he started to walk around the dining room.

"Hey Emiya have you seen my PSvita?"
Hikigaya asked me

"you left it on the couch in the living...I guess you were saying something about a GODDAMN TEMPERED RATHLOS"
I boredly said without turning my head away from the food.

*stun
Judging by the that sound Hikigaya was gone.

"do you need any help Senpai?"
asked me Sakura hopping beside me like a cute little rabbit

"Sure
can you cut this salmon in stripes while I brew the tea?"
I said moving my eyes towards Sakura...that

that was a bit too close to my face, her violet eyes were staring at me with burning intensity, her tiny nose pointed at me and her delicate lips were binding my eyes in a magnetic field.

"Calm down SHIRO!
Impure thoughts fly away fly away"
I mentally screamed to get an hold on myself.

"Of course senpai... there is a-n-y-t-h-i-n-g else you want me to do?"
Sakura said in a strange fashion getting up on her tip toes and putting her index under her lips

"DAMMIT SAKURA GIVE ME AN HAND I'M ALREADY IN A TIGHT SPOT HERE"
I thought blushing to insane levels.

I had to repel all temptation and so I did the only smart thing I could came out with; I bit my tongue

*mfph
I grunted as the sharp pain I just inflicted myself relaxed me

"No Sakura, just the salmon is fine"

---

Sakura's mind part 9

"O' com on just take a hint already!
Isn't this pure girl play enough to make you fall!
I must found a bowl to drench myself with or what?

It's not a bad idea last time I got one of senpai's shirt ahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahah"

---

"Okay senpai"
the girl replied with a thin smile

and today I escaped again from a terrible foe...Sakura's lips

"so delicate and pink...
JUST WHAT THE HELL I'M THINKING"
I smashed my head against the first wall I saw

the only results: I got a terrible headache and Hikigaya that had just re-entered in the kitchen stared at me, at Sakura, at me again and Sakura...
and came out of the kitchen muttering
"this sound like not my business"

*stun

For two awkward not me nor Sakura said a single word, both of were wondering what to do next.
then Sakura said
"Senpai why Hikigaya-senpai always acts strangely around me?"

---

Sakura's mind part 10

"He saw through my mask didn't he, I saw how he looks at me...
his guard is too high, I can't deceive him.

I just hope he doesn't dare to say anything to my Senpai...or I will get angry

People
don't
like
when
I'M

ANGRY

oh senpai is doing his cool pose scratching his chin still in pajama! I have to burn this image in my memory

---

"Maybe you remember him someone.
Hikigaya has got a little sister and he seems pretty...extremely attached to her, he is probably trying to keep distance to avoid strange situation"
I responded to my cute kohai while brewing some tea.

"Really..."

Ten minutes later Fuji-nee entered in my home with her usual fashion, with my displeasure of my ears.
seeing the breakfast ready and Hikigaya still missing Fuji-nee did what Fuji-nee do...grabs a poster and runs in Hikigaya's room ready to become REVENGE

I was ready to hear the screams of a suffering teenager coming but...
the situation went differently

"HIKIGAYA!"

*tung

*swam

"uh? Sensei?"

"Don't hit me, I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry "

my eyes widened in shock, my lips began to tremble

"Did the Tiger Just...just"
I muttered in awe

"lose"
concluded Sakura for me, barely less surprised than I was.

a few moments later both Hikigaya and Fuji-nee came in the kitchen, Hikigaya was maintaining his usual attitude; bored and disinterested, on the other hand my sisterly figure wasn't acting like herself, her usual shining and cheerful fashion had disappeared, now she was just quiet and silent...

"Bless you Hikigaya magnificient bastard"
I glorfyed all kami

for the first time ever Fuji-nee wasn't being loud, shameless and wasn't chewing with her mouth open...
*chom
I retire the last one.

...

Still an amazing feat.

The rest of the breakfast went on without any problem until...

"Matou, Emiya what did you do to the back of your hand?"
Hikigaya asked an unexpected question

reaction to his words my eyes were suddenly directed towards Sakura's hand...there was a red bruise

"S-H-I-N-J-I"
I thought as a magmatic rage rose from my guts

Oh that was it! Shinji could be jerk towards me, could be a jerk towards Issei and Mitsuzuri and hell could be a jerk towards any other human being on the earth but, to his sister...NO
NO
and in a million years NO.

"Today is the day I finally snap...and is not even because Hikigaya...tecnically he pointed out the bruise so it's because him but WHO CARES!"
I told myself moving my hand towards Sakura's one to check her...but Sakura retracted from my touch

"I-it's fine Senpai, I just fell...beside you have a bruise too"
Sakura muttered lowering her voice and eyes

She was scared, I realized that but

Scared
of
What?

"well at least let's bandage your hands"
said Hikigaya cutting of the conversation.

He had already taken the first aid kit I kept in a corner of the kitchen; a small plastic box coloured in white and with green cross on.
I was uncertain on what to do, I wanted to ask again Sakura what did happen to her but, she didn't appear conformable with the idea
Forcing my body to abscond Sakura's wishes I stepped aside and reached Hikigaya, I rose my hand and studied for the first time the red bruise I had on me:
it was strange I didn't recollect slamming against anything in the past few days but...the form of the bruise was indeed peculiar it seemed like some kind symbol.

"Oi what are you doing Emiya?"
Hikigaya looked at me with empty eyes

"Uh, letting you do some first aid?"
I asked confused

"Ladies first!"
he brushed away my hand and gestured Sakura to come

The girl was caught in surprise, probably she didn't expected Hikigaya to act in that way.
after all Hikigaya had always behaved overly strange towards Sakura

"Okay..."
she whispered reaching the dark haired teen

"Let's see what you have here"
the boy muttered lightly grasping Sakura's hand

"Oh I know what's going to happen"
I muttered as I saw the future

Hikigaya Hachiman's oni-chan mode

"Nothing seems off but, it's bad for a girl of your age to fall and bruise your hand"
He said with that hypnotic and sweet voice.

"uumm"
Sakura muttered falling prey of that charm,

she slightly blushed and lowered her eyes looking at Hikigaya's skillful hands treating her hand, I didn't get what he was doing but I knew that I didn't like the way he was doing it...he was too mature?

(A/N ahahaha NTR)

"Did he just do that magic with a girl over ten years old? "
I wondered astonished and scared by the power of that mystical art.

"Thanks Hikigaya-senpai"
the girl whispered flustered once the bandaging was over.

"You're welcome but really...be more careful,
your hands are strong and frail at the same time, maybe you should think about entrust them to someone"
the dark haired teen said with his magic voice and moving his chin towards me...for some reason

needless to say Sakura reached new level of redness.

---

Sakura's mind part 11

"awawawawawawawawawaw
Entrust my hands to senpai (Marry him)

...but the Holy Grail
but senpai
and
...

What is Hikigaya-senpai doing with his voice it's...pleasant?

---

END FLASHBACK

---

"I get it Sakura Matou was bruised, Emiya can you just get to the point lunch break is ending "
Complained Issei interrupting the narration of my day

"Fine...
After also my bruise was treated the three of us left my home, we reached school and Sakura got ahead.
Hikigaya and I went towards our classes and met Shinji on the stairs..."

---

"Shinji did you hurt Sakura?!"

"Good morning to you too Emiya and I don't know what your talking about"

"the bruise on the back of her hand"

"That!...oh that, the idiot just fell down the stairs"

"Y-you.."

"Oh are you angry Emiya? but I wonder why, after all I didn't do a-n-y-t-h-i-n-g"

"Just let's go Emiya"

"Hikigaya?!"

"Right follow the advice of your boyfriend and move aside"

"Ah don't misunderstand Matou, I'm not doing it for him, I'm doing it because arguing with you it's a waste of time...
It sucks have an inferiority complex towards all your friends and siblings uh?"

"You bastard-AH?
Eh!
IH!
OH!
UH!
FUCK!

---

"So Hikigaya made Shinji feel like a bug then Shinji tried to hit him but, fell down the stairs?"
reassumed Issei for eventual confused readers

"Yeah basically...
Shinji fell pretty hard. Think that I have to clean the Archey Dojo to avoid major issues"
I said

"And Hikigaya is not going to help you?"
my friend asked

"Nope, after all the whole situation would have been avoided if I didn't talk to Shinji on the stairs"
I responded easy goingly

"Are you serious it was Hikigaya who provoked Shinji "
the student president retorted

"yeah but the situation would have eventually ended in the same way."

"you know there have been multiple murders in the past days you can't just remain at school till late and ...what do you mean by the same way
define please..."
asked Issei doing the thing

"You said Hikigaya made Shinji feel like a bug and then the following actions leaded to me cleaning the dojo but, if I had followed my plan till the end the result wouldn't have changed"
I answered looking at my nails

"And which was your plan?"

"I would have pretended to be sorry for arguing with Shinji, then he would have gotten cocky trying to make me snap, since we are talking about Shinji, he would have asked or ordered to clean the dojo in his place, I would have accepted with a smile and he would have started to feel like a bug in comparison with me"
I explained closing my bento, standing up and concluding the conversation

It was time to return in class I still had a few hours of lesson before I had to clean that damn Archery dojo but something unexpected happened

"ahahahahahahahah"
Issei began to laugh

"you and Hikigaya are really the same"
serious voice he said cryptically

"What do you mean I don't believe there are people more different than Hikigaya and I"
I retorted confused by the comparison

"you know for some aspects you two are like machines...doing things because you have to without a laugh or anything...until something gives you an input.
and you start to act.
both of you are really quiet people but your really observant, you notice the same things"
He continued

"..."

"but you act differently, Hikigaya realizing Shinji's inferiority complex stabbed him were it hurted the most, you on the other hand would have crushed Shinji acting in a superior way"

"I don't get what you mean, Hikigaya and I just wanted to defend Sakura, there is no need to search deeper meanings"
I said coming out of the room.

"Emiya, Hikigaya you don't laugh like normal people nor you cry like them yet when you're together you act like humans"

---

(seven Hours later)

"And now every single millimeter square of this dojo it's clean"
I proudly told myself

"That's right Shiro-kun you're the best at cleaning, only you know the right movements to polish every single corner of this place"
said to me sponge-chan

"You're too good sponge-chan, but you're right I'm the best"
I responed a bit embarassed by sponge-chan praise

"And It only took you four hours"
told me another (in)animate object

"You're right water basket-kun...Ara four hours !"
I exclaimed

I rushed out of the dojo and saw a pitch black sky

"damn my perfectionism! I'm too late Hikigaya must be worry"
I muttered checking my phone

-0 missed call-

"or maybe not"

*CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Suddently a sonic boom resounded in my ears, it came from the school's courtyard.

Now any sane person would have just run away after hearing that sound, but I...am not sane
So forcing my heart to slow down I sneaked in the directions of the "explosion".
in that moment each step I took was accompanied by the sound of weapon clashing and battle roars, all my senses screamed me to run away, that I was going in front of something dangerous yet another visceral instinct suggested me otherwise.
A muscular man wearing a blue armor(?), wielding an ominous red spear and a tanned man wearing a red cape, wielding two beautiful black and white twin swords fighting against one another.
that was the image I saw when I finally reached the courtyard.

*clang

*clang
*clang

their weapons collided against one another resounding in the night

It was incredible, they were incredible their speed power and technique.
the two men fighting in front of my eyes were something beyond human comprehension, they were so fast that my amber orbs couldn't keep up with their movements as shining arcs of death were spread across the courtyard while the red spear and the twin swords each time they clashed roared like a thunder.

then for some reason the two men that had fought on equal ground till now, reached a stand off both of them stopped to move and facing each other they began to talk, I couldn't hear a single word.
for a moment silence returned to rule over the night but it didn't last long because the red spear of the blue man started to flare up an insane amount of mana.
Apparently the red man had said something wrong and the situation was going to go south...really south...so south that could be counted as north.
the mana waves coming from the red spear were absurd I have never felt such a power and so

"what are they?"
I muttered unconsciously.

Probably the worst move of my life

"who talked!"
screamed with rude voice the blue man staring at me

(MOTHERF***ER WITH ONE HELL OF A EARING)

3

2

1

SHITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!

---

*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step

I was running

*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step

I was running away from something that was beyond my comprehension

*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step

I was running across my school

*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step*step

I slowed down my run to see if I was being chased

*step *step *step

None was chasing me.

*step

I stopped to move.
I was unable to remember if what I just saw was only an hallucination

"hey there"
a manly voice called me

*sound of a f***ing gaebolg piercing an heart

"Arg"
I grunted as my mouth was filled with blood and a painful shock shaken my whole body

I had a spear in my heart.
my vision began to blurry.
I felt the spear being removed
without any kind of hold...I fell on the ground
warm blood drenched my school uniform.

my eyes started to feel heavy, incredibly heavy...I wondered why, I was just very very sleepy

"today wasn't your lucky day, well now that you have seen me, you have to die, dead men tell no tales, and all that.
Curse with your dying breath that you were born with no luck and no power"
Said the same voice that called me before...I couldn't understand what was happening my brain had just stopped working.

and so warmed by own blood I fell asleep

---

THE HOMUNCULUS I

"Saturday, I love Saturdays everything that I love the most comes out on saturday: anime, new manga's chapters, my day off at work and I finally have time to play with my nintendo...until Jeanne wakes up... why can't she understand that Pokemons are not blasphemy"
I thought opening my eyes.

I was in my soft double bed, light cotton blankets were covering my half naked bod- *achooo

"Right still winter... I should stop using the Fullbuster style"
I muttered passing my index under my nose.

"cold cold cold"
I endlessly repeated searching for the wool blankets.
I had goose bumps as my desperate research for the Onepie...for my blanket remained fruitless...*achooo I sneezed again.

My room was too dark, it was early and despite the open curtains the only light shining in the room was the one of my alarm

5:59

"ok still 36 minutes too early to wake up besides I can't move my legs..."
I whispered while my eyes got used to the darkness

...

6:00

"where is the bloody blanket?!"
I thought returning to search my treasure

I was seriously beginning to freeze, maybe I should have just gotten up and turned on the light, or wore a shirt...or anything smart, but I wasn't exactly a morning homunculus so my mind didn't work properly. So after another attempt to find my blanket I gave up and remained immoble on my bed while my head sinked in a soft pillow.

6:01

"really where did it fall"
I muttered as I stopped to worry about the cold and started to worry about the thing that I hate the most.

silence

6:02

for a full minute I ignored the cold and closed my eyes trying to fall asleep again. Yeah trying unfortunately for me my subconscious had other plans

"It's nostalgic uh"
a voice inside my brain told me

that voice...was like claw made of ice crawling on my back, I didn't want to hear what it said so I just began to roughly inspire and expire the lavender perfumed air of the room.

"This silence"
the voice continued

* ah eh ah eh
I respired faster

"this loneliness"

and faster

"it's like your native place"

and faster

"Right S.I.E.G.1"

for some reason all the air stopped to move in my body, I couldn't respire anymore my breath died in my lungs.

"no, no no"
I grunted trying to regulate my breathing. Unfortunately I just kept switching from hyperventilation to hypoventilation
"No g-good"
I whispered while memories of my damn glass prison appeared in front of my eyes,day after day, after day

"Aren't you a replaceable being?"
the cursed voice in my head continued

"S-s-stop"

"Isn't nostalgic this silence"

"please stop"

"Why are you so afraid of remaining alone?"

and that was it, the voice broke through all my defences, I couldn't stay in this silence anymore;
I had to get out, hear some music, watch an anime, read something, train ANYTHING I JUST HAD TO ESCAPE FROM THIS SILENCE.
pushed by my visceral desire of running away I forced my legs to move, but I couldn't...I just realized they were entangled with something. Something slender, smooth and-

" eheh I'm not alone"
I calmly said making the voice and those awful...frightful...terrible, Boku No Piko (Now you get the idea of how mess up I was feeling) memories stop.

6:03

then like nothing was wrong I turned to my right and extended my arms towards my one and only wife bringing her closer to me,

"So that's were the blanket was"
I thought while I embraced Jeanne's body...that woman, always pulling away the blankets from me...

"time for the payback"
I whispered in her ear once her body was pressed against mine.

I couldn't describe how Jeanne's warmth and her lavender perfume calmed my heart. I Filled my lungs with her fragrance and to get a bit of revenge I decided to tease a bit this wool thief, so began to lightly bite her earlobe

"mmmffff..."
began to mutter the blonde woman pressing her body more against mine.

(Sieg's brain waves MOEMOEMOEMOEMOEMOEMOEMMOEMOEMOE MY WAIFU IS SO MOE MOE MOE
Sieg's doctor "What the fuck is wrong with this encephalogram!?" )

Jeanne's attractive figure remained completely enveloped in my arms, we completed each other...and by that I mean that while I was only wearing pants she was wearing only a shirt, for a long five minutes I continued to tease my wife's ears and neck enjoying her cute grumblings and the feeling of her soft chest pressed against mine.
Sincerely said it was a good thing my wife was insanely hot, being an homunculus and stuff kept me from having a strong desire of reproduction or other basal instincts but, with Jeanne being Jeannne I could easily overcome those handicaps...

"NO REACTION... I see this body of mine doesn't want to move"
I thought after checking that all the skinship I was having didn't make my body more...bonier

"oh well it's still pleasant"
I muttered hinting a smile while Jeanne unconsciously put her arms around my neck.

"nnnn...ice-cream"
I heard Jeanne mutter with her usual musical voice.

"That's the holy maiden Jeanne d'arc for you, such a glutton "
I whispered as that voracious woman started to list an insane amount of foods

it was something that could warm even my dragonic heart, watch this woman mutter about what she wanted to eat, or anything else so trivial; It was the proof that her who had always fought and lived for the others was finally leading her own life

"both of us want to make out the most from the second change have, right Ruler?"
I whispered gently moving away Jeanne's arms from my neck.

"don't escape donut"
the blonde woman said hugging tightly my pillow

so like that I got up from my bed

*sqeeek
"damn this noisy bed"

and came out from the bedroom, while my wife was Biting? a pillow and the first sunrays of the day shaped the shadows of the room.

---

The first thing I did after waking up was, switch on the radio for that day I had enough of creepy hallucinating silents. I didn't particularly cared which broadcast resounded in the living of my attic, yes attic those that poor people will never be able afford (A/N Like me!...*depression), placed in skyscrapers, 90% of the walls are windows, all the furniture has some kind of purposelessly roundish design and everything...I mean EVERYTHING is or black or white or is made out of some prehistoric wood.
THAT kind of attic where everything is so uselessly expensive that only thinking about breaking something makes your wallet cry in terror.

"And that's why Assassin will never buy an apartment again"

With some english song in the background I headed towards the kitchen and prepared my breakfast; a bowl of milk and Cheerios. Then i took a seat on the sofa and searched for an anime to watch, it was an hard decision but I ended up with watching psycho-pass.
Two episodes, 50 minutes, 3000 seconds, the time I granted myself to progress with this series that I had to dig out from the black hole know as "List Of Anime To Watch".

"Just how am I supposed to keep up with all this new realises"
I muttered turning off the television

It was 7:10, Jeanne would have woken up soon, so I just did the only thing that saves my artificial body from supplying a beautiful female servant with all my mana...take out from the fridge enough food to feed ten people. Cured meat, eggs, fruit, yogurt, toasted bread, butter and jam, all the things my wife usually have for breakfast were put on the table by my callous hands.

"Okay this can suffice...or not...ehehe, better if I prepare myself to be dried up"
I muttered staring at that feast that could save from starvation God know how many people, but couldn't fill Jeanne's stomach.

I didn't have to wait for long before my goddess with morning hair came out the bedroom rubbing her eyes, moving her sleepy, naked feet on the floor Jeanne reached my side, kissed my cheek and muttered some kind of goodmorning (ahdgsjfmorning). Morning Jeanne was really a mess uncombed, matted and incapable to speak sentences with complete meaning but, it was when she was like this that I liked her the most; It was the complete opposite of the angelic valkyrie I first met all those years ago, yet exactly because she didn't look like an otherwordly beauty but like the woman I loved, my apathetic heart could still wince at her sight.

"Good morning to you too"
I said embracing her from behind

Incapable to say anything except bits of words my wife caressed my right hand making our small golden rings tinkle against one another.

"..."
Jeanne quietly stared at me

"what?"
I gently asked

she then touched my left hand...the one that sometimes acts on his own...to be clear...was, how should put it, groping her

"fulness... Oh that!"
I said surprised unwilling to move

"Don't mind it "
I added sinking my face in her collarbone

Thank my dysfunctional body, I was finally having some Reaction, but after Jeanne's stomach began to grumble...I lost the mood, Dammit. So I released her from me and let her assault the table.
It was one sided massacre the food had no change of surviving.

---

"So Whaw aawe youw plans fwr toway"
Jeanne muttered brushing her teeth

"grrararararararararar pwa wake up Assassin and scout around the city to find clues about the other servants, almost everyone has already been summoned"
I responded rinsing my mouth

"Be careful, otherwise I will have to save you like a dame in distress and then punish you for worrying me...can you pass me the dental floss"
my wife said winking

"aw you're so cute when you go all deredere and favor me in the holy Grail war, here the floss"
I retorted coming out from the bathroom.

"I'm not all Deredere, I mean I don't favor you in the War, I'm just... "

"being my cute tsundere Waifu"
I suggested

"YES wait no"

"Yes you are, and we are out of milk"
I finally stepped away

*step
*step
...

*backstep
*backstep

"By the way...love ya too"
I excused myself with just my neck in the room

"SIEG!"
furiously blushed Jeanne, awww she was still so pure.

and so I walked away from my blonde goddess congratulating myself for escaping the troublesome Holy Grail War topic.
"Now let's find the old man"
I muttered while all the hormones capable of make me feel emotions disappeared from my bloodstream.

all the feelings that made me smile a minutes ago turned into nothingness and just like that I returned to my usual self; quiet, calculative, empty, sarcastic and ready to spout "it's a mother****ing jojo's reference.

---

It wasn't like I was now without emotions, it's just nothing was worthy of them..
I was like Rei Ayanami, I have feelings maybe smaller than other people ones but they definitely exist, the problem lies in my incapacity of addressing them. practically every person inspire in me some kind of emotion, sometimes it burns, sometimes it's urticating and other times I can't simply define it. Given that it takes me a lot of time to figure out what I'm feeling usually I just ignore them and keep a polite attitude...like the people that work in a costumer care, they don't give a shit about your problem but act politely and do their job; like I do with strangers...I might be cold but at least I don't prejudge.
Unfortunately my wife and servant do not like I "bottle my emotions away", like my heart was a wine shop, I don't bottle up emotions I ignore them until they disappear...It's easier...and doesn't require a bottle I can't find even on amazon. So to keep them quiet I do another thing, I give a word just one, it's the first step I take to start a relationship...for example Jeanne is LIGHT because she shines for me (corny), it's pure, sometimes blinding...hot and only after you find the right instrument you can discompose her and see all her colours and shades.
In some way my word giving strategy is a bit narrow minded, after all you can't reduce a person to a single word, but it's a great help when I have to deal with acquaintances or people that to me will never be more than a word.
I just hope Jeanne and Hachiman Don't discover it, I know they will worry and pretend I get past this naive form of categorization but first I'm freaking nine and second It's really a problem to desire only two or three genuine relationship, I have already a strange father and a loving wife what I can desire more...I wonder if a servant and a homunculus can procreate?

---

*tac

I turned on the light switch

"and there was light...a line from the bibble Jeanne would be so proud"
I muttered entering in my old man's bedroom

It was a small room, (pretty messy in my opinion) it was orange, smelling of old paper and 70% of the furniture were bookshelves or other objects capable of containing books.

Maybe someone haven't realized it yet but...
Assassin really liked books..(A/N*gasp)...and I liked them too..(A/N double gasp)..it was just that, to me 1300 books in 8 different languages were a bit...too much, who was I kidding! It's definitely too much, he spent tens of thousands yen each month in books; the only thing that stopped me from cutting off Assassin allowance was that... I expended nearly the same amount of money in figures without Jeanne's consent.

Assassin knew it and blackmailed me ...jerk.
I had already hold back my desire to buy a 1: 100 model of a Gundam.

"Why he can keep his collection of books in his room, but I can't display all my figures in mine"
I sulked walking beside Hachiman's bed.

the floor was carpeted of news papers and maps, Hachiman had worked no stop to find all the information possible about the Servant that have already been summoned.

"restless as usual eh"
I said eyeing the siluette of my servant under the blankets of his bed

"okay time to give the cool speech you have prepared for the last nine years Sieg, the scenario is not the one you wanted but or now or never."
I told myself and so

*shhriinnnnn"
with a single movement I opened the dark blue curtains of the room, warm sunrays invested the dustyiest room of the attic, Now not even the mighty shield made of wool could hide all that light from Assassin.

"mmmmnnffffffffff"
he grunted

so I SIEG, enveloped in the light of the morning, while all the dust particles in the room shone like small diamonds, rose my tattooed hand towards the sky. Then in my usual white shirt and black pants I began the best motivational speech ever.

speech program ACTIVATE

"So after nine long years the Holy Grail War has finally began"
Now clench fist and slowly move it in front of the eyes

"You have trained me and we prepared for this war more than anyone else."
close eyes with intensity and bend knees like a burden had just been placed on shoulders

"The battle now claim us"
slowly rise

"So as you one and only Master I ask you!"
stand proud, open eyes and point at the servant with the hand with the command seals

"are you ready Assassin?"
wait for applauses, congratulation you have concluded your awesome speech.

"eehmmm yeah...still five minutes"
Muttered my useless servant

suddenly I felt thousands of capillaries break in my brain

"he didn't hear a word did he..."
I thought while small tear-drops ran on my face.

[casual watcher eyes-"HE is crying blooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooodddd"-]

my pride was hurted, I had worked for a long time on that speech and and...HE DIDN'T HEAR A SINGLE WORD.
He had offended my feeling...He must be punished, so I did the only thing a sister type characters always do right in anime.

"get out of that bed HACHIMAN"
Wake up an older idiot

"Brat what the fuaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaak"

*sound of a servant smashed on the floor by a judo throw"

---

(ten minutes later and half hour of Cruel Angel Thesis to calm down Sieg)

"Once more..."
I said staring to a sleepy old man with a IV in his eyes

speech program ACTIVATE

rose my tattooed hand towards the sky

"So after nine long years the Holy Grail War has finally began"
Now clench fist and slowly move it in front of the eyes

"You have trained me and we prepared for this war more than anyone else."
close eyes with intensity and bend knees like a burden had just been placed on shoulders

"The battle now claim us"
slowly rise

"So as you one and only Master I ask you!"
stand proud, open eyes and point at the servant with the hand with the command seals

"are you ready Assassin?"
wait for applauses, congratulation you have concluded your awesome speech.

"yeah yeah, I'm ready... explain me again why we are on top of a skyscraper"
Assassin responded in a bored fashion while his breath condensed in the air.

"because it's cool"
I stated in serious voice

"yes in fact I'm freezing let's go to Jeanne"
retorted that old man still wearing his white with red hearts pajama

"you're no fun"
I groaned

"yeah things that happens, like being thrown away from my bed to go to freeze my balls early in the morning"
He said rising his shoulder and moving towards the exit

"AW fine I'm sorry...for not having beaten you up more"
I retorted annoyed by the dark man with terrible taste in pajamas

"Did I just hear a lack of respect brat"
Assassin slowly turned his eyes on me, his deadly creepy eyes

"Oh...damn, I triggered him. I must not stare his eyes or I will be under his genjustu"
I told myself aware that I could start to burn in a black flame in a matter of seconds.

"NOooooooo how could I talk to you without respect"
I said to save my artificial ass, unfortunately the fear alternated my voice so I sounded sarcastic

for a few seconds the world seemed to have stopped moving, the only sound resounding on that roof was the howl of the wind...and some random dude that was late for work and couldn't find his keys.
Exactly the time I needed to finish my testament, it was a single line [ I DO NOT POSSES ANY VINTAGE HENTAIS, IF SOMEONE FIND THEM THEY ARE NOT MINE]

*crunch
Assassin cracked his fists
I was so dead

"Hey brat I just decided that our daily spar is gonna be hold her-"

"AH-A FOUND THEM BYE BYE I'M LATE"

"Wait Daddy you have to take me to school"

*sound of a car leaving and a potential childhood trauma

"e...isn't that Kawaki's son"
concluded Assassin after our neighbors shenanigans

"nope that kid down there is the son of miss Saiomi"
I responded

"no way? he has gotten so big!"

"it's the age they grow up after all"

"your right Master, I remember when your beard began to grow you were so confused ...what were we talking about"

"about the cowboy bebop marathon we will do this evening"
I lied

"oh riiiight...but one thing first."
Assassin said putting an hand under his chin.

"what?"
I asked smelling the perfume of victory, I had just dodged a spar with an angry Hikigaya Hachiman...that had more than 8 hours of sleep...basically an one man army.

"DODGE!"
He screamed dashing towards me
suddenly the perfume of victory smelled like shit.

---

"ARGHHHH"
I grunted parrying a powerful punch with my crossed arms.

"a spar fight with Hachiman...Nothing out of usual"
I thought gaining distance from my pajama wearing opponent

a few steps back , the only thing that I had to do now was step back and assume my fighting stance. It wasn't difficult Assassin wanted to have a "fair fight" so his attack just now was a preventive strike to set the mood. Feet solidly on the ground, knees in tension and fist up, three basic things I spent years to learn properly under the tutelage of Assassin and Jeanne.

"move your right foot half centimetre further"
told me Assassin assuming his fighting stance.

I immediately corrected, eyeing in the meantime my opponent, no my sensei, no...my SHISHOU. Our postures in this moment resembled each other, both of us had no openings yet I knew we were different, very different.

"Now we shall have a bare handed fight, you are in disadvantage because the sword is you main weapon and so you will unconsciously try to defend more your arms, try to keep that in mind"
Hachiman said...like he did every single time we fight without weapons

"bare-handed so no magic...this is gonna be tough"
I thought studying a plan

First the zone; three satellite antennas and nothing else, using the battle field for some kind of strategy was out of questions
Second escape route; none that didn't imply jumping down the skyscraper also the distance between me and assassin was around five metres too short, he could reach me in a second
Third the opponent; Assassin was in his IV mode...Isshiki's one, the most difficult to hit among the various mode but also the one that likes to tease more, I could try a psychological attack and find an opening during one of his evasions...that meant I had to fight aggressively

" we will fight for three minutes if you land two direct hits you win"
Assassin stated concluding the rules of our mock battle

I had 180 seconds...so no time to waste.
dashing through the small cloud my breath made in the wintery air I started the fight. My first move was roundhouse kick aimed to Assassin's neck, nothing to flashy just an ordinary kick to start the deadly dance of Oroboro the Tiānguó zhī hé de quántóu, the fist of the heavenly river...or somenthing tawdry similar.
Assassin immediately responded to my attack anticipating my blow, his elbow connected with my leg absorbing my strike and returning another roundhouse kick the third move of Tiānguó zhī hé de quántóu

"First principle of Tiānguó zhī hé de quántóu, anticipate, endure, read the flow of each strike and bend it to your will"
I reminded watching the foot of my opponent aim at my cheek

"...dejavù wonder how Caules is doing"

To counter Assassin's attack I immediately performed the fourth move of Tiānguó zhī hé de quántóu, I rose my left hand fast like a lightning and let bending it until the right point I absorbed all the power of the strike with minimal damage (my PALM HURTED LIKE HELL), then I shifted my weight on my right leg that had just regained footing after my first kick and with a small spin I closed even more the distance with Assassin. It took me less than a second all the strenght I received from Assassin kick and mine was given back with my fist drove towards Assassin

"Second principle of Tiānguó zhī hé de quántóu never lose momentum each blow must become faster and stronger"

I didn't expected nothing from my punch, Assassin and I were still within the first ten moves of Tiānguó zhī hé de quántóu, every strike was still relatively slow, it was still possible to take a blow without receiving serious damage and most important not me nor Assassin was enchanting his strength; so we needed at least other five exchanges to build up enough power and speed.

the next moments of the fight were just a me and him striking and countering each other raising up the speed of every blow, we were like the rapids of a river, fists, feet, elbows, knees it didn't matter which part of our body we were going to strike with, the other would have already prepared the perfect counter.
My breathing was intense but regular and all my muscles (and I mean all even those people doesn't think exist) were pleasantly aching a few sweat drops fell from my forehead, I didn't want to back off. Assassin and I reached the fifteenth move in a matter of seconds but then my opponent did an unexpected thing, he let himself be hit by my foot in the centre of his chest and was propelled a few metres backward

"One direct hit,"
I thought gasping for air,

I was...happy, yes it was happiness, I managed to land a strike yet something was off Assassin didn't even tried to counter my last blow.

"Good job brat now come at me seriously"
he mocked me with a creepy grin while his hand invited me

It's pretty shameful to say that I fell so easily to his cheap provocation, I acted on instinct, I didn't think too much I just wanted to erase that grin.

"my heart resonates...
heat enough to burn...
my blood' beat is razor sharp
SUNLIGHT YELLOW OVERDRIVE"

I screamed projecting myself in front of Assassin

I began to storm with my fists faster than any boxer ever could yet, I was unable to even graze Hikigaya, he dodged every single punch with bare minimum movements, there wasn't any kind of waste. It was frustrating every time I believed I hit him he just slipped past my attacks

"ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA"
not even my war shout helped me.

He was playing with me...dressed with that damn shirt full of little hearts, what a sick joke.
Since my punches had apparently bored him Assassin did a back flip (cool!) creating some distance between us...Good... and then dashed towards me driving his left elbow in my stomach...Bad.

"Ugh "
I grunted while in my damaged brain arrived a strange conversation:

["HI stomach-chan"

"Elbow-senpai i missed you, it's been so long"

"yeah I missed you too"]

"...Fuck now I ship them!"
I muttered while Assassin slipped behind my back and performed a german suplex

"oh you gotta be kiddin-"
I thought before my skull was cracked...weren't three minutes passed already!

A painful shock ran through my body, I could feel my vertebrae hugging each other and a warm stream of blood filling my nose...ehw it was like smelling molten iron.
the only good thing was that the floor of the roof was unexpectedly comfy and warm
(A/N actually his damaged brain is just sending random signals, the roof is cold)
"...Nice I could get used to"
I whispered deepening my relationship with the floor tiles.

"Hey brat get up you have still a minute worth of sparring and you still have to land one hit in order to win"
Assassin said with his usual bored tone

"mmmmmmmm don't wanna please help me my proud servant"
I moaned lying with my bloodied face towards the sky

"yare yare incoming"
He groaned slowly walking towards my immobile body while a conspicuous amount of blood was accumulated in my mouth

"Do you surrender?"
Asked me Assassin starring in my eyes from above

"NOW!"
I screamed in my head resorting to the cheapest trick I could imagine

Spitting blood in my opponent face...not very heroic, but I JUST WANTED TO WIN. For a moment time slowed down, I knew It was the time of a blink of an eye yet I clearly saw my bloody spit reach Assassin's face blinding him, he was very surprised or disgusted I wasn't really good at reading faces. Thanks to God with my dirty move I managed to buy a second, not much of course but, enough to let stand up with a shot of kidneys and drive my left fist towards Assassin's chin

"do not dodge it, do not dodge it"
I prayed before...that Mother****er dodged my fist at point blank range

"Oh Fuck you!"
I screamed falling back .

"Spitting blood really? It's dirty and unfair...did I ever tell you how much I'm proud of you"
laughed off Assassin cleaning his face with the right sleeve of his pajama.
Now he seemed to have come out from a series D horror movie

"Com'on let's end this"
I said tired of this morning spar

Starring in Assassin's dead eyes I dirty my left hand's fingers with the blood on my face.

"Oh you wanna end it like this? peculiar"
He said biting his left thumb and dying his fingers of red too

(SUMMONING JUSTU...nope)

"The snake"
I began drawing an infinite on my right hand back, exactly on my command seals

"bares its fangs"
concluded Assassin doing the same.

---

Hebi wa sono kiba o hadaka ni suru or for normies the snake bares its fangs.

The only pure offensive move in the whole Tiānguó zhī hé de quántóu (A/N ahaha I switch from japanese to chinese...why I never keep things simple); while all the other techniques of the official martial art of Oroboro are based on counters this one is the purest form of attack.
Rarely executed outside sparring, this move consists in fifty steps with the purpose of built up as much speed and power allowed to the user body, It's an extremely occasional move that each martial artist personalize in order to make use of skills at best.
To "launch" the snake fangs challenge is obligatory to draw with blood the infinite symbol of Oroboro on the back of the right hand...what a damn Chuuni thing do to

---

"1"
first step
"2"
second step
"3"
I began to count in my mind moving my feet and arms in precise position.
my eyes began to spin as an incredible amount of kinetic energy flowed within my body
4
5
6
7
8
9
faster I had to be faster: jumps, one hand standings the list of motions I was about to do on one spot would have made run away in shame every break-dancer in the world
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
every muscle was contracted and relaxed at insane speed, my lungs felt heavy
"...Must...regularize... breathing"
I struggled to think while the world around me was turning in deformed color stains
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
28
29
30
Point of no return after the thirtieth step, I had gathered all the power possible while remaining on a single spot, It was time to advance
31
32
33
the most difficult part of the whole technique, three movement that converted all the spinning kinetic energy in horizontal one
*crack
The floor cracked as I concluded the 33th step and propelled myself towards Assassin...not to point out how awesome I was but...I was practically at the speed of sound
34
35
36
37
38
39
40
41
42
43
44
45
46
47
fourteen movements, the last fourteen movements consisting in some steps, a front-flip and two cartwheels, which only purpose was increase my speed at maximum
48
"find footing for your left foot"
I told myself
49
"aim your opponent"
50
"strike with your most powerful kick"
I screamed

*bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaammmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
a terrifying roar ripped the air around me and Assassin as our legs had clashed, my pants were tore up, I could feel cracks in my bones but, I was optimistic...I had been faster than Assassin I saw it when our kicks collided yet, something went wrong... in the second our blows reached each other...I stared at the fifty one movement

Assassin had not done the usual right ultrasonic kick, he had done a left ultrasonic kick.
when my blow connected he wasn't searching for comparison of power...he was looking for more power. Unfortunately when I came to this realization it was too late all the power I had gathered, had already been absorbed in Hikigaya's leg.

the next few instants in my eyes were just five things: the Hachiman's left foot soundless cracking the floor, his light spin, that damned right heel of his aimed at my face moving at frightening speed, those all knowing dead eyes and the words
"anticipate, endure, read the flow of each strike and bend it to your will"

"I'm dead."
I thought closing my eyes

...

(noise of compressed air*waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaammmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm)

...
"or maybe not"
I whispered peeking to my side

...there was an heel at two millimetres from my head, suddenly my knees felt weak and I sloped on the ground

(sound of an homunculus that has probably wet himself falling on the ground *tunf)

"I lost"
I muttered running away from a heart attack, I couldn't move I was too tired

"and can you tell me why?"
asked Assassin fatherly

"You are too strong"
I whispered gathering the small amount of air I still had within my lungs

"Wrong..."

"then Wh...y"
I questioned raising my eyes from the ground to Assassin.

I was without words h-h-he was all bloodied, like he had just ran through a mincer

"What's the principle number zero of the whole Tiānguó zhī hé de quántóu?"
he responded uncaring of his situation

"he must had reduced himself in that pitiful condition because he stopped the blow before hitting me"
I thought incapable of staring at Hachiman's blood stained pajama

"Oi brat I asked you a question"
he roared

"y-you are weak"
I began with trebling voice

" so the strongs will always start above you"
continued quietly as I gained more confidence

" yet you will never be defeated if you can turn their strength in yours, evolve, be smart, be creative, be effective and never stop progressing"

"that's right...so next time you have to bare your fangs, not mine or someone elses, it's time you create something on your own"

"you aren't just saying I should come up with my own version of the technique right?"

"who knows"

---

"Hey honey..."
I limped in the attic while Jeanne was getting ready to head out

"Yes Sieg"
she responded casually giving me her shoulder

"Do you remember that pants I bought on sale last week?"
I introduced the hot topic

"They are in the second wardrobe"
My wife said brushing her golden hairs

"ah no I didn't meant the red ones that...what was it...made my butt look tight?"

"my favorites...I mean which pants do you mean the black ones?"
she asked slowly turning herself

"Yeah I kinda tored them"
I played it calmly

"what the hell happened!?"
Jeanne outbursted

I wondered why, it wasn't like I was bloodied, with my clothes tored, a potential cranic trauma and the pants I bought a week ago ruined...I might be seeing her point now

"well it's a funny story actuall-"
I began,

"morning spar"
Cut me down Assassin walked in the attic even more messed up than me...surpring enough this calmed Jeanne

"Couldn't you two at least avoid to destroy those pants they were of a good brand!"
She complained puffing her cheeks

"must supress...the waifu...vibes"
I muttered grasping my heart...too much cuteness together I had to control

"Sieg are you okay?"
my kawiife (ahaha get it kawaii and wife together...Sieg you are a damn genius) rushed besides me

"mmmhhmmmmmm"
I muttered nodding as my wife unconsciously wasn't helping at all

"please stop being cute, just do something like having your stomach growling please"
I thought leaning on Jeanne's shoulder

"ah he is gonna be fine"
said Assassin cold as usual.

but as much I hate to admit it, I really felt fine a few moment later, I was sure it was all thanks to Jeanne... not some coffee drinking servant who had just turned in his "I" mode and healed me with his magic...no way
it was thanks to L-O-V-E

"see all healthy and sturdy"
muttered him sipping hot coffee from a cup Bleach themed.

"Can't you hold back a bit more?"
took my defences Jeanne

"Nope"

"I see..."
returned to prepare herself.

"Really just like that, fight for me more "
I complained in my head

I grabbed a few sheets of scottecs and began to clean my face planning to take a shower of something in the immediate future.

"then I'm off"
said my wife opening the entrance door...aww she was wearing the coat we bought all those years ago in Romany

"Where are you going?"
I asked still a bit dirty of blood

"I'm going to Mass, then to speak with Kotomine Kirei and then to do the shopping...we are out of..."
she responded counting on her fingers

"Milk, we are out of milk, How about we meet outside for lunch and eat somewhere?"
I offered scratching my chin

"Saize"
Assassin said

"NO WE ARE NOT GOING TO THE DAMN SAIZE!"
"NO WE ARE NOT GOING TO THE DAMN SAIZE!"
My wife and I retorted to that cheap food loving servant

"fine...fine...I like you two more, when you were in highschool and didn't retorted so badly...sigh"
Sulked Hikigaya returning to have breakfast

"uff... okay shall we meet at 1PM in centre then decide where to go?"
returned to the original topic Jeanne

" Perfect, have you enough Mana for today?"
I asked concerned for her well being

"Don't worry I'm equipped"
She responded smiling with her beautiful white teeth and taking out something from her bag

It was a package of red gummy bears...if you omit that they were made with sugar, gelatine and my blood, the entire scene would have been pretty cute...naaaa it was still cute even with some gory elements.

"have a nice day"
I told my wife checking her slender thighs hidden by a pair of blue jeans

"Still NO REACTION...don't I have some kind of fetish to use?"
I thought remaining disappointed of my biology.

without another word Jeanne left the attic ready to start her Ruler's and wife's duties, I was really a lucky homunculus...take that ever virgin harem protagonists, so as I was out of my blonde goddess field-view I reached my Nintendo on the couch and began to level up my Samurot,
"Level 100 I'm coming"
I happily mumbled tapping on the console's buttons

"You have noticed, right?"
Asked me Assassin quietly

I could feel his "I" eyes pointed on me...I wanted to ignore his question...but avoiding the matter wasn't something I could really allow myself to

"Yeah...She is hiding something"
I sighed with cold voice

I had known it since she smiled, there was definitely something wrong

"what do you think it is, news about a servant she can't disclose? "
I wondered stopping to move my fingers

"maybe, standing to the news there have been quite a few murders in the past two weeks...none under seven years old was killed and all the victims seemed dried"
reported Assassin heading towards his room

"Definitely the work of a servant in need of Mana, the number of murders is too low so It can't be a servant from the three knight class or a Berserker...perhaps a Caster"
I voiced my thoughts

but after I said so *stun a newspaper hit my head

"No I believe the killer is a Rider, besides watch six offices in the past few days have launched a gas alarm, all the male employees had mysteriously fainted after a light pink gas appeared. It was a precise and indirect job most likely this is Caster work "
Lectured me Assassin pointing at the title of the newspaper.

"So we have two servant with mana issues...it makes them careless and dangerous for by standers.. is it this that Jeanne is hiding?"
I elaborated all the information

"dunno, but collecting all the information I could about those two servant I made this"
said Assassin placing a map on the kitchen table

"what is it?"
I asked walking towards my servant

"what do you think it is brat, a map of course...see the triangles and the crosses"
he said pointing his index on the map

It was the latest version of the whole area of Fuyuki, I searched all the crosses and triangles noticing that beside each symbol was written a date...How long did it take to Assassin to do everything, probably he didn't sleep much the past few days. Judging from It was clear that hunt zone of two servants were completely different and that Caster had been summoned way earlier than Rider.

"Now follow my reasoning"
began Hikigaya drawing a circle around all the crosses with a red pen

"here we have all the places in which Caster harvested Mana"
said pointing on each one

"The most recent is from a month ago"
I pointed out, judging from Hachiman's eyes I just said what he wanted me to

"And that means..."

"Caster is dead!"

"...What did I tell you about being optimistic?"

"It will kill me...Caster stopped to harvest mana a month ago. It means he was able to gather enough power to create his bounded field and collect mana in a more stealthy way, right Assassin?"

"Correct Master, see that when you use your brain something useful can come out yet, you have made one mistake...Caster isn't a he it's a she"

"How do you know that?"

"Brat...a pink gas, only man affected, doesn't ring any bell?"

"oh NO"

"oh yes"

"A filter of love with mana absorption properties"
I said exasperated smashing my palm on the forehead

"Exactly"

"Damn is ancient magic Assassin this Caster can use a potion nobody could distill for more than 2000 years "

" She must be from ancient Greek or from an even older age"

"this really sucks...why do you seem so unaffected from the whole thing"
I complained lowering my hand.

Hikigaya had maintained his usual poker face all the time, it was suspicious...he surely just wanted to say something cool now.

"because I already tracked her down, you see-"

"she is at the Ryuudo temple right?"

"..."

"It's the most strategic spot and the centre of her hunt zone"

"You couldn't let me do a cool explanation..could you"
sulked Assassin pinching his nose bridge in his fingers

"Yeah how does it feels to have your cool speech ruined eh Assassin"
revenge taste was so sweet

"Okay my bad...Caster is indeed in the Ryuudo temple; the increase of people fainting casually around the area is the proof that a bounded field is absorbing mana in the zone, ehm "

"What...what was that ehm for, you always sigh like this when something is wrong"

"Well, Caster servant if provided enough can summon a low level servant..."

"So to beat Caster we might first kill a miniboss, nothing too shocking, we can easily wait for a servant from the three knight class to take it down "
I said unfazed

"Yeah...about that, the servant Caster summoned is kinda an Assassin and he is interfering with me..."
told me Hikigaya like he had just found out the zip of his jeans was open...

"what?"
I blinked multiple times and cleaned my ears

"we must take down this fake Assassin as soon as possible or my existence as a servant will become unstable... or more than already is "

*stan
Hachiman's words reached me like an hammer, I smashed my head on the table out of...irritation yeah irritation

"You know that means completely discarding our main plan of setting up fights between the other servants and control the whole war from the shadows."
I muttered with my nose compressed on the table

"Third rule of Oroboro"

"aaaaaahhhhhhhhh make plans until z"
I groaned rising my head

"that's right. Besides this fake Assassin is a low level servant, I can take it down easily using a Noble Phantasm,hell probably even you can defeat him with the proper strategy... the only drawback is that some information about us will be leaked."
said my servant being...optmistic...impossible he was going to spat some kind of scary warning, 1,2 ,3 now

"After all if we can't even take down a trash servant like this one, we will brutally murdered int his war"
...exactly what I was narrating about

"Fine...this afternoon we check all the equipment for the fight...and then kill the guy...you know where this dude is right?...Can we take a pause "
I said concluding the Caster conversation

I was well aware that I should have mmmm progressed more this topic, maybe discussing a plan or something...but checking the time I realized an anime I wanted to watch started in two minutes, so I just put in order my priorities

"of course Master"
Accepted Assassin over politely

for a moment my red eyes and Hikigaya numbered ones fixed each other...our second daily battle was about to start. I tensed my muscle turned my head and dashed towards a specific direction, Unfortunately my servant had outspeeded me...he was already on the couch and the TV was tuned on PrettyCure ...I couldn't really complain about that. So putting aside my Master's pride I joined him mumbling the opening song of the anime I was about to watch.

---

(25: 37 minutes later)

"Next time"
said a Maho Shojo on the screen of the tv at the end of the PreCure episode

"Ah turn it off, Assassin turn it off I don't want any spoiler"
I jumped on behind the couch covering my ears

" Ah you are such pain master"
groaned Assassin turning off the Tv

"uff save"
I muttered returning to sit beside my servant.

"good job me even today you dodge spoilers"
I thought sinking in the pillows of the sofa

Today I had been slow, I had nearly seen the next episode teaser...such a naive mistake.

"I don't understand why you are so obstinate in avoiding, the teaser of the next episode"
Hikigaya complained standing up.

"Live you with the only person on the earth that knows each anime produced until 2088"
I threw a pillow towards him.

he dodged it...naturally, It was so frustrating when I forgot how untouchable Assassin was. Following his example I stood up and followed my servant again beside the table of the kitchen, where the map with Rider's movements waited for me.

"You know I'm also the only person alive that knows the end of Berserk right?"
Hikigaya boasted sitting in his usual spot

"stop reminding me of that...why the narration is still on hiatus, but must important why are you still in that pajama!"
I retorted while my patience had been worned out by my damn servant.

Trying to return to serious matters I placed my hands on the map. All the triangles on it where places where Rider had attacked, there were 8 marks all of them in east Fuyuki

"So...Rider, what do we know"
I began eyeing the map trying to find some hints on the map

"apart from its need of mana nothing precise"
responded Assassin spinning a pen in his hand

"well first things first, Rider's hunt zone is thinner than Caster's one and is focused on residential districts..."
I said squeezing my meninges

"Rider's servant heavily rely on their Noble Phantasm to fight, without enough mana they are pretty done for...yet is strange..."

"What is strange Hikigaya"

"It doesn't make sense why Rider only attacked in residential areas, attacking a factory in the industrial area would be faster and easier to hide...I mean with the power of a servant is easy create an explosion, a single boom then you slaughter a few workers and the game is done. A lot of mana harvested, less risk to be seen and all the other master would take more time to realize what's going on, even if the factory is placed in Caster's hunt zone"

"...for some reason now I'm happy you're not an enemy, but you're right something is fishy, or maybe it's not"
I rose my hand towards the sky

"What do you mean?"

"We are thinking too much about the servant, let's focus on the Master, look"
I robbed Assassin of his pen

with a swifth movement I drew a single line that passed on all the triangles of the map

"Let's assume the master of Rider is a third rate Magus or worse and that he or she harvest mana only in the residential area because the industrial one is too near to Caster's zone"
I said quietly...

"that would mean Rider's master is the last arrived...he is well aware of how the Holy Grail War works"
Hikigaya blinked no-stop probably something was in his eyes (A/N no Sieg, he was blinded by your shining genius, that or the pride of a father, choose you)

"Exactly waga no servant...I mean my servant, the master of Rider must be a member of the three founding families, namely Tohsaka, Matou, Einzbern.

"and if we count that Tohasaka and Einzbern are first tier Magi..only a member of the Matou family can be the Master we are searching."
Muttered Assassin voicing my thoughts

"Now watch between what all the triangles"
I said drawing a circle around two things

"Fuyuki's Highschool and Matou's residence...I can't believe I haven't noticed before. The master is a Matou brat for goodness sake"
softly punched his own head Hikigaya

"nice job Sieg"
whispered my servant rising an hand

"Thanks"
I said shaking his hand

(A/N Sieg was supposed to high five it)

"today we have done a lot of progress...thanks saturday everything is better with you"
I thought heading towards the shower while Assassin was finally going to wear something proper.

both of us were still wearing tored and bloodied clothes.

"Hey master I realized I mighy have problem"
told me my servant wearing a cheap t-shirt

Oh...optmism really was going to kill me one day

"What is it? Please don't tell that even Rider is a problem with your summoning"
I suppressed my tears

"No I mean I might have a problem"
repeated Assassin like I could understand what he meant just like tha..t ohhhhh

"ah you might have a problem, your younger self that...is...in the same...highschool...of..Rider's...master"
I intended snapping my fingers at first energically and then like I was keeping the time for a funeral choir.

"what are the odds he finds himself in the middle of the war?"
I asked scared of the answer

"I just say that if the temporal space continuum breaks it wasn't my fault...it was my fault"
responded Assassin raising his shoulders

"Time travel is bullshit!"

---

"soooooo, tell me brat when we were supposed to meet gamine"
Asked me Assassin adjusting his sunglasses

"fifteen minutes ago"
I responded annoyed

Really my wife was a lot of beautiful things yet punctual was not one of those things. My servant and I were currently in the middle of the shopping district waiting for Jeannne to arrive, we were supposed to meet at 1 PM to have lunch together, yet It was 1: 15 PM and of her not even the shadow. Of course as the caring husband I was, I was ready to wait for her as long as it would take, enduring the cold air of winter just putting my hands in the pockets of my old brown coat. Unfortunately Assassin wasn't of the same advice and since 1: 02 had begun to ask how late Jeanne was every...

"soooooo, tell me brat when we were supposed to meet gamine"

34.8 seconds, tenth plus tenth less

"Always fifteen minutes ago Hikigaya"
I groaned fixing my eyes towards the servant

He was shameless when food comes in too play, between Jeanne and him I didn't know who was worse...and the worst thing was that I thought Assassin was normal when I was in highschool

"...how many years wasted to understand he was a complete antisocial with poor manners and a rotten personality."
I thought shaking my head

From outside you wouldn't believe it. After all with all his dark clothes and sunglasses Hikigaya seemed a respectable Japanese man...okay maybe respectable is an exaggeration, let's say a yakuza with businessman traits. Some people could even find him attractive.
Unfortunately the game changes when people discover in his death eyes and begin to know him.
Lazy, irritable, awkward and cold, that's what he was.
yet he could be wise, patient, understanding and warm

"soooooo, tell me brat when we were supposed to meet gamine"

"And maybe it's why to me Hikigaya is the best and the worst person in the world."
I told myself hinting a smile

"Sorry I'm late, did you wait for long"
arrived Jeanne slightly panting with reddened cheeks...cute

"No we have just arrive-"

"Sieg is lying we have been here for fifteen minutes"
said Assassin cutting off my masterfully crafted lie

"really I'm sorry"

"ah don't sweat over it, you're her now that's what matter"
I said embracing her

at first Jeanne was surprised by my sudden demonstration of L-O-V-E but she quietly let herself loose in my arms, I was...happy to smell her fragrance after a long morning, but I was even happier to disperse the dogs. But who are the dogs? someone might think, well the answers is simple; the dogs are all the stupid humans that start watching my wife around the streets and might dare to approach her.

"Yeah get away, get away you Dogs, this premium article is no longer for sale"
I mumbled while my left hand wandered on Jeanne's butt.

"Sieg! we are in public"
muttered my wife blushing

"fulness...don't mind it"
I said only focusing on my tactile sensations

and I could feel it, I could feel it a REACTION is coming and

*growl
My goddess' stomach complained for the lack of food...Dammit

"Are we finally going to eat or you two want to rent a room"
complained Assassin

"ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...let's go"
I said unable to re-find my mood.

---

"Menus how the most wonderful kind of written document. They tease your eyes and imagination before pointing at your stomach...But what does it means when this books instead of food feed you with lies...it means someone didn't do his job properly"
I thought as a waiter told me the dish I wanted to order was guess what OUT OF ORDER

per se the whole thing wasn't really a problem but, when the same situation happened three times within half hour and that Dog waiter had continued to stare at my wife's chest...I was going to get angry.
There was no mistake the burning feeling in my belly was anger...and huger, let's say a 80% 20%

"do you want some of my curry rice, or grilled fish or mampo or [...]"
asked my Jeanne after I ordered the lunch for the fourth time

"No thank you"
I said smiling and cutting off the endless list of dishes she had ordered

"Really I see your hungry, try this mampo is delicious"
she raised a spoon full of mampo towards me smiling.

"Don't worry, I'm fine and you have to replish your mana...besides is it normal that just starring that thing my eyes are weeping?"
I refused calmly

that was close, I had almost accepted hypnotized by her white teeth and violet eyes but, I couldn't really steal food from Jeanne...expecially Mampo, It was beyoind my comprension how she could like a food so spicy so much.

"Are you very sure...please say ahh"
my wife unleashed an ultimate move

"Fuck...me"
I mumbled

I couldn't refuse her, so opening my mouth and leaning I headed towards a land of no return.
"ahhhh"

"and there"
Jeanne stuffed the spoon in my mouth.

Once the spicy food landed on my tongue I actually thought "No bad", then "ah spicy", "really spicy", "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH". I had never been set aflame before...but I guess the feeling is nearly the same.

"So how is it?"
she Jeanne asked me in her usual cute fashion

"g-g-goodd...may I have some water"
I managed to say after the risk of autocombustion was gone

*click
"And this go in the family album"
said Assassin snapping a photo with his smartphone

I was about to complain about that but my food arrived before I could. Then hunger beaten anger and the rest is story.

---

After my so called "family" finished to eat and came out from the restaurant, the first thing I did was; leave a horrible recension on trip advisor...it was the only Idea I had after

"...maybe I should have just turned the whole place into ashes, a small price for the waiter after he indulged his eyes on my wife."

It was a good thing I learned how to control anger, being an emotionless homunculus and stuff wasn't really a bonus when I had to control emotions I wasn't used to. So many anti-stress ball destroyed.

"so I think I will stop in the library for a while, I will contact you Master later"
said Assassin disappearing in the crowd of the shopping district.

"Thank god he knows when I want to spend some marital time"
I thought walking and in the hand with Jeanne

we didn't have a destination we just walked around enjoying each other presence, Saint valentine was near all the alleys were festively decorated it was truly beautiful...for the first ten minutes then the endless array and baby angels made me sick.

"Do you want a coffee or something"
I asked to my wife, that blissfully ignored me.

Apparently I had first to distract her from a...pastry shop?
We had literally finished to eat ten minutes ago but, it was a surplus for my plans so I guess it was fine. Still thank God everything she ate turned into mana, I wouldn't dare to imagine what would happen otherwise...chubby Jeanne.
Unable to resist the urge to accomplish my husbands duties, I gently dragged Jeanne inside the pastry shop, I knew she wanted to enter more than I did.
Once we made our way inside the shop an old lady I labelled as Cotton, made us sat down in a table for two and brought us two menus.
...I really hoped at least she knew how to do her job!

"So What does my glutton princess want to order?"
I teased Jeanne caressing her hand

"MOU don't call me like that...two hot chocolates please"
she responded hiding her nose beneath her purple pullover.

Fun fact I coud still see a furious blush on her face...too much cuteness

"as you wish Hime-sama"
I slightly bowed continuing to be the proud knight of the glutton princess

Even more embarrassed than before Jeanne stocked out her tongue in a priceless grimace.
"You are not funny Sieg"

"But you're the cutest when you are embarrassed"
I promptly responded winking.

Garnet, Ruby, Crimson yeah pretty much all shades of red were now on my wife's face. Nine years with her have yielded very much.

"we are ready to order...what eh two hot chocolates and an Earl gray tea...yes two chocolates"
Jeanne searched for a way out using her most trusted ally the food

"I guess I had already teased her enough."
I thought slighty smiling...my wife knew what I wanted to order without I even told her, she was so caring

(two minutes later)

"So how did the scouting with Hikigaya go?"
Asked me my wife sipping her hot drink...I was sure mine was better

"A pretty well we know where to find the Caster and Rider servants, now we just need to confirm the summoning of Archer and Saber"
I responded at ease sugaring my tea

"you have been quick...Did you and Assassin do something illegal to obtain those information?"
Jeanne looked at me with inquisitive eyes

"define illegal...in the garage we already have enough to be convicted as terrorists"

"Kidnappings, torture?"

"who do you think we are?!"

"Hikigaya and you always came out with bizarre things so I keep myself ready for anything"

"...fair... ehm"

" What...what was that ehm for, you always sigh like this when something is wrong"

"Now wrong is a big word, let's say something is unexpected..."

"Go on"

"Assassin and I are going to fight a servant tonight"

"Oh I see"
said Jeanne calmly, however it was clear she was anxious... the cup of hot chocolate in her hand kinda turned into pieces...good thing it was already empty

"Jeanne relax, we knew this moment was going to come one day"
I told her caressing her soft cheek

"yes, I know...it's just it can't be helped, I'm worried"
she muttered grasping my hand and making our rings tingle

"I know but Hikigaya got my back and I have a trump card up on my sleeve"
I spat somekind of shounen protagonist no-sense

"Are really you going to use that card again Sieg? It will consume you"

"Maybe, but these nine years I spent training have not been meaningless... besides if everything ends up well it will be up to you to consume me"
I kissed her cheeks and left the shop

Assassin was calling me.

---

(A/N I warmly suggest to listen Bad in Back)

*strrrnnn

"hello toys"
I said while Assassin was lifting a portcullis

"bring only light and useful things, I highly recommend to avoid grenades, half of the servants will probably just throw them back at you"
stated my surely-not-scary-servant entering in a dark room.

Actually it was just a garage...my garage...the one filled with so many weapon, that could make me be labelled as a potential terrorist, not the one where I kept all my figures..it was the right to the left.

"aye aye I know"
I responded turning on the lights.
It took a few flashes of white neons before I could clearly see that crude room filled only with caissons of every dimension and material.

"so where did you go after leaving Jeanne and I ?"
I casually asked opening a metal caisson

"to the library"
he responded ordering in front of himself a dozen of different guns

"okay...let's suppose you did not, where would have you gone?"
I threw him some loaders

"hmmm I'd say to scout the Ryuudo temple when there were still tourists, just to found anything interesting"
he said loading all the guns in front of him with a round of clacks

"interesting uh?... can you pass me my throwing knives"
I asked before receiving two leather belts filled with sharp pieces of metal.
I immediately felt reassured as their familiar weight burdened my hands. I acquired them a few years ago during a trip in India, of course they weren't just some random souvenir shop. My knives came directly from the magical gray market...yeah gray...the black market was just for curses and magical creatures' organs.

"hey Assassin in which mode are you going to fight?"
I inquired tightening the two belts around my hips

"I guess the fifth one. The Silent Coat (Shizukana kōto) is my best Noble phantasm when it comes to fight an unknown opponent"
He responded wearing his combat suit

blue particles started to spin around Assassin's body and all his daily clothes turned into his black Oroboro uniform. Each time I saw Hikigaya wear his most beloved head of clothing a ticklish emotion crawled in my stomach...It was envy, I wanted a combat suit like his too!
I knew it wasn't possible because it would have meant rob Oroboro... probably the closest action to suicide but com'on, looking at how much technology and magic that suit was embodied with, who could resist the desire.

"brat stop staring at me and get your stuff"
Assassin's voice dragged me away from my stylistic dreams

"Sure...I will have that suit"

"No you won't...and why would you want my suit, you're the one with the dragon blood armor"

As usual he didn't understand the difference between cool and useful, my servant was really hopeless. Yet I ended up doing what he ordered me to and went to get my stuff. First thing was my reinforced gauntlets from Scandinavia, then my greaves and a whole set of flashbangs plus some smoke bombs, I carefully avoided to take grandes...even if it left a bitter aftertaste in my mouth.

"Okay...NOW my proud servant bring my main weapon"
I exclaimed stepping above a caisson

"get it yourself I'm preparing the rocket-launchers"

"you know I think the relationship MASTER and SERVANT should be a little different"
I sulked

"Repeat it when your documents don't say I'm your parent"

"You're no fun..."
I said admitting defeat

So dragging my feet I reached a completely black box big as a guitar.
"Logic path(Straße)/open(gehen)"
I poured my mana on the polished box.

With ftssss sound of pressurized air the black caisson opened. Inside it there was a rusty bar of metal...that reminded of anything except a sword...unfortunately it was a sword indeed. I guess a thousand of years under water without any kind of mana did that to a sword...even the mighty Bahalmung

"hello old partner"
I said staring at the sword

Quick bits of Siegfried memories flashed across my eyes... it was hard for me to grab that weapon, it was a key that easily unlocked the latent instincts, Siegfried left me in his heart. Suppressing the headache afflicting my brain I extend my hand and picked up the sword.

"SIEGFRIED!"

"BAHALMUNG!"
Two different voices screamed in my head...two words and my head was already split in half.

"Stupid my heart"
I groaned in pain

It was always like this...I grab the weapon, the weapon call upon itself Siegfried power and I have to avoid that the precious heroical/magical juice in my magic circuits drifted on his own towards the sword...what a pain.
Focusing as much as I could I suppressed all the heroic mana I had within myself and poured mine in the sword.
suddenly Bahalmung started to shape shift, leaving aside its rusty outfit and displaying his...oriental one.

---

Bahalmung, Gram or Nothung a single sword many names...Why? I asked myself five years ago while on summer holidays Jeanne I and Assassinn were in Germany searching the lost weapon.
At first I thought it was just because it's name had been translated in many ways during the history, but apparently it wasn't like that.
Siegfried's magical sword belongs to the family of the numulariorum formare, Shape shifter, that means it's a weapon that inside holds a jewel filled ancient magic, however this ancient magic is free from any kind of attributes, holy, demoniac, elemental...that kind of stuff. So whenever the sword changes its master the ancient magic within it shape and give an attribute to the weapon in base of the user's mana.

---

And that was why the elegant katana in my hand was Bahalmung yet it was not. Probably all the names the sword in my hand acquired were referred to the different forms assumed by the weapon through the history. Standing to the info Assassin and I found: Nothung was the dark form of the sword when the evil dragon Fafnir was its master, then there was Siegfried's Bahalmung and Gram well... was still Siegfried's...and much more powerful than Bahalmung. Probably due Siegfried growth as an hero the sword itself changed.

"well it doesn't concern me"
I said sheating sword in the apposite scabbard Assassin gave me during a Christmans.

In comparison to Bahalmung my sword was pretty pathetic, it didn't give that "I'm a ultra kick ass sword" vibes, nor could unleash an anti-army beam...I guess...I didn't know the true name of my sword so...Its final move could really be anything.
(Sieg's mind: please be a Stand please be a Stand)

"Hey master I have a problem here!"
Assassin screamed

How unusual

"What is it Hikigaya?"
I asked him running in his direction

I didn't know what to expect , the more I approached, more struggling sounds I heard and more empty cans of MaxCoffe were scattered on the floor,

"what did he do"
I madly repeated

"MASTEEERRRRR"

"Hachiman what the hell"
I erupted appearing in front of my servant

What could possibly be so wrong to make my servant ask for help...I repeat HIKIGAYA HACHIMAN was asking help...that sound strange even just as a part of the narration.
He was bent over the ground trying to lift a Yellow and brown can of Max coffee.

" What are you doing? "
I asked robotically to my struggling servant

"I'm pooping, what in the bloody hell do you thing I'm doing, help me lift this thing."
He said clenching his teeth

"help you to lift a can?"

"it's not just a can is my freaking Noble Phantasm"

"...please repeat..."

"I said it's my freaking Noble Phantasm, do you remember the one that sustains me!"

"oh that one, you know you have too many trash Phantasms so it's difficult to remember the only one...that...really...matters...FUCK!"
I rushed besides my servant

"gland you understand!"
he said while the two of us tried to lift up the can

It was like a boulder.

"UGH!"
"SORYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
Assassin and I grunted using all our strength to pull up that evil piece of aluminium. It took us nearly a full minute plus a lot of effort to finally lift up that thing (A/N of 1 millimetre) and make Assassin able to turn it in spiritual form.

"The Fuck just happened and why your can was stuck in the floor? LOOK AT THAT HOLE IN THE CEMENT LOOK AT IT"
I said panting and screaming once I had enough air in my lungs

"I have done a terrible mistake...Imōto no ama-sa stopped to work properly"

"I have to calm down I have to calm down...define, what do you mean with stopped to work"

"I overestimated the power of this Noble Phantasm..."
Hikigaya said in self-mocking tone

"How could you overestimate your own magical artifact, an hero must know everything about their weapon!"
I said exasperated by the lack of direct answers

"Sieg how much do you remember about my weapons"
Hikigaya deadpanned me

"...ehhh...aaaah..OH! oh...right, before becoming a servant you never wielded any of your weapons"

"correct, so I know only what the Grail told me about their power...do you remember the ability of my can"
Assassin said trying to make me understand something

"Accumulate infinite Max coffee, turn it into mana or increase your basic stats"
I said without hesitation, after all I knew all Assassin's skill even the most pointless

" Yup, but I just discovered that after the can absorbs more than 200 kilos of Max... it starts to weight"

"..."

"..."

"so the can now weights 200 kilos or more"
I stated while my brain stared to shortcut

"yes"

"the odds you can still use it in the middle of a battle"
my synapses began to burn

"..low?"

"If you drink enough from the can, will it return to its original weight?"
nervous system ultra nervous

"dunno"

"dear God...Just how much coffee did you pour in it"
new record of anger level

"Around 250 litres..."

"In kilos"
approaching breaking point

"300"

"WHY THE # $X? [Sieg's long swearing] did you do that, Now we have to change plans! Again!...You know what! Just in the car and wait for me. Jesus!"
I outbursted leaving behind Hikigaya and going to take the last two pieces of my equipment.

Just how stupid could my servant be?
Fortunately I was about to fight someone, I REALLY NEEDED A STRESS RELIEVE AT THE MOMENT

---

"Night the perfect time to stay (A/N get it stay/night... yes I'm an horrible person) out of troubles, but not for our heros that would have already the Holy Grail in their hands if the servant wasn't A COMPLETE IDIOT"

"and the Master an homunculus with erectile dysfunction"

"I do not understand how the two things are Related"
I screamed braking sharply

(Sound of a servant face smashed against the dashboard *sbam)

"Dammit brat!"
Hikigaya groaned holding his nose

"serves you right for not wearing your safe belt, Now get down we have arrived"
I said coming out from my black Prius

I had just parked right in front of the long, stone stair of the Ryuudo temple. The air was chilly, except the moon and the stars the only light around me came from two lines of lanterns beside the stairs, They seemed to invite me in.

"Okay master do you have everything with you: your sword, the throwing knives, gun, ammunitions, flashbangs, Saber card?"
Asked me Hikigaya...using the TONE...his parental tone

"Yes old man I have all those things...and the ost-er"
responded trying to hide from his "I" eyes

"...you kidding right"
he said raising an eyebrow

"Don't judge me it gives me hype"
I sulked crossing my arms

"do as you like...the ost-er *tsk"
he raised his arms shaking his head

"Let's check the plan: you go stealth, I go straight, you remain hidden, I confront fake Assassin, you observe him and switch to the most fitting mode to take him down, then I go away you kick his ass then we party"
I listed on my fingers

"yeah and if Caster appears we fly away, let's try to not show our best moves"
Assassin said smoking a cigarette...since when did he smoke
I wanted to ask, maybe he had always smoked and I've never noticed... if that was the case it would be pretty embarrassing to ask.

"Have you stored enough mana from Siegfried's heart?"
asked me Assassin drawing an anonymous gun

" Yes 50% of the Mana I have got in my body is heroic one"
I responded throwing in the air a small flying drone sphere shaped.

"good remember: if the situation get dangerous do not hesitate to use a command seal or the card"
Hikigaya lastly recommended disappearing

"okay"
I said emotionless.

And so armed to the teeth I slowly began to walk towards my first real battle.
Step after step I felt an emotion growing inside me...fear? excitement? I didn't know, but it took me only a second to move aside that sensation and keep rising those stairs...apparently endless.

"a cool sentence to introduce myself, what can I say"
I wondered staring my feet

"Stop there you intruder!"
an imposing voice suddenly called me

it came from a Japanese man dressed in Edo fashion, judging from his clothes and hair he seemed to have fallen in a pool of violet and blue...a nice paring but a bit monotonous in my opinion.

*swiiing
A cold sound cut through the night, the definitely-not-a-servant-guy had unsheated a beautiful nodaci he kept on his back and with silent steps was coming down the stairs.
for a second the only thought in my mind was "WHAT A DOPE SWORD!"

"Hey Assassin it's him?"
I muttered in my earplugs, matching the seriousness of the situation

I know... a weirdly dressed man with a dope sword on his back and I dared to wonder if he was a servant...DUH?
Yet it was far better be safe than sorry

"Yes he is the fake Assassin servant Master, approach him carefully, see if things can be talked out"
responded Assassin in my ear

"Good...wait talked out? I don't believe things can be talked out at this point "
I retorted confused

"The best battle is the one you win without fighting... do as you desire kiddo, but if you fight this guy please, do not shout Getsuga tenshou ...like you usually do"
assassin spouted like he was my spiritual guide or something.

"I won't make any promise"
I said while the sword fella arrived in front of me

how (Un)lucky he looked dangerous...yippie

"good evening a splendid night isn't it"
I politely greeted the man

"indeed, I suppose you're here to force your way into the temple"
the un-named samurai responded composed

"naaa actually I just wanted to take a breath and walk on stairs...endless stairs made of stone"
darn! I always got sarcastic when I felt in danger.

"your petty lies cannot deceive me"
said amused the servant

"how bad, well may I ask your name"
I risen my shoulders and made an apologetic face

"Sasaki Koujiro Assassin servant"
he responded without hesitation

"well that was easier than I expected...shouldn't servants be more "concerned" about revealing their identities!"
I thought squaring the guy

I was at complete loss this Assassin didn't make any sense...but it was rude to not give my name too sooooo
"Nice to meet you...I guess...my name is "

"don't need to know, my blade will tell me all I have to "
Sasaki stated cutting my presentations

"Okay...such a cool line"
I muttered stepping back.

The fake Assassin and I with a silent agreement moved to the opposite sides of the stairs and without speaking a single word the Japane man assumed his fighting pose rising his elegant katana.
Moon...Crescent-Moon that was how I labelled the man I was about to fight: he was quiet, mysterious and his sword shone in the night reflecting the light of the moon.
Suppressing another anonymous feeling in my guts, I drew "Existence" my sword and assumed my fighting pose.

"Assassin are you watching?"
I whispered while my view was split in half by Existence

"yes...I got your back"

"good... ost-er ready in 3, 2, 1"
I said activating my favorite gadget

suddenly the Fairy tail theme bursted through the forest around me.

"NOW SASAKI KOUJIRO I DECLARE THIS DUEL ON!"
I stated reinforcing my legs and dashing towards my opponent...I was soo Hyped.

---

The battle began and so before I even made a single step I had already analysed my situation

First the zone; stairs encircled by wood, footwork proficiency reduced, might make use of it
Second escape route; No need I'm here to need and Hikigaya got my back
Third the opponent; Sasaki Koujiro, apart from his power with is sword I don't know anything about him, I will first study him through fighting.

Fast as lightning my feet moved on the ground and I opened the fight with a descending diagonal slash: an arithmetic and calculated movement totally opposed to my earlier speech .

*CLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANKKKK
my sword roared in the night clashing against my opponent's one.

"This is going to be enjoyable"
said Sasaki after taking effortlessly one of my mightiest slashes

"Show me what you got Red eyed man"
he continued pushing me away and starting the deadliest dancing I ever had the displeasure to dance.

Violet and light blue arcs left behind two blades, small sparkles those were the only thing Sasaki and I left behind us, as fought across all the stairs of the Ryuudo temple. slash after slash, swing after swing our blades restlessly clashed against one another, while our feet struggled to remain always in equilibrium on the various stone steps.
RIGHT, LEFT UP UP DOWN I kept dodging the sword of my opponent by an hair thin space. I had indeed the upper hand in speed and power thanks to the reinforcement magic, but the servant in front of me outclassed me too much in sword technique so I couldn't land a single strike.

avoiding a dangerous thrust to my chest with a backfilp down the stairs, I managed to obtain some distance from my opponent, one breath of relief and I was again parrying a deathly katana aimed towards my throat. A rain of sparkles bursted out the two katanas lighting me and my opponent. I didn't know why but we were both grinning.
In that moment I was clearly at disadvantage, my opponent was higher position and his mortal attacks kept falling on me like hailstones, I had to use all my swordman-ship and a good amount of reinforcement magic in order to avoid to be cut into pieces

*clank claclank clank claclacalclank

our two katanas resounded matching fairytail's theme...yeah for real.

"ah ah aahaha It's the first fight in a long time that makes me smile like this, two swordmen giving their all to kill each other"
said Koujiro with an ecstatic expression, the composed man of while ago was just a memory right now

"It's that so...*arf *arf"
I responded taking a few precious breaths

I didn't understand what made the fake Assassin so happy and I didn't care honestly. I just knew: I had to change the course of the battle and I had already received a great number of cuts from my opponent; none of them was serious but all the blood I was losing was going to become a problem soon.

"well I guess I have already studied him enough"
I thought while Sasaki's entire fight style had entered in my mind.

"it's time to take this fight more seriously"
I muttered changing the two-handed grip of my sword to a single-handed one

"Uh?"
groaned confused the fake Assassin. Apparently my gesture of gripping a katana with one hand left him more dismayed than I expected

"What are you doing?! Are you perhaps gone mad"
He asked... angry...angry really?... this dude, what was wrong with him I just changed my grip

"Just look"
I told him neutrally

And so without caring too much I stopped holding back.
Taking a deep breath I punched the centre my chest with my left fist, suddenly my panting stopped and from within my body a small tzz* sound could be heard.
In a second I felt my body grow warmer and warmer, as my heart...no Siegfried's heart was finally able to beat without an artificial valve to slow it down.

"Ready for the second round?"
I asked shooting out small lightnings of light green mana from my whole body (SSJ 2! or FULL COWL choose you) while all the cuts on my body healed in small flashes. Now I wanted to show him what happen when people try to create an artificial servant.

and so as the first part of my fight ended so did the sound in background...leaving space to the second ost of my playlist, also from Fairy tail, Lightning Flame Roaring Dragon

fitting wasn't it

---

(MEANWHILE )

"Oh the brat is getting serious"
said a creepy old man sat on a tree branch

In his dead eyes an amused sparkle of pride was observing his child grown into a warrior.

"Get him Sieg, you can do it, . "
he was softly clapping his hands

"Still opening the valve...the first time in three years, he might have some control problems"
Hikigaya Hachiman thought hypnotized by the small lightning his master was emitting

three years ago the the homunculus named Sieg suddenly started to accuse the illness knew as "Mana mutation"... more recognizable as "Yes we need a coffin".
A simple yet brutal disease that occurs whenever pure mana of a foreign individual is introduced in someones magic circuits; basically it makes the body self destruct, different magus knowing about this deathly sickness created dangerous weapons with the same principle: for example the Magus killer Kiritsugu Emiya and his feared origin bullets.

In Sieg's case the disease was caused by the heart implanted in his chest; that heart originally belonging to Siegfried was starting to mutate the homunculus's mana eroding day by day his magical circuits.
To avoid the worst the weirdest Master Servant duo emulated Donko of Libra from Saint Seiya; so with the help of an artificial valve they slowed down the heartbeat rate of the Master to the outmost limit in order to allow a slow and survivable alteration of Sieg's mana.

But now as the valve was open the heroic-homunculian mana (A/N damn it sound really bad) was free to flow and his unknown power was ready to burst

(A/N If you feel confused don't worry I just needed to spat out some "tecnical" information so I can add random power ups whenever I want ahahahahahahahahahahh...no really I spent a lot of time on this thing in order to make people say "Oh It makes kind of sense" when REAL fights arrive)

"better be ready if something strange happen..."Shizuka"
muttered the True Assassin servant enveloping himself in blue mana

"Now let me see how strong you have become master"
grinned the servant as the purple "V" in his eyes glittered

---

"I compliment you this power around you is really something, I gladly agree to a second round"
told me Sasaki Koujiro charmed by my power

This time I didn't waste time with stupid duel declaration or anything similar, 10, maybe 15 minutes, that was the time I could fight while using my mutant mana. The double of compared to the time I could fight with the card's power...Unfortunately with barely more than half of the power output.

Aware of my time limit I just re-opened the fight with same diagonal slash of a few minutes ago, but this time the movement wasn't precise or arithmetical... it was just savage. Faster than before I dashed towards Sasaki and again he effortlessly parried my blow...but this time I had still a hand free. Without any type of mercy I drove my enchanted left fist in my opponent's guts

*ugh
he grunted spitting blood while his whole body was propelled back.

"Fuck he is tough"
I said emotionless touching my bleeding left arm

That fake Assassin...he nearly cut off my arm as he was flying away with at least three ribs broken;

"really tough, besides second later and your arm would have been severed"
Sasaki remarked as Siegfried's glowing scar disappeared from my arm.

That gut he was a monster. Using his sword he managed to tear my skin of my arm before I managed to use Siegfried's Mana to protect the limb, it seemed I wasn't the only one that had stopped holding back.

"what kind of bizarre magecrafth you are using Red eyed man?"
he asked rising again his sword and charging at me

"Hikigaya switch in 70 seconds"
I said throwing all my flashbangs towards a single target...guess who.

"Roger"
my servant muttered in my earplugs as the whole area in front of me disappeared engulfed by white flashes.

*aarg
grunted Koujiro blinded by the sudden light...

---

It hurted to admit that as a swordman I was no match for this fake Assassin his technique was flawless his footwork admirable.
In a fair and square duel I doubt I would ever beat him...Luckly for me this was a war.

And I had no scruples to do whatever it took to survive and win.

"Logic path(Straße)/open(gehen)"
I chanted sending a destructive wave of magic in the ground

*CRAAAAASSHHHHHHHHHHHH

all the stone steps in the radius of four metres around me scattered turning in irregular pillars of rock. my plan was simple: opponent's large katana good with open spaces, opponent's fighting technique good with a solid ground to step on ...I take both away creating a new fighting ground.

It wasn't honorable or anything, it was just the best way to fight, the way Hikigaya Hachiman taught me.

running through the dust I charged Sasaki Koujiro. of course it wasn't a straight dash, It was an acrobatic choreography of steps and jumps on all the rock pillars, that like the quills of a hedgehog pierced the ground.

Flying from stone into stone I approached my opponent, I was just a light green line in the night, he could barely follow my chaotically precise movements. The blade in my hand had begun to shine of a faint blue as I slashed, thrust and swung it from every possible angolation against my opponet.
If the deadly dance I and Sasaki perforemed before was a refined Valzer then the one right now was a Break-dance demonstration.

*tin titn tin
our swords clashed, the disjointed ground I created was a terrible opponent for the fake assassin, his precise end elegant swings were just a pale memory; his feet sank in the ground and his nodaci stumbled upon each pillar of rock...he could display only a single drop of his true power. I on the other hand had stepped the game on another level; jumping and dashing on each stone and being able to freely use my left hand I could pull out a tridimensional storm of attacks unpredictable for practically anyone.

"time to shed some blood"
I thought as I threw a three knives towards the fake Assassin.

and they...they shining of my powerful mana...they...were cut down...just like that, one swing some craks* and done, Sasaki destroyed them, too bad... at least they were just meant as a decoy. Because I the mighty Sieg had already moved to assault my opponent from behind...such a strategist

Only a small detail perturbed my otherwise perfect plan

"Naive"

My action were seen through, so Sasaki turning himself in my direction drove his sword towards my throat.
Imagining the scene from a third viewer, I could see a clear picture of what was going on: me Jumping towards Koujiro performing a two handed slash leaving a blue tray behind me and then Koujiro just with his sword pointed towards my neck. A multitude of lines were trespassing my head while I slowly fell towards my death, many sounded like "good plan Sieg really good..." or "HIKIGAYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA", but all of them disappeared when I realized Sasaki had ACTIVATED MY TRAP CARD!

for a second, no less, I activated the saber card hidden in my breast pocket: my hair turned silver, Siegrfied's tribal armor covered my body and Existence shape-shifeted in Bahalmung.

swiiiiiin*
re-sounded Sasaki's katana that unable to pierce my enchanted skin just slipped off. Then without hesitation I swung the European great sword tracing a blue and crimson arc on Sasaki Koujiro's chest, the last thing I saw were his surprised eyes.

"arr"
groaned Sasaki Koujiro when I finally managed to injure him with my sword and his body crashed against a rock pillar.

"Yes"
I grinned landing in front of him and returning to my normal form.

I felt good, winning felt good, I was...happy, more than happy joyful, after all I just fought a servant on equal footing or nearly. I wasn't going to say "it was easy" or anything like that, I knew one mistake and I would have died even with Assassin backing me up. Still I was so thrilled about the result of my first fight that I didn't notice the ost-er had stopped playing music.

"Now I have just to finish him...yeah finish him...one swing of my katana and one foe less.
...easy right"
I thought gripping my sword so hard that my knuckles turned white.

rising Existence I pointed the blade towards the fake Assassin, the tip of the weapon was trebling, no I was trebling... and I didn't understand why. I couldn't move my arms.
Apparently for the second time since I was created and for first time in my life I was unwilling to kill an opponent.

"com'on one swing, one swing"
I muttered as Sasaki Koujiro started to move

Nothing to do, my body wouldn't collaborate...then I realized something terrifying

" I DON'T WANNA DIE IN THIS TANK was it?"

there wasn't a single sound around me

and the voice had come to pay a visit

---

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
I screamed as I lost control of my mana and turned in a green star for a moment

"one sentence, the voice needed one sentence to defeat me"
I thought falling on my knees

"kukukukukukuaahahahahahahhahaha"
laughed Sasaki freeing himself from the pillar of rock

"I don't know what happened, but it seems you pushed yourself too hard red eyed man"
he said grabbing his sword and walking in front of me.

"Since you are the first worthy opponent I had been summoned in this era I shall give you the onor to perish under my mightiest technique"
the fake Assassin covered in blood rose his sword

"I also like the onor of being let go"
I tried to say, but instead of words from my mouth came out only blood. Releasing my the valve and using the card had put too much strain on my body.

I attempted to stand up, but there was nothing to do I was too tired...bitterness and pain that was how defeat was like?

"may your soul go in a better place"
stated Sasaki kojiro Swinging his sword...unfortunately for him 70 seconds had passed

"Hiken Tsubame Gaeshi"

Unleashed his technique the fake Assassin

I could only see three violet lines, before my servant jumped in front of me to save my life.

*swiin
*swiin
*swiin

with three distinct sounds the blade of the fake assassin bounced against the real Assassin's white lab coat, Hikigaya's only defensive Noble Phantasm the Silent Coat (Shizukana kōto).

everything happened too fast Sasaki Kojiro didn't even have time to understand what was going on when Hikigaya Hachiman

" Absolute"

as I labelled him, unlashed a white bright fist in the samurai's face

"SHIZUKA SHINKANSEN"

*BBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
an ultra-sonic roar pained my ears and Sasaki kojiro was propelled in the wood at frightening speed.

"So how was your first fight brat?"
asked my servant while all the white light he had in his fist returned the in lab coat currently pitch black.

"Intense"
I managed to groan slowly standing up and re-closing my heart valve.

---

(15 minutes later)

" what did we obtain tonight?"
I asked pressing myself in the passenger seat of my black prius

"well you got a first taste of the battle field."
Assassin answered from the driver seat

"...I can't exactly feel positive about it, we didn't even managed to kill the fake Assassin"
I groaned hiding my face in my arms

" that's indeed a pity, after all Caster showed up before we could end him, but at least he won't be able to fight properly for a while.
Hikigaya comforted? me

"yeah...still I can't believe you managed to make your can fall on Caster's head"
I tried to switch topic from my failures to something else

"that's not that impressive brat after all I just started to jump around the wood while she followed me shooting magic randomly, waited for the right moment and BAM a cranial contusion from a can heavy three quintals"
Assassin happily tappered his fingers on the steering wheel

---

Flashback

"DIE !"

*sound of magical exposions...babababababababababaammmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

"why don't you have a drink Caster"

*sound of an obese can falling from a tree branch and hitting a flying witch on her head STUN

---

"It's a mystery how she survived though"
I continued

"what about...magic brat? "

" perhaps...at least we confirmed she comes Greece and not Egypt, have you seen her robe right"

"yes I have seen..."

"..."

"ehm master what happened during the fight with that Assassin?"

"Don't wanna talk about it"

"as you wish...still it wouldn't have happened if you had gotten serious from the beginning, seems like I have to beat in your head still a few lessons"

"Ah?! what do you mean by that?"

"brat you had at least three move to give checkmate to him and besides you did the typical FYHAG."

"FYHAG"

" Forgot You Had A Gun "

"I'm a fucking idiot!"

"plus You are still too proud, you have to accept that during battle to death pride is useless, just spit blood in their face like you did this morning.

"if you say so old man, besides"

"yes?"

"if you don't turn here we are past our block"

"SHIT!"

---

"Honey I'm home"
I entered in my house still with my battle suit sword gun and...my wife was on the floor

WHY MY WIFE WAS ON THE FLOOR!

"JEANNE"
I screamed rushing beside her

"Assassin quick something is wrong with her!"
I called for help.

she was cold and her eyes were semi-closed. I embraced her sitting on the floor

"look at me, you're okay right? HIKIGAYA"
I continued scared

"what's wrong Masterrrrrr oh I see it finally happened"
arrived Assassin too calm for my tastes

"wait here brat she's suffering from lack of mana"
he said walking in his room

"lack of mana how is it possible, after the war began the grail was sustain her summoning and I kept giving her my blood"
I thought while Jeanne slowly started to regain consciousness

"S-sieg welcome"
she muttered in my arms with a faint smile

"Sssshssshss don't talk now just keep looking at me"
I said tightening my arms as Jeanne nodded

I waited two endless seconds before my servant arrived with two objects in his hands

"Okay here we have all the stuff I prepared for this situation"
Hikigaya said putting on the table a silver can and small plastic jar

"Can you explain why in the hell you're so calm and act like you know everything...stupid question of course you know everything what's going on?!"
I screamed one step away from a nervous crisis

"I already told you she's suffering lack of mana, here drink this"
Hachiman arrived with the silver can in his hand.

"glugluglugluglu, shouldn't have the problem been solved once the war started?...was that redbull?"

"No and Yes, The Grail didn't consider Jeanne's ruler function useful anymore so her summoning isn't sustained right now, I noticed a few days ago, but when I tried to tell you she used one of her command seals to stop me"

---

(Flashback)

"your condition have worsen this much Ruler?"

"yeah the Grail isn't providing any mana"

"well better tell to your Mana dispenser about this thing"

"STOP don't tell him"

"... . . .gamine"

"if he know about this he will give me all the mana he has got, it might be a fatal mistake in a fight."

"Yes...but don't tell him is stupid and dangerous"

"LISTEN! if he knows about this you know what's going to happen?"

"He will become reckless and try to win the war as fast as he could to save you?"

"he will become..."

"..."

"you could tell?"

"...I have raised that child, how do you expect I couldn't tell"

"then why don't you agree with me?"

"first I raised you too in these past nine years, second I'm not enough a hypocrite to stop him"

"you forced my hand Hikigaya with my authority as a Ruler I command you to not reveal my secret to my husband"

*sound of red mana binding an Assassin with a "really?" expression

---

"and so this is how it went...apparently when you saw her the command seal stopped working, you can't reveal something that is already known uh"
Assassin explained to me opening the plastic jar and bringing one pill to me

"so what do we do now"
I asked taking Hikigaya's blue pill in my hand

"We nothing, you have marital obligations and I'm going to sleep outside tonight"
Hachiman said leaving the attic

" What did he mean...oh I see"
I said staring at the pill in my hand...it was Viagra

two seconds later i had already princess-carried Jeanne on our bed and gulped another can of red bull.

"Siegfired endurance level A I trust you"
I said swallowing the pill

---

( a few HOURS?! and a BROKEN BED?! later)

"af af man-af replenished for at least a week"
I said sweaty and unable to feel my legs

"dear God af af"
my wife resounded in a situation similar to mine

"Fiuuu"
"Fiuuu"
we sighed in the same time

exausted, we sank in each other arms on waht remained of our bed...it was the third we changed in the past three months

"I will do whatever it takes to win the Grail Jeanne"
I said passing her golden hair through my fingers

"please just be careful"
she kissed my hand

"of course dattebayo I have still too many things to do and chapters of One piece to read"
I spit some Shounen bullshit to sound confident

"I think you just triggered one or two eh... death flags"
she tried to follow my nerdy style...so cute

"who knows"
I muttered closing my eyes

---

THE NIGHTMARE I

Fighting
Everyone fight for something, it can be for abstract things like an ideal, or maybe more things materialistic like an object, money etc the list goes on .
From my perspective anyone who decided to fight was someone must I respect...
or at least it was what I thought until ten seconds ago.

"Next Wednesday at the public pool all your favorite Seiyuus will participate to a free swimming lesson for all your children, come on numerous...Again what did you want Two-san to do?"
I asked putting a leaflet on the table in front of me

"We I'd like Two-dono to take pictures of all the Seiyuus in their swimsuits and we will double the pay if we get a picture while they are changing in the lockers"
said an Obese man on the other side of the table

"I see...just to know who was from Idol Stream that told you how to contact me"
I said easygoingly shifting my attention to the BigMC the fat Otaku just treated me.

nothing tasted better than free food.

"The secretary Kirishima-san, she is my cousin, she told me that to contact Two-dono I had to speak with a long haired elementary school grader, you Ninsei-kun, and that you always did lunch here after a delivery "
the man named...I-don't-remeber-kun continued starting to chew his fries.

" well this explain why he was following me, should I ask Idol stream to fire her...na I don't have any authority "
I thought .

Today was a usual Saturday for me, I had just completed my weekly delivery to Idol Stream and went to have dinner when this man sat at my table and talked about hiring me...I mean Two-san. Otaku-kun as I decided to call him was apparently the chief of the Seiyuu section of a magazine named "AnimHey!", a terrible name in my opinion, and was searching a good photographer for that pool event.

"Two has finally a reputation, Now finding jobs will be easier ehehe"
I giggled biting my hamburger.

"Now what kind of facade is better with him, mature...no, naive...yeah but not too much, let's go with a undecided and innocent."
I thought setting the right speech to manipulate better Otaku-kun

"I-I don't know isn't peeping bad"
I started pouting

"W-w-what, No! I mean yes, I mean...maybe, that's not the point"
Began to mutter the large man in front of me

"...then what's the point Oni-san, I don't like to not understand thing"
I puffed my cheeks as childishly as I could

"Listen kiddo i just want you to talk about this job to Two-san, here is my business card give it to him"
Rushed away the man before his brain made him realize he was a creep.

well at least he left behind the fries, more food for me LUCKY. Eating alone in that small McDonald just outside the industrial area for the first time in a whole week allowed myself to relax, there were no more bills to pay, people to stalk or photo to deliver and I had finally completed my list of things to do, yet there was still something bothering me...

"I should have asked a happy meal instead of a BigMC, no Nijito you don't need that Pokemon toy you don't need it"
I mumbled consuming my lunch.

---

FlashForward

"Hey I know you're here! Come out I need you...please"

"ah you're here...on your own... why do you need me?"

---

"And with this I have reached my calories quota for today, thank God cheap food exists "
I said cheerfully coming out from the McDonald

I didn't had any plans for today, so after eating lunch I began to wonder around the streets of my city with no destination in mind.

"straight, behind, left or right?"
I said each time I encountered a crossroad in order to decide where I should have gone.

Straight, left, straight, right
I decided choosing every time the road with less people...I didn't like crowds.
Unfortunately Saturdays weren't exactly the best days to avoid all the human beings heading out to do their weekly shopping.

"Too many people too many people"
I madly muttered walking beside swarms of fellows Homo sapiens..

It took me a while, but I eventually grew tired of walking on those crowdy roads and went to seat on the first bench I saw.
Or at least that was my intention until I saw something a sky scraper in construction on the side of the road.
Nothing I would usually get concerned about, yet the writing YUKINOSHITA CORP on the side of the building made me remember a conversation I had a few days ago

---

FLASHBACK

"Bakkin might be lying boya about all this- Deliver Kori Yukinoshita's secret packs-"
"Yes, but if he is not..."
"what?"

---

"Yukinoshita corp uh?"
I said coolly staring at the building

"I feel the smell of a scoop"
I whispered grinning as I decided my plans for that afternoon

going to my favorite place of the whole city; the public library.

---

Why the public library? you ask
why is that high and old building right before the shopping district your favorite place in the whole city? You ask
Well the answers are many, the books, the peace the ... who am I kidding
Air conditioner
the air conditioner during summer and the warming system during winter.
those were the reason why I loved the library so much, sure I loved books, but that divine sensation of GRATIS coolness and warmth was irresistible for me.

"Hello Oba-chan"
I said entering in the library and stopping in front of the old librarian's

"Ah Nijito-kun it's been a while, have you grown taller? oh your hair have gotten so long"
responded the white haired woman brushing aside her half finished bento

"yeah nearly a month"
I softly smiled without bothering to raise a facade.

among all the people I knew this Oba-san here was the most harmless, so even if I let her see I wasn't the kind of child people are used to, it wasn't a big deal. At worst she was gonna say something to her nieces like "I met a peculiar boy of your age hohohohohoho"

"What can I do for you"
she smiled...and she was missing a few teeth

I didn't like how she smiled, but i guess it was just a personal opinion.

"I'd like to read some old news paper"
I said spreading my arms

" I see you always want to read strange stuff, mmmm how old do you want them"
she asked as a pair small eyes appeared from under that thick blanket of wrinkles Oba-san had on her face

"eh..from Three years ago when the Yukinoshita conglomerate started to grow "

"that's quite specific Nijito-kun"
said the woman squaring me

"I need to do some researches for an acquaintance"
I lied while a small memory flashed in front of my eyes

---

FLASHBACK

"A powerful man such as Kori Yukinoshita What can possibly want Bakkin to deliver?"

"Who Knows NI, who knows.."

---

I didn't hope to deceive her I just wanted to send the clear message NOT YOUR BUSINESS in the most polite way possible.
for a moment the Oba-san seemed ready to ask me some questions, but in the end she just risen her shoulder and said
"I see..."

well follow me "
the old woman said standing up from her chair with a squeek

"Sure"
I said walking by her side.

As we moved through in the empty library the only sounds I could hear were our steps resounding lonely and the noise of a random cars passing near by.
enjoying those moments of quietness, I filled my lungs with the paper smelling air of the building; for some reasons I found it incredibly relaxing, each breath was like a weight was taken off my shoulder. Here I could forget for a short time about my family, my job, the future and just lose myself in seas of words.

"let's see news papers, news papers news paper...ah there they are"
said Oba-san pointing towards a dusty box

standing on her tip toes she extended her arms trying to reach the cartoon box. Unfortunately the box was on the top of a bookcase, so it was a few inches away the old woman grasp. Oba-san tried a few times to reach the box, managing at the end to put her hand on it, however I could see her position was really precarious.

"Oba-chan wait let me grab you a chair"
I said before something bad happened but...

*svraam
The law of Murphy was faster than me.

In a second the only acquaintance I never once despised was falling on the ground along with the cartoon box. To that sight my feet moved on their own, in one instinctive movement I dashed to grab the old woman while dozens of yellowed paper scattered through the air.

" are you okay Oba-chan"
I asked struggling to hold up the librarian that was yes lighter then I expected, but still heavy for a seven years.

"Ohhohohoh I'm fine Nijito-kun, this silly Obaa-san slipped, you can let me go I will stand on my own"
She said with a strange smile and patting my head

"...Yes"
I said following her orders
with great care I slowly let go Oba-san's right shoulder and left arm.

"thank you, you're pretty strong young boy"
She told me massaging where I grabbed her.

"No what do you say"
I responded moving my hand in front of my face trying to brush aside the topic

"I'm on..ly av..er...a...ge"
I whispered struggling to make words come out of my mouth as my eyes indulged on something;

Four purple faint lines on Oba-san's forearm...

"I had grabbed her more intensely than I imagined"
I thought staring at my hand...fro some reason it was trebling

What had I done?

"I'm sorr-"

"Ah don't bother you wanted to avoid this Oba-san fell on the floor right? Besides is not your fault is just this body of mine that is frailer than it used to be, Ok?"
She motherly patted on my head once more

"Ok..."
I sulked staring at my feet

"Good boy, now why don't you read your news paper and stop thinking about this stupid incident "
Oba-chan moved aside from my eyes a dark hairlock and smiled once more with all the teeth she had left.

I really didn't like how she smiled, but I when she smiled it was nice.

---

"I-I-I...I want something"

"That's not a surprise also the other one had something he wanted, you know what it was?"

---

"So...from all these newspaper I know that: Kori Tomi became the a possible C.E.O of the Yukinoshita corp, Marrying the daughter of the previous company head, this 11 years ago, eight years later he managed to create a procurement empire worth over a billion Yen"
I repeated playing with an hairlock

...

"this explain nothing I want to know"
I pulled my hair crushing on the table in front of me.

Fifteen minutes to pick up all the flying news papers, other thirty to put everything in chronologicaly, two hours of reading and nothing. I found absolutely NOTHING ,I just broke my sacred rule of avoid to work in library for NOTHING worthy of my attention: not a scandal nor an accuse of corruption, just a ridiculous number of building his society built around the city...

"And that was only three years ago by now he must have at least doubled the number"
I mumbled while the light of the afternoon gently caressed my head.

"Guess there is no, material for a scoop..."
I whispered rearranging the yellow papers

It wasn't like I had nothing to work on, I had precisely NOTHING to work on.

"A big company like his and not even a rumors is too weird to be true..."
I told myself starting to put back in their box all the news papers

"the option are two: Bakking was lying or Yukinoshita know too well how to hide any shady business
In the first case I wasted two hours I could have used to read something more funny "
I thought lifting the cartoon box and began to walk

burdened by the weight of knowledge I clumsily moved through the hallway of the library, as an ominous thought took shape in my mind. With each step I made the words in my brain, I didn't dare to speak reached my mouth with bitter sensation.

"and in the second...It's not someone I want to mess with"
I finally said in no more than a whisper

I knew how dangerous people could become to hide the truth or to find it, It was something I learned soon after starting to take my pictures, in seven years of life I had already seen more screaming madmen and women with a random weapon than I'd ever wanted to.
All of them had something to hide, all of them were ready to do things even worse to avoid their secret leaked...
I didn't understand them, nor I ever want to...
Still I was thankful to them, they made me realize that fake people have an imagine to mantain while real people just don't care.
A simple lesson that allowed me to recognize potentially dangerous people.

"What did I want to get involved with?"
I groaned breathing heavily

not even the smell of paper seemed to calm me down.

So disappointed from my fruitless afternoon I left the cartoon in front of Oba-san's desk box and got out from the library.
Outside the city seemed empty I could just see two or three people walking around

"well I guess I have nothing to do until sunset"
I said with lonely voice putting my hands in my pockets

"mmm what is this?"
I said feeling something strange in my right hand.

it was something thin and rigid...a card perhaps? With a slow motion I draw the object from my pocket and guess what it was a card Horray! The Business card the fat Otaku gave me during lunch.

"Okay...I already threw away my pride, besides work is work"
I said after staring at the small rectangular piece of hard paper for a Loooooooooong moment.

---

"he wanted to sleep"

"wrong...sleep is what he wanted after surrendering, what did he fight for? What did he live for?"

---

After my trip in the library I spent the next few days in complete calm following my daily routine.
I woke up, I cooked, I ate, I worked, I ate, I worked again, ate again, studied things that might turn out to be useful and went to sleep.
It wasn't an easy life style, but with its monotony gave me security.

" it's time to get up it's time to get up"
My alarm started to resound one morning

"Time to get up"
I muttered with my eyes still closed

With one lazy movement I snoozed the alarm

"OH It is six AM, I have probably SIX WHOLE hours…incredible how long it has been since I managed to do it, today must a great day a great Wednesday"
I said rolling out of my bed covered in my favorite books

with careful steps and an unnatural smile on my lips I got down stairs, I was really in a good mood I even allowed myself to whistle, of course my parents were nowhere to be seen so was imotou-chan, but really who cared I couldn't begin to sulk over common occurences

"...right?"
I muttered losing my cheerfulness for a moment

Cooking the usual breakfast for the family I started to hum a simple song I learned at nursery school

"today is Monday and I will do to play
today is Tuesday and I will go to the bay"

Unfortunately my killjoy brain reminded me of one tiny detail

"today is Wednsday...and ...I have something to do?"

with one hummed sentence all my happiness disappeared...I had to wait three long second before

"I have to go at the swimming pool to work..."
the cruel reality punched my face.

ten minutes later
I opened a small door while a few sweat drops adorned my forehead like tiny gems.

"I don't wanna do it, I don't wanna do it"
I muttered facing the mirror in my bathroom with my hands full of clothe

"okay Nijito you have to do this"

"but I don't wanna"

"it was your Idea"

"no it was your idea"

"you're talking to your reflection"

"maybe I should sleep more"

"yeah maybe.."

"..."

"just dress like a girl and go to make money"

"FINE!"
I finally screamed losing(?) an argument against myself

So with slow and mechanical movements I began to change.
It was horrible, wearing the skirt the leggings and T-shirt I bought nearly a week ago... don't make me start with tieing my hair into two twin tails with two pink hairbands( I mean how can girl do it, it's insanely difficult).
Sure it wasn't the most traumatizing thing I ever done but it was still in the top 10...no top 5, after seeing an old woman and an old lawyer doing kinky stuff, all the other R rated scenes worth nothing.

---

"I don't understand..."

"Really... you don't understand your own existence"

---

"Attention please the free swimming lesson is about to begin, if you haven't registered yourself yet hurry!"
a voice exclaimed loud from a speaker

"dammit why is everything so noisy and crowdy"
I thought walking quietly in the enormous line of people in front of me.

Arriving fifteen minutes early; a simple trick I used imagination It would have saved me lines, crowds and noise...how wrong I was.
From the moment I arrived till now the whole swimming pool had been filled by too many human beings. I couldn't understand what bothered me the most the noise, the smell of clorum, the hottness or the smell of sweat, I just knew one thing it was suffocating

"Hey stop Pushing"
someone screamed as I was squashed between a dad and a girl about my age

"... why I couldn't find another job...why did I accepted this"
I mumbled gripping as hard as I could my PreCure backpack.

"This is probably my most difficult task yet"
I thought trying to separate myself from the world surrounding me

I did many unpleasant thing for money in my seven years of live, but I had yet to feel so humiliated and overdriven.
I had already to dress like a girl to enter in the girl's changing room, why couldn't the universe help me instead of doing everything possible to annoy me...

"I'm scared of crowds..."
I shamefully squeezed my eyes imagining to be in the library,

"yeah the quiet library"
I said regaining a bit of my cool and finally managing to detach from the world

---

"STOP WITH THIS POINTLESS CRAP! I JUST WANT YOUR STRENGTH"

"oh finally losing your losing your quiet mask Nijito?"

---

I didn't know how much time had passed since I entered in my personal Nirvana, after what could have been minutes or hours a feminine voice called me

"hello young girl what's your name"
said a man in his thirties

"YES MY PERFECT DISGUISE WORKED...Still why the hell is voice his so feminine!"
I joyously thought staring at the japanese man seated on behind a desk

"excuse me Ojou-chan I can't make register you in the free swimming lesson if you don't tell me your name"
The man spoke again making me realize one thing...

I had prepared everything: the clothes, the school swimsuit, my cameras, but I forgot to think a name

"Ni...shi..n..a? Yes my name is Nishina Karuizawa"
I spat in the heat of the moment

"Can you write it down there"
he responded handing me a pen and a paper sheet

"Sure"
I wrote embarrassed with a few quick movements of the pen

"oh you write pretty well from a girl of your age"
Said the man impressed by my calligraphy

"I practiced a lot mister Totsu... I can't read the rest of the tag"
I responded trying to read the man's name half hidden by his hand

"Just call me Saikaku, Nishina-chan, but now you'd better hurry up and change into your swimsuit the lesson is about to start"
man said with his feminine voice

"Of course Saikaku-san"
I waved my hand running towards the girls changing room...

"this is going to be tiring"
I muttered opening the door

---

"Just stop already what do you want"

"an answer just one answer"

---

"So first thing find the Seiyuus then accidentally bump in them while they are changing and try to take some pictures with the camera I hid in my skirt"
I planned entering in the changing.

I have to say that at the beginning I wasn't particularly embarrassed, I mean all the girls in that room were about my age and half of them were tomboys, so there wasn't nothing for me to worry about.

the real problems arrived when the girls in the changing room began to mutter behind my back terrible things like
"look at eyebags they are so weird"
or
"Just how old are the hairbands she's using"

I wasn't knowledgeable about the social dynamics between girls and I didn't know if it was a common thing criticize the first person you saw ...but why were they so mean?
Of course I wasn't offended or anything, I didn't cry, you were crying and for sure I didn't start to aimlessly run found eight naked Seyuus in a private changing room I casually entered into...I just walked away from those noisy girl and entered in a room where by coincidence the Seyuus were changing

(Actually all that stuff totally happened)

"OH Crap!"
was my first thought when I found myself in front of my targets without any kind of plan

"What are you doing you here?"
Said one of the young women in before my eyes

She was the tiniest among them and had pink dyed hair.

"Uh...uh"
I mumbled trying to find the right facade for the occasion

"Okay let's see I'm Nishina I have just been bullied because my eye bags so I guess...I was too excited to met my heroines and didn't slept at all, plus I'm shy so i run away from those girls"
I tought crafting a new mask on the spot while forcing some tears out of my eyes

"Hey little girl why are you crying, tell it to Chitose One-chan"
the same Seyuu from before advanced boldly reaching me with a warm smile

It took me a second to recognize her:
"Chitose Karasuma voice actress from Number One Produce. She is the voice of Yuna, one of the five main heroines in the upcoming anime series Millennium Princess x Kowloon Overlord. She has a positive attitude and high confidence."
said in my mind remembering all the researches I did in the past few days

"an easy target good"
I whispered putting my hand on my hidden camera and starting to cough

"All the ...all the...al the girl in that room were talking behind my back"
I pathetically sighed while some fake tears fell on my cheeks

"Really"
The girl said embracing me...what a peculiar sensation

"they were all saying look at her eyebags so creepy...it's not my fault if I was too excited to sleep yesterday"
I continued sinking in her arms while in my mind I was just praying "Take the bait take the bait"

"Oh that's terrible"

"YES! ...I mean yes very terrible"

"Hey you know what why don't you tell me your name?"

"N-Nishina"

"I see I see, Nishina-chan you said you were too excited to sleep because of us right"
Said Karasuma Chitose pointing her tiny index on all the other girls in the room

"Y-yes"
I muttered trying to blush...unfortunately it was a technique I had yet to master.
so I just puffed my cheeks and hold my breath, it wasn't subtle like I hoped but it worked

" Would you like to introduce to all of us one on one"
The girl asked grinning

"Really!
...too easy"
I said as happily as I could

"Sure right girl?"
Karasuma-san proclaimed confident

"I don't mind"
"Fine"
"Why not"
"Actuall-"

"See all the girls are okay with that, Now follow your Chitose One-sama"
the still naked girl stated dragging me along.

"Money I'm coming"
I thought while all the plans I didn't planned worked out

---

" an answer..."

"yeah tell me for what did the first Nijito fight for?"

---

Roughly 55 photos later I had almost completed my job.
I'd been lying if I said That I had no problem to introduce myself to a bunch of half or completely naked women, still I managed to finish my task without screwing up and left the Seyuus's changing room with an excuse.
Closing the room's door behind my back I headed towards the toilettes with carefree pace.

"Okay now the difficult part is done"
I whispered checking the photos I made after closing myself in one of the bathrooms

many of the photos I took were blurry, but I still had a great number of pictures worth selling

"Good, now I have just to do this free lesson and go home"
I thought turning off the camera and putting it in my backpack

Then with swift mechanical movement I got changed in the school swim suit I bought for the occassion...Why did my life sucked so much?
It took me a lot of mental strength and a few tears, but I managed to wear that atrocious piece of cloth.

"this day has officially gone in the top 4 of my most traumatic experiences"
I groaned coming out from the toilettes.

Now I just hoped to go through the rest of the afternoon without anything else to worry about, unfortunately

"Nishina-chan there you are the lesson is about to start come with me"
an overly cheerful voice actress caught my arm as soon I came out from the restroom.

"Karasuma-saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn?"
I screamed while she dashed towards the pool with me still in her hands

this day is never going to end right!

---

"Everyone WELCOME TO YOUR SWIMMING LESSON WITH YOUR FAVORITE SEYUUS, I'M CHITOSE KARASUMA AND I ASK YOU: ARE YOU EXCITED?"

"YEEEESSSS!"

"I DIDN'T HEARD YOU!"

"YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!"

"GOOD NOW LET'S DO SOME STRECHING! JUST FOLLOW ME AND MY COLLEGUES AND MY LOVELY ASSISTANT NISHINA-CHAN "

"YEAAAAAHHHH"

"DO YOU WANT TO SAY SOMETHING NISHINA?"

"fuck my life... I mean LET'S HAVE FUN TOGETHER"

---

(two hours later)

"At last I'm freeeeeeee"
I screamed after two looooooooong hours of torture receiving a bunch of weird stares from the people around me on the bus.

I knew I should have remained more quiet but really, I thought that after taking the M rated pictures my worry were gone and what happened?
I became the Karasuma-san's personal assistant and guinea pig for a whole after noon

"Nishina-chan let's show them this excercise, Nishina-chan why are you so flexible?, Nishina-chan you swim so fast, Nishina-chan how can this be the first time you swam?,Nishina-chan you have a camera with you let's take a picture together.
Why didn't she just leave me alone already, I'm not good with people giving me attention geez"
I muttered while the face of the upbeat voice actress appeared in my mind

for a second my lips tunrned upwards, I didn't know the last time I had so much fun

"it's a pity though...making money on someone else's kindness"
I then thought while my lips returned to their usual position and a sense of uneasiness enveloped my heart.

for the rest of the bus trip I didn't speak ot think a single word, I just tried to ignore the strange feeling swirling in my chest. It was the first time I ever took photographs of people who had been kind to me and...well it was also the first time I thought not to deliver my pictures.
After all those girls had done nothing wrong, they didn't keep hidden anything terrible...the only mistake they made was trusting me.

After my ride ended I came down from the bus, and still dressed like a girl I headed towards my home.
With each step I took the uneasiness I felt in my heart grew, swelling like a balloon.
I really didn't knew what to do in order to ignore that annoying feeling, I was facing emotions I had never dealt with before and incapable to address them I just did the only thing that always get me out of trouble.

Put on a mask

"Some one carefree, someone without an hint of doubt"
I thought crafting the best persona for my situation

"Wow It's the most embarrassing thing I have ever done"
I declared playing with my hair and re-starting to walk

"But it was damn worthy with my photos I will make a bunch of money better celebrate "
I smiled reaching the vending machine in the park near my home

I had worked pretty hard today so I believed it was the case to reward myself with some sleep substitute: COFFEE
Throwing some coins in the machine I bought a warm can of coffee, then hopping on one leg for some reason I reached a bench and opened the can.

"and here we go"
I said as the bitter smell of coffee penetrated in my nose

slowly moving my hands up I rose the can to my lips like nothing was wrong in the world, after all it was like that...there was nothing wrong...

"Am I a bad person?"
I asked myself as my stomach twisted and I became unable to rise the can any further

"Naa I'm a good guy I-I have just a few problems...right?"
I muttered while my newly crafted mask shattered in a thousand pieces.

suddenly my hands started to tremble and the only smell of coffee was revolting my guts

"Dammit"
I grunted throwing away the can

"What the fuck is wrong with me? I didn't do anything wrong "
I started to mutter putting my hands on my head and pulling my hairs still tied in two pony-tails

"I don't do this because I like it "
I tightened my teeth

"Why do I feel so..."
tears began to flow and my eyes stared at the metallic can I just threw

Guilty
In an instant all my emotion ceased to exist

"Oh so that's the feeling"
I whispered watching the aluminium object

"So I never twist al those can out of guilt...peculiar"
I said regaining my cool.

---

"..He...I...Fought for approval"

"very well you start to speak my language now... tell me why"

---

After snapping I remained sat on that bench...for well I didn't know how long, asking myself over and over

"Should I sell those pictures?, is it right what I'm doing? If this is guilt what I have felt until now"

yet for some reason each time I thought those questions the answers seemed further from me.
I stayed on that bench unable to answer until evening arrived with a wave of chilly air, responding to the change of temperature my bones began to shiver and I felt goose bumps.
Honestly didn't care too much about the cold, but I was well aware that I could afford to get sick, I had my family and job to look after.

So making recourse to all power of will stood up from the bench, still answerless, confused and broken.

"just another step"
I repeated to myself while I dragged my feet towards home

Still my body seemed to ignore all the orders I gave and every single step required me an insane amount of effort.
I was so focused on walking that I accidentally bump into a random dude

*tun

"Oh I'm sorry..."
I said facing the teenager that turned out to be one of my aquitainces...Bakkin

"Look were you are walking brat"
the boy snapped pushing me away

Bakkin had always been the violent type so I wasn't even surprised when he pushed me with his big hands and I also managed to remain on my own feet.

"STOP !"
I then screamed pointing my index towards the guy

usually I would have just let him go away without doing anything, after all I avoided meaningless trouble...but this time something was different, because I saw an object that appeared only in my nightmares: a orange letter with a red seal on it.

I just had to stare at the letter for one second...and the last spark of sanity in me disappeared

---

"Because approval was the only thing he ever sought, he wanted to be accepted from his family... by anyone else"

"and that's what created you..."

---

As soon as I exploded my brain stopped to work properly

"GET THE LETTER GET THE LETTER GET THE LETTER"
was the only thing I could think while I dashed against a confused teenager like an angry animal.

The next second of my life felt like some kind of dream:
First I ran against Bakkin trying to snatch the letter while my hands tightened like hydraulic clamps around his left wrist and the boy grunted painfully.
In response to my assault Bakkin recovered from the initial shock, started to punch me with his free hand: one, two, three, four blows stuck in my face breaking my lips and bruising all my cheecks, of course they hurted me God knows how much, but all my useless sensations had been shot down so I just ignored the pain and twisted Bakkin's wrist as hard as I could.
The teenager groaned again, no this time he actually screamed from the pain I was inflicting him and in order to drive me away he began to kick me with all his might.
I only managed to endure two of them before the third one collided with my stomach and made me lose the grip on Bakkin's wrist.

*UGH
I groaned shamefully falling on the ground.

my mouth tasted of blood and there wasn't a single part of me that wasn't screaming in pain. Rolling on my right side I tried to stand up and re-start my assault, but before I could a powerful kick connected to my ribs

*GHA
I spitas all the air I had in my lungs escaped

"DO YOU LIKE THAT BRAT"
screamed Bakkin kicking me again

"JUST WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU, ATTACKING ME ?! WERE YOU ASKING FOR A LESSON GIRL?"
he continued kicking me again in the ribs.

After receiving that blow, I felt a faint spark of awareness return to me

"...Just what the hell I did?"
I questioned myself while another kick approached my torso.

I tried to dodge it, but I was too slow and Bakkin's foot still managed to hit my abdominal area;

"WAAAAAAAA"
I screamed while I could literally feel bruises form moment after moment on my skin.

Fortunately for me Bakkin was caught in surprise by my sudden scream hesitated one second to draw back his leg, one second that I used to bit his ankle with all the strength I had left in my jaw...it felt strangely pleasant taste someone else's blood instead of mine

"BITCH"
The teenager roared drawing a small knife from his pocket.

Realizing what was going to happen I let go Bakkin's ankle and rose my right hand in order to stop a silver arc descending upon me.

"bizzarre...I guess I can't win...but maybe I can win"
I thought while the metallic blade of the angry teenager pierced through my palm.

suddenly the world around me ceased to exist and I found myself in my native land...a nameless desert.

---

"So I'm here again "
I said staring at my bleeding

Around me there was nothing just a dunes of golden sand and a body lying on the ground a few metres away.
Without knowing what to do I walked for a bit on that dry land, with each step I took I gradually became more aware of a presence around me and at some point I stopped to walk waiting nearly an eternity for the presence to say something.

"Hey I know you're here! Come out I need you...please"
I screamed once I eventually grew tired of waiting

at first I wanted to sound confident and proud...but I just end up praying for help and in waiting again

"ah you're here...all on your own... why do you need me?"
a cold voice said behind me

It was a voice that I knew pretty well, after all it was my own, but I couldn't help but shiver listening to those arctic words

"I-I-I...I want something"
I trembled unable to turn towards the voice

"That's not a surprise, also the other one had something he wanted, you know what it was?"
asked me the voice closing the distance between us with some quiet steps

Each time his feet moved I could feel my heart on the brink of explosion, so to calm down I put on one of my masks
I waited a bit before answering, I wanted to be sure to know who was "the other one", but given the place there was only an option

"he wanted to sleep"
I said calmly still giving my back to the voice

"wrong...sleep is what he wanted after surrendering, what did he fight for? What did he live for?"
The voice retorted vehement and cold

"I don't understand..."
I muttered caught aback by it's statement

"Really... you don't understand your own existence"
the voice mocked at me, shattering my composed mask, making me feel the same...rage I had in me when I was attacking Bakkin

"STOP WITH THIS POINTLESS CRAP! I JUST WANT YOUR STRENGTH"
I roared turning towards the voice

"oh finally losing your losing your quiet mask Nijito?"
smiled another me, when I finally faced him

Starring at him I suddenly felt empty, all the anger, all the fury in my heart evaporated and only a hollow sensation remained in my chest.

He was my perfect copy but, I was still disguised like a girl full of bruises and had my wounded while he was enveloped in a white robe and was free from any injuries.

"Just stop with your mind already, what do you want? "
I asked after humming my dry lips

"an answer just one answer"

" an answer...?"

"yeah tell me for what did the first Nijito fight for?"

"..He...I...Fought for approval"

"very well you start to speak my language, now... tell me why"

"Because approval was the only thing he ever sought, he wanted to be accepted from his family... by anyone else"

"and that's what created you...after all you were like me: a delusion"

"...Like you?"

"That's right Nijito, you were and I'm a delusion, a persona born from this desert that is our mind shaped just to accomplish a desire, "

"...a desire?"

"desire, wish, dream call it like you want, it doesn't change anything"

"...just who am I? who are you?"

"You are Nijito, the second Nijito born to achieve the approval wished by the first one. Think about all the masks you crafted, they were never created out of need... you made them to be accepted from everyone even from yourself.
And I...I'm Nijito...the version of you that can achieve what you desire"

"you are Truth"
"I am Truth"

"You know what's the price for my strenght...are you ready to pay it"
He (I) said after I didn't dare to speak anymore

"Yes, I'm ready"
I responded at last with a calm I mustered only the night I was born

"very well...now sleep"
He (I) said starting to choke me, in the same way I did last time.

quickly my eyes became difficult to keep open

The last thoughts went to all the people I had always approached under a mask...I was kind of sorry to have never showed them my true self, but I guessed it was too late for regrets so I just let myself die in that desert corner of my mind, while someone stronger than me took my place.

Good Night

---

From a hot desert with the sun at its zenith to a chilly park with the moon peaking from the horizon. That was the first thing I noticed after returning from my mind

"Nijito...N-I-J-I-T-O, that's my name, but I'm more San(3)-jito at this point uh?"
I muttered while I regained awareness of my surrounding

At the moment I was on the ground, a knife was stuck in my right hand...and

"Have you had enough Bitch or you want some more"

an enraged teenager was a few steps away from me

"Right still in a middle of a fight... Geez what a shitty situation"
I whispered standing up from the ground

I thought that I would have struggled a lot to do it after all I had taken quite a few blows from my opponent, Bakkin.
Yet oddly enough I managed to with ease, I didn't seem I had been beaten into a pulp until a minute ago.
My ribs didn't hurt anymore, my cheeks werent pulsing; I was completely free from any injuries except for the knife still inside my palm

"well I can remove this problem quickly"
I thought staring at my hand and then extracting the blade

"What the Fuck "
Muttered the teenager astonished

"uh that's new...but I guess I have other things to do now"
I watched my hand's wound heal on its own and then turned towards Bakkin

On his face there was quite the expression; mixture of fear, disbelief and rage"

" Just What the fuck are you?"
he pointed his hand at me

"I have no Idea Bakkin, but I have an idea about what to do with your knife"

---

And now the Local news

Yesterday Aikasa Baki a young drug dealer 17 years old was found unconscious in the residential area of the city, apparently he had been stabbed in his leg with a small knife and then choked, probably a fight between small criminals. He is currently being hold by local police for illegal possession of cannabis.

Another scandal widespread on the web and scandalistic newspaper this morning, the Paparazzo Two strike once more this time to damage eight voice actress of age between 18 and 21."

---

Fighting
everyone fight for something, in my case it's the Truth.
everything else doesn't matter to me anymore, I will whatever it takes
lying, betraying, hurting, hunting
I won't stop until I will have discovered all the secrets in this orange letter...
one time I asked myself if I was a bad person, the answer
Yes
I live thanks to people secrets, mistakes and naivety
I'm a parasite
but the Truth

is that I'm fine with it

---

FINALLY THIS NIGHTMARE IS OVER (PUN) AND I CAN FOCUS ON HACHIMAN'S POINT OF VIEW
I HOPE NIJITO'S SIDE QUEST DIDN'T BORE YOU...
I'M TRYING TO CONVEY A DIFFERENT A BIT DIFFERENT FROM THE BATTLE/SHOUNEN OF THE 3 PROTAGONISTS

LET ME KNOW YOUR OPINIONS OR DOUBTS IN REVIEWS OR PMs

As always thanks to everybody who follow this story my beta reader devilnightking100 and sorry for the click bait of ch2

---

NEXT WEEK "THE LONER" WHERE THE SHIT GETS REAL