The afternoon wore on. At times Gourry coughed miserably in his sleep, other times he rested quietly. Lina could see he was under siege by the common ailments of those running a high fever. Chills and sweats and muscle aches plagued him. She did her best to alleviate them. It was when she was mopping Gourry's forehead with a damp cloth that she heard the sounds of wooden wheels on marble floors. She stiffened as Gourry stirred, wondering what all of the commotion was. "Lina?" Gourry asked as he struggled to get up.
"Shh," she ordered as she gently pushed him back to bed, her thoughts racing. What better way to overrun a strong kingdom then by unleashing a plague and sending troops in? Quietly she got up and walked to the door. Behind her she heard Gourry draw his sword.
Carefully she opened it, but it was not an invading army she found. It was a series of wagons packed to the brim with ill people. Rudy walked ahead of them, directing the drivers to where they needed to go. Lina folded her arms across her chest. "What's this?" Lina asked Rudy as he was about to pass. Instead he stopped to answer her question.
"Every morning volunteers are sent to gather the sick and bring them here. Used to be several hundred a day would be carted in. But now we're only bringing in twenty to fifty a day." He shook his head mournfully. "There's just not a lot left."
Lina nodded numbly, realizing that now would be a good time to offer help. But she wasn't leaving Gourry. Slowly a wagon passed and Lina felt her heart freeze when she realized that it was full of sick children. She started to shake as her eyes latched on to a small boy coughing so violently that he kept rising from his pallet. As he calmed down he looked at her, his eyes that were a piercing shade of blue were watery and filled with pain. Lina leaned back against the wall for support, feeling winded. He looked like he could have been Gourry's long lost brother, or son even.
Gourry had wanted children so much…
"H-how many of the children have survived?" Lina asked, her voice a hoarse whisper.
"None." Rudy replied. Lina closed her eyes, and it occurred to her that not a single child was accompanied by a parent. Were they in another wagon? Were they dead? Or had these children been abandoned? Grimly, Rudy continued, "Even if humanity survives this plague, I don't know how we'll do in the long term with a whole generation dead. The children are just so vulnerable."
Something in his voice caused Lina to look at him. He was crying. "Sorry," he said as he started to wipe his face, "I just…I lost all of mine, all five of them, within a day."
Lina felt sick. "I'm so sorry." She whispered as he shook his head.
"I shouldn't have…I have to go."
Lina stared after him as the wagons thundered past, suddenly feeling as though there was not enough air in the palace. She struggled with the impulse to help the children, even if all she could do was read them some stories before they passed. But there were too many, she told herself. She was one woman, and there had to have been ten children in that wagon, in addition to all of the ones already in the hospital. For all Lina knew there could be hundreds of them! And Gourry needed her. Telling herself that there was little she could do for the ill she returned to her seat beside Gourry's bed. "How are you feeling?" she asked as she felt his forehead. Still hot.
"I've been better." He said as he put his sword away.
"You didn't actually expect to be able to swing that thing at an invading army, did you?" she said as she started to tuck the blankets in around him.
"I'm just glad it didn't come to that." He regarded her for a moment before saying, "I'll be fine for a bit if you want to go and help."
"I don't." she said, "I'm not leaving your side until you're better. Besides, it's not like there's a lot I can do for them."
He smiled tiredly, "May be you should try casting a Dragon Slave and scare the plague out of them."
She laughed weakly, "Well, Gourry, that may be the first good idea you've ever had."
He started coughing, and when he settled down his voice was weak. "Not the first good idea I've had."
"Oh?" Lina said, trying to keep her voice casual. "So, you actually had another one?"
"Yes."
"And you remember it?"
He started coughing again so forcefully that the bed shook. Lina straightened in alarm, "Here, drink this." She said as she grabbed a drink she had prepared earlier, filled with honey and opium and some of the supplies she had raided from Zel to help suppress a cough.
"Here," she said, helping to prop him up, bringing the glass to his lips.
Slowly between rounds of coughing he was able to finish the drink. She helped him to settle back onto the pillows as he quieted down, and then started to tuck the blankets around him again. As soon as she finished another fit of coughing erupted, causing him to rend the sheets as he struggled to breathe between coughs.
Lina felt her panic rising. "Hang on." She said as she ran to the stone container, figuring she must not have put enough herbs or water into it. But when she opened it she was disheartened to find that it was well stocked with both.
She returned the lid to its proper place and walked back to her chair, her mind racing to find something to do to help drive the cough away. As she sat down he grabbed her hand and held it tightly. She looked at him in shock. "Getting involved when those bandits were about to attack you." He said, his voice scratchy but earnest, "That was the best idea I ever had."
Lina started to shake, wondering why he was suddenly talking like that. Then a wave of coughing so violent started that he began to spasm. Lina's panic boiled as she watched. What could she do? She'd already gone through all of the most powerful medications for a cough. "Hold on, let me try something." She said desperately before going through the few spells she knew that could help.
Only they didn't. She started thinking about the ill in the east wing who were coughing just as violently as Gourry was now. An alarming feeling of helplessness took over her as she wondered if there was nothing that could be done.
Her mind raced as he continued to cough. Had Zel said anything about a cough? He'd said something about a rash, but not a cough. Dammit, why hadn't she asked more question when he was available?
A chill form down her spine as he started to moan miserably between rounds of coughing. Lina had fought beside him for a long time, had watched as he took injuries that would have wiped out most people but continued to fight. She had never known anyone to have the endurance that he had. For this to wear on him so obviously meant that he must have been suffering greatly. Lina put a hand on his shoulder. "Does it hurt?" she asked.
He didn't say anything, but she could see it in his eyes. She squeezed hers shut for a moment, and then quietly cast a sleeping spell. Instantly he was asleep, even as he continued to cough. Lina just hoped he was beyond the pain.
As the hours painstaking passed Lina wondered if it meant he was getting better or worse. Didn't things sometimes get worse before they got better? Might the coughing get something out of his system? Or did it mean the disease was progressing? She scanned him again for any sign of a rash. Nothing.
A woman came with a plate of food for her and some supplies. She did not eat, she simply could not stomach the thought of it. But she instantly started spooning him the soup. He needed to keep his strength up. When it was gone she busied herself with making medicine for when he'd need it.
It was dusk when there was another knock on the door which was then immediately opened by Amelia. "Miss Lina." She said quietly.
Dimly Lina was aware of a presence behind her, but she had other things on her mind. "He's been coughing, violently. I can't get him to stop."
Amelia walked over to the bed and felt Gourry's forehead, "That happens." She said, her tone uncharacteristically flat as the fourth person entered the room as she grabbed his wrist to check his pulse. "We've not found any way to help. It looks like you have him under a sleep spell. That's for the best."
"Well, well," said the fourth voice. Lina felt the hair on the back of her neck stand up. "Looks like a runt like you did well for herself, Lina."
Stiffly she turned around to see that the fourth person was not only someone she recognized, but someone she hoped never to run into again. Lina stuttered incomprehensively for a few minutes until Amelia said, "I see you've met my sister, Gracia."
Lina's eyes widened in horror. "S-sister?"
"Surprising, isn't it?" Naga asked, her breath heavy with alcohol.
"Wait a minute, if you're Amelia's sister, then that means…" Lina's voice trailed off as horrible visions of Naga ruling Seyruun overtook her mind.
"That means what?" Naga asked as she took a swig from a bottle.
Lina turned away, "That you're next in line for the throne." She said, spitting it out as though it was venom.
"True, I guess I am queen now."
Lina placed her face in her hands. "Seyruun is doomed."
Naga laughed dismissively, "The kingdom has already been done in by this plague. The only way Seyruun can go is up!"
Lina had more important things to worry about than Naga, so she addressed Amelia. "Is there anything we can do for him?"
Amelia closed her eyes tiredly. "Keep him comfortable."
"No, Amelia, there has to be something more…"
Amelia's hands clenched in the blankets, "Something we haven't tried?" Her voice was low, with a dangerous edge to it that Lina had seldom heard. "We've had thousands of people in our hospital. We've tried every combination of spells and medicines. We've even tried letting it run its course without any intervention. We've tried to stop the fever and we've tried to increase it. Nothing makes a difference! That's the insidiousness of this disease. In the end, all we can do is keep them comfortable until…"
"There has to be something else!" Lina interjected, terrified by where Amelia was going.
Amelia closed her eyes in frustration. "Have you told him you love him?"
A strange squelching sound escaped her throat. "What are you talking about?"
Amelia shook her head as she opened her eyes to glare at Lina. "I've never understood you. After he was kidnapped by Hellmaster you were so distraught. I thought that would have opened your eyes to what the two of you have. But no. You didn't realize anything! Years later, and nothing!"
"You mean to tell me that she's been traveling with him for years without becoming involved?" Naga asked incredulously before she laughed derisively. "You really have no idea how to be sexy, do you?"
Lina blushed as she yelled, "And what would you really know about it anyway? And how is it any of your business? It's between Gourry and myself, so butt out already!"
Amelia reddened, "You always marginalize him! I've seen how it hurts him through the years. If you don't tell him soon, it's going to be too late. So you think about that."
Lina stood up, her face flushed and her eyes fiery, "How the hell is that supposed to help him get better?"
"I hope he gets lucky Miss Lina, I really do." Amelia said as she stood up so she could lock eyes with her, "We've already lost so many good people. But you need to face the reality that he most likely won't. There is no justice with this plague! It's killed children, babies, my father, it doesn't give a damn, it just kills!
"Mr. Gourry's devoted his life to you for years! I've watched the two of you together, and it's so obvious what you feel for him, but every time it comes up you deny it! And I've seen how it hurts him when you do. You need to think about what you'll regret not saying if he doesn't make it. And he deserves to hear it from you before he dies."
"He's not going to die!" Lina screamed, shaking with anger, "Besides, what the hell do my words matter? If my actions are speaking as well as you say they are?"
"You're really going to let him die without hearing it?" Amelia roared, her eyes fiery.
Lina felt as though an explosion had gone off within her brain. "Why do you always stick your nose in this? And what would you really know about romance? You, with your naïve talk of love and justice? You with your bodice ripper romances! Have you even had a real romance? Have you and Zel confessed your undying love in a field of roses and singing angels? Or are you still pining away pathetically for him?"
Amelia went crimson as her eyes flamed and her hands balled into fists. Seeing that she had hit her below the belt, Lina continued, "You have all of these ridiculous little girl naïve fantasies and know nothing about how things really work! Because it's not how it works in real life!"
"Oh, I was naïve!" Amelia said, her voice rising in pitch as Naga took a swig from a bottle, watching the fight intently. "I was so naïve! This plague has woken me up all right, but your eyes are still sewn tight. But maybe I was wrong about you. Maybe you don't care for him as much as I thought you did, if you can't even bring yourself to tell him when he's on his deathbed!"
"He's not!" Lina screeched stupidly, "He can't be! And if you can't help then you get the hell out!"
"Gladly," Amelia said as she stood and strode forcefully out the door and slammed it behind her. Shaking with anger, Lina grabbed a book and threw it after her where it hit with enough force to dent the fine wood paneling.
"Show's over, what are you still doing here?" Lina said caustically to Naga.
"Do you love him?"
"What's it to you?" Lina replied. Silence filled the room awkwardly as Lina put her hands to her suddenly aching head as she realized just how tired she was. When was the last time she had slept? With a start she realized it had not been since Gourry had fallen ill.
"Well, if you don't, he is kinda cute and…"
"Get out or I'll throw you out!" Lina screeched. "And I don't give a damn if you're the queen now and this is your palace! Get out!"
Naga shook her head as she moved towards the door. "You do have it bad."
Once the door was closed and Lina was once again alone with him she slouched forward, her breath coming rapidly as she struggled with the impulse to cry as her tired mind struggled to figure out what had just happened. What had happened to Amelia, Miss Love and Justice? To see her so defeated and resigned to death was chilling.
What if she's right!?
Tears spilled from her eyes as she considered the evidence, the sheer amount of people the plague had killed. She leaned back in her chair and debated whether or not to get some sleep, and instantly nixed the idea. She'd sleep when he was better. Or until he passed. With a dawning sense of horror she realized that she wasn't sleeping because she didn't want to waste one minute with him in case he did die.
She found and squeezed Gourry's hand tightly, as if that act alone would keep him with her. Amelia may have given up, but she wasn't going to. Still. She was unable to sleep.
The night passed slowly. Every so often Gourry would be besieged by a coughing fit, but there was little change in his status. Eventually Lina calmed down as she focused her energies on nursing him and reading to him even though he likely could not hear her. A few hours before dawn she noticed that his eyes were open and focused on her. "Hey," she said quietly as she set the book down and checked his forehead.
Still hot and feverish.
"Hey," he replied, his voice hoarse as he started to scratch at his arm.
"Let me get you something to drink." She said as she helped him take a glass of water. "Better?"
"A little." He said, an undercurrent of pain in his voice.
She flailed for something to say. Echoes of her argument with Amelia resonated in her mind. But she could not bring herself to say anything. Eventually he asked, "How long have you been up?"
"Never mind about me." Lina said, "It's you who needs looking after."
"Even so, I'm still your protector." He countered, "I will be, till I die."
Lina shut her eyes, "Let's not talk about that." She snapped, and then she decided to change the topic. "Did I ever tell you about the person I sometimes traveled with before I met you?"
"Even if you did, I can't seem to remember!"
Lina punched him gently on the shoulder. "You are an idiot."
He smiled as he turned towards her, "So, what about this person?"
Lina told him about some of her adventures with Naga as the darkness outside lightened and day started to break. When she realized he was asleep she was disturbed when she realized that she was feeling a sense of regret. She leaned back in her chair and closed her eyes as a new fear gripped her. What if Amelia was right? What if this was the last time he was conscious? What if she had just wasted it by talking about Naga?
Her eyes snapped open when Gourry's breathing hitched like one hit with a sharp pain. Then her eyes widened in horror as she noticed a series of spots, reddish black, marring his pale skin. The bottom seemed to drop from her stomach as she stood up. "No…" she choked.
He thrashed about in his sleep, as though he was struggling to find a way to get comfortable but couldn't. Swiftly she undid his shirt, her revulsion increasing as she noted that the rash was everywhere. The room seemed to careen as she wondered when it had developed. And how? She had been so diligent!
An anguished cry escaped her as she grabbed the lotion Zel had sent. "No!" she murmured as she dabbed a bit on his chest and started to spread it. "No, Gourry, please, no!"
Tears blurred her vision, obstructing it as she still worked frantically to apply the lotion. Zel had said something about it helping with the pain. She did not want him to be in pain! Thankfully he started to settle down as she applied the thick, foul smelling lotion and his breathing became more steady. Painfully Lina wondered if he would wake up.
Someone knocked at the door, but she was too distressed to say anything. After a few moments it opened, and Amelia called, "Miss Lina?"
Lina was shaking as she continued to apply the lotion. For the first time that she could remember she was beyond caring that she was crying in front of someone else, much less two people. Zel followed her in. Amelia walked beside her and put a hand on her arm as she surveyed the scene. "Y-you don't think he's in pain?" Lina asked in trembling tones.
"He looks like he's resting comfortably." Amelia said quietly, "You've done all you could for him."
Lina shook her head as tears continued to stream from her eyes. "No, I haven't." she whispered, suddenly scared that Amelia was going to ask her if she had told him and take her to task when she learned she hadn't.
But Amelia asked her no questions. She simply hugged her tightly, as if to say she knew what she was going through. "You didn't leave his side once. I heard you yesterday in the east wing, you refused to give up on him. He knows that. This plague, it's just beyond our ability to heal."
Lina sobbed as she clung to her. How conceited was she, to think that if she cared for him well enough he would survive? When Amelia, who had loved her father so much, was not able to see him through the plague alive? Lina started to wonder if she was just so used to winning that she had started to take it for granted.
Amelia patted her back consolingly. "What do you need from me?"
Lina shook her head as she tried to dry her eyes, but then gave it up as a lost cause. More tears kept flowing, "I-I just want to be alone with him."
"Of course." She said as she squeezed Lina's arms as she pulled away and then turned to grab Gourry's hand. "It was an honor to get to know you and fight with you, Mr. Gourry. Don't worry, we'll take care of Miss Lina. Safe journey."
Lina stared as Amelia walked away and waited by the door. Numbly Lina sat down as Zel walked to the bed. She wondered if Gourry could hear their farewells. "I'm sorry, Lina, I wasn't able to find anything that could help him in time."
Lina's head was hurting so much with grief that she couldn't speak. Morbidly she started to wonder when Zel would have his breakthrough. A year later? A month? A week? Tomorrow? What a sick joke that would be if he found it tomorrow.
Zel clasped Gourry on the shoulder, "This plague has claimed so many. I always thought that the first of us to die would perish in battle. Not like this. Peaceful journey."
Anger started to flare within her. He wasn't dead yet! Just because no one who had gotten a rash had survived didn't mean that Gourry couldn't be the first! But when Zel turned to regard her, his expression haunted with the ghosts of the people who had come to the palace seeking help only to die, her anger cooled to despair.
"Is there anything I can get you?" he asked.
Lina didn't trust herself to speak. She shook her head mutely. Zel clasped her on the shoulder and left. Silence filled the room for a moment, and then compelled by a force she did not understand, she grabbed Gourry's hand. "I can't even think of what I'd do without you."
He did not respond, showed no sign that he had heard her. Undaunted Lina continued, "Every day for years. We've been together. Okay, there were times where we weren't, and my life was miserable."
She swiped at her eyes as she laughed bitterly before she continued, the words falling out of her mouth faster than she could properly think through them. "When Hellmaster took you, that was when I first realized how important you had become to me. I missed you so much, but it wasn't until Sylphiel asked me if I still was only traveling with you for the Sword of Light that I realized something that should have been so obvious. I didn't miss the Sword of Light. I hadn't even thought about it till then, a few weeks after you had been kidnapped!
Was it her imagination, or had he nodded a bit? She took a deep breath as she wondered if she would have enough time to say everything. "The morning after you were kidnapped, I made the decision to fight Hellmaster to rescue you, not the stupid sword. When I realized that I couldn't care less what happened to the sword as long as you were safe and back with me, I realized what a stupid excuse the whole traveling with each other for the sword was."
She sat with him quietly for a moment, hoping that he would magically wake up and talk to her. "I lived without you for so long before I met you but after knowing you, I couldn't imagine going back to that life. I still can't. It just seems so lonely now."
She squeezed his hand gently and was surprised to feel him squeezing back. Was she imagining things? Was it a mere reflex? Or something else? A crazy, desperate thought that she could keep him with her if she kept talking formed. So Lina continued, "When we first met, I wanted you to be smitten with love for me. I don't think I ever forgave you when you weren't. Sometimes I wondered if that was why I could never move forward with you, even after realizing what I had found with you after I rescued you, but that wasn't it. It was never something you did. It was me stopping me.
"Even now, even facing this I can't explain it. That's a horrible excuse, isn't it?"
Lina's eyes became heavy as she stewed in her thoughts for a moment. "Traveling with you, I had so much fun. It just can't be over, Gourry."
Can it?