CHAPTER 2

Betrayal

Love is whatever you can still betray. Betrayal can only happen if you love.

-John le Carre

It was quiet here, Tamsin thought. Peaceful, even. She'd walked the better part of the night to find just the right tree in the right field, missing her wrecked truck every step of the way. The bottles in the plastic bags she carried clinked together as she set them down on the ground and took a seat. The sun was just rising. By her reckoning, she had enough whiskey with her to see her through two or three sunrises, and that suited her just fine. Her only immediate plan was to drink herself into a stupor until it was time to go out and find more whiskey so she could repeat the process. She reached into the bag closest to her and pulled out a bottle, unscrewed the top and took a sip. Maybe in a few days she'd find some biker bar to take over. There was sure to be one out here somewhere. In the meantime, she'd sit here in the hot sun, with the smell of dirt and grass filling her nose and concentrate on feeling nothing.

A few hours later, she was a third of the way through the bottle when she heard it. There was a road a good ways back from where she sat. She knew this because she'd walked along it hours ago, her steps lit only by moonlight. It looked little used though, more like a set of parallel dirt tracks with weeds growing up the middle, which is why she'd decided to follow it. But right now, there was someone driving along it. Someone with a shitty car in desperate need of a tune up by the sound of it, she thought, taking another swallow from the bottle in her hand. Whoever it was was just passing through, she told herself. The annoying engine sound would fade off into the distance in a trail of dust soon enough. Tamsin leaned her head back against the rough bark and closed her eyes.

The sound did go away, but instead of tapering off with distance it ended abruptly as the engine was cut off, followed by the slamming of a car door and the sound of someone walking through the tall grass of the field. They were heading in her direction, she knew, and she had a pretty good idea, without looking, who it was. "Shit," she muttered.

A shadow fell across her as Bo stepped into view. Tamsin ignored her in favor of another long pull from the bottle. Maybe if she ignored this bitch she'd take the hint and go away.

"Tracking spell," Bo said simply, then took a seat beside her.

Tamsin didn't really care. "Lucky me," she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. She didn't offer Bo a drink, and she certainly wasn't going to ask Bo what the hell she was doing here. They'd parted company with barely two words to each other in the blown out Dal yesterday. She'd slipped away while the succubus was searching frantically for her phone. It was clear, however, that Tamsin hadn't put enough distance between herself and the succubus. She'd rectify that in a few minutes, once she finished this bottle.

"I need you to find Lauren," Bo said, without preamble. How like her, Tamsin thought, just showing up out of the blue and demanding things. And to be asked to find Bo's human lover when she… Tamsin bit that thought off before it could go any further. She didn't need any reminders about the situation.

"Get Dyson to do it," Tamsin said, scowling. Let Bo's other lover go find her missing one, she thought.

"I can't. He's in Scotland, tracking down Trick," Bo said. "You're all I've got."

"Too bad for you, then." Tamsin tilted the bottle up and drained the last few swallows. Time to get moving.

"I've tracked Kenzi to a town up north. Hale and I need to get to her before she does something stupid," Bo explained. "I can't be in two places at once."

"Guess bff trumps girlfriend every time," Tamsin said, rolling her eyes. "But then, what else is new? I'm sure Doctor Frankenbitch is used to coming in last by now."

Bo turned her face away as if slapped. "Don't call her that," she admonished. "I'd go after her if I could," she added defensively. "As soon as I collect Kenzi I'll join you."

Glaring at Bo, Tamsin tossed the now empty bottle away with more force than was necessary. It sailed off into the distant treeline and smashed somewhere against a rock. "No," she said, taking a perverse pleasure in refusing to help Bo. She pulled out another bottle.

"Look, Lauren is out there, alone," Bo insisted, her voice breaking. "With both the light and dark after her. You're a bounty hunter and a police detective, which means you can find her before they do. You have to find her before they get to her, Tamsin."

"I don't have to do anything except sit here and drink," Tamsin replied. Bo had a lot of balls even asking in the first place. She knew how Tamsin felt, about all they'd just been through with Taft, with Bo's father, and about how Tamsin felt about her. She'd lost control and exposed her feelings, even though she'd fought them with all her strength. And here was Bo, looking so beautiful and being so obliviously cruel. It made her angry and resentful, and that was so much better than the revolting feelings of love and affection she was trying to burn away with liquor. "That bitch needs to be put down, we both know it," she added, noting the way Bo winced with no small amount of pleasure. She wanted to hurt Bo now. Hurt her simply for being Bo. Hurt her for the way the succubus made her feel. Lauren was as convenient a method to achieve that as anything right now.

In fact, something dawned on Tamsin. A way to really wound Bo, destroy her even, if she wanted to. She realized she could do as Bo asked. Find the human, tell Bo she'd found her, and then turn the bitch over to the dark fae. The Morrigan would love that. There'd be nothing Bo could do to save the doctor once she was in Evony's clutches. She'd have to watch her human lover be punished, watch as she was put to death, most likely in some slow and tortuous way. Lauren was human, nothing to her but an easy sacrifice to achieve an even greater end. Maybe even a literal end. Because, if she did this, and if she was very lucky, Bo would kill her for it, and all this misery would be over and done with. Betrayal was a very small price to pay for that release, Tamsin thought, especially if it came at Bo's hand. There was something fitting, poetic almost, to the whole scenario. It was so beautiful and perfect it almost took her breath away.

But, she'd have to be careful, to make it look like changing her mind wasn't too easy all of a sudden or Bo would become suspicious. The succubus trusted her, gods only knew why after everything. But she could use Bo's trusting and naive nature against her this one last time. It would serve her right.

"Tamsin, please. I need your help. I know you're hurt and angry after everything we've been through, but I do still trust you. I trust you with Lauren's life."

Tamsin almost laughed in delight. Bo was begging, this was even better than she'd hoped. The succubus must truly be desperate, she thought, and was using her special brand of cruel sincerity to get her way. Tamsin pretended to ponder the issue, allowed Bo to think her plea was working, and made sure to huff a few times at the succubus in between long draughts from the bottle, before sighing in exasperation. "What's in it for me?" she asked, deciding it might be fun to see how far the succubus would be willing to go.

Relief washed over Bo's face. This was all really too easy, Tamsin thought. "My undying gratitude?" Bo asked, with a hopeful grin.

"Not good enough," Tamsin said with a shake of her head. "You owe me that already."

Bo snorted at that, but didn't argue. "A future favor then," she said, as if the matter were settled. "A big one."

Again, Tamsin shook her head, smirking now.

"What's it going to take, Tamsin?" Bo asked, standing. "Name it, already. I need to get going."

Tamsin tilted her head back and looked at the succubus for several long moments. "A night in your bed," she finally said. "With you. Anything I want." Time to see how far the succubus would go. "Anything," she added, meaningfully. Hell, maybe she'd give Lauren to Bo just for that, once she found the human, if Bo agreed to it.

Bo was offended, she could see. It was so ironic that a creature that lived off sexual energy could have such misguided notions about sex, Tamsin thought.

"Is this a joke?" Bo asked, her lip curling in disgust.

"Nope," Tamsin said. "That's my price. Take it or leave it. It's not negotiable."

Tamsin watched, fascinated as Bo's expression hardened before her eyes, despising her more with each passing second. She looks so much like her father right now, Tamsin thought, that she very nearly wanted to take her offer back, fighting the instinctive urge to serve.

"A one night stand? Seriously?"

Tamsin laughed. "It's just sex," she said. "Isn't that what you do? You should be happy I'm letting you off so easy, because this job is going to be a pain in the ass."

Bo's expression was still angry, but there was something else in her eyes. "But it wouldn't be just sex, would it?" she asked. "We both know there'd be more to it for you. It's a bad idea, Tamsin."

"You fuck people all the time to get what you want," Tamsin said accusingly. "Can't stand a little of your own medicine? Or is it too much like Lauren's little 'spy bang' for you?"

She was getting to Bo, she could see, possibly going too far, as the succubus took a sharp breath and stiffened. "That was different. And between Lauren and me," she said.

"And Kenzi, and Dyson, and Vex, and the whole fucking world," Tamsin spat.

"Fine," she said. For a moment, Tamsin thought she was agreeing to her terms, but then Bo turned and walked away. "Be an asshole. I'll find Lauren without your help."

"Yeah, good luck with that," Tamsin called after her. "I know the people they've sent after her. Most of them are idiots, but there are one or two who'll find her." Bo continued walking, and Tamsin began to panic, realizing she'd pushed too hard. "And they'll be sure to have a little fun with her before they drag her skinny ass back to Evony. If you know what I mean."

Bo stopped, and stood stiffly for a few minutes, her hands clenched at her sides. "What is your problem?" she screamed, clearly angry and frustrated. Bo whirled and stalked back toward Tamsin. "I'm sick of your shit. Whatever your fee is, I'll pay it, but I'm not sleeping with you. Ever. I thought we were starting to become friends, that you cared. But I guess I was wrong." She glanced down and saw a full bottle that had rolled out of one of the bags. Bo reached down and picked it up. "Go back to your pity party," she said, tossing the bottle at Tamsin, who instinctively caught it, with more force than was necessary, enough for a slight shock of pain to travel through Tamsin's hand. "I've got things to do."

"It's always about you, isn't it," she said. She pretended to be defeated, to reel this bitch in so she could get on with her fun.

"No, this is about Lauren," Bo said.

"Bullshit," Tamsin snorted. "I'll find her. I give you my word. Pro bono, even. And maybe someday you'll grow up and stop acting like your shit doesn't stink."

"Hey, my shit stinks plenty," Bo said indignantly, then stopped. They stared at each other for a moment, before Tamsin burst into laughter. "I can't believe you just said that," Tamsin said, almost falling over. Bo tried to glare at her, but when Tamsin didn't stop, she finally gave in, collapsing next to Tamsin. They sat there giggling in the mid-morning sun, with several sacks of whiskey bottles strewn around them, for several minutes.

It could be like this, a quiet, traitorous voice inside of Tamsin said. You don't have to do this terrible thing. You could be part of them, part of her, instead. Even if she never feels for you a fraction of what you feel for her you could still be near her, touch her and see her and hear her. You could pretend to feel alive when you're with her. Ruthlessly, Tamsin stilled that voice. It would never be enough, she reminded herself. It would be torture, to be around her, to pretend to be happy while hiding this sickening feeling of love that welled up in her throat every time she looked at the woman, suffocating her. No, Bo needed to pay for making her feel anything for anyone in the first place, most of all these misplaced feelings of love. If brutally snuffing out Lauren's life would rid her of this, then the sooner she got on with it the better. There was no backing out now. She wouldn't allow herself that luxury.

After a few moments, they sobered. "What if she doesn't want to be found? Nobody forced her to run away," Tamsin said. "She made that choice."

Bo turned away and contemplated the trees in the distance. "Just find her," she said quietly. "I don't want to make her do anything she doesn't want to do. I just need to talk to her."

"Should've tried that before she ran away," Tamsin said, getting to her feet. That didn't get a reaction out of Bo, but she did continue to stare off into the woods, her expression troubled. Tamsin was almost disappointed.

"Just… Just be careful, Tamsin. Don't underestimate Lauren. She's scary smart, and she knows a lot about the fae."

She knows too much about the fae for a human, Tamsin thought. She understood why both sides were after the doctor; she could do some serious damage if she wanted. But Tamsin didn't think the human had the stomach for violence, she was probably cringing in a hole somewhere, alone and afraid. "Please, she may be Doctor Perfect to you, but to me she's just another pathetic human," Tamsin said dismissively.

"And, she doesn't like you very much," Bo added.

"The feeling's mutual," Tamsin said. After saying that Lauren had to die it was probably the most truthful thing she'd said to Bo this whole conversation. "I need a ride back to town," she added, wiping her hands off on the back of her jeans. She reached down and snagged the handles of her plastic bags.

Bo shook her head. "I'm heading in the opposite direction, and I don't have time to chauffeur you around," she said, stalking off through the tall grass toward the road.

"Bitch," Tamsin called after Bo's retreating back, though she'd have probably done the same thing.

"I'm sure you can manage," Bo said over her shoulder with a smile. "Find her, Tamsin. Keep her safe until I get there," she added.

Tamsin watched the leather-clad figure walk through the grass to the yellow shit heap she called a car. "Oh, I'll find her, all right," she whispered. "As for keeping her safe, well…" Tamsin tracked the car as Bo drove off in a cloud of dust. If she couldn't have Bo's heart, Tamsin thought, her expression hardening, she'd turn it to ash by destroying the one who did.

But first, she needed to steal a car.