Note: Sorry for the ridiculous delay with this chapter. Life, as usual, got in the way. I am also working on the next chapter of Hold on Hope and a one-shot which is almost complete. Hope this is okay for now : (
Among The Wreckage Chapter 2
"Please sit down boss, you're making my head spin" Steve glanced at Kono as she leaned her head back against the wall and closed her eyes. He hadn't been able to sit still since Danny had been carted off to surgery several hours ago. Watching the remainder of his team he could tell that he was not the only one this night had been taking it's toll on. The stewing guilt kicked up notch and made his stomach turn.
"Sorry Kono" Steve whispered, rubbing a hand down his face.
"Don't be sorry, just sit down"
Just as he was about to concede to Kono's demand, a deep voice called his name.
"Commander McGarrett?
Kono and Chin jumped to their feet as Steve spun around to come face to face with Danny's surgeon. Steve swallowed the growing lump in his throat but couldn't find his voice.
"Why don't we sit down?" The doctor motioned to the chairs. Steve shook his head as the churning bile in his stomach increased, he couldn't bring himself to move.
"Just...just please, is he alright? Is Danny okay?" He stumbled over his words, not liking the look on the surgeons face. He watched as the young doctor glanced at Kono and Chin before settling sorrowful eyes back on Steve.
"I'm sorry Commander, there were complications. We did everything we could..."
Steve could hear nothing beyond the intense ringing in his ears. He involuntarily drew a breath when his body reminded him to breathe. Danny was dead, gone. This had to be a mistake or some sort of cruel practical joke. There was no way Danny could really be dead, no fucking way. The ringing in his ears was replaced by the incessant pounding of his own heart. How unfair that his heart still be beating when Danny's wasn't. No, it was a lie. For whatever reason this doctor had to be lying. He could feel the bile rising to his throat, he swallowed hard, willing it to recede.
"Steve" Chin's normally even toned voice sounded raw and pain filled. Steve was frozen, suspended in the moment. His brain worked hard to process this crazy notion that Danny had succumbed to his injuries, the idea that Steve would never have the chance to tell Danny how fucking sorry he was for the things he had said.
"Steve" This time Kono tried, her broken voice barely registering in Steve's head.
Grace. He was going to have to tell Grace that she would never see her Danno again. The devastated face of Danny's precious little girl flashed before his eyes and it stole the breath right from his lungs, making him dizzy. He barely felt himself stumble before two sets of firm hands guided him to a chair.
"Steve" He closed his eyes, welcoming the tightness in his chest, hoping it would save him from this horrific nightmare.
"Steve"
"Commander"
"STEVE!"
Steve's eyes flew open, he looked frantically from Kono to Chin and back again. Eyes were watching him with concern but they didn't carry the despair and pain they had a few minutes ago.
"Damn boss, you sure do sleep hard. You okay brah?" Kono's voice light and somewhat teasing now, no longer broken. And he no longer felt like there was an elephant sitting on his chest. Steve ran a hand over his face, stopping to rub at his eyes.
"Yeah, yeah I'm good...sorry" Holy fuck it had been a nightmare. The relief flowed through his veins but only until he heard Chin's voice.
"Steve, Danny's surgeon is here to talk to you" Steve's head snapped up and found a concerned doctor standing to his left. He jumped to his feet, panic set in when his nightmare from only moments ago flashed through his mind.
"Doc?" One word was all Steve could manage but it held the weight of a thousand questions and the doctor knew it.
"Commander I'm happy to tell you that Danny has come through surgery, quite well actually given the circumstances"
Although Steve knew for sure there was going to be a 'but' coming, he released the breath he had been holding. Danny was alive.
"Now, that's not to say we didn't have a difficult time in there. Danny suffered a laundry list of injuries, I'm sure they will all sound severe but I assure you Danny is already on the road to recovery. He had some internal bleeding caused by a ruptured spleen. We were hoping to not have to remove it, however the damage was significant and we couldn't count on his body healing the spleen itself, not with his body sustaining such trauma."
Steve nodded in understanding.
"His lung was punctured by a broken rib. We inserted a chest tube which serves to allow air to escape the lung but not reenter it. The tube will be left in place until no air is seen to escape from it for a period of time, and X-rays confirm re-expansion of the lung."
The doctor stopped to look at the three officers, waiting for their nod of understanding and for him to continue.
"Bear in mind your friend was in a compact car that flipped several times so his body is pretty banged up, bruising and such. Miraculously though his rib was the only thing broken, however, he does have a hip fracture which we were unable to repair at this time. The surgery is a major stress on the patient and we couldn't risk it with his blood pressure already being dangerously low throughout surgery. As his condition improves over the next couple of days we'll make plans to operate."
The doctor took a deep breath and continued.
"Our biggest concern is his head injury. Danny suffered a cerebral contusion, causing swelling and pressure on the brain. As of right now he doesn't require surgical intervention but we will be monitoring him very closely to ensure the swelling goes down. In the meantime he will be heavily sedated, a medical induced coma if you will, to allow his body to do it's job and begin healing."
The doctor could see the fear and shock when they heard the word 'coma', he rushed to reassure them.
"Rest assured, this is standard procedure for this type of swelling on the brain." The doctor took a deep breath, Danny's friends didn't seem convinced.
"Look, your friend has a long road ahead of him. However, barring any further complications he could potentially make a full recovery."
Steve's eyes snapped to the poor doctor, piercing a hole through him with his glare.
"Potentially?"
"Yes, potentially. Danny's heart stopped twice before he even arrived in the ER, then again in surgery and while tests show his heart is as strong as ever, each time his heart stopped it prevented the flow of oxygen to the brain. I'm sure I don't need to tell you that whenever that happens, especially for an extended amount of time, there is the possibility for brain damage."
"But you don't know that for sure" Steve argued, refusing to believe what he was being told.
"No, unfortunately that is not something we can determine until he regains consciousness. Commander McGarrett, I'm simply trying to prepare you for any possibility. It's a bridge we'll have to cross when we get to it. Right now I am very optimistic and am going to focus on his physical recovery." The doctor ended his speech with a gentle reassuring smile, genuine enough to convince Steve that the prognosis was good.
"Can we see him?" Kono asked with hopeful eyes.
"He'll be in recovery for another hour, once he's transferred to ICU you'll be able to sit with him. Just remember, Danny is under heavy sedation and won't be responsive until we want him to be. I'll have the nurse come and get you when he can have visitors"
Once the doctor had retreated Steve went into command mode.
"Chin, I want a full report on the Camaro. I want to know if it was tampered with"
"Wait, you think this wasn't an accident?" The notion hadn't even occurred to Kono.
"What I know is that Danny is an extremely cautious driver and I don't want to waste any time not exploring the possibility that someone could have deliberately done this"
He knew it was a far stretch but is was better than the thought that their argument had shaken Danny so much that he was distracted and upset while driving in a torrential downpour. It's too much so he pushes it out of his mind for the moment and redirects his thoughts.
"I'm on it, call me if anything changes"
"I'll go with Chin. Boss, you gonna be okay?" Steve hated the look of sympathy in her eyes, if she only knew how bad it had gotten between him and Danny earlier she would probably hate him.
"I'll be fine Kono, just let me know as soon as you have the report"
As Kono and Chin disappeared around the corner, Steve sunk into the chair beside him and waited.
/
Precisely an hour later Steve was being led through a series of rooms that made up the Intensive Care Unit. Steve kept his head down as he walked, not wanted to intrude on the privacy of the other patients. It was eerily quiet, save for the melodic beeping of various machines as he passed each room. The nurse leading him stopped outside the entrance of one of the larger rooms and Steve raised his head, his heart stopping at the sight before him.
"Commander, you can go in" The nurse had a gentle voice and lay a warm comforting hand on his arm for reassurance.
Steve swallowed hard and moved towards the bed that held his partner. He stopped when his thighs hit the rail, his eyes began to roam Danny's broken form, cataloging every bruise, bandage and wire.
The entirety of Danny's face was covered in small cuts, abrasions and bruises, undoubtedly from small pieces of glass cutting into him. The left side of his face was barely recognizable. A white bandage covered some of the area leading from the temple into his hairline, the area so swollen and bruised around it that Steve had to bite back a cry at the sight of it. A thin tube protruded from his slack mouth, held in place by a small piece of white tape. Steve couldn't help but be transfixed by it. The swoosh of the ventilator pulled him from his daze and his eyes continued their travel. Another thin tube snaked out from the top of the hospital gown which was loose and laying low so that Steve could see it was leading under another white bandage at his chest.
Tears gathered in his eyes as the guilt hit him. All he could think of was that his partner, his friend, was lying in the bed fighting for his life because of him. He knew in his gut that those reports would come back clean. The only thing to cause such a horrific accident were harsh words and an upset driver. How would he ever make up for this?
He reached out a hand towards Danny's arm, noting the myriad of bruising across his arms, but pulled back before he could reach him.
"It's okay, you can touch him" The kind nurse was back and lay her small hand atop Danny's just to show Steve it was okay.
As Steve reached out again, the nurse slowly pulled her hand back. She offered a comforting smile and a small nod when he glanced at her.
Danny's skin was warm to the touch as Steve gently wrapped his hand around Danny's uncommonly still one. The overwhelming sadness and fear that hit him at first contact took his breath away. He had been so afraid that Danny was going to be lost to him forever that to feel him still alive, blood still running through his veins, almost brought him to his knees. Holding himself upright he whispered the words that he would say every single day for the rest of his life if he had to.
"I'm sorry Danny...I'm so damn sorry"