I was inclined to believe the supernatural experience I had just had while sleeping was completely false. A stray fragment of my imagination left maddeningly prominent during my concious hours.

Or, more simply, a dream.

However, there were a few things that made it almost impossible.

The strange sense of awareness I held throughout the entire experience. How I was able to remember every insignificant detail as if it were my everyday life. Even my most fantastical and memorable dreams had a layer of friction between them and reality. Although I would never be able to identify what it was, something stood prominently in my mind that allowed me to maintain the common sense that "this was obviously a dream, and not real life."

No such thing stood in the way of that experience.

There was no discernable difference between Igor and reality. By itself, these things would not be capable of convincing me, as stated before. My cynical attitude had been forged in the fires of social hell, something so weak should've been ineffective in breaking through my wall of self-denial.

However, looking into the mirror, expecting to see a rotten pair of fish eyes staring back at me, only served to shatter my refusal of reality.

Staring back me from the mirror was, in fact, not the pair of eyes I had grown accustomed to seeing everyday. A mask, all too similar to the blank faces of my "dream" appeared. It was completely empty, and the only distinguishable feature it held, besides being surrounded by an infinite amount of vomit inducing fog, was a pair of lifeless eyes. Black holes that replaced the existence of any pupil.

It was completely indecipherable. I was absolutely sure that I was staring into a mirror, my mirror, in fact. What did this mean about me? Was it like that so called velvet room, did it speak about the disgusting recesses of my mind, the dark reality that even I couldn't face?

Moving my head, I found that, just like a reflection, it moved in tandem with me. Other than it's appearance, it acted as it should, imitating my movements in perfect synergy, despite the fact that there was no torso or anything resembling limbs.

I ignored it.

Despite the fact that I wanted to stand there and stare aimlessly into my own reflection, life wouldn't be waiting for me to understand whatever supernatural event that was currently affecting me.

"Onii-chan!

Oh...you're awake?"

Her timing sure is impeccable. It's a good thing she hadn't walked in on the image of me trying to touch my own face through the mirror.

"Yeah, I am. So hard to believe that you're elder brother could wake himself up for school?" I asked, ignoring the clear look of disbelief on my sister's face.

"You're right, it's extremely hard to believe, but instead of questioning my sanity like any other person would, I'll just trust my amazing brother and go back downstairs.

Oh, I can feel the Komachi points on that one!" She exclaimed, seeming genuinely convinced of her benevolent nature.

"I'm almost one-hundred percent sure that was an insult."

I've always found it kind of strange how entusiastic people were to comment on my way of life. Like, aren't you scared of implanting some sort of inferiority complex and forever ruining my own self-perception? Well I'm me, so I don't really care too much, but what if I was some normal person? Surely they'd have some crippling self-esteem issues.

Ah, whatever.

Morning's sure are monotonous. Even subtracting the feeling of having my own psychological state spiral out of control, it really is tiring to have to get up every single day and do work.

Someone other than me might even find the warming rays of sunlight and the cool breeze against their face somewhat nice and relaxing. I only felt that the sun was mocking me with it's unapologetic rays of optimism. And don't even mention the breeze, moving my stuff around and disrupting my body tempature every single time I started to feel comfortable.

I really do hate spring.

Not to mention I have to continue riding this bike every single goddamn day. I deserve some sort of reward, don't I?

Despite my genuine enthusiasm to berate the irresponsible expectations of spring and it's inconvenient weather, life once again decided that I was going to go work, no matter how much I silently argued. As such, I arrived at school in what felt like record time.

I opened the door to the classroom quickly and silently, before moving to my desk. Stealth Hikki: Secret Attack Defense Mode came in useful again, only moments later I realized that I wasn't actually late, and that Hiratsuka-sensei wouldn't have any reason to violently abuse me.

Of course, it's still a good habit to have. Who knows when that gorilla will find some reason to attack me. It's in her nature, I've come to believe.

Certainly, the inhospitable battleground known lovingly to it's ignorant warriors as the "Classroom" was a place that required a near peak level of environmental awareness in order to safely navigate. I, personally, have seen many an unknowing adolescent ripped apart in the merciless and unforgiving war of youth.

In fact, my cousin's friend's friend had been ridiculed mercilessly after having tripped and fallen over his chair one time. He would never forget that incident, and would go on to tell me how traumatizing it has been for m-him from that point on.

Of course, having learned from that mistake, I would never find myself caught off guard by anyone, or anything(such as a stray chair).

"Hikki!" In a flash of pink hair and a jiggle of something I could never name, a high pitched voice had somehow found it's home next to me. That high-pitched voice, of course, belonged to Yuigahama Yui.

Godamnit woman, have you somehow developed some sort of anti-hikki attack? Has my impenetrable fortress been penetrated? I will have to further research this!

"What do you want?"

Of course, although all alarms are currently active, I have to continue my facade of nonchalance. Or maybe that's just how I normally am? Pfft, who cares?

I would be lying if I said her characteristic pout wasn't cute, though. I mean, not enough to pierce my cyncism defense systems, but we did take quite a hit on our portside.

"Why do you do that everytime?! I just want to talk to you!"

Ok, ok, don't make that face! Didn't your parents tell you that you're supposed to keep the most powerful attacks for last? Come on, that's cheating!

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Now did you need something?"

"Everyone is going out later today, I am too." Yuigahama spoke matter-of-factly.

"I don't particularly see how that has anything to do with me."

"Come on, you know what I meant! Will you please come?"

"N-" As always, my response was going to be a nice, succinct, and indisputable no. But, my thoughts wandered back to this morning. If I was to be left alone, I would run around and tear myself apart. I want to be alone, I want to enjoy sleeping, and I want to be able to read in my room for hours on end.

But, the idea of having to face that mirror. Of having to face whatever was staring back at me, usurping the position of my own face.

That scared me.

Like before, I can run away. I will run away. It's what I've always done, and it's what I'll continue to do.

People like to testify that running from your problems is useless, and ultimately, fruitless.

I disagree.

Perhaps, for a normal person, the stress of that problem would weigh on their mind. They would never see a moment's respite from their troubles. However, for me, I have mastered the art of running away. I can push and ignore whatever ails me. And, even if the inevitable happens and I am forced to face whatever horrors have been festering behind my back, I will still treasure the time I spent doing everything besides that.

That is the character of Hikigaya Hachiman.

"Hellooooo! You there? You just went quite all of a sudden."

"Yeah, I'm fine. And I'll come along with you as well."

"I kno- wait really?" Complete disbelief was obvious in every aspect of her being.

Taking into account this morning and this very incident right now, I certainly have been acting out of character. But then again, it was more like I was forced out of my comfort zone.

"No really, could you repeat that?" She spoke again, this time seemingly more sure that she had hallucinated.

"I said I'm coming. You're being annoying." And she really was. Not that I would want her to stop. It's one of her endearing traits, I'd say.

Even more importantly though, I was almost able to ignore the foreboding sense of dread stewing in my chest after having agreed to go to a social outing. Yuigahama's smile was one of the very few things that could do that to me.

"Thanks, Hikki! This is going to be so fun!" I couldn't help but smirk slightly as she ran away. I might not be naive enough to mistake that genuine smile of happiness for affection, but Yuigahama was a person who made other people happy with her presence. Even a loner such as myself isn't immune.

Of course, like everything else in my life, the happiness doesn't last too long.

"Where the hell is Hikigaya!? Oh wait there he is."

I appreciate that she didn't start throwing punches at the air above my seat, because it really looked like she would for a second.

With Hiratsuka-sensei's entrance, the room entered a soft quiet. However, due to my growing anxiety about my psychological state, I couldn't fall asleep. I used to pride myself on being able to sleep whenever, wherever. In fact, I still pride myself on that. But somehow, every time I close my eyes I see those same pair of eyes. I hear the laughter of that long-nosed fart.

And so, no sleep.

Wait, wait, wait. Our radar has just detected an S-Class monster! All systems red! Sir, the cyncism defense systems are failing! They won't hold on much longer!

"Hachiman! How are you?"

He's blinding me! His light and purity are blinding me!

"I'm fine, thanks."

"Really? You don't look too good. You're pretty pale, are you sure you're okay?"

That tender tone, that look of pure distress and concern!

Men, it's been an honor to serve. I will go down with the ship, you must make your way to the escape pods.

We lost to an admirable foe.

"No, no, I'm fine."

"Oh...okay. If you aren't feeling well, then you have to go the nurse, okay?"

"Yeah, I will. Actually, I'm tagging along with Yuigahama, her and her friends are going out. You wanna come?"

Please say yes, please say yes, please say yes.

"Ummm..."

Hmmm, in what other situation would I be able to imagine a male asking a very feminine looking person to go somewhere with him. Nope, can't think of it. Or rather, I refuse to.

Indeed, Totsuka isn't female! I have no reason for this anxiety in my chest!

"You don't have to come if you don't want to."

"No! I mean, I do want to come, but I have practice today..."

Ah, well. Even being in the presence of an angel for a few more moments was worth it. I was lucky that he would even spend time with a lower life form such as myself, how benevolent.

"It's fine, don't worry about it. We'll just go out together later. Just the two of us. Together."

"That was a very strange way to say it, but you're right! See you later!" He excitedly yelled to me as he made his way out of the classroom.

I feel as if my life has become slightly dimmer now that the light of Totsuka has left me. What do I do with myself? Who am I? What is the meaning of life?

"Hikki!"

And there she is. I'd say right on time, but she never is, is she?

"Yes, I'm going to club. And no, I can't look more excited about it."

"No no, that's not it. Club is cancelled."

"Why is that?" I asked, genuinely confused. Yukino couldn't be having problems with her family again or something right?

"I asked Yukinon to come along with us after you said yes."

I don't see how those two things are related to anything, or how that is an answer to my question.

"I don't see how those two things are related to anything, or how that is an answer to my question."

"Don't worry about it! All that matters is that she's coming too."

Hey, I'm the absolute best at following orders. Especially when the order is "don't worry about it." Not worrying is my specialty.

"Who else is coming, besides the group you hang out with?"

"First of all, I'd appreciate it if you didn't say 'group' with such obvious disgust. Second, Iroha-chan, Saki-chan, and a few other people are coming."

When did she get the time to ask all these people? Furthermore, why did Tatsumaki even say yes? Isn't she a loner like me?

Yuigahama must've seen my confusion.

"Well, Iroha and Saki weren't coming at first, but then I asked you."

"Wouldn't Isshiki come for Hayama anyways?" She was probably looking reluctant to be cute or something.

"Mou, you're so stupid sometimes!"

What, why?

"What, w-"

"Just come on!"

In Appearance, Hikigaya Hachiman's Life Remained the Same