Hmm, so I wasn't planning on doing Arnold's POV in this story… But after much deliberation, I decided that if I did, it would probably help the story move along much better… This is going to be a really hard story for me to write, so be nice to me! Here is chapter two, hope you enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own any Hey Arnold!

[Chapter 2: Beautiful freak]

I arrived at the boarding house after dropping Helga off at her home, I had to admit… I'd been pretty worried about her lately, and I knew for a fact that I wasn't the only one. I remember earlier this week, Phoebe had cornered me in the hallway, asking all these weird questions that I didn't know the answers to. I was surprised that Phoebe of all people didn't know what was going on with our dear friend, if Helga wouldn't even tell Phoebe, then it must have been bad… very bad… I wanted to find out what was going on with her, I cared so much for this girl and I had no idea why…. All I knew was that I needed to protect her from any harm; but Helga needed to be handled in a very delicate manner, or she would explode, or shut down…. She was a like a ticking time bomb, just waiting for the second she could blow. Even Gerald had been asking about her, and everyone knew that Helga wasn't Gerald's favorite person in the world. I guess he held a sort of animosity towards her for the way she treated us as kids… Talk about holding a grudge… But Gerald was mostly talk, and I'm sure he had a sort of caring for Helga… After all, we had all been friends since the fourth grade.

"Hey mom, I'm home" I said as I walked through the living room. My mother was sitting on the couch in her PJ's, reading a book in the lamplight. She looked up at me and gave me a warm smile, I knew she could see the worry in my eyes, she could feel the concern eating at me, and well she was my mom after all. "What's wrong, Arnold?" she asked and patted the seat next to her; I reluctantly sat down, focusing my gaze on the coffee table, I stayed quiet, deep in my thoughts. Mom put her arm around my shoulder and pulled me close, even though I was definitely larger than her, I felt safe in her arms. "Is it Helga?" she asked knowingly, all I could do was nod and she gave a deep sigh. "I'm worried about her too…. But all we can do is be there for her, and encourage her to talk to someone… She'll come around eventually" she said softly and placed her cheek on the top of my head, sliding her fingers through my hair. I looked up at her with worry on my face "I just wish I knew what was wrong with her…. Then maybe I could try and help…." I remembered back on the nights earlier events. Although she did look lovely as usual… She looked sick… Her skin was pasty and gray, her hair was dull, and her eyes lacked that burning fire that I so admired. She had bags under her eyes, as if she hadn't slept in weeks… "Arnold, whatever you do, just let it be known that we are here for her and that we love her" My mom said to me and I froze.

'Love' what was even the meaning of that word? I had no idea…

"I think I'm going to go to bed, mom…" I said awkwardly and kissed my mom on the cheek, and excused myself to my room. I lay in my bed, staring up at the stars through my skylight; sleep would not come to me… It would not will it… The anxiety I was feeling over so many things prevented even the slightest doze… I rolled over on my side, chewing on my lip, thinking about how everyone always told me how great it was that I was always looking on the bright side of things. How positive and happy I was, how even in the most horrible of situations I always kept a calm head… It was true, yes… But what they didn't know was that just like everyone else, I had my demons…. I had my fare share of problems… I just never chose to voice them… I tried to find healthy outlets for my pain; I dealt with my problems on my own, never trying to push them onto others… Because I was the one everyone came to when they needed help… I couldn't possibly show it when I was in pain. Maybe it was pride, or maybe it was fear, I'm not sure to be quite frank. All I knew was that I had always been able to fix other people's problems… But this was something different… I didn't know how to help Helga… I didn't even know what was going on with her! Sure, I noticed that she had gotten thinner, she wasn't eating… But I thought that it was normal for girls to do those strange diet type things to lose weight… But then again, I could be wrong.

It wasn't till almost four a.m. when my over thinked brain finally decided to shut down in exhaustion and I fell into a deep sleep. If it hadn't been for my mom ripping me out of bed in a frantic state, I would have slept right through my phone's alarm. I started coming to, the sound of my mother calling to me becoming more apparent in my ears. She kept saying over and over again how I was going to be late if I didn't hurry, and the sleep soon wore off and I found myself quickly rummaging around my room for all my things, and getting ready for the day ahead of me. Thank god it was Friday. I ran into the kitchen and grabbed a couple bagels with strawberry cream cheese already thinly spread over them and two 8oz cartons of no fat milk. I kissed my grandparents goodbye and grabbed the keys to the Packard and sped off in a hurry down to Helga's house. By the time I arrived there it was already 7:30, I had hoped she hadn't left without me and to my pleasant surprise she was sitting on the stoop of her house with her face in her hands, waiting for me. I smiled meekly at the skinny blonde, her hair tied up into a very loose ponytail. I honked my horn and she snapped her head up, smiling in relief to see me, I hoped she wasn't under the impression I was going to stand her up. I would never do such a thing.

She grabbed her pink bag and walked towards the Packard, my smile turned to a frown upon notice how red and puffy her eyes were. Had she been crying? Should I even attempt to find out? I wasn't scared of her temper anymore, that was something I had gotten over years ago. I think maybe it was after I realized that when it came to me, she was always bark but no bite, she would threaten and threaten all she wanted to pound me… But she never would. It was cute, but confusing all at the same time… She never thought twice about punching the lights out of anyone else, what made me so different? Was it because of the time she had told me she loved me? Nah, it couldn't be…. We were only nine; nine year olds don't know what love is…. I still don't know what love is… However, I always had an itching curiosity about that night…. Even about my own feelings towards Helga… I definitely needed to sort out my feelings, but right now was just not the time… She was hurting in some way and I needed to help her feel better before even bringing up such touchy subjects to her. I stared at her for a long moment, hoping that maybe she would finally break down in tears and tell me everything. She needed to get whatever was leaching onto her off her chest. She needed to get out all that rage and sadness before she could attempt to get better…. And if she needed me to be her personal punching bag, I would be… I would go to the ends of the earth for this suffering girl, and I couldn't even figure out why.

I could tell she saw the look of concern in my eye, I could tell she wanted to cry. But in her own Helga way, the only way she could cope was to… Well, be mean… And I understood that, and whatever felt more natural to her, I was well prepared to deal with… At least I thought anyway. Her sadness turned into a bit of anger and she glared at me "What?" she growled as if daring me to even ask that question. 'Go ahead, Arnold… Ask me, I dare you…' I could hear her voice in my head, taunting me. I sighed and gave up "Nothing, Helga…." I simply stated and started the engine, the low purr soothing the tension a bit… I drove off.

I glanced over at her now and then; I knew she could feel my gaze wandering her body. I couldn't help my eyes; her image just drew them to her… She was so…. Small, fragile looking, like if I sneezed she would just blow over…. I could crush her body between my fingers… That couldn't be healthy…. Maybe the fact that I never saw her eat was more of a problem than I realized… Then I remembered the bagels and milk I had grabbed. I'd gotten one for me, and one for Helga. I reached down to the center counsel and pulled the paper plate with the bagels on it "Here, Helga, I brought you some breakfast" I said and held it in her direction. The expression on her face turned from void to horror, and her face went pale "I already ate" she said, I could tell she was lying…. She hadn't eaten…. In fact, I'm sure it had been days before she had eaten dinner at my place! It was all starting to come together…. Helga wasn't eating…. She was too thin…. But I had no idea about eating disorders, and stuff like that…. I never knew girls to starve themselves on purpose just to be thin…. But was it even about being skinny? Or was it something deeper? Surely she knew she was skin and bones…. There was almost no fat on her! Any thinner and she would disappear! I couldn't believe that I hadn't caught on sooner…. "Oh, what did you have?" I asked slyly, trying to make it seem that I only asked out of small talk and curiosity and not because I was catching onto her secret. She struggled a bit to come up with a lie "Eggs…..and"

"And?"

"And…oatmeal….um"

"Sounds good, did you have anything else?"

"Toast…. Orange juice…."

I knew she was lying, she was lying so bad and I didn't know what the fuck to do! I was becoming annoyed, but somehow I knew she couldn't help it…. Something inside her was controlling her, and I was going to find out what it was if it killed me. "Im sure a few bites wont hurt you…. My mom made them especially for us" I was going to get her to take at least one bite. "Get off it, football head! I'm not hungry!" she was growing impatient with me, but so was I, and I didn't care how angry she got. She needed some kind of food in her. "Come on, Helga! Take a bite!" I said and shoved the bagel in her face, when she slapped it away I swerved onto the other side of the road, almost losing control of the wheel, but I quickly regained. "Good going, football head! Way to get us killed!" she yelled in rage. "Just eat the fucking bagel, Helga…" I demanded, and she took it from my hand "Fine!" she said and took a bite "Happy?" I nodded in approval. She was about to set it down, but instead devoured the whole thing in a couple of bites and grabbed the carton of milk, chugging it down. I was surprised by her behavior… I perked an eyebrow, looking at her awestruck for a moment. She was like a rabid dog that hadn't eaten in weeks… It was…. Sad to see her like that… I could tell she felt embarrassed and ashamed at her behavior because she quickly turned her gaze out the window and didn't speak another word till we arrived at school. "Thanks for the ride" she said and quickly ran out of the car before I could say anything to her. "Helga…." I murmured as I turned off the car and stepped out.

When I arrived at my locker I noticed Phoebe and Gerald making out in the hall, when they came up for air they noticed me and walked over. They greeted me happily and I flashed a weak smile "Hey man, are you alright?" Gerald asked me, a little concerned at the look on my face. I sighed deeply but gave a small nod "Yeah, I'm okay" I said as I stuffed my backpack into my locker. "Where is Helga? I thought she was getting a ride from you today?" Phoebe inquired quizzically "Well, she did… But she ran out of the car in a hurry and I have no idea where she went…" I said confused, in that moment we turned to see Helga walk out of the girls lavatory. She seemed to be off in another world, she looked weak and her skin looked grayer than earlier, and her eyes were redder and puffier. She walked over to us and leaned up against the lockers. "Hey Pheobs… Tall hair boy" she said as if nothing was wrong. She turned to me "Um…. Sorry about that little performance earlier…" she said nervously and I smiled humbly "Don't be… it was nothing" I replied, my green eyes piercing her blues. "What performance?" Gerald asked confused. We both just shook our heads "Nothing" we seemed to chime in unison. Gerald and Phoebe looked over at each other with an eyebrow raised, I'm sure they were a little upset that we wouldn't tell them of all people what was going on with us. "Walk me to class, Helga?" Phoebe asked with a slight worry in her voice and Helga nodded reluctantly. Phoebe kissed Gerald goodbye and I watched as the two girls disappeared in the hallway. "Mmm, mmm, mmm… That Helga Pataki sure is looking bad these days…." Gerald said and crossed his arms, leaning up against my locker.

"Gerald…. I'm getting kind of worried about her…" I finally forced myself to say. I knew that whatever Helga was going through I wouldn't be able to deal with on my own… If I was going to help her, I would need help for myself…. She needed strong support, and I knew my family and our friends could be just that. "What do you mean?" Gerald asked seriously, his eyebrows furrowed. I sighed "Well… there is something really wrong with her… and she won't tell anyone…. Maybe you can get some information from Phoebe…" I pondered. Gerald nodded in compliance "Alright, man… I'll find out what I can…. But we can't help her if she doesn't want the help…. Just sayin…" Gerald informed me of things I already knew, but I knew he just wanted to help. "I know, Gerald… But we gotta try…."

"Well, you can count me in, my man"

"Thanks…."

"But what about you, Arnold?" Gerald asked me, concern growing in his eyes…. I raised an eyebrow "What do you mean?" I asked genuinely confused. Gerald could always see things in me that I couldn't even see in myself… He knew me better than I knew me, and he was usually the one to inform me of my own feelings before I even felt them. It always ended in my denying his allegations, only to find out at a later time that he was completely right about everything, forcing me to admit that he was right, ending up in a series of 'I told you so's.' There was a silence that washed over us, we just stared at each other waiting for someone to say something and finally he cracked. "Man, you are so dense…." His comment irritated me slightly. "Get on with it, Gerald" I tested, and he shook his head. "Man, you're always so wrapped up in other people's problems that you never deal with your own…. You bottle it all up and pretend it doesn't exist, when in reality your problems are just as bad as everyone else's" Gerald stated, and I had to admit, I had no idea what he was talking about. However, the thing about Gerald was that he would drop me hints as to what was going wrong in my life and lead me to my conclusions on my own, he would never just flat out come out and say it… That was why he was my best friend. "Nothing, man…. How are your grandparents these days?" he asked randomly, causing me to think, was this maybe one of those hints? My grandparents were growing sicker every day, and as much as I denied it…. I knew they were going to pass soon…. I didn't want to deal with this now though! Not while I still had them! I didn't want to think about losing the two old kooks that had raised me my entire life…. I just couldn't think about it… not now….

"They're fine, Gerald… Why do you ask?" I dared him to press on the subject, but he just shook his head and shrugged his shoulder. "No reason… Just asking" he said nonchalantly and walked off as the bell rang, leaving me in my thoughts…The more I thought about it…. The more it started to worry me... What would I do once they finally checked out? I was so used to having them in my life…. I couldn't bear the thought of them…. Aw shit, I'll just say it! I didn't want them to die! Now that it was in my brain, I kept coming up with scenario's in my head… Their funerals… The sadness in my parent's eyes…. My heart shattering into a million pieces… Would I shut down? Would I be able to look on the bright side? Would I be angry? Even just the mere thought of me not being able to predict my own actions of the future scared the daylights out of me…. I had to shake the thoughts from my mind, because I could feel myself starting to panic… I needed to get to class ASAP.

The day dragged on, every Friday was the same… In most of my classes we just watched films, or had a free day, which was always really cool. However, my head was far from easy… My thoughts raced in cycles…. They constantly were jumping back and forth from my predicament with Helga, to the situation with my grandparents… I was growing weary, and I wanted to hide behind a wall and not let anyone in like Helga always did… But I needed to stay strong… I needed to stay strong for her and for myself… If I shut down, then no one would get anywhere…. I needed to organize my thoughts…. Come up with a plan….

Jesus….

How did I possibly get tangled up in all this shit?

Alright, the story is finally starting to come together in my mind… I was originally going to focus all the drama around Helga's ED, but I want the other characters to have big parts in this story too…. Have them all dealing with secrets of their own… So I think I'll also be doing a POV for Gerald and Phoebe too. I think I might have a clue as to where I'm going to take this story, fun times a head!

Oh, also… On another note… For those who aren't really familiar with EDs… It takes kind of a while before people become as severe as Helga is right now… I started the story already about middle ED for Helga…. So she's already pretty sick… But not so severe that she needs to be hospitalized…. Yet…. I may throw in her recovery soon…. But the thing about EDs is that most young women usually relapse…. Just on a side note...

ALSO! I just really have to add this…. For anyone who is reading this story and may be suffering from an ED… Or if you know someone who may be suffering from one…. Really consider getting them help, or getting help for yourself… EDs are a serious mental illness, and just like any other, you NEED help in order to get it under control…. You CAN NOT do it alone! Trust me!

Ps. don't judge Arnold too harshly on the way he's trying to deal with Helga…. Because it's not easy when someone you care about is killing themselves slowly… most people who have a loved one suffering from anorexia or bulimia don't know how to handle it, it's very frustrating, and very saddening to know someone is doing this to themselves and not really be able to do anything about it…. So don't freak out if now and then he gets forceful…. Like the instance with the bagel… Just sayin…

Anyway, I didn't think this story would get this many reviews already! And such good ones at that! I thought I would be maimed for writing something like this, but no! I'm so happy you guys like this story! Especially because it hits so close to home for me… I really appreciate all the kind words

Love, love, love and more love!

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