AN: Not mine.

This latest episode killed me.

It can't be, she died, Alex killed her—

The shadows are deep and dark, but I can see perfectly, and what I see sends me to my knees. Aunt Astra is standing in front of me, alive and whole, sorrow shining in her eyes. "Oh, my precious Kara," she says softly, crossing the distance between us and kneeling to pull me into her arms. I cling to her, utterly bewildered, but questions will have to wait. Right now, all I can do is cry, hugging her with all my strength. I haven't been able to use my strength without worry since I got to Earth, and it feels so, so good just to hold on as tightly as I can. Aunt Astra rocks me like I'm a child again, cradling the back of my head like she used to whenever I was afraid or upset. "I know, little one, I know. Alexandra told me what happened. But it wasn't your fault." She pulls back, cradling my face in her hands as her thumbs smooth over my cheeks and her eyes find mine. "Do you hear me, Kara?"

"I hurt her—I hurt everyone I care about! The kryptonite, it—it made me the worst version of myself, but I was still me! I did all of that, it wasn't anyone's fault but mine! Every horrible thing I've ever thought….it just came out." I'm sobbing so hard I can barely speak. "And now I can't f-f-fix it….J'onn blew his cover and it's all my fault…"

"Kara, listen to me." Aunt Astra gently tilts my chin up. "I know what it is to regret your past decisions, to wish to change them so badly it aches." The pain in her eyes mirrors, magnifies my own. "But such things will never come to pass. All you can do is move on and try to atone. It won't be easy, but you must try."

"How are you here? I saw you die—Alex told me the truth, that she—" My voice breaks. Aunt Astra gently wipes away my tears, her eyes falling from mine.

"I decided…I could no longer devote myself to my cause. Non accused me of losing heart when I discovered you were still alive, and he was right. Once I found you…" She looks up at me, offering me a tremulous smile. "Nothing else mattered anymore. I still want to save this planet, but I believe diplomacy would be the best way, not violence. But the army is hungry for blood; they will not listen to my plan. I was in danger of losing command, of being usurped. In my desperation, I reached out to Alexandra, although I had no idea she was your sister until later. We hatched a plan…she gave me the idea to line my suit with lead, which soaked up most of the kryptonite radiation, but enough of it stayed that I was severely weakened." Regret crosses her face. "That's why I couldn't stop you from rampaging; I haven't healed fully and I dared not risk revealing myself too soon."

"But the funeral—"

"I fell into a deep sleep as my body tried to heal itself. Once I was sent off in the pod, Alexandra intercepted me and brought me back here. We were going to tell you when the time was right, but I saw you come in and put the letter on the table, and…." She trails off, searching my eyes. "You weren't planning on coming back."

I drop my gaze, shaking my head. "It's better for everyone. I'm too dangerous, Aunt Astra. I let them down, I hurt so many…."

"You listen to me, Kara Zor-El." Aunt Astra's voice is low and fierce. "I know that you are the bravest, most noble woman I have ever met, and that nobody could love this planet or this city more than you. I also know that you aren't a coward who runs and hides when the tide of battle turns against her. This city needs you to protect it from my husband and his army, and your family needs you to keep them safe." She cups my cheek, forcing me to look into her eyes, and with a pang, I see that hers are wet. "I need you, Kara. When I presented myself before Alexandra, I did so with—with the hope of redeeming myself in your eyes. I wish to make things right with you, and…I only pray it is not too late." She takes in a shaky breath. "I know I have no right to say this after everything I've done, but…stay with me. Please, little one."

I'm reeling. After everything that's happened today, this is almost too much to bear. On the other hand, I'm not sure anything or anyone else could have saved me. I guess I should be mad that she's cheating and using the whole "family" thing, but I'm just so happy she's alive that I don't even care. "I can't lose Alex," I whisper, swiping at the fresh tears that are falling. "I don't know how to fix what I've broken. Cat…she says I can get the city to trust me again, but…" I shake my head.

"We will find a way. Together. You are all I have left, and I swear I won't ever leave your side again. I couldn't save Krypton, and it's only by the blessing of Rao that you survived." Aunt Astra's thumb tenderly strokes my cheek. "Let me help you as I could not then. Let me be here for you the way I should have been. I love you so much, little one…"

"I love you too," I whimper as I launch myself into her arms again. She catches me and holds me close, and I bury my face in her shoulder, pretending for just a moment that I'm a little girl again and that nothing can hurt me in the shelter of her arms. I wish it were really true. "Aunt Astra, I'm so scared. What if it happens again? What if I go rogue—what if next time, I do something I can't fix? That I—?" Just the thought of taking someone else's life makes my stomach turn. "I came so close to killing Alex…"

"I cannot guarantee what will happen, Kara, but I have faith in you. I know we have a massive advantage against humans, but they're not so defenseless as I once believed." Her lips press tenderly against my hair. "And now that I have you back, nothing, in this world or any other, could make me let you go again."

"I don't want me and Alex to be like you and Mom. I don't want to lose her."

"She loves you. More than I think you know. The wounds you have caused will not heal easily, but they will heal. I promise." Aunt Astra pulls back to look me in the eye. "Of course, that depends on if you are around to speak with her."

"I didn't tell her what I was planning in the letter," I mumble. It's suddenly occurring to me just how drained I am after the last couple of days, and my eyelids feel heavier than any steel beam I've ever lifted. "Jus' that I love her…"

"You're staying with me tonight." I'm in no position to argue, but I don't really think she was asking anyways. Aunt Astra scoops me up, and I curl against her, letting her warmth comfort me. All of this will still be there in the morning, but just knowing that I'm not alone anymore makes it seem not quite so bad. Sleep lays its soothing fingers on me, and the last thing I hear before slipping beneath the surface is my aunt's voice:

"Good night, my precious little one. I will be here when you wake."

I almost smile.