"Isn't this amazing?" Koizumi asked as we walked through the carnival, complete with a lofty smile as he turned his head around, inspecting everything with great curiosity, just like Haruhi and Asahina-san were doing up front (obviously with lesser restraint than Koizumi). Nagato merely walked behind us, nose-deep in a new book.

"Yeah, unbelievable…" I muttered. "Especially if you consider the convenience of the whole matter."

"You're talking about the school, aren't you? And not just this carnival's sudden appearance?"

"Yeah, of course. What else?"

"Hmm, that is quite understandable, all things considered. But as always, we cannot be fully certain of what is going on. Perhaps this is just a – for lack of a better word – a normal carnival. But then again, maybe this is all just as well Suzumiya-san's doing or maybe…"

Oh great, what is this? A dramatic pause? You've gotta be kidding me! Just when did you develop a sadistic tendency like this?

"There is something else going on in the shadows, by our mysterious 'enemies'…" Koizumi said rather ominously, before chuckling lightly. "Best keep a keen lookout, eh?" He actually nudged my side playfully after that, before returning to look at all the stands and performers.

Nice, thanks a lot, Koizumi. As if I hadn't been worried enough as it were.

As Haruhi pulled the tense Asahina-san after her, with the smiling Koizumi silently following them, towards a stall with tin cans piled up for throwing at, I gave the last member of our group a look. Without even looking up from her book, she stopped right in front of me just before crashing into me. She lifted her eyes from her book momentarily to glimpse at the cause of her sudden need to stop, but noticing that it was only me standing in front of her, she returned her eyes to her book and then slowly walked after the others, still reading.

Hmm… She seems rather unfocused, doesn't she? I wonder if it's because –

Ah, whatever. It's just my paranoid mind overworking itself. It's to be expected when having to deal with all the crazy stuff I'm confronted with on such a frequent basis, after all. I should just relax and enjoy the week as much as I can. Surely nothing sinister will happen in such an open place, even though the circumstances under which this carnival did pop up are rather suspicious. Sometimes, coincidences do happen.

Here's hoping this is one of those times. Seriously, I could use a vacation. And what better place to relax than a carnival? Of course, I'll have to put up with Haruhi, but I can also enjoy the company of everyone else. Oh, I know! I'll have Koizumi entertain Haruhi, since that's basically his job, as I understand it. Then maybe I'll get some nice alone time with Asahina-san! Ah, what bliss that would be! Or maybe I'll take Na–

"Hey! Stop daydreaming in the middle of the streets, Kyon! Get over here and win me a stuffed battle alligator!"

Can't you do it yourself? I mean, you can pitch like a pro!

"Of course I could, easily even! That's exactly why I'm not doing it. I'd clean this place out all by myself! – No, Mikuru, aim higher! – So instead, I'm making sure you all win ones by yourself as rewards! It builds character!"

Then why do I have to win one for you? I thought we were to be rewarded for our efforts. That certainly would send the right impression, wouldn't it?

"Idiot! I'm building your character most, since you need it the most!" Haruhi exclaimed, pointing an authorative finger at me. "Nothing builds character like loss! I don't have time to waste using conventional methods with the likes of you. We need quick results!"

Conventional methods... just how is any of this conventional? And just what is wrong with my character? Other than being the only one to ever object to your insane schemes?

Haruhi had however focused her attention fully on Asahina-san by now, who was desperately trying to get her throws to go in the right direction. She had already hit someone else's target, and was blushing profusely because of this. Of course, with Haruhi shouting advice behind her back in a rather aggressive manner, this feeling of inadequacy was probably only increasing.

"Could you keep it down? People are starting to look," I muttered with embarrassment as I approached my friends.

"Sure, just as soon as everyone wins something. No! Now your aim is way too high! Why can't you be more like Yuki? She got it on the first try!"

I peered around and noticed that Nagato had indeed succeeded in winning a prize already. Apparently, she had received a grey owl as a reward, or maybe she had chosen it herself (I have no idea, since I wasn't there when it happened). Then again, if you could decide your prize, I have no doubt that Haruhi would have intervened and chosen something for Nagato in her place. In any case, the taciturn girl was back to reading again, with the cute little owl held under an armpit, the stuffed animal looking rather forlorn in that position.

Koizumi on the other hand was making a commendable effort. He had hit most of his targets, a few cans on the top, and was apparently on his last ball. He squinted with concentration, taking a long while to aim. He actually raised his other hand and held up a thumb as if to aim with it, kind of like one of those artists trying to grasp the proper perspective or something, measuring distances and angles. Eventually, he did throw his last ball – and lo and behold! – did succeed in toppling over the remaining cans. For a reward, he chose a turtle.

I would probably have spent more time considering these choices in prizes a bit more , if Haruhi hadn't made me start trying to win my own prize (for her). I don't even know why she's calling it a battle alligator, it's just a demented looking lizard with over-sized teeth in actuality.

We remained at the booth for a good 15 minutes. I swear, if I had been given the chance to do this on my own, I would have probably won that stupid lizard on my second try at the very least. That goes double for the blushing Asahina-san. But what can you do, when you have a crazy weirdo shouting in your ear when you're trying to concentrate? Both of our attempts were ultimately rendered pointless. Haruhi decided to give up on us, grudgingly, before she took our places and immediately won us our prizes; for Asahina-san, a cute koala, while my prize naturally went to Haruhi herself. For no apparent reason, she had decided to get a shark instead. Make of that what you will, although I would like to point out a few things sharks and alligators share in common: both ancient predators with big teeth and rather nasty tempers. You don't want to get on their wrong side in a literal or figurative way.

After that, we wandered about aimlessly until Haruhi spotted an ice cream vendor. With surprising politeness, she asked what everyone wanted. Koizumi asked for a pear-flavoured one, Asahina-san asked for strawberry, Nagato didn't say anything as she continued reading so we decided to get her uncontroversial vanilla, and Haruhi said she wanted me to choose for her, saying she wanted it to be a surprise. As she sent me to buy everyone the ice cream (with my own money of course), I realized that the reason for her asking what everyone wanted in that seemingly polite manner had merely been a way for me to take everyone's orders. I can't believe I'm still unable see through such obvious tricks beforehand…

After paying a ridiculously high price for the ice creams, which was only to be expected in such a place of profit as a carnival, I slowly began my journey back towards the others, carefully balancing everyone's ice cream cones. This was a task that proved to be surprisingly difficult in the hot weather where the ice creams started melting immediately and because the press of the crowd was on me constantly in the form of careless jostling. I tried to weave through the crowd while craning my head constantly, seeking safe routes in the dense forest of people. This proving too slow a process, I decided to double back and go behind the row of food stalls where there were fewer people, if any.

As I had thought, this was a far better way to gain access to the benches where everyone else was. Soon I had emerged from the little corridor behind the stalls and was making my triumphant return to the others with all the ice cream fully intact. It's odd how peaceful it all seems from an outsider's perspective. There she is, a regular looking, pretty school girl, surrounded by an assortment of friends as she goes on about something exciting. Another equally sexy girl listens with restrained curiosity while a handsome looking guy smiles, shaking his head at the conversation. And then there is yet another great looking girl, reading next to them. Because she is sitting so close to the others, you'd assume that she is just as much a part of the group as all the others, perhaps reading with half-hearted concentration while keeping an ear out for gossip or other tidbits (or is it titbits? sounds a bit dirty).

I looked around, having a sudden need to contrast this innocent scene with the normal world around me. And sure enough, I could see several other groups of people behaving in a similar looking manner. Like over there. There was a girl who –

But before I had fully had the time to give the other girl my full attention, something tripped me. It sent me flying along with all the ice creams. The worst part about this, easily overshadowing the slight bruising I received from the tumble, was that our frozen snacks went flying straight for the others. Both Haruhi and Asahina-san were hit in the chest, while Koizumi was hit in the face (hah, at least there was some luck!). Nagato on the other hand caught her vanilla cone before it hit her without even raising her head from her book. With one hand supporting the book by its spine, she caught the thing and merely gave it an inquisitive lick before continuing reading, eyes never leaving the text.

Haruhi stomped over to my fallen body, glaring dangerously. When she got close to me, she put her hands on her hips and bent over to look down directly in my face with a death glare, or her energizing one. I still can't fully tell which is which even by now. She then proceeded to glare some more at me, before she pointed at her messy chest.

"Chocolate? That was your big surprise? Chocolate?!"

Uhm, yeah sorry about the lack of originality… Now if those were all your concerns regarding this incident, how about we move onto –

"And you ruined my uniform! Along with Mikuru-chan's! What, was this some sneaky, ill-planned attempt at getting us to undress?"

"No, I just tripped over some-"

"Silence! I'll think about your punishment as the two of us go and change." Haruhi gave an indignant huff before she strode off, nose held high, to drag Asahina-san along with her to an undisclosed location.

"You guys stay here! Anyone who moves and has fun without the two of us will be forced to run through the carnival dressed only in diapers, shouting 'Change me! I made a doodoo' continuously for hours!" Haruhi shouted over her shoulder as she and Asahina-san disappeared into the crowds around us.

Sit right here? Fine by me. It'll probably be the most relaxed moment I'll get out of this week. So, fare thee well, Haruhi! Although I'll miss Asahina-san's sweet presence, I can barely wait to find out what they'll change into… just something more casual or maybe even something a bit more – best stop right there before my brain overheats in this already hot weather.

While I was trying to not let my imagination run wild with lovely images of Haruhi and Asahina-san in various states of dress (and undress, I must shamefully admit), Koizumi had finished wiping his face off with a handkerchief he'd pulled from his pocket. He then walked over to me, where I was still lying on the ground, casually resting my head against a supporting hand as I gazed dreamily at the skies.

"My, I've never had my ice cream delivered in such a direct manner," Koizumi said, cracking a slight smile.

"Haha, very funny. A real comedian you are. Seriously, forget physics and philosophy, and go on a road show."

Koizumi gave an amused hum, before he sat down next to me on the ground, peering about.

"So what was it that caused you to trip?"

"Dunno," I answered, looking back the way from which I'd come. I spotted some sort of plastic toy on my path. "Guess it was that toy… I could've sworn it wasn't there when I started walking towards you guys."

"Well, perhaps you were distracted by something," Koizumi said, giving the toy a critical look.

"Yeah, I guess… We're not gonna just sit here on the ground, are we?"

"Not if you don't want to. We could very well join Nagato-san at the benches."

I gave the girl a look. As if on cue, she gave her melting ice cream another quick lick.

"Well it sure as hell beats sitting on the ground like some losers," I said as I got up, dusting myself off.

"Heh, I suppose so."

So the two of us walked over and joined Nagato on the bench, with me in the middle of these two strange people. Nagato kept focused on her book, always giving her ice cream a lick just before it melted its way onto her hand. Impressive precision, considering how she never takes her eyes off the printed text. Koizumi leaned back, adopting a relaxed pose.

We sat there for a while, simply enjoying the sounds, smells and presence of the carnival. The cacophony of sounds seemed to have a rhythm to it, like waves breaking on a rocky coast. The smells of sweet, salty and fatty foods mixed together, forming an oddly intoxicating scent that triggered a favourable response in one's brain, a primal yearning for all the quick energy one could get, an instinct rendered more harmful than useful in the present times of abundance in food. And all of this, along with the presence of the people around us, seemed to weigh on our hearts like gravity. It was all oddly relaxing, just sitting here, soaking in the atmosphere of it all.

I closed my eyes and allowed my mind to wander once again.

…

……

………

"Hey, Kyon, how do I look?"

"Divine… simply divine, ma dear…"

"Hih, thanks…"

"No prob. I enjoy complimenting real beauty."

"…You're not even looking."

"…Yes I am. You look great."

"Wake up, idiot!"

"Huh?"

"I SAID, WAKE UP!"

Wah? I opened my eyes. There Haruhi was, standing in front of me, face almost touching mine. She looked kind of irritated, to put it lightly.

"What were you mumbling about? I couldn't understand a word," Haruhi asked, raising an eyebrow.

Oh man! What had I just said? I must have been dreaming or something. But I can't remember what it was about. You know, one of those dreams where it practically evaporates completely as you open your eyes and only a general recollection of the feeling you had remains, or maybe you don't, but this is what had happened to me. The bliss I was feeling after my dream was creating a terrifying contrast with the fear wrestling in my gut. This volatile cocktail was wrecking havoc on my nerves as I stared apprehensively at the angrily questioning face of Haruhi.

"Uh, nothing…" I hazarded a nervous reply, before adding honestly, "Can't even remember anymore."

"Hmf." Haruhi pulled back, flicking her hair out of her eyes in the slight breeze. As she finally gave me some personal space, I could get a proper look at her new outfit: sandals, short blue skirt and a loose, light pink tank top with yellow flower patterns on it. She hitched up the long strap of a small bag on her shoulder carelessly as she walked off. I guess she'd gone all the way home to change… Wait, just how long had I been out?

"Almost an hour," Koizumi answered helpfully, putting the newspaper he'd been reading aside.

Oh… I looked to my left and saw Nagato still reading there next to me, minus the ice cream. Huh, looks like I didn't miss much. Although I wonder where everyone's stuffed toys have gone.

"Mikuru-cha~an! You look good enough to eat!" Haruhi said with cattish delight, instantly drawing my full and undivided attention in her direction. "Even though you're wearing my old clothes, you look great!"

It's not often that I agree wholeheartedly with Haruhi, but this was definitely one of those rare times. Standing before us, Asahina-san was sporting a t-shirt far too tight for her with a teddy bear's head on it stretched to its limits across her ample chest. She was also wearing what looked like an old, frayed pair of jeans that ultimately functioned more as a pair of shorts in their deteriorated state.

"Wh-why couldn't I take any of y-your more current p-pieces of clothing?" Asahina-san whimpered, starting to go crimson as other people started to notice her state of dress. There were a bit too many hungry looks in the crowd, if you ask me.

"Because none of them would have looked as sexy on you as these!" Haruhi exclaimed, hugging the flustered girl tightly. This action garnered a lot more attention from the people looking at us, but it was nothing compared to what came next. I think people actually started gathering around us after that.

Haruhi buried her face in Asahina-san's chest and rolled her face happily against the teddy face. "So cuuu~uute!" she squealed as she continued the unrelenting nuzzling.

"EEEEEEEKH!!" Asahina-san went as all attention in the vicinity of our group was solely fixed on her and Haruhi.

Ok, I understand why this is getting so much attention, since after all, I would like to see more, but I can't just sit back while the poor girl is being humiliated like this in public. I have to do something. So I got up and quickly pulled Haruhi off ("Hey! What the hell gives, Kyon?!") and put my school uniform's jacket over Asahina-san's shoulders. Naturally, this got a rather loud grumbling from almost all of the male audience that had stopped to watch the show.

Sure, this probably wasn't as tantalizing a sight as the previous one, but for me, seeing the girl wrapped tightly in my very own jacket filled me with an odd sense of pride. I guess it would be something akin to an animal marking its territory. (I know, it's a horribly demeaning analogy, but I thought it was rather accurate of the way I felt at the time. Please forgive me, Asahina-san.)

"Th-thank you," Asahina-san mumbled, keeping her burning cheeks toward the ground.

"Sometimes I just don't get you, Kyon," Haruhi said with slightly pouting lips and a soft frown, hands on her hips.

What the hell's that supposed to mean? Of course I'd protect a girl like Asahina-san from the hungry looks of hyenas. As if I could even contemplate about doing something else.

"Hmm, you're so different from most guys, but I guess that's just what makes you…" Haruhi's voice trailed off. She looked almost contemplative.

Uhm, hello? You know, stopping in the middle of sentences like that is probably a sure sign of mental instability. Not that there was any real doubt before in my mind, but –

"Come on! We've wasted enough time here already. I wanna go see the circus act. I hear they have lions and dangerous sword tricks for display!" Haruhi said, breaking her sudden reverie abruptly with her usual over-exuding excitement. She marched forth, the audience that had gathered to watch us parting immediately to let her pass, as she waved for us to follow her.

Naturally I had to pay for the tickets. But at least I got to choose the seating arrangement (ME – Asahina-san – Nagato – Koizumi – Haruhi). This ingenious manipulation on my part was rendered pointless however as I took my seat and Haruhi sat right next to me, without even looking at her seat number. She just sat down and told Nagato to sit next to her. I wondered why she had done this, but apparently it was only so that she could take Nagato's little book away from her. Haruhi pocketed the book in her small pouch and said that Nagato had done enough reading for the day. It was time to sit back and enjoy the show. Resistance was futile.

Sure enough, the circus act did indeed contain lions, sword tricks, fire-eaters, trapeze shows and clowns of course. Nothing fantastic. Seriously, if you've seen one circus act, you've pretty much seen them all. The only interesting bit was the lions. At least their fierce roars and dangerous looks could cause even my heart to beat faster as the idiots performing with them whipped and did other borderline abusive things to them and then stuck their heads in the lions' mouths. If I even tried something like that with Shamisen, I'd be nothing but a huge mess of scabs the next day.

Haruhi on the other hand had found it all very exciting. "That was pretty cool. It was my first time in a circus."

Well, I guess that explains why she found it so interesting. I doubt she would have enjoyed it that much if she'd seen circus acts before like I had. This girl gets bored of things even easier than I do usually.

Then again, she had spent quite a lot of time poking me and asking me questions about the acts, so I guess if the acts themselves weren't interesting enough, she had certainly kept her interest up by using me as an information terminal. Not that I had been much help, but she seemed to think of me as an expert on the matter after I had mentioned having seen a few circus acts before the show had started. Sigh. Why couldn't she have bothered Koizumi with all those incessant questions? I bet he could have given complete historical lectures on sword tricks and feline genealogy while all my answers had pretty much gone like this: "I think the knives are weighted to help in the throwing", "No, I have no idea if the lion's claws have been filed down or not" and "How should I know if the clowns' feet really are that big, although I sincerely doubt it".

Maybe this was my punishment for spilling the ice cream on her? Nah, this is just typical Haruhi rudeness. She probably forgot about the whole thing already. She's just so excited right now to keep little details like punishing me in mind.

As we were leaving the large tent, with our Commander leading the way out while talking excitedly with both Koizumi and Asahina-san, I decided to take the opportunity to go to the toilets. After notifying our leader of my intents and receiving her approval (hey, I don't want to get punished!), I started heading for the toilets, following some signs. But before I had taken even more than three steps, I felt a slight tug on the back of my shirt. I didn't even have to turn around to know who it was giving me that gentle little tug anymore.

"What is it, Nagato? I really have to go to the toilet," I said without turning, pointing at the signs.

"…Wait," Nagato said quietly.

"For what?"

She didn't say anything after that, so I turned around and gave the little girl an inquisitive look. She was still holding on to my shirt, but when I turned around to look at her, she met my look with her normal poker face.

"Seriously, I really need to go."

"…"

"What? What is it? Is something strange going on? Something dangerous?"

"You may proceed now." Nagato then let go of my shirt and walked over to the others very nonchalantly.

Ok, what was that? Suddenly I don't feel like going to pee anymore. I feel very hesitant… Screw it, my bladder's gonna explode!

So I ran to the washroom, a surprisingly sturdy looking structure with what appeared to be functioning plumbing for something that had supposedly appeared along with the carnival in a blink of the eye. I did however keep a keen eye on the crowds, but nothing suspicious caught my eyes as I whizzed into the bathroom (where I'd do some different whizzing). Just my paranoid mind working again I guess, although a few follow up questions probably wouldn't hurt.

When I emerged from the washroom, foolishly zipping up in public, having forgotten to do so earlier, I ran into a fellow school mate: Tsuruya-san, probably the only person I knew who could go toe to toe with Haruhi in unrelenting, insane, zestful energy.

"How's it hanging, Kyon-kun?" she asked, stifling a giggle. The pink cotton candy she was holding almost fell out of her hands as she shook like a leaf, trying to stop the explosion of laughter she was undoubtedly trying to keep in check. For my sake, I hope. I really don't need more attention on my crotch at the moment.

"Fine, just fine." Thanks for noticing. Really, thanks.

"Here alone?" Tsuruya-san asked, twirling the cotton candy at the carnival at large.

"No, the whole SOS-Brigade is here."

"Really? That's cool! Shame I can't join you guys at the moment, but my family's all here and we've decided to make a day of it together. But maybe we'll meet again later! See ya!" Tsuruya-san said with a wink and a blown kiss my way as she skipped away.

Well, that was friendly, really friendly.

It amazes me that Haruhi hasn't made her a proper member of the Brigade already. Hmm, maybe Haruhi would feel her position threatened by such a similar presence as herself in the club. Sure, there might be other ways to explain this away, but I just don't really buy them. Tsuruy-san may say stuff like how she likes to watch rather than join in but that just seems hard to believe any more… Maybe I've just spent too much time with Haruhi, resulting in my views becoming a little distorted. In any case, I don't think the clubroom could sustain both of their strange personalities for very long anyway. More importantly, I don't think I could handle them both at the same time.

As I waded through the crowds towards the others, I bumped into Koizumi, carrying snacks and drinks. Apparently he'd been sent on errands while I was unavailable.

"What took you so long?" He asked casually as we continued walking.

"You know, lines, and I ran into Tsuruya-san," I answered him, and for some bizarre reason decided to add, "Another cutie we happen to know."

This one needless line apparently sparked something in Koizumi's mind. "Ah… hmmm… another fair damsel of yours."

I could only manage to raise an eyebrow in response to such an odd thing to say, but I rallied valiantly and succeeded in following the act with a word: "Huh?" Well, sort of.

"Oh, just remarking on the amount of visibly attractive females we seem to be surrounded by."

You got that right. It's odd how we're surrounded by so many cute girls, really. I mean, just think about it. Practically all the girls I have had the luck to merely exchange words with during my time in this school could all have made the cover of a magazine with ease.

"And you think this is merely coincidence, that you are surrounded by what you deem as beautiful in this world?"

What do you mean? Of course it's a freaking coincidence. I am incredibly lucky. And so are you… I guess.

"That or your happiness is a very important desire for someone." Koizumi gave me a conspiratorial wink.

Just what are you talking about?

"You must admit that your life has taken many favourable turns after coming to this school and joining Suzumiya-san's SOS-Brigade. And I'm not merely talking about all the exciting adventures. Three girls, all equally aesthetically appealing as they are different in personality, each one of them sharing an almost intimate relationship with you. And one of them actually appears to personify the pure, unadulterated, imaginative, naïve drive for excitement and adventure most of us have given up by now at this level of maturity, filling our lives with excitement and wonder. A truly wondrous find. Highly unlikely. Almost like a typical boy's dream…" Koizumi then stared up at the sky with an almost yearning look in his eyes.

Seriously, what are you getting at?

"Perhaps we shall discuss this later, for it appears that presently one of these special ladies is demanding our presence. And we wouldn't want to disappoint her, now would we?" Koizumi gave me a wink and a sneaky smile before nudging his head at Haruhi, who was jumping up and down, waving at us frantically.

"Oi! What took you guys so long?" Haruhi shouted at us as we approached her.

We were away for a couple of minutes so don't get so testy. Or did we somehow stumble into a time distorting bubble or something?

"My apologies, but you wouldn't believe those lines," Koizumi answered politely, adopting his usual nice guy smile after the rather enigmatic expressions he had been giving me only seconds ago.

"Never mind. I want to go on the rides. They look like a lot of fun," Haruhi said, switching far too easily from irritation to eagerness. She grabbed a soda from Koizumi, gave a long, hard suck on the straw, loudly draining it of its contents and then threw it away carelessly, only to have it land in a trash can. Wow. And without waiting for anyone else's reply or possible objection, she walked off, not even taking the time to see if everybody was following her. But then again, why would she need to? Of course we'll follow her, it's gotten that bad… No. it's always been that bad, hasn't it?

Nagato and Asahina-san took their respective treats from Koizumi and silently trailed after Haruhi.

"Popcorn?" Koizumi offered me some politely.

"Sure," I said, careful to only quickly dip my hand into the container, lest I be suckered into carrying it and I had received too much treatment like that from Haruhi today to last me for a good while. We then proceeded to follow the girls.

"Hmm, I wonder if there is enough carnival festivities around here to keep Suzumiya-san entertained. It feels like we will shortly run out of attractions to visit at the rate we're going," Koizumi mused, starting up an apparently innocent topic.

"Yeah, I guess." I took another small grab at some popcorn. Mmm, salty. "Think that'll become a problem? She'll get bored and… do something about it?"

"That is certainly a possibility."

"So what, we gotta make sure she keeps entertained? How should we do that? Try to slow her down? Be my guest." Seriously, step up man, give me a break, I deserve it. And a prize, a really big honking prize.

"I'm sure a possibility will present itself to us in such an interesting setting as this, but of course it would be best to have a contingency plan. I'm certain you can think of something to entertain her."

"Me? Why me? You're the one always coming up with things to keep her entertained, like fake murders and such."

"True, but these were hardly spontaneous thoughts. All of those plans took several days, if not weeks, to complete to a satisfactory degree. I think you would be far better suited to thinking of something stimulating for her in such a limited time as this. She values your thoughts highly, after all. Remember how she wanted to build your character the most? Or when she made you choose an ice cream for her as well. Almost like she wanted you to take some more initiative in your relationship with her."

You're reading way too much into the craziness that is solely known as Haruhi.

"Perhaps she is starting to get tired of merely ordering you about. Maybe she wants a more… equal counterpart. Someone with a similar drive and boldness as she herself has. Your apparent passiveness might seem rather unpleasing to her."

"Passiveness? I'm the only one putting up any sort of resistance to her behaviour."

"Yes, but I think she might have started to think you're not doing enough resisting. To be perfectly honest, you could try a lot harder… but not too hard of course. We don't want to aggravate her."

Sigh. "Where's a slider when you need one? One of those could probably keep her entertained… Geez, just where is that slider guy anyway? Why hasn't one of those showed up yet? She did ask for one of them, didn't she?"

Koizumi gave me a funny look.

"What?" I asked apprehensively. Seriously, Koizumi had one of the weirdest looks on his face I had ever seen. I'm not sure whether he was attempting to hold back a riotous laugh or just feeling constipated. Maybe it was just my imagination… Yeah, it probably was just that. Cool, collected Koizumi couldn't be seen making faces like that in public, no matter how much I wanted to see him make a fool of himself in front of people.

"Are you being serious? This isn't a joke?" Koizumi asked me, sounding surprisingly incredulous, smiling a little as if I had actually made a one.

"No, of course not."

"I was under the impression that a slider is someone who goes to alternate realities."

"You'd be correct." Gimme some more popcorn… huh, these ones have butter on them, really sloppy and uneven work…

"Funny, as far as I know, there's only one person in our group who found himself in an alternate reality."

I think I get what you're getting at (talking about Nagatos' realm), but you're way off base here.

"You were there as well," I said, clearly refuting his stupid idea.

"Not my current consciousness, judging by what you told me. So in effect, only you travelled to an alternate reality."

This was getting annoying

"That was an alternate timeline, completely different." I think I've had enough popcorn.

"Really? I see no difference at all, none whatsoever. It's all an alternative reality in any case, by definition," Koizumi said, smiling with an almost fiendish glee in his eyes.

……Shut up. I really don't appreciate humour like this.