Summary: What if Cato had taken Peeta with him when he fell off the Cornucopia in the first book? What if Katniss had shot them both to put them out of their misery? How would everyone react? Don't worry, she'll still become the Mockingjay and such.
Sorry for the long wait you guys
Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING
I walk out onto the stage and make my way to the throne next to Caesar's chair. The throne is rather ornate. The seat cushion was a velvety purple and the frame was gilded gold. I take Caesar's proffered hand and he waits for me to be seated.
"So Katniss," he starts. His voice is full of sorrow; the audience probably even thinks its real. I'm not quite so fooled though, or maybe I'm just jaded. I didn't trust people much before the Games let alone now. "Katniss, what went through your head when you realized what had happened?"
I stared for a second and looked down. I pretended to wipe a tear away as I sniffed. When I looked up again I saw the audience in tears. I tried not to roll my eyes. These people had no idea what loss was. "What went through my mind?" I asked Caesar quietly. The microphones picked up my voice easily though. "I don't think anything did. For a few seconds I didn't even register what had just happened. Then suddenly I saw Peeta falling and the mutts attacking him and Cato and I knew what I had to do."
"Yes yes. You've always done what needed to be done in the arena haven't you Katniss." He didn't phrase it as a question despite the way he worded the sentence. It was like he was trying to goad me. "Why don't we watch the highlights and then we'll ask some more questions."
As the screen flashes the opening of the Games, I turn to watch like I'm supposed to. Viewing is mandatory throughout the districts. On screen is the first scene when we all rise on our podiums just before the cannon booms. I didn't have much part in the bloodbath so I was curious what all had happened. I noticed that in a small square in the corner is my face now, catching my expressions as I watch. I made a note to appear more distraught when I see Peeta on screen later.
Whoever was in charge of the camera fast forwarded a bit until the next death and then the next. Eventually I came back on screen. It was when I was hiding in the tree from the Career alliance and Peeta. At the time I thought he was hunting me, but he'd been protecting me the whole time. I felt a tear slip down my face but didn't move to wipe it away. The audience sniffled and awed when they saw it leave my eye.
Once I drop the tracker jacker nest on the group below and we watch them slowly die, the camera zooms again to the next few deaths. When it gets to Rue they show how she died, how I shot the kid who killed her, and when I sang. They ignore my flowers and salute to the camera, but I wasn't surprised by that.
I am numb while during the rest of the viewing until it Seneca's announcement. I watch as I scream for Peeta on screen and the audience starts crying again. I make sure to look down and pretend again to wipe away tears. I'm surprised when I do so to find real tears on my face.
We view more shots of death after death until finally we're at the final scene, the cornucopia. I am suddenly unsure if I'll be able to watch, but I can't seem to turn my head away. It's as if I'm stuck in another one of my nightmares as the scene unfolds. I see Peeta tap Cato's hand as a target for me to shoot. I don't know if the audience notices, most people wouldn't. I watch myself shoot Cato in the eye and am surprised to see the lack of emotion on my past self's face. Is this what everyone else sees all of the time when they look at me? Next I see Cato and Peeta fall to the ground and hear their screams as they're eaten alive. Many of the audience members turn away when I shoot them again. They may not understand it, but I'm putting them out of their misery; it was really the only thing that I could do, my last attempt to help.
"Now Katniss, why did you shoot them again? It seems a bit like overkill if you ask me." I worked very hard not to glare.
"I put them out of their misery. I was the kindest thing I could do," especially considering I've never possessed much kindness in the first place. My tone must have struck a chord with him because when he spoke again his voice was cautious.
"Yes. How do you think your district will feel about your victory?" That was the kicker wasn't it? They never expected one of us to win, but Peeta's father had said it himself, if one of us was going to win, we all knew it would be me.
"Well Caesar, I think that they'll be heartbroken about losing Peeta. He was well loved back home. He was good and kind. He represented the best in us." I didn't know where that response came from, it just came out. Apparently it was the right thing to say. I could see Haymitch smile at me from the wings and the crowd awed again.
Caesar decided to end the interview after one more question. "Katniss, that promise you made to your sister about winning the Games for her, are you excited to go home and see your family?" Was I? I wasn't the same person I was before the Reaping. I looked the same, but I wasn't that girl anymore. Now I was a victor. I thought about what Peeta had said the night before the Games began, how he wouldn't let them change him. I think he won. He died as Peeta and not a Capitol puppet. Me on the other hand, I wasn't myself. I didn't know who I was anymore. Scratch that, I knew exactly who I was. My name is Katniss Everdeen and I am from District 12. I am a Victor. I am a Murderer. I am Lost.
Someone backstage must have noticed that I had blanked out because the Capitol theme started to play. Caesar made a few more frivolous remarks and then I was being ushered backstage.
"You did good Sweetheart" Haymitch whispered to me as Effie led us back to our apartment. Tomorrow we would be leaving the Capitol to go back home. I wasn't sure how I felt about that, but anything was better than being here.
Before we all went to bed Effie gave me a hug and said how she'd miss me and that she was sorry about Peeta, how he'd always been so kind and how much the Capitol citizens had loved him. I just nodded along. By the next Games none of them would remember Peeta, let alone how much they'd "loved" him.