CHAPTER 2

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor did I create, any of the A-team characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Stephen J. Cannell and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Cannell team.

Likewise, I do not own, nor did I create, any of the Dukes of Hazzard characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Gy Waldron and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Waldron and team

Author's Notes: I came across a picture of a replica A-team van towing a replica General Lee and that started my brain thinking. What would happen if the A-team joined forces with the Duke Family to bring some justice onto a group of lowlife thugs?

Chapter Summary: The A-team and the Dukes get to know each other better.

Hijinks in Hazzard: by LAGC

Chapter 2: Down on the Farm

Hannibal looked guardedly at Uncle Jesse, assessing his options. Jesse casually leaned against his chair back, waiting on his guest's response. After a lifetime spent dependent upon his abilities to instantly read a person and situation, Hannibal followed his instincts and opted to trust Mr. Duke.

"Well the Law isn't always our companion, Jesse. They have a misinformed opinion of my Team which stems from a mistake made by a military court back in 1972. My men and I have spent the last decade trying to find a way to rectify that problem."

Jesse Duke, also a man of keen instincts, sized up Hannibal and replied, "That's not a problem, we Dukes have been having trouble with the law since the days we were born. We just keep doing what's right and what needs to get done."

"That's pretty much what my Team and I do."

Hannibal went on to explain that they hire themselves out to people who have problems that they can't handle or deal with in the standard ways. They were on their way back to the west coast from their last job outside Atlanta, but thanks to Murdock's creative map reading they had wound up in a ditch in Hazzard County. Jesse assured Hannibal that Cooter would have their parts in no time and that between BA, Bo, and Luke they'd have the van fixed in even less time. Jesse also insisted that housing them at the farm was no imposition at all.

"If it gets too crowded in the house Bo and Luke can just sleep out in the barn since it was their bullheadedness that caused the van damage in the first place." Jesse concluded.

The next morning Hannibal awoke to the scent of bacon sizzling on the stove top. Face and BA roused a minute later. They entered the kitchen just as Bo and Luke tumbled back inside with fresh eggs from the coop and apples from the fruit cellar. Hannibal looked around for Murdock.

"HM is out in the barn milking the cow." Jesse explained.

"What's that Fool know about milking cows?" BA mumbled to Hannibal.

"Ah we should all know by now not to underestimate Murdock's repertoire of skills." Hannibal consoled.

The Team quickly gathered themselves up. Face called dibs on the bathroom and set off to get ready for the day. Jesse put Hannibal and BA to work peeling the apples so he could fry them up. Murdock and Daisy strolled in with a full pail of milk.

"Uncle Jesse look at all the milk that ole cow gave us. Murdock must have magic hands or he just sweet talked that cow into being extra generous today. I'm going to set it over here so that it can separate. I want to make chocolate cream pie for tonight's dessert."

After their fortifying meal, Luke drove BA to Cooters garage to acquire the parts they'd need to fix the van. They left in Jesse's truck since BA flat out refused to climb into the General Lee like "some slippery eel." Murdock had no such reservations about the General so he and Bo set off for the crash site. During the night a very unhappy Big Guy had realized that they left his tool box behind.

Hannibal and Face went to the barn to straighten up the interior of the tossed around van. They also wanted to assess if there had been any damage done to their arsenal. They hoped to do this in private, but had no such luck. As Face was inspecting the last rifle Jesse appeared.

"Seems to me that you need to tell me the rest of your story, Hannibal. My boys are on probation and a big clause of that probation is no guns other than my hunting rifle."

They were caught dead to rights. Face and Hannibal looked at each other, Face gave a shrug that meant "Go ahead, Colonel."

"All right, Jesse, you deserve the whole story. What I told you yesterday was all true but a bit watered down. In '72 we were wrongly convicted of robbing the Bank of Hanoi. We were operating under direct orders but our commanding officer was killed during a strike on our base and couldn't corroborate our story. We escaped from Bragg and have been on the run since. To pay the bills, and pass the time, like I said yesterday, we hire ourselves out to help innocent people solve problems. Some of these missions require that we defend ourselves and our clients. We are called the A-team."

"The A-team? What brings you to Hazzard County?"

"We just helped a reverend in Arcadia stop a thug from poisoning his parishioners with illegal and unscrupulously made corn whiskey. We were headed back Calufornia but then Murdock:s creative map reading put us in the path of Bo and Luke." replied Hannibal.

"Poisonous 'shine eh? A still made out of oil barrels?" asked Jesse

"Pretty much." answered Face.

"People have no morals now. Making 'shine used to be a time honored family tradition. Now its becoming ...well I don't even have words for it." spat Jesse. "Make sure those guns stay out of sight and locked tight. All we need is Roscoe seeing them and he and Boss Hogg will toss Bo and Luke into such a deep cell we wont be able to find them."

"We certainly will." assured Hannibal.

"Who are Roscoe and Boss Hogg?" asked Faceman.

"Roscoe is our bumbling sheriff and Boss is the guy who runs the county, and especially Roscoe."

Face and Hannibal nodded understandingly.

Just then Daisy called out from the porch, "Uncle Jesse! Uncle Jesse! We've got a problem!"

The three men hurried up to the house. Daisy met them in the driveway.

"Bo and Murdock got arrested by Roscoe. I just heard it over the CB radio."

"Oh dagnabbit why on Earth did Roscoe do that? Well go get the egg money. Sounds like we have to go make bail again." grumbled Jesse

"Already did." said Daisy as she glided behind the wheel of her jeep. Jesse joined her. Face and Hannibal followed suit.

Copyright disclosure:

"Jesse Duke, ... , " That's not a problem, we Dukes have been having trouble with the law since the days we were born. ...".

This phrase is clearly recognizable as part of the theme song to The Dukes of Hazzard. The theme was written and performed by Waylon Jennings. Publisher: Warner/Chappell Music, Inc