Note: Many thanks go out to my reviewers, Im like in a hurry right now so yah.
I wanted to just say, that there's no character bashing in my fic, except for maybe Herman(The Pokemon Trainer) and JigglyPuff. I definately do not bash Pit. I love Pit. But um, if you guys meant that the characters in the story bash Pit with bullying, then dont worry you guys, they will ALL get what's coming to them, even Bowser. Pit will have his moments, so just wait. That kinda bothered me so yah. and thanks for crit. you guys. Im going to edit the first chapter later so if you notice changes, then dont panic!
It's just me correcting errors!
I also lold at a review I had, LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!! YOU MOFOS!
But if you guys have a problem with me bashing JigglyPuff and Herman then let me know and I'll stop.
Any suggestions for the next character? I have a couple in mind...
Also Bowser's story was way too getting long, so I just cut it short for now, I'll continue later when I do the others.
'Bowser, well, he doesnt really consider himself to have friends, just acquintances, every single morning he would pick on poor 'FairyFag'. Poor guy. He also picks on everyone else as someone mentioned. Hes also been going on the internet lately, so every now and then Bowser would use that retarded ass internet slang, the guy seriously needs a freakin' life..and a girlfriend...considering his access to the internet has been increasing each day.'
When Bowser came home from visiting his usual minions and offspring. He instantly went for the laptop that he left on the couch. He had been wanting to go on the internet all day. He turned on the laptop and waited for it to start. Sitting there, he pondered what kind of comments he had been left with from EncyclopediaDramatica and other various websites.
Thats when he noticed something.
"Snake, have you been using my laptop again?" Bowser shouted irritably when he noticed that his files of screenshots were moved again.
"No." A muffled voice sounded near him.
Bowser looked to his right to see a large box sitting by him.
"What the? What are you doing in there?"
"None of your business."
"Are you beating it off?"
"No!"
"Yah right, you Fapster."
"Fapster?"
"Shutup."
Finally, Bowser was able to access his Internet. It always seem to take a large amount of time when loading pages. Bowser let out a groan. When the page loaded, he clicked a few times and waited impatiently for the new page to load again.
"Do you know whos been on my int-ar-nets? "
Snake stiffled a snicker.
"I saw Pit and Mini-man go on. " Snake said.
Bowser looked down at the box and cocked a brow.
"Are you sure? You're not lying to me so you could get Pit into trouble are you? Cuz I could just whoop his ass anytime. " Bowser questioned suspiciously.
"Uhh...No. I think I may have seen Marth go on for a second too. "
"Pit will get what he deserves later, NOBODY touches my crap and gets away with it. "
"What about Marth and Mini-Man?"
"Forget them."
Bowser looked back at his laptop screen to see if it was done loading, to his surprise, he found a message.
(Someone Has left You a Flame, click HERE to go to your fgt userpage)
Bowser smirked.
Ha, no doubt its a message about my brilliant writing about Mario.
Bowser then clicked on the link. Bowser gasped to find a rather hateful flame towards him.
You are a faggot, I blanked your relly fuking stubid artikl, becase it was full of uter closterfuk fail, you are a pese of shit, DIE, and get out of ED, nobody wants you here. AwesomeDude
Who in the fucking hell is AwesomeDude?
Bowser gritted his teeth, clenching his fists.
Why, if I ever find out who it is, they're in for some slaughtering!
He can't even spell correctly, the faggot! I bet he's a 12 year old basementdweller!
Bowser began to type furiously.
An explosion was heard suddenly, the smell of burnt clothing and flesh was in the air. Bowser stopped to examine the box. The sound came from inside the box, since there's black smoke coming out of the box.
A burnt Snake crawled out of the box and slowly crawled his way out of the room without a word.
Bowser returned to typing furiously, almost smashing his poor laptop with his sharp nails.
"Hey...What are you doing?" Samus had walked in quietly and was peering over Bowser's shoulder, almost leaning on it.
"Nothing!" Bowser growled covering his screen.
"What are you guys talking about?"
Snake walked in with fresh looking clothes and sat by Bowser.
"Bowser's lookin' at porn. You might wanna leave him alone." Samus said as she walked into the kitchen.
"Aw really? Let me see." Snake said stupidly, attempting to look at the hand covered screen.
"It's not porn!" Bowser shouted and moved his hand. "That Samus, always pissin' people off with her faggotry."
"Faggotry?" Snake repeated, sounding a little annoyed.
"I heard that."
Bowser snickered.
Samus is so much fun to fool around with.
"Samus, did you go to that new gun-shop that was built on Arm Street?" Snake questioned standing up and stretching.
"Uh, yah." Samus answered from the kitchen.
Snake entered the kitchen, leaving from Bowser's sight.
"Hey, I was gonna go there yesterday, but it was visiting day for me, so I couldn't...So how was it?"
"It was okay, didnt have much that I already have."
"Aww, that's a shame. Did you get that bomb laser you were talking about?"
Bowser turned his attention to his laptop, the conversation grew faint when Bowser thought long and hard about his response to the negative comment. His response is perfect enough, so he sent it to the retard who dared question Bowser's authority.
A quick movement caught his eye, Bowser shot his arm out to grab the little fucker that was messing with his laptop.
"Hey you little RUNT, didn't Link teach you NOT to use people's stuff?"
"Ay! Let go Bowser!" Mini-Me retorted, punching and kicking at thin air.
Bowser laughed and spun Mini-Me around with a single nail in amusement.
"What were you doing on my laptop you turd?"
"I was playing games!"
"What were you doing moving my stuff on my computer!?"
"I didn't!" Mini-Me pleaded.
"Next time I see you on my laptop or hear about it, you're deadmeat squirt."
"O-Okay."
With a kick from Bowser's foot, he sent Mini-Me flying out the window.
Bowser looked back to his laptop, he hoped AwesomeDude will comment soon. With a sigh, he closed his laptop.
"Hey Bowser, we're gonna go trip grannies in the retirement home. We're gonna do it on the stairs too, so we could watch them tumble down the stairs."
Bowser looked to his left and found himself staring at a fat short man with a cricked mustache and his fat penguin friend.
"Tripping grannies down the stairs? You guys are pathetic."
"So are you in or out?"
Bowser looked back to Snake, wondering if Snake was doing something more appealing.
A smirking Snake sat at the kitchen table talking with Samus.
Bowser frowned at the idea.
I don't think so.
"Okay Im in."
"I thought you said we were pathetic?" DeDeDe said narrowing his eyes.
"Yeah, well, Im a hypocrite. Sue me."
"All right!" Wario smirked.
All three moved out.
--+
Bowser trudged in, slamming the door on DeDeDe's face.
"Must check internet." Bowser murmered as he tottered his way to his room.
"Hey Bowser, what are you gonna do to Pit tonight?"
"Later!" Bowser shouted, his pace hastened.
He heard a faint response of 'sheesh' as he walked.
In order for Bowser to reach his room, he would have to take an elevator because his room was on the last floor, and it's the last door in the hallway.
Bowser pushed the button, which lit up once pressed.
He had the last floor and room because MasterHand hated his guts. The reason why was that MasterHand saw right through him. Behind Bowser's mischievous' bad behavior, laid a pathetic, sad, wimpy, crying, lonely monster who's reason's for acting so badly is to solely get attention.
Bowser never told anyone about it, it didn't matter to him.
If he ever decided to spill it out, it would only ruin him and make him more miserable.
He didn't care that he was this way, nor does he care that MasterHand knows him.
Who in the hell would want a crying wimpy turtle anyways?
It's stupid to cry and whine about it. Bowser's easier way of handling his inner problems is to pick on other losers to boost his self esteem, and kidnap princesses.
Ahh...Peach...good times...
The only effect that MasterHand has on his knowledge of Bowser is that there's this uncomfortable, weird relationship between them.
Like last Thursday for instance;
Bowser walked into the elevator, pushed the arrow key, leaned against the ridge, and crossed his arms.
"Hey."
Without giving a glance, Bowser replied,"Hey."
MasterHand coughed.
Bowser tapped the floor with his foot in annoyance.
Music needs to be changed to heavy metal or something...
Why isn't he talking?
Uncomfortable moment here, better say something.
Lets play a game, it'll be more fun that way.
Let the games begin...
"Ike told me that he saw you touching my shit again. Frankly, Im tired of you touching my stuff with your dirty ass fingers and throwing it out. Can you not do that? I always have to pick it up from the yard or I have to go to Samus' or Snake's or whoever the fuck's room to get it. It's annoying. Stop it, or I'm going to beat the hell out of you."
That felt good.
Now it's MasterHand's turn, and it being MasterHand, it will always turn ugly with his juvenile and nasty temper ways.
He's going to play the nice, calm faggot card.
"Well Bowser, if you hadn't let your shit be laying around all the fucking time, I wouldn't be throwing it out now would I? I like my castle clean bitch, and if you leave your shit around, it'll throw it out, I'm not your screaming birth mother, clean up after yourself you fucking douche." He says calmly as predicted.
Bowser felt his temper rise, but had to keep his cool.
This is a game, a game of who can stay calm the longest.
Bowser narrowed his eyes.
"If you hadn't put me in that shitty last room, I wouldn't always be leaving my crap all over the place."
MasterHand didn't even move.
"If you weren't such a pathetic fucking douche, you wouldn't have that problem."
Bowser shifted his leg.
"So you hate me more than those fags; Pit, Yoshi, Pikachu, Herman, and JigglyPuff enough for you to put me in that crappy room? You have lame tastes for detesting certain people you moron."
MasterHand twitched.
Ha.
Struck a nerve finally.
"FUCK YOU FAT FUCKING TORTOISE BASTARD." He yelled.
Its rare that he gets to MasterHand like that. It was usually the other way around. It was quiet the rest of the elevator ride.
Awkward silence.
MasterHand mad as hell. Bowser smirking triumphantly. When it was MasterHand's stop, he floated out quite quickly and passed by Pikachu who greeted him with a hello.
"Shutup you fucking yellow rat." He growled in the distance.
Pikachu had a weird look.
He entered the elevator a moment later.
"Whats gotten into him?" Pikachu mumbled, pressing the button.
Bowser smirked.
The elevator finally opened.
Bowser stepped in. He smiled once he saw who was in it.
"Uh..Uhh..Uh..Hi Bowser."
An evil grin stretched from his lips.
"Hello Pit." Bowser replied punching the button.
The doors closed.
"So uhh...What did you do today?"
"The usual," He smirked, then he remembered something and continued,"Hey Pit, have you been on my laptop?"
"Uhh...Yeah..."
"Did you move the files on my desktop? And what were you doing on it? Since when do angels go on computers? Really."
"I was looking up information."
Bowser growled. Pit is soo gonna get it for even touching his beautiful laptop.
"Dont go on my laptop again Pit."
"U-Um, okay." Pit stuttered.
"Look, I don't want any problems Bowser, how about we squash this?"
Look at him, the fag. He's shaking already, and I haven't even threatened him yet...
What should I do to him today?
Hmm...
Suddenly Bowser punched him in the face. Making Pit stumble back, grasping his cheek.
"What was that for!? "
"What? "
Pit didn't say anything, but merely stared at him.
Upon realizing what was about to happen, Pit quickly started to push the button repeatedly, sweating.
Bowser cracked his knuckles, he wasn't really in the mood for torturing Pit creatively like always, so he will give Pit an old fashioned beating.
"Oh Palutena..."
Bowser trudged out, leaving behind a dismembered Pit groaning in pain.
When he got to the end of the hallway, he inserted his keys in and turned. Bowser slammed the door open and slammed it shut when he entered. He sat on his bed and turned on his laptop.
A growl escaped his lips.
He sooo hated waiting. When the computer loaded the desktop and files, Bowser clicked on Internet Explorer.
It was dark already, and the light from his laptop illuminated his face a bit with blue shadows.
"Time to go on the int-ar-nets.."
Bowser decided to visit one of his favourite websites, and Lulz4Us.com
He smiled.
"Bastards would love these pictures."
He clicked a few times before he started laughing uncontrollably. A loud knocked suddenly erupted from his door.
Why are people bothering me so much today? Leave me at peace people!
"WHAT!?" Bowser growled.
"It's Samus."
"God, what do you want? Can't you hear me typing?" He snapped.
Samus took a while before responding,"Forget it.." a shuffling of feet was heard before the castle grew silent again.
Probably got angry or something. Pfft...get the heck out of here stupid Samus. Pfft...women...who needs em'? She's not really a woman though...she's more like...a man...like...a sheman...hahahaha...better pick on her about that tomorrow.
Bowser returned to looking at his laptop screen. Bowser smirked at the comments he had received;
I LOLED
You sir, are made of win!
LOL
Much lulz was had here!
WE DINE ON SPARTA LULZ TONIGHT
Wat teh fuk? You go here 2? You riuning everthing for me you fuking fag.
That was some good lulz there.
pffft.
Wait a minute...WHAT?
Bowser squinted his eyes.
Wat teh fuk? You go here 2? You riuning everthing for me you fuking fag.
Bowser squinted harder.
Wat teh fuk? You go here 2? You riuning everthing for me you fuking fag.
He squinted even harder.
Wat teh fuk? You go here 2? You riuning everthing for me you fuking fag.
He glared.
you fuking fag.
His eyes burned with hate.
fuking fag.
Hate washed all over his body.
fag.
Bowser looked at the screen again.
fag
Bowser roared, throwing things off his bed. After getting done throwing his small fit, bowser began typing furiously;
Who are you?
Bowser waited a few minutes before he received a response.
Its me AwesomeDude u fuking fag, GTFU Lulz4Us you retard.
Bowser types angrilly;
You need to learn how to spell you fucking retard.
A response with an explicit image appeared afterwards;
That maybe so, but I fuked you in the ass and now ur butthurt.
Bowser looked at the other responses;
Wow he's a butthurt fag.
Can't believe I thought that fgt was cool.
Yup a Butthurt response is a butthurt response.
LOL he got burnt
Bowser types furiously;
WTF /b/ he can't even spell!
With that response left, he exits the website.
"This guy got bastards to turn on me. Who is this guy?"
Bowser clicks his way to Encyclopediadramatica, to see what comments he was left with.
When a window pops up suddenly;
AwesomeDude: Were u going?
AwesomeDude:You chiken...nobody likes u...
Bowser exits the window and blocked him.
He clicks a little more before reaching to his page, a comment was left there by AwesomeDude as predicted. Bowser roared and flipped his bed over. Bowser thrashes everything about, growling and snarling. Completely full of uncontrollable rage, he throws out his beautiful laptop without a second thought. Stomping on his floor and howling out wildly.
WHO IS AWESOMEDUDE!?