Do Not…
Chapter Two: Do Not Push The Red Button

Pairings: None
Waring: ooc, AU, swearing
Scene: Takes place in a normal looking grocery store.

"Hey Marco, could you watch Luffy while I go do some errands. I don't trust him alone and all his friends are busy for the day. If you do decide to watch him, I have two rules. One: Do not, I repeat, do NOT let him out of your sight for even a SECOND. Fucker's like Waldo: Here one second and BAM! You can't find him until he causes a shit-load of trouble. Rule two: Do not let him get into ANY trouble. You'll only have to watch him for three hours, tops."

"Sure, I'll keep an eye on him."

Marco never thought one teen could be so fucking hard to watch. He had turned away from Luffy for ten seconds at the most and the teen had already ran down several isles, leaving Marco to give a curse of frustration. Marco, Whitebeard's best and most responsible and laid back worker, was having the most difficult time babysitting a seventeen year old.

He thanked the gods above Thatch wasn't there to tease the shit out of him every second that passed.

Marco turned around again and found Luffy was missing and found him across the isle looking at candy. "Luffy, come here." Luffy happily obeyed, giving that damn goofy grin that made it so hard for Marco to be mad at him. "Please, try to stay by the cart." The teen simply laughed.

"Alright, fine, I will." Marco was tempted to use one of those child leash backpacks on the teen for a second, but decided against it. He'd get so many weird looks from passerby's. With one last thing on his list, he turned away from Luffy for a second. One. Fucking. Second.

And in that one fucking second, the teen disappeared completely. He wasn't down one of the isles, he wasn't climbing up an employee's work ladder, he wasn't drooling at any food. He was completely and utterly gone.

To say Marco was panicking to find the teen would have been a very big understatement. Ace had made it extremely clear that he didn't want Luffy to get into any trouble. And Marco, being the responsible adult that he was, promised Ace he wouldn't let that happen. Because Marco never broke his promises. Ever. He ran around the store twice already and ran his hand through his blind hair. "Fuck," he swore under his breathe. He looked to the side and suddenly noticed a door that read DO NOT ENTER: EMPLOYEES ONLY slightly ajar. He paled.

No.

No, no, no, no, no!

Dashing for the door, he yelled, "Luffy! Don't touch a single thi–" Several alarms rang through out the store, turning the sprinklers on. All the doors and windows locked and the normal lights turned into red flashing ones as the security members surround Marco with their guns and tasers out. Luffy exited the room not a second later and he too was surround by security officers.

"Put your hands up in the air and lie on the ground!"

Well, this sucked.

Marco gave a deep sigh.

'I knew I should have used a backpack leash...'

Down at the jail, Marco and Luffy sat behind bars as they waited for Ace to come pick them up. Marco couldn't believe one teen could cause so much trouble! Finally, Ace appeared to talk to the guard. "Sorry about that," he spoke as he signed a paper the guard handed him. "My little brother's kind of retorted–"

"Oi! I am not retarded, jerkass!"

"–and is in a state of denial, as you just witnessed. He has this thing where if he sees something that says 'Do Not Push The Red Button', he will go and push the red button."

In the background, Thatch was staring at Marco through the bars, a rather smug look on his face. "What's this? Marco, our first commander who never screws up, is behind bars? Le gasp! This cannot be! Oh, what have you done, you poor, poor soul–"

"Thatch, if you value any part of your life or manhood, I would shut the fuck up. Now." Thatch made a zipper-like motion across his grin. Oh, he was never gonna let Marco live this down.

Ace finished signing the release forms and the officer gave him one last paper to sign, looking back at the arrested teen. "It must be hard raising a teen like that." Ace gave a tight smile and replied in a strained voice as he gripped the pen tightly, nearly breaking it as he finished signing his signature.

"You have no idea, sir."

Luffy gulped in the background.

This was going to be a very pain filled week.

And it was all thanks to the Big Red Button.

XxXxX
Because lets face it, those backpack leashes do come in handy sometimes.

I actually wanted a chinese man to come out of nowhere and beat up Luffy like in Family Guy, but decided to go with this. Ah, it's so fun to torture Marco! XD

Anyway, next chapter will be:
Do Not Go To A Rival's Convention.
Quick Sum: Luffy accidentally walks into a Naruto conventions. Bad move, Lu!

Stay tuned~