Chapter 2: Unwanted Memories

"I went to see you, pretending it was coincidence
That fleeting love
You still haven't changed
I want to erase
That shattered kiss when I tried to be an adult, but
I can not, I can not
I gave up"

~Memories by VAMPS~

Heero Yuy was buttoning his white long-sleeved polo uniform in the early morning. It was still early, and the former Gundam pilot still had a lot of time to spend before his morning classes. The television was turned on and was on a news channel just in case she would be featured again.

He ran a hand through his dark brown locks and walked over to the window to pull up the blinds. It was sunny outside, as if the heavy rain from the past few days never came. He stared at the horizon where the early raises of the rising sun hiding behind the tall buildings from his view in his apartment shed light on the houses below. He gave a sigh when a certain memory came to mind.

"Honestly, Heero, are you really human? Or an immortal vampire?" teased the Vice Minister as she crossed the room from the door to the glass door that leads to the balcony. She pulled a string at the side to let the curtains separate from the center and allowed the sunlight to fill in the room. "There, that should do it."

"I prefer the former," replied her boyfriend who was typing on his laptop as usual at the edge of the bed.

"Really?" Relena walked over to the bed and came up behind Heero. She wrapped her arms around his waist and placed her chin on his shoulder, trying to peek at whatever he was typing. "Survived gunshot wounds, tended to his own broken leg, survived when his Gundam exploded, survived after jumping from a fifty plus feet cliff, loves working in the dark, that and many other things, yeah right."

"I'm used to the dark," said Heero, briefly glancing at Relena before returning back to his work.

"I kind of figured. Ever since you were little?"

He nodded. "In the lab of Doctor J when I was being trained, it was always dark. There were no windows there, no sunlight, too."

"Oh." Again, Relena was regretful for even letting Heero remember the memories of his ill-fated childhood. A child. He was a child who never got to appreciate the sheer beauty of the sunrise nor the sunset. He was a child who had been exposed to war, violence, death, and weapons at an early age. It shouldn't be. He shouldn't have. How could fate be this cruel?

Heero must have felt Relena's discomfort as she unknowingly tightened her embrace, leaned her forehead on his shoulder, and went silent. Wanting to ease her of discomfort, he stopped typing and placed his hands on top of hers that was on his stomach. "It's alright. Even if I wasn't trained, I still wouldn't have any place to go to. I would have even locked myself up somewhere or even in the slums."

Relena only nodded, she knew that it was Heero's way of comforting her, even though it should be the other way around. It was she who brought up the subject. She unwrapped herself from Heero's embrace and planted her feet on the floor to close the curtains. Before she could get up from the bed, Heero's hand grabbed her arm, making her turn to face him.

"Don't. Just stay here," he almost pleaded, his eyes displaying something that Relena rarely saw from him. His eyes seemed to be... lost, as if it belonged to a child who had been abandoned by his mother.

"I'm sorry, Heero." She sat back down on the edge of the bed beside him, avoiding his gaze.

She was apologizing. For what? All she ever did was forgive him and accept him for who he was. He was an assassin, who threatened to kill her, who pointed a gun at her not just once, and who he tried to hit with his Gundam shield. He could have been the one who would send her to her grave in the midst of the brutality of the war. But she forgave him after all that. Moreover, she loved him. It was more than he could ever ask for. She gave him a new direction in life. She gave him something new to protect, she gave him a reason for living. She had shown him the beauty of a bloodless world. What's there to be sorry about?

His thoughts were interrupted when Relena turned to him. "You know what? I take back what I said about you being a human or an immortal vampire."

"What am I then?" asked Heero, lifting his eyebrow in question.

"You're an angel. My angel." Relena chuckled, slightly ashamed of her words. "You see, your timing when I met you was just appropriate. When father was killed, I'm glad I already met you. You gave me strength during one of the most difficult times of my life. And even during the war, you kept me going. Your strength, your kindness, your motivation – I was inspired by it all. Knowing that you're fighting with all you can in the battlefield that in order to bring peace inspired me to also fight for peace in the only way I know how." She paused. "I'm sorry, I don't think I'm making any sense. But I just want you to know that you're the light of my life."

She bit her lip, waiting for Heero's reaction. Did she just admit all of that?

So honest. She just had to be so honest about her feelings. It really doesn't make sense. I aimed to take your life away before, countless times, thought Heero. At the tender age of eight, he was already firing guns and taking away lives of others. How could he be an angel? How could he be a source of inspiration? What kindness? Just by counting the numbers of the lives he had taken away, he was sure that he could never make it to heaven.

The princess could see him comprehend her words. She knew that he was debating to himself whether he deserved her claims, and she was more than willing to let him know and believe that he was more than just an assassin and Gundam pilot. He was also a normal human being who has the capability to touch the lives of others. She reached for his hands. "Don't be so hard on yourself. I'm assuming that you're thinking about threatening me in the past. Ironically, you're the reason why I'm alive now. You saved me and protected me more times than you tried to... hurt me. For that, I'm thankful. And the fact that you're here with me is more than what I could ever ask for. I love you, Heero."

Too much faith in him. How could someone so pure like her ever trust him with her life? Moreover, love him? He knew he doesn't deserve her, but she's all he's got to keep him going on with life. She made him feel human, not just a weapon. She created a new world for him – a world untainted with blood. He wasn't her angel. It was the other way around. She was his angel. She was his savior.

Overwhelmed by her words of affection, his voice was caught in his throat. Too much to say, he thought. So the former Gundam pilot only responded to the only thing that made sense in his mind. He gently grabbed her by the shoulders and laid her down on the bed, positioning himself on top of her. Relena was about to say something when Heero claimed her mouth with his own. The princess responded to his kiss with equal fervor and wrapped her arms around his neck to pull him closer. Heero broke the kiss and proceeded in kissing her neck.

Relena ran her hand through his dark brown locks, while her other hand caressed his back. "Heero," she whispered.

The sound of her voice that begged for him to touch her, allowed Heero to surrender his rational thinking and only relied in acting on his emotions. Today he will love her, tomorrow, and for eternity he still will. And he will show her that. It's the only thing that made sense for now.

That's when they made love for the first time – during the daytime, when the curtains were opened. Everyday's a new experience for Heero Yuy when he's with Relena Darlian.

Heero shook his head, wanting to stop the memory from continuing further in his mind. Damn it. It didn't take long until he heard the Vice Minister's name being mentioned on the news again. He hurriedly grabbed the remote control to increase the volume of the television just in case it will reveal more details on her visit to L1. His gaze narrowed when the headline briefly mentioned her trip, but was more focused on her love life.

The headline read "Vice Minister Darlian Finds New Love?" and images of Relena eating dinner in a fine dining restaurant with a blonde businessman with green eyes were being flashed on the screen. Next was a footage of Relena being hounded by reporters after a meeting with the delegates, pressing her with information regarding her new-found love, to which she only replied with a smile and denial insisting that they were just friends.

The television was turned off right after Relena denied the rumour. For the past year, Relena had been linked with several young bachelors ranging from businessmen, showbiz personalities, and politicians. Heero wasn't surprised with this since it was expected of someone as beautiful, intelligent, and kind-hearted as Relena to have a line of suitors vying for her affections. And he didn't have a right to object in whatever she chose the moment they broke up. But even when news of her dating someone else came up in the news, he couldn't help but know if the rumours were true. Has she really found someone? Has she found her soulmate? Has she moved on? 'Cause he was sure as hell not over her.

"Helloooo!" a female voice called out.

"What?" Heero snapped back at the source of the voice.

"What do you mean 'what'? We asked you if you'd like to join us for dinner tonight," asked a girl with the same age as him, dressed in a white shirt and shorts. She had long black hair that reached up to her waist and and had blue eyes.

Heero continued to stare at the setting sun as he replied to the girl sitting beside him on the school bench. "I'll pass. I have some things to do."

"What else do you have to do? We don't have homeworks for now. Come on! It's been a while since the track and field club members had this much free time to go out," replied the girl. "It won't take long. You can just show up and satisfy everyone then leave minutes after. Plus, you look distracted lately. You might want to unwind a little."

"I'm not distracted."

"Fine, but please come with us tonight."

"Fine, I'll go," replied Heero.

"Really? Shall we go together then?" offered the girl, her voice rising up with excitement.

"Go ahead. I still have to do something."

"Aw." The girl replied with a frown. She stood up and waved at him before she walked away to the gates. "Alright, but you'll come okay?"

Heero nodded at the girl and slightly waved back before turning back to the setting sun. There were certain times when the Prussian eyed former pilot would just sit on the bench in their school and watch the setting sun. Somehow, Relena was right. The sheer beauty of seeing the mixed hues of purple and orange painted in the big blue sky indicating the peaceful end of the day gave a tranquil feel.

It was nearly evening and there were only a few students left in their school. The cold breeze of the evening was starting to be felt as the wind played with his dark brown hair. For the past year, he was starting to get used to the life of a normal student, only that he still enrolled with the name Heero Yuy despite it being also an alias. Furthermore, figuring that he also needed to get in shape, he joined the track and field club. He was a heartthrob in their college with girls from even outside of their school cheering for him in their competitions. But of course, he turned them down.

He was relieved that no one in their school knew of his history as a Gundam pilot, nor his relationship with Relena. It made his school life much peaceful. Peace.

Again, his mind drifted back to a certain evening.

"If you hadn't stayed and joined the Preventers, what do you think you'd be doing right now?" asked Relena as she and her Preventer boyfriend leaned on the balcony of Heero's room.

"Hn."

"Are you contented with what you're doing right now?"

There was a moment of silence before Heero answered. "Yes." He turned to Relena and saw her deep in thought. "What's wrong?"

The princess turned to Heero and tried to smile. "It's nothing big. Sometimes I'm thinking if I should just quit politics and just attend school to finish a degree without the media covering my activities. Just to study as a normal girl. Haven't you thought about it, too?"

"What?"

"School. I'm guessing that you also did not have a normal type of education," replied Relena.

Of course none of it was normal. During his teens, he did nothing but transfer to different schools. Moreover, he attended the schools not to study but to accomplish a mission. But then again, finally studying in an institution 'normally' wasn't a bad idea.

"I really did not have a normal attendance in school, you know that. But I have to say that in all the schools I attended, my stay in St. Gabriel was the craziest," said Heero. He turned to her smiling a bit.

"And why is that?" she challenged.

"Cause I met their most popular student and got the school attacked with mobile suits," he replied.

"Very funny." Relena playfully hit his arm, wrapping her arms around it afterwards. "But honestly, you want to go to school together someday?"

"That's a good suggestion. That'd be nice," he replied.

Heero got to his feet and walked towards the school's gate. I'm here now, Relena, without you.

"Oh my." Relena gasped in surprise as she entered her house.

Petals of red roses were scattered everywhere in the living room and even on the corridor that led to the kitchen and dining area, as well as the staircase. She didn't bother to turn on the lights since the house was illuminated by colourful candles lit up in the living room. They were scented, filling the room with floral scent.

"Welcome home, sweetheart," said a man with short, blond hair, wearing a blue collared shirt and jeans. He stood up from the sofa and walked over to Relena. He was a bit taller than the princess, and had emerald green eyes that reminded her of Trowa.

"Nathan," she began.

The man removed her coat and kissed her on the cheek. "Have you eaten?"

Relena nodded. "Yes. They served dinner during the meeting. How about you?"

"Already did, too." The man named Nathan gave her a smile, which complemented his handsome face. "You must be tired."

"I am."

Nathan took her hand and led her to the living room. He pressed the 'play' button of the radio when they reached the living room, and a slow song played in the background. He placed his hands on the Vice Minister's waist and pulled her close, closing his eyes.

"Nathan?" Relena was still surprised at what Nathan, her boyfriend, had been doing since she came home. "What's wrong?" Everything seemed unsual. "Roses, candles, what's up?"

"Nothing's wrong," he replied softly. "I just miss you lately. We've both been busy. And then we're both leaving for different colonies tomorrow because of work. I'll miss you even more." He ran his fingers through her long hair.

"I missed you, too." Relena finally understood his sentiments. She wrapped her arms around his neck and leaned on his shoulder. "But it's just for two or three days. We'll see each other again."

"Yeah."

They just stood there swaying to the soft melody, holding each other for who knows how long.

Nathan broke the comfortable silence between them. "It's been a long time since we danced like this, right?"

"Yes," replied Relena, still leaning on his shoulder as she closed her eyes. The stress from work was finally leaving her, and she held on to her lover closer. She was comfortably leaning on his embrace when an unwanted memory crept unto her mind. It was the memory of her dancing with someone else when she was just fifteen years old. For a moment, Relena recalled the memory of how he held her hand and waist, and how everyone looked at them with adoring eyes oblivious to their conversation about him killing her. It was also the night when their school was attacked by mobile suits because of her, but instead of helping the mobile suits end her life, he ended up saving her.

"Heero," whispered Relena softly, snuggling onto her boyfriend's embrace. Realizing what she just said, her eyes shot wide open.

"What was that, Relena?"

They stopped moving.

What have I done? Relena pulled away from Nathan's embrace to look at him in the eyes. "It's nothing. I'm sorry."

"What are you apologizing for? It's alright." The blonde chuckled. "Anyway, since we won't be seeing each other for a few days..." He brought something out of his pocket. "I want to give you something."

In his hand was a black velvet box. He opened the little thing and revealed a ring adorned with little diamonds all around the band.

"Dear god." For the second time that night, Relena gasped in surprise. "Nathan, this is..."

"Marry me, Relena. I know that we've only been together for eight months. But I'm more than willing to stay with you for more years. I love you."

"I..."she paused.

Relena contemplated on the situation. Her faithful boyfriend of eight months just proposed to her. What to say? He was a faithful and responsible man, an attractive one, and he loved her. Every woman in the world who would be proposed by with that kind of lover wouldn't think twice about saying yes. But why was she taking so long? Why was she hesitant? Was it because of the man whose name she suddenly called out earlier?

Stop it, Relena. He hasn't contacted you since he left. He's now living the life he wants now, and God forbid he could also be dating someone else now. Heero's a capable and attractive man, too. Right now, it's Nathan who you have. Love him, focus on him, she said to herself.

The blonde sensed Relena's internal battle with herself, so he took her hand with his, "I know that it's sudden, but I'll give you time." He took the ring from the box and slid the band in her ring finger. "I'll patiently wait for you. Until then, just wear this. If your answer is 'no', then just remove this from your finger. Take this as a sign of my love for you."

Relena stared at the band in her ring finger. "I'm sorry, Nathan. It's just that... I've been busy and marriage is something that I haven't thought of yet."

"It's alright." Nathan embraced her.

Even in the arms of someone who loved her, she still thought of somebody else. How could she deserve him? How could she be this selfish? After he left, she had Nathan who stood by her and selflessly loved her even if she hadn't moved on from her past. Saying yes right now would just be the most appropriate thing to repay him, right?

Relena pulled away and looked at Nathan's emerald green eyes. "It's beautiful, Nathan. Thank you so much."

It's time to move on.

"Nathan, I'm giving you my yes."

"Are you sure?" the blonde smiled, brightly accentuating his charismatic aura. "Did I hear you, right?"

"Yes." Relena nodded. "Yes, I'll marry you."

The blonde could not help himself and leaned down to kiss the Vice Minister before, wrapping his arms around her tightly but gently. "I love you, Relena. I'm the happiest man alive right now."

Relena returned the tight embrace, eyes filling with tears. She did not know if it was because of her being loved unconditionally or the guilt of still thinking about if she had betrayed her ex-lover. She always dreamed of being proposed to. Truth be told, she had always hoped that it was Heeo who would do so. But then again, he left. He made his choice, she agreed to it. It was their fate. So she only replied to the most appropriate words to say at this time. "I love you, too," she whispered.

"You're my soulmate, Relena."

It was when her tears began to fall.

Author's Note: How was it? ^^ Thanks for the reviews so far. I just realized how enthusiastic I am on this story. I originally planned for this to be just 2-3 chapters long, but found that I had more ideas in store for this one.

No Heero x Relena encounter yet for this one. Maybe for the next chapter ^_^ I just want to first establish how they're both doing before they meet again.

Anyhoo, it's been fun writing this one so I hope that you guys also enjoyed this. Until the next chapter! Ja!

Credits: The chapter title and song lyrics were from Japanese rock band VAMPS' latest single Memories/Get Up. ^_^