Chapter Two: Can Anybody See Me?
When I woke up, there was nothing but noise.
It was in my ears, the ringing, the shouting. It spread like wildfire to my skin, seeping inside my pores. The burning hot noise was everywhere in a few moments. The laughter, the shrieks, the screams, the sound of people, it was all around me. The noise pressed down on me like children looking at animals in the zoo, trying to hard to get past the glass barrier.
I could feel the pressure building as the wall that kept me safe from all the noise began to chip away. I felt like screaming, like crying, like making any noise to join the hoard that was all around, but I couldn't speak again. There was no light to help me see where this noise was coming from. It was all so painfully dark.
The inky blackness surrounded me as well, making hiding places for the shadows of noise. It was infinite, and it wouldn't go away. I wanted to reach my hand out, to touch the darkness and rip away at it until I found some light again, but my hand was frozen at my side.
I wondered where I was, but I did not have time to think as the noise grew louder and louder. The darkness stirred, like a strong wind was blowing it from all directions. Slowly, my vision blurred, pushing the black cloud away. Colors bled in from the edges of my line of sight, reminding me that I was real, and that something wrong had happened.
My head pounded like a hammer on metal as I felt the ground beneath me become corporeal. My hands felt sticky with what I guessed was blood. I wondered where I was, and how I got there. The noise was dying down to a low buzz, allowing me to collect my thoughts. I winced and dug my nails into my scalp as I heard a far-off screaming. It was faint and terrified. It was mine.
With a jolt, my eyes snapped open and I felt flat on my face. I didn't notice that my eyes were closed until I saw the sun. It was bright and as yellow as ever. Wherever I was, at least there was sunshine. I sat up on my knees again, rubbing my head and looking over my shoulder.
I was right in saying I was surrounded by people. The crowd that loitered me was loud and bustling, the sound now crystal-clear in my ears. The screaming had stopped. I cocked my head to the side and observed as they went about their lives, seemingly oblivious to the woman that knelt in the center of the square with sticky blood on her hands.
Remembering the sensation, I looked down. I was right in saying my hands were bloody, but it was where it was coming from that scared me. I didn't feel a thing as my hands reached to my abdomen. I felt a wave of nausea pass over me as I realized the foreign object imbedded there was a shard of glass. I couldn't tell how long it was, but instead of waiting, I immediately grabbed on to the end and yanked it out. The sound I made was not human as I raised the shard to the line of sight. I don't know why I couldn't feel an ounce of pain. I blamed it on shock.
I turned the glass to the side and inspected the edge. Deadly sharp, but slightly corroded. In the back of my mind, I heard the sound of a breaking windshield wiper. Reality hit me with a force so strong it knocked be back on my hands. The piece of glass sent flying a few feet in front of me. I had crashed my car. I had crashed my car and now I was going to die.
I looked at the people around me. They looked back, but didn't seem to see me. Their gaze was so odd that I barely noticed their torn clothes made from a fabric I didn't think existed anymore. It took a moment to really look at them, to see the dirt on their faces and the outfits they were wearing. They looked like peasants out of a high fantasy.
One little boy with sandy hair and sad eyes led a goat with a brass bell around its neck through the crowd of people. Being a city girl, I had never even seen a goat, unless it was behind a television screen. I cocked my head to the side, forgetting my profusely bleeding torso for a moment as I gawked at the strange mixture of sights as smells.
I stood up on shaking legs, placing my hands on my knees for balance. I flipped my hair out of my eyes and spun around slowly, picking out a face in the crowd. Slowly, I inched my way towards an older-looking woman. She reminded me of my mother with her icy eyes and stony glare. It was oddly comforting to see something so familiar. It was almost out of place.
"Excuse me?" I asked, barely registering the crack in my voice. The woman didn't look at me. I shook my head and rolled my eyes, assuming I hadn't said it loud enough. "Excuse me?!" I said again. I could hear myself above the deafening din now. Either she was hearing impaired or I was crazy.
On a whim, I reached out and touched her shoulder in an attempt to gain her attention. I wish I hadn't.
I am usually sensitive to touching other people, as I disliked it greatly myself, but I was not prepared for my hand to literally go through her shoulder. My eyes widened and bulged out as I staggered back. I didn't know what was going on, but if I had been corporeal, I would have bumped into a gruff-looking man with dirty brown hair. Instead, I went right though his torso. I landed hard on the ground, but didn't feel any pain shoot up my spine.
My mouth hung open as the man put his arm around the woman's shoulder. They disappeared into the crowd together just like that, as if I had never been there. I stared after them for as long as I could, then quickly got to my feet. Blood was flowing freely from the torso, staining my tank top and polka-dot pajama bottoms. I didn't even notice now.
"Hello?" I croaked. I heard my voice crack again. I raised a hand to my throat and grimaced as I pulled tiny shards of glass from the skin there. Tears filled my eyes as I looked from villager to villager, hoping to get a nod, a wink, even a look of horror. Anything was better than the silence.
I paused a beat as nobody seemed to register that I had even spoken.
"Hello!" I shouted this time, as loud as I could go without crying. I felt another wave of nausea pass through my stomach, gripping my chest with its icy fear as not a single person turned their head.
I spotted a cart selling mirrors and I moved towards it, dodging the people coming my way out of habit. I reached the stall and chose a mirror. I stared into the glass and my mouth fell open. At least, I thought it did, I couldn't see it. I couldn't see anything. Even the mirror didn't know I was there. I whipped around and collided headlong with another person, yet another man.
His eyes stared at the spot I was in before I fell. There was confusion present as he turned to the lady beside him.
"Did you feel that?" He asked her. She stared at the mirror, shaking her head slowly, never breaking eye contact with her own reflection. It looked as though she wasn't listening to him, and yet still he spoke. "There was a chill in the air, just now. I suppose winter really is on the wing." The woman nodded absently and allowed the man to lead her away from the mirrors.
I pulled myself up for what felt like the hundredth time and tugged my knees up to my chest. I latched my hands around them and tilted my head up towards the sky. The sun was comforting to look at, but it didn't warm my face like it usually would have. I lowered my eyes slightly, catching sight of a great building in the distance. A castle.
It was a beautiful thing to see, with its bright red flags and turrets that were so tall that they could have touched the clouds. The stone that made the walls was smooth and well kept, like it was ripped right off a page out of a picture book. I found myself entirely mesmerized with it, I longed to be closer. I stood again, abandoning my confusion and self-pity as the sun grew almost brighter.
I let a small smile work its way onto my now tear-streaked face as I took a few steps towards the castle. I felt like I was being pulled forward by my own curiosity, my own longing to see something entirely out of the ordinary. My mouth fell open just slightly as my mind flashed to my room and the bookshelf that stood in the corner.
I let myself remember a simpler time, sitting by the window, reading a book with a red cover. In that book, there was a castle, and I was sure I was seeing it then.
I didn't bother to dodge the people around me as they hurried through the streets. I didn't know what had happened to me, but I found I didn't care. My eyes never left the sight as I maneuvered through the crowd, leaving shivering commoners in my wake.
Among the hoard, I spotted a man of around my age walking towards me. His eyes were cast slightly downwards, a blue scarf tied around his neck. I resisted the urge to smile at him as he looked up, his eyes meeting mine for a moment.
He's kind of cute. I thought to myself. He was close now, any minute and I would walk into him. I found myself wishing I could say hello, that I could at least talk to him. He was the first person I had seen who looked remotely in my age group. I sighed and continued walking.
Just before we made impact, something in his expression changed. Before, it was confusion, the kind you see when you meet a new person. A few seconds after though, his eyes moved to my bleeding torso, and he gave me a look of horror.
I was jarred out of my foggy state when I hit him square in the chest, making me fall yet again. I caught myself with my elbows, looking up at the man with terrified eyes. He looked just as frightened.
"What?" I asked quietly, staring at the dark-haired guy. He stared right back before breaking his gaze to look around at the crowd shuffling around him. Some elbowed him, telling him to move but he didn't. In one quick motion, he was on his knees beside me, his eyes taking in all the blood and broken glass.
"Y-you..." He trailed off. He seemed very distressed by the looks the villagers were now giving him. He looked like he'd gone mad to them. He swallowed, looking as though he were going to be sick. "You're bleeding." He said softly. almost as if he were in shock. I looked down at torso and nodded.
"It seems I am." I replied. He turned away for a moment and then looked back to me, keeping his line of sight only on my face. The poor boy had gone paler than before.
"Alright." He said, smiling a little bit. I was confused. "Who put you up to this?" He asked. I began to shake my head, but he stood up. "Was it Arthur?" The villagers were staring now. Some of them had stopped. "Yes, because a bleeding girl is so very funny!" He was louder now. I shook my head, attempting to stand up.
"No." I said when I got to my feet but the man shook his head.
"Don't even bother, I honestly don't care who. I found you out. Just go back to wherever you came from." He started to walk away. I felt a sudden urge to touch him again. It felt unreal how much it hurt to suddenly lose the only person who could see me. He turned back for a moment, as if to add an afterthought. "And tell whoever sent you that their sense of humor is incredibly twisted." My mouth fell open, but no sound came out.
"Wait!" I shouted, running after him. He had long strides, I had to give him that.
"The villagers were a nice touch." He said with a laugh. "I mean, making me feel like I'm crazy. It's all so hilarious." I could hear it. The bitter and sarcastic bite to his voice. He sounded angry. It must not have been the first time someone had played a practical joke on him.
"B-but-" He cut me off, finally looking back and making eye contact.
"Of course, I have to applaud your acting skills." He sounded so malicious, it honestly didn't suit him a bit. He glared at me for a second longer before a tall man wearing a brown hat pushed though the crowd, moving the gangly man out of the way and walking right through me. In an instant, his expression changed again. Horror was back. I didn't miss it.
"You can see me." I said. It wasn't a question now. I barely recognized my own voice. The man looked around at the oblivious people now casting concerned side-glances at him from the corner of their eyes. I reached down to my stomach, pulling out another shard of glass. I held it out and let it drop to the ground for emphasis.
His eyes widened in shock as his features contorted into that of disgust.
"Help me." I said in a voice just above a whisper. "Help me, please." He nodded.