I do not own, nor will I ever own, the Teen Titans. Although I do own a few of their comic books. OK, I own a lot of their comic books, satisfied. Oh, I also own dvds of all five seasons. And am extremely annoyed at a lack of a sixth season.
Hidden Talents - Part 2
"The Alarm!" yelled Robin.
"Robin, that's the doorbell." Interjected Raven, before Robin could get all worked up. He had a tendency to assume any loud buzzing, ringing or bonging was the alarm. Understandable in this case as the doorbell ringing was a very rare occurrence.
"Doorbell? Who'd ring our doorbell? Come to think of it, who ever comes here without it being a villain or another Titan?" mused Cyborg. "We didn't order pizza this early in the day….BEAST BOY!!!"
"Dude, I swear it wasn't me. There's still more in the fridge and I'd finish it off before ordering more. Hey, maybe it's girl scouts. They were here a few months ago. That means…"
"COOKIES" yelled Beast Boy and Cyborg together.
"Wonderful!" exclaimed Starfire, "The cookies of scouts of girls are marvelous delicacies. The mints are especially tasty after being dunked in Worstershire sauce." That stopped everyone in their tracks.
"Worstershire sauce?" said Robin. He looked a little pale at the thought. "Most humans dunk cookies in milk."
"Then what is the purpose of Worstershire sauce?" asked Starfire, confused.
"I've been trying to figure that one out myself for a while now." Said Raven. "Why do we even have it in the tower anyway?"
"I just assumed it came with the tower, sort of like the air conditioner." Ventured Beast Boy. " Come on, that girl scout is getting away!" Beast Boy, Cyborg and Starfire all rushed for the door. Both Raven and Robin looked at each other with long-suffering expressions.
"Guys! No one said it was a girl scout!" shouted Robin. "They never listen. Just once, for a change of pace, it would be nice if they listened. Why can't they check the monitor? It could be Control Freak or Dr. Light or…."
"Robin, get a grip. Do you REALLY think any of them would ring the doorbell before attacking us?"
Robin looked at Raven for a moment, then said under his breath, "Well, it could happen."
"Maybe I should start throwing you against the wall instead of Beast Boy." Muttered Raven.
Meanwhile, the other three Titans were making their way to the front door. This was a little difficult as the front door was seldom used. Most of the time, the Titans left either through the window (usually Beast Boy, unintentionally, assisted by Raven), through the garage using the T-car or through the roof. In fact, sometimes they had difficulty remembering where the front door actually was.
In any case, the three finally made their way to the door. This time it really was fortunate that Beast Boy reached it first as he just opened it (Cyborg would have torn it off its hinges and Starfire would have blasted it.).
"Yo, we'll take 20, no, 40 boxes of……" Beast Boy's voice slowly stopped. "Hey! You're not a girl scout! You're some old dude!" Cyborg promptly wacked him along side of his head.
"Bro, just once can't you be polite. Good morning sir, is there something we can help you with?"
Rather than an 11 year old girl with boxes of cookies, at the door stood an elderly gentleman. He was well dressed in a tweed coat. He looked to be about 55 years old, graying but with some black hair remaining, a small neatly trimmed beard and mustache. He actually looked like your stereotypical college professor.
"Ah, good morning? Were you expecting someone else? I can come back later today."
"No my friend whose name I do not know. I am sorry about Beast Boy, he was hoping for some cookies of girl scouts and thought you were selling them." Starfire replied.
" Oh. Well, ah, in that case, ah, this is the Teen Titans Tower, is it not?"
"DUDE, who else would be dumb enough to live in a giant T on an island where anyone can find them?" shouted Beast Boy, who was still upset that there wasn't a girl scout selling cookies at the door.
"Humpf. Well, I suppose. Is Robin at home and might I be able to speak with him?"
"Certainly." Replied Cyborg. "I'm sure Robin would be happy to speak with you. Who are you?"
"I am Dr. Jacob McElroy, Professor of Biology at Jump City University." (Hey, he really is a stereotypical college professor.) "I am here on a matter of some urgency and need to speak with Robin as soon as possible."
"Friend Doctor, I would be most happy to bring you to see Robin. Would you please step inside?" Despite her mangled syntax, Starfire was always unfailingly polite. Sometimes this became a problem in battles as she would sometimes forget the situation and ask the villain if she could hit him. Once, a bank robber said no and she sat over in the corner of the bank to wait for the fight to be over before rejoining her teammates. It took a while for Robin to convince her that it wasn't really rude to hit someone committing a crime, but occasionally she backslid and forgot.
The four made their way to the common room.
"Bad news Robin, no girl scout cookies." Beast Boy shouted out. "Just this doctor dude who isn't even selling cookies. Hey! Are you selling cookies, I forgot to ask."
"Ah, no son, I'm sorry, but I'm not selling any cookies."
"Bummer." Beast Boy went over to the sofa and sulked. Raven gave his a look of disgust. Couldn't he act his age occasionally? What 15 year old was constantly and unfailingly clueless?
"Robin," said Cyborg. "This is Dr. McElroy from Jump City U. Apparently, he has a problem that he needs to discuss with you."
"Well Dr. McElroy, anything the Titans can do to assist you we'd be glad to do. Are you being threatened or has someone close to you been kidnapped?" Robin said.
"No. No, nothing along those lines. The problem, as Cyborg mentioned, is more of a professional nature. Actually, it's more of a missing person situation."
"Missing person?" asked Starfire. "Are you attempting to correct your aim? We can certainly assist you in attempting to hit someone, we are very good at that." Dr. McElroy looked confused. Almost as confused as Starfire. It took Robin a moment or so to decipher what Starfire meant.
"Umm, Starfire, when someone on earth refers to a missing person, they mean that the person has gone missing and needs to be found. Not that they keep missing the person. Doctor, who is missing?"
"Well, that's part of the problem, we don't know. Perhaps I should begin at the beginning."
"What a novel approach." Muttered Raven sarcastically.
"You are, of course, familiar with Albert Einstein."
"Dude, even I know Einstein is dead. If you're looking for him, we can't help you." Interrupted Beast Boy.
"No, that's not what I mean. If I could be allowed to speak without interruption, please."
"BEAST BOY, SHUT UP!" shouted Raven, Robin and Cyborg. Beast Boy sunk back into the couch, sulking and muttering.
"Humpf. Well, to continue. Perhaps you are aware of Einstein's work in 1905?"
All of the Titans looked confused, other than Robin. What did this have to do with a missing person?
"1905 was Einstein's miracle year. He published four papers that revolutionized physics and science." Robin answered smugly.
"Quite correct my boy." Said Dr. McElroy. ("Show off" muttered Cyborg) "The reason why I bring this up is that a similar situation is occurring now in the field of biology and physiology. Two papers have recently been published that are revolutionary is scope and are years beyond anything currently being worked on."
All of the Titans looked suitably impressed, even Beast Boy's ears twitched and eyebrows were raised.
"That's tremendous news" said Raven. "Anything that advances learning and science is a benefit. How come his work has not been publicized more widely."
"Well, actually, in scientific circles it has been widely publicized. However, generally before the community makes these things widely known to the public, we like to evaluate the data behind the work and examine it for errors. We certainly don't need quacks and fakes taking up our time."
"Wait a minute" said Cybory. "I thought you said this was revolutionary stuff. Now you're saying it could be a quack or a fake?"
"Oh, we don't really believe that. The work is too elegant, too detailed. No, this is more along the lines of crossing t's and dotting I's. We really need to see HOW he did it so that we can proceed."
"Well doctor, why do you not ask him?" said Starfire.
"We don't know who he is or where he lives."
"Hence, the missing person." Stated Robin. "I presume you want us to find him. Do you know anything about him at all? Is it even a him? Where did the papers come from?"