Chapter 2: The Fire Makers
Jett stood outside the wardrobe room looking disgruntled as the Doctor continued to search for something within the room's depths.
"Are you sure you have the coordinates right this time Doctor?" Jett asked annoyed. During their last trip they had planned to visit the Castrovani system to view all of the latest 51st century starships, instead they had found themselves on a deserted desert planet, with absolutely no civilization to be found what so ever.
"Oh come now, you love the fact that you are one of only two people who have ever seen the fire rains of Belayne,"
"There's probably a good reason for that, given that the whole surface of the planet melted into glass,"
"Well yeah but once you saw the sunlight reflecting off the glass, you could see into whole knew colour spectrum..."
"Oh sure that was great, until it nearly blinded me,"
"Well it was only nearly-"
"And then the second round of fire rains came and we ran out of breathable air,"
"Yeah...that was a bit unexpected...but one might say that the spectacle was literally breath taking," the Doctor grinned at Jett as he poked his head out from behind one of the racks of clothes. Jett gave an unamused snort as he crossed his arms over his chest frowning.
"So where are we supposed to be going this time?" Jett asked almost afraid to hear the answer.
"Oh come on Mr. Grumpy-face, cheer up. We're not going too terribly far this time. I'm actually quite good at these short hops you know." the Doctor flung a large woolly hat over his shoulder, catching Jett almost square in the face. He grunted and put the hat away waiting. He had been traveling with the Doctor for some time now, while most trips had been quite fun and exciting, others had been dangerous and fairly terrifying, but it never quite seemed to effect the Doctor, he took the danger in stride and like a cat he always managed to somehow land on his feet. "To answer your question, we are going to the Paris–Rouen, Le Petit Journal Competition for Horseless Carriages in 1894. It's actually quite an exciting event you know? It's one of the first times that humans use motor cars in a competition or race of any kind. Mind you the speeds weren't much to write home about, at least by your modern standards, but at the time it was the thrill of a life time. Barreling down the open road at a whole 20 miles per hour...you know many people at the time thought that going that fast had ill health effects...which I suppose would be correct if you take into account the crashes, roll overs, and what have you..." Jett rolled his eyes as the Doctor trailed off.
"Again I have to ask Doctor, did you get the coordinates right this time? I don't want to step out the doors and find myself floating in space, or sinking in an ocean or something equally unpleasant,"
"Oh ye of little faith," the Doctor said emerging from the mass of clothes, looking for all the world like some old World War I pilot, a long brown double breasted leather trench coat, knee high riding style boots, a long white silk scarf wrapped around his neck, a tweed flat cap worn backwards on his head, and a pair of ridiculously large goggles perched at the top of his forehead.
"Please don't tell me that's what you'll be wearing," Jett said with a critical eye.
"Of course I am. It's always best to blend in as best you can, you know that," the Doctor answered airily as he stuck a pair of thick leather gauntleted gloves in the belted wait of his coat.
"Oh you'll blend right in with that outfit, you don't look like some kind of alien trying to blend in at all," the sarcasm coming fast and thick, and the Doctor was completely oblivious.
"I am the master of disguise and blending in, although there was that one time in the Amazon when a tribe there seemed to think I was their god the Mighty ZiDoktora,"
"How very Wizard of Oz," Jett commented smirking a little.
"Where do you think L. Frank Baum got the idea? Although the whole needing a brain, heart and courage bit was taken out of context. I told them that I was extremely brilliant, and that if they listened to me, they would be saved from the upcoming flood…I think something got lost in the translation, and they thought that I told them to get my courage, all they had to do was cut out my heart and bash in my brains. An honest mistake, it could have happened to anyone…" the Doctor strode down the ever changing corridor with Jett in tow. "Right, are we ready for our next adventure?" he asked once they reached the control room.
"Only if you managed to get the coordinates right this time. I really don't fancy another life or death struggle as soon as we walk out the doors. You were trained to fly this thing? Right?" Jett asked a little petulantly.
"Of course I was trained. I have been flying this TARDIS throughout the known universe, all of time and then some. You know traveling through time and space isn't as simple as you humans seem to think. It's not like you get in a rail car visiting various points in history, although I did that once, the motion sickness was dreadful,"
"Doctor," the Doctor kept walking and talking as he threw the door control switch.
"Time is more like a big ball of interconnecting roots, except they keep expanding and contracting, as an infinite number of possible time lines are created and destroyed at any possible moment."
"Doctor," Jett growled
"And then you throw in the spatial element into it as well, it's like trying to bull's eye a microscopic dart board from miles away while traveling in a balloon in a hurricane, that is to say it isn't impossible, just exceedingly difficult,"
"Doctor!" Jett grabbed his arm stopping the other boy as he looked purposefully at the ring of savage looking people around them.
"Ah," the Doctor said noting their flint pointed spears and ragged furs. "So not Paris 1894...must have been a misplaced decimal point somewhere..."
"Doctor you did it again," Jett said utterly exasperated.
"I did no such thing!" The Doctor barked indignantly. "It's you lot-" one of the men grunted and gestured a spear at them. "Not now! My friend and I are having a very serious discussion here. You will just have to wait,"
"Doctor? You speak caveman?" Jett asked quirking an eyebrow.
"Of course I speak caveman. I also speak baby, High Ganymedeian, Flymeailian sign language, which isn't easy with only two hands and ten fingers I'll tell you; Terseran, please do not ask me to demonstrate that one, it can get rather messy especially if someone happens to light a match...what else? Oh yes I also speak horse. I once knew a horse named Susan, a splendid chap if I ever saw one. I also knew a horse named Arthur, although he turned out to by a Zygon. You know those big red rubbery things with lots of suckers, venom sacks in their mouths...surprisingly good kissers..." the Doctor looked off into space for a moment as though lost in thought, turning abruptly on Jett. "But that's beside the point! The point is you lot have so many different calendars, for one little world in all of the cosmos. There's a lunar calendar, a solar calendar, a Julian calendar...all because two men decided they were important enough to have their own months, then came the Gregorian calendar, not to mention the whole BC, AD, CE, BCE and all of that codswollop. Seriously, how do you expect a time traveler to know where he is when you don't even know where you are?! Sometimes I don't know why I even bother with your lot..."
"Doctor! As fascinating as that all must be, I'm sure. We have bigger problems right now. You know the 30 or so heavily armed cavemen, all looking rather dangerous and threatening..." Jett hissed trying to keep his temper. As much as he loved traveling and being with the Doctor, there were times when the boy's intelligence, and bloody ego were extremely trying.
"Yes I know that!" the Doctor said testily. "Right. So which one of you lot is in charge here? Take me to your leader," the Doctor grinned, stage whispering to Jett, "I've always wanted to say that,"
Jett just rolled his eyes as a bear of a man stepped forward.
"You gods?" he asked. Jett wondered why the TARDIS wasn't translating the language as well as it normally did. Maybe the language was too simple, which made translating the context more difficult than translating the words.
"Why? Are you looking for gods? We could be gods, you never know. Why you should see Jett here in a Speedo, definitely the body of a god that's for certain..." the Doctor rattled off, getting into the big man's face, Jett blushed a deep red. He really did not need the Doctor talking about him like that, especially not while they could be in danger.
"You make fire. Gods make fire. You gods. Fire make chief. You give fire Tal. Fire make Tal chief." the bear of a man, Tal evidently, nodded as though that were the end of the discussion, which was probably the longest one the man had ever spoken.
"Oh? Will we now? Certainly we can make fire, why Jett here," the Doctor secretly pulled out a lighter from his pocket passing it to Jett without the natives noticing. "He can make fire at the snap of his fingers. Show him Jett," the Doctor said while Jett fumbled with the lighter for a moment, then a small blueish flame came to life. Tal and those closest to the Doctor and Jett scrambled back in terror cowering back from the pair.
"Yes, yes, tremble in fear of the bluey blueness of the fire of the gods ooooooo," the Doctor said a bit mockingly taking an unconscious step closer to Jett. "Now, Tal, me old would-be-chief, what makes you so important that you think you should be the leader? Why should we give you fire?" the Doctor asked crossing his arms over his chest.
"Tal strong. Tal father make fire. Tal father leader. Tal be leader,"
"Ohhhhhh I see, you think that just because your father could make fire, that you should automatically be the leader. Tell me can Tal make his own fire? Hmm? Can strong Tal fend off the cold? Hang on...this seems rather familiar..."
"Doctor, is it wise to provoke them? The have spears and knives, and we have a lighter, not to mention the fact that there are a lot more of them than there are of us," Jett asked holding the lighter higher forcing a number of the bolder souls to take a step back.
"It's perfectly alright. They wouldn't dare to hurt us, because if they do, we take the secret of fire making with us, and I'll bet pennies to parsnips that old Tal over there is too smart to risk losing the secrets of fire." the Doctor explained easily as he studied the faces around him.
"You not give Tal fire? Tal take fire!"
"Ahahah, I don't think so. Jett put out the fire," Jett removed his thumb from the lighter's fuel extinguishing the tiny flame, much to the dismay and fury of the cavemen around him.
"You bring back! You give Tal fire! Or you die!" Tal gestured threateningly with his spear, while Jett readied the lighter and the Doctor sighed.
"You see Jett, in a billion years humanity barely changes. Give me what I want or I'll kill you, it's all very Dalek really. But I have put rather a lot of work into your people, there is hope, there is always hope,"
"Yes Doctor, that's all fine and good, but these people don't really seem to care how much work you've put into them..."
"Take him." Tal commanded two burly men, who rushed towards Jett. Jett tried to relight the lighter, but it was knocked of his hand as he tried to avoid the brutes coming after him. The Doctor tried to divert on their attentions, only to be soundly clocked on the side of the head, sending him to the ground in an unceremonious heap.
"Doctor! Get your hands off of me! Doctor!" Jett struggled to get away, but was held fast. A group of strong men picked up the Doctor and tied him to a long pole, carrying him like some kind of fresh kill.
"Not gods. Tal eat not-gods. Tal take fire from not-gods. Tal make fire. Tal leader always," Tal nodded and the group carried the Doctor on his pole, along with prodding, a newly gagged Jett, to get moving. The longer they marched the more frantic Jett got and the more roughly the cavemen shoved or dragged him. Jett was truly beginning to worry about the Doctor, surely the hit hadn't been so hard as to kill him. Even if it had killed him, wouldn't the Doctor just regenerate and change into a new body, not that much cared for that idea, he rather liked the body the Doctor was currently inhabiting, but having the Doctor die...that was just unbearable. Not to mention that fact that Jett weren't killed as well, he'd be stuck millions of years before he was even supposed to be born. Jett pondered that thought for a moment. It was one of the major risks of time travel, but Jett was certain he wouldn't have given up traveling with the Doctor for all the money in the universe.
After much poking and prodding they arrived at their destination, a small cave with a boulder to roll in front of the entrance, and from the look of it, it would take several of these big burly men to move it, not a promising thought. The men carrying the Doctor dumped him inside the cave like a sack of potatoes, then Jett was tossed in on top of him. Moments later there was the sounds of grunting and stone scraping, then the cave was sealed leaving Jett bound and gagged with the Doctor's motionless form beneath him. Unshed tears stung his eyes as panic and despair seeped into Jett's mind, he was alone in the dark with a possibly dead body beneath him, that was something Jett had never been prepared for. He squeaked in surprise as the Doctor shifted beneath him and the Doctor spoke in a soft voice,
"Well that could have gone better,"
Jett sobbed once, then in a fit of stress and anger managed to curse the Doctor from behind the confines of his gag.
"Dear me. Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?" the Doctor asked as he wormed his bound hands behind Jett's head and managed to untie the gag. The Doctor's grew to the size of saucers as Jett kissed him hard full on the mouth.
"No, but I managed to kiss you..." Jett spoke softly, all of his fear and anger melting away as they continue to lie there awkwardly. "Never do that to me again." Jett's voice rang with authority as he looked hard into the semi-darkness where he knew the Doctor's eyes would be. "I was sure they had killed you. Never. Do. That. Again." Each word punctuated with a kiss.
"Jett," the Doctor said calmly. "I was knocked out, it happens. If I were to die, to well and truly die, you would know without a doubt. And just between you and me, I think the whole of time and space would shudder the day the Doctor dies..."
Jett nodded resting his head on the Doctor's shoulder, suddenly feeling deflated. "Sorry, I should have known better...but they said they were going to kill you, and eat you..." an involuntary shiver raked Jett's body.
"Not to put too fine a point on it Jett, but I think they still plan on it. They just didn't want to risk it when night fell, so they tossed us in here to I don't know, stew in our own juices, become more compliant, die from fear...which means we have to find a way to escape, and we only have until dawn to do it." the Doctor seemed to wiggle and squirm more vigorously, then with a triumphant yell the Doctor wrapped his arms around Jett hugging him tightly. "Managed to get my hands free, in case you didn't notice. Now, hold still. There, your hands should be free as well,"
As soon as the raw hide strips left his wrists, Jett wrapped his arms around the Doctor and the stayed like that for a long moment.
"Right, back to the business at hand, we need to escape," the Doctor announced as they shifted themselves into sitting positions and began to work on the bonds around their ankles. "I seem to remember having been in a situation like this before..." Jett frowned as he waited for the Doctor to finish his thought.
"And?" he asked impatiently.
"And I can't remember for the life of me how we managed to get away. Which means I need to come up with a new plan, a brilliant plan, a plan like no other...well not necessarily like no other, but definitely a brilliant plan none the less."
"And have you got this brilliant oh so wonderful plan figured out?"
"Not yet, but I will have once I've finished talking. Right, let's take stock of our situation." the Doctor stood up and began to pace the entire area of the cave. "We are in a relatively small cave like structure. There is only one entrance we know of, which is blocked off, presumably by a rather large and heavy boulder. There does seem to be a source of fresh air, so there must be a crack, a fissure or even another opening somewhere, which is an encouraging sign, at least we won't suffocate," the Doctor grinned at Jett. "Hmmm this area back here seems to have lovely acoustics, and there seems to be a fair amount of rubbish back here as well, what's this?" Jett could only guess what the Doctor was doing for a few moments.
"Oh you are a beauty. Oh yes! Oh very yes! I am extremely brilliant!" the Doctor praised himself as he sat next to Jett throwing an arm around the boy's shoulder.
"Of course you are," Jett answered slightly leaning into the Doctor's embrace. "But how's that going to help us not turn into some caveman's breakfast?" Jett could almost feel the smug pride radiating off of the Doctor's Cheshire cat grin as he spoke without moving his lips,
"Because we know something which we know, that they don't,"
Jett frowned not following.
""I am the great and powerful Oz! You see I taught Edger Bergen everything he knew. Oh come now Jett, think about it, what better way to fool these people than to give them exactly what they expect. They want us to be gods, and they want to be terrified of us, so I say let's give 'em a show,"
Realization dawned on Jett with a slow smile as the thoughts began to come together in his head.
"Can we really fool them? I mean they've already seen us and know that we're more or less human, at least in their eyes. Do we have what we need to convince them that we are actually terribly terrifying?"
"Oh certainly! I can be terrifyingly terrible," He shot Jett a wink, "At any rate what doesn't scare them will just have to be improvise until they are. Right. So first thing's first, we need some light. Do you still have that lighter I gave you Jett?"
Jett checked his pockets frowning deeply as the fact of the matter hit home.
"No...I think it was knocked out of my hand when they attacked us...I'm sorry Doctor..."
"Never mind that, I'll just use the sonic...except it's in the workroom back in the TARDIS. You know it has been a bit wonky since that sand worm on Tuchonka swallowed it...Ok right, so, no sonic, no lighter, what else do we have?" the Doctor dug around in his pockets for a few moments, seemingly finding nothing, which made the guilt building in Jett's chest expanded to new levels as he thought about that missing lighter. "AH HA!" the Doctor shouted as he pulled out an enormous box of matches. He shook the box, which rattled only lightly and he frowned with concern. He slid open the box only to find two matches inside, one of which was missing its head. "Ah...well then. Hmmm, I suppose we'll just have to make do. I used to use everlasting matches you know, only ever needed one of those for anything ever, that was until about 1666, when some drunk lout knocked it out of my hand right into a large stack of hay, and well I'm sure you've heard about the Great Fire of London...it wasn't really my fault, ok I suppose it was a bit..."
"Doctor, focus please," Jett said trying to hide a smile.
"Hmmm? What? RIGHT!" the Doctor started pacing again, nearly tripping over a large stalagmite. "OUCH! Oh wait...NO! That's brilliant! The final piece we need!" the Doctor started grabbing up arm loads of branches, disappearing into a dark corner of the cave, then stacking them around the stalagmite like a teepee.
"Doctor is there anything I can do to help? I can't really see anything right now, but I can't just sit here an do nothing,"
"Hmm? Oh um, right why don't you grab a branch or bit of wood, warp our bindings around them and bring then over here to me?"
"Doctor, there's not much in the way of branches or wood in here,"
"Then use the bones, there should be plenty of those...OH I found the other entrance, it's small, I'm not sure even you could squeeze out that way...at least we won't suffocate once we get a fire going, and just maybe we'll get enough smoke going to attract some attention...here give us the torches you made, I think I found something extremely useful that may make our lives that much easier." Jett handed the leather wrapped bones to the Doctor who took them and disappeared into the darkness of the cave.
"Excellent!" there was the strike of a match and then a flare of light as one of the torches blazed to life. "Oh yes that is so very excellent. Right, here you go Jett," he handed one of the torches to the boy after lighting his own. "That should last at least long enough for us to get the job done. Give us a hand over here," the Doctor held up a large skull with a mouth full of razor sharp teeth. Jett helped the Doctor heft the enormous skull over to the stalagmite where they set it down over the mass of rock and branches.
"Now what?"
"Now we prime the illusion." He took his torch and lit the wood around the skull, as the fire took hold the shadows and flickers made the skull appear as though it were living. The Doctor grinned mischievously as he grabbed a bundle of branches covered in a black fluid and lit them beneath the back entrance of the cave. "Oh yes that should smoke nicely, and now we just need something to draw their attention to it...I do wish I had a megaphone...I suppose a shout will have to do, Jett you may want to cover your ears,"
The Doctor took a deep lung full of air and bellowed out in a deep voice,
"HEAR ME PEOPLE! HEAR ME! I AM THE GREAT AND POWERFUL OZ! YOU WILL OBEY ME!" Jett winced and coughed a little as the smoke choked him up some and his ears rang from the shouting. "YOU WILL COME TO THE CAVE...THE CAVE OF...UM...THE CAVE OF SKULLS AND HEAR MY WORDS!"
"Do you think that will really help?"
"It certainly can't make things much worse, oH I think I hear something. Sit as close to the skull as you can, opposite me and look up at it as though it were your master and follow my lead," moments later there was a loud grinding sound and the stone was rolled away from the cave entrance.
"What noise?! AHHHHH! MONSTER!" came a yell.
"SILENCE YOU SNIVELING FOOL!," the Doctor threw his voice as loud as possible while still looking humble before the skull. "YOU WILL STOP AND HEAR THE WORDS I SPEAK," Tal and his strongest men all stopped and fell to their knees and the Doctor lowered his projected voice saying, "I am the great and powerful Oz. You will release my servants, or I shall bring down wrath from the heavens and destroy you! If you do as I say, I shall remain and you may take the sacred burning brands from my mouth, as a gift for your obedience."
Tal's tribe were falling over themselves with fear, they had never seen anything like it before, which left Jett almost pitying the poor fools, until he remembered that they had been planning on killing and eating both him and the Doctor.
"What say you Tal? Will you obey the great and Powerful Oz, or will you bring ruin and destruction down on you and your tribe?" Jett's eyes burned from the black smoke billowing around the skull.
"You GO! You go NOW! Oz say you GO!" Tal cried out barely raising his head from the cave floor.
The Doctor stood helping Jett up, they walked away from the huddled mass of groveling caveman flesh. "Easy now," the Doctor whispered. They had barely gotten a few hundred yards away before the cavemen started to get restless, not receiving any new instructions from their new god.
"Ready Jett?" Jett nodded and the Doctor grinned, "Always gotta love the running. Right! Let's go!" they took off running as fast and hard as they could, Jett leading the way back to the TARDIS as best as he could remember. It wasn't long before a few of the braver souls from the tribe had snatched up burning branches and here howling with glee as they took off after the pair.
"So much for blending in eh Doctor?" Jett asked with a little laugh as he skidded to a halt outside the TARDIS
"Yes, well, I am a professional time traveler, I usually can get away with these kinds of things," the Doctor pulled out his key and unlocked the door. "Come along Jett, it's time we were off...I mean now, get in now, right now!" the Doctor dragging Jett inside and slammed the door shut, just in time to hear rocks, spears and other weapons clattering against the door. "Door switch!" Jett ran to the console and threw the door lock switch closing off the TARDIS from the rest of the world. "Well, that was interesting..."
"Don't tell me you're going to try again are you?" Jett asked looking wary.
"Of course I am. It was just a simple miss calculation that's all. I'm certain I can recalculate and still get us to Paris 1894...unless you'd rather go back home..." the Doctor almost looked crestfallen as he said it.
"I'll tell you what Doctor. I reek of smoke and filth. I am going to go get a shower and some fresh clothes, you go do your calculations and then maybe you could join me..." Jett shot him a wink and took off down the corridor, the Doctor grinned to himself looking like a kid in the candy store as he worked the console.