First of all thank you so much to everyone who has taken an interest in this story and followed, favourited or reviewed it! Your great comments are so encouraging! I always love hearing from you!
Now we know where this is going to go, we'll start at the very beginning.
12 months earlier
"Shit!" Merlin cannot believe he has ruined another sample. This is the third one this morning. It is hard enough to get a hold of blood samples containing Serum. Destroying them "en masse" as he's managed in just a couple of hours is not exactly a very bright thing to do. The fragile glass plate has slipped his fingers and lies on the floor now, broken in thousands of tiny pieces. The delicate contents are contaminated by dust and dirt and completely useless for further research.
Merlin stares at the shards accusingly and then pieces the glass together with a quick flash of gold and one slight wave of his hand. Even if the sample's spoilt, he's at least not wasted the glass plate.
"Merlin." Gaius chides him, but his voice is warm and full of affection, even if it has the familiar hint of exasperation in it. "You know better than to use magic inside the Institute."
Of course Gaius is right. He's acted out of instinct, without really thinking, yet again. Anybody could have come through the door to their lab just that very second to see. And then hell would have broken loose and he would have not only lost a job he dearly loves, but also compromised his family, his friends and the research Gaius and he had been working on secretly for such a long time. And that would have been really the last thing on earth he needed. Particularly at this moment in time.
"I really think you should call it a day."
The old scientist looks at the young lanky man in front of him. Merlin has not been his usual efficient self in the last two days. No wonder considering the recent events. He really needs to take some time off until things have settled, whatever that may entail.
Merlin nods. He knows his work has suffered after the catastrophic news on Wednesday and he's certainly not been living up to his reputation as the most gifted biochemist in the Institute. He had figured that work might do him good and take his mind of the dread that hangs over him like the sword of Damocles. But he has made one embarrassing mistake after another this morning.
"Go and see Hunith." Gaius adds and squeezes his shoulder gently. "She really needs you just now."
"Thanks, Gaius." Merlin genuinely appreciates the kindness and the advice of the much older man. Of course, nobody - apart from his parents - knows him as well as his mentor and immediate superior in this facility. Gaius has been a family friend for as long as he remembers, and he has no idea what he would have done without him when he was just a boy and not quite sure what to do with his magic. Who knows what would have become of him without Gaius's guidance. His mum does not have magic after all and though his father is a talented sorcerer he's nowhere near as powerful as Merlin.
Even the faintest thought about his father has an immediate effect on him. His throat has gone all dry and his heart has started to beat at double speed.
His father. Balinor.
Merlin's eyes involuntarily flick to the wall where the most important news flashes of the last few days are continuously displayed on a fibre optic glass screen. He stares at the front page of today's paper, unable to process what the heck has happened.
Collusion with Evil
Balinor Emerson
Blacklisted Sorcerer caught in attempt to free convicted Magic Users.
Captain of Justice Squad killed.
Balinor's usually not only cautious and meticulous in everything he does, he has years of experience dealing with the soldiers of the Justice Squad. This should not have happened. End of story. The fact that it has and that this is his new reality is more than mind blowing.
He's read the article that goes with the headline. It's been painful to stomach all the deceit and falsified information the Pendragon Regime has been dishing up to make his father look like a devil walking the earth. When all he did was trying to save some innocent people, a family of five who'd been reported by a neighbour for using magic in their home. At least they had got away. So his father's efforts hadn't been in vain.
He had wanted to accompany him that night, but his father had been adamant.
"This is too dangerous, my boy." He had said with a stern look on his face. "I don't want to see you anywhere near there." There was no point in arguing with his father when it came to this. They'd discussed it enough often before.
Now that the worst has happened, he keeps asking himself why he didn't insist? Why had he given in so easily? He could have saved his father, he is sure. If only he'd been there.
"Stop blaming yourself, Merlin." Gaius startles the younger man out of his thoughts. "Your father knew what he was doing when he asked you to stay behind."
Merlin grits his teeth. They've had this discussion at least three times since this morning, but he knows that nothing Gaius says will help him feel better about this. His father's been caught and he's going to die if he is given the Serum. And as far as Merlin can see it is all his fault.
"Give Hunith my love." Gaius says and hugs Merlin heartily. "And I'll see you tonight at the meeting, okay?
"Sure. See you later Gaius." Merlin attempts a smile. "And thanks, you know …" Gaius just claps his shoulder in acknowledgement and then Merlin is out of the door.
He whisks along the corridor, his mind running over ideas and options what their next course of action has to be. One thing's for sure. There's no way he is just going to stand by and watch his father die at the hand of the Pendragons. Something needs to be done, and pretty soon, too.
Half an hour later he lets himself into the house where he grew up.
"Merlin!" Hunith has appeared at the living room door. She's pale and her red eyes give away that she's been crying. Not that she ever does it in front of him or anyone else for that. She's keeping up appearances and she does it very well. Underneath it all though, Merlin's certain, she is breaking apart.
Wordlessly Merlin opens his arms to envelope his mother in a tight embrace. He can feel the sigh of relief she exhales when she rests her head on his chest.
"Thanks for coming." She murmurs and holds onto her son like a lost child. Merlin automatically starts wrapping his magic around her, cocooning her in it like in a huge pink ball of cotton wool.
"Onlæ." He whispers and is gratified when he feels her body respond to the relaxation spell.
Hunith looks up at him and gently strokes across his cheek. "What would I do without you, my son?" And she rewards him with a tiny smile and a gentle kiss.
Merlin's eyes are tearing up despite his best effort to remain calm and collected for her . Of course this is exactly why Balinor had made it a rule from his first day in the FMU that they should never go out on a mission together.
"Somebody needs to be there for Hunith, should anything happen." He'd often explained when Merlin had been left behind on an assigment Balinor was leading.
"Come." Merlin gently coaxes his mother into the living room and they get settled on the cosy settee.
"Have you heard anything new?" Merlin enquires, anticipating the answer but asking anyway to get Hunith to talk.
"Nothing official, Merlin." She shakes her head. "But Will says that the trial will probably take place later today."
Thank God for Will who's able to get some kind of information out of the Justice Ministry. Although he's not disclosed exactly how. From what Merlin knows he has got some kind of informer inside. Not that he really cares as long as they find out what the latest moves of Pendragon government are and how Balinor's case is proceeding. Lawsuits involving magic offences are usually kept completely behind locked doors and out of the public eye.
"Later today, hmmm." Merlin repeats. His mum knows what's coming, and so does he. The Pendragons do not waste time when there's a case against the use of magic. The verdict will, no doubt, come through by the evening. He's glad he listened to Gaius and left work early. Hunith needs his support 24/7 just now. She is going to rely on his strength when the inevitable happens.
"They're going to give him the Serum, aren't they?" She asks breathlessly, barely able to hide the anguish in her voice. He notes that she's phrased the comment as a half question, as if there's some hope that she might be mistaken. Even though it's common knowledge what happens by default to sorcerers convicted of doing magic. He fervently wishes he could contradict her. But Balinor has not only got magic, he has also killed one of the Pendragon's security men. And that alone demands the severest of all punishments.
"How long do you reckon has he got after it?"
"Nobody can be sure of it, mum." Merlin does not really want to say what he thinks because it would feel like kicking someone who is already down. He is also not certain that he can face the cold truth himself.
Hunith has started trembling and Merlin hates to see his mother who's calm and composed by nature so upset and nervous.
"Have you been sleeping at all?" He strokes over her hair trying to calm her again.
Hunith throws him a look that implies that he already knows the answer to this.
"You need some rest. Shall I help?" Merlin offers and is glad when she agrees.
"Just for the afternoon though, Merlin." She gives her consent. "I need to be awake for the meeting this evening."
"Sure. Of course you need to be there." Merlin places his hands on her head, closes his eyes and visualizes his mother sleeping soundly.
"Beslæpan!" He mutters under his breath and a second later Hunith relaxes into his arms and then her breathing becomes steady and regular. Merlin carefully places his mum's sleepy form on to the sofa and covers her with the woolly blanket that is thrown over the arm rest. Then he quietly closes the living room door and wanders into the kitchen to make himself a cup of tea and find something to eat. He walks over to the fridge and stops short in front of it.
There's a family photograph pinned to the door. It was taken five months ago, before Morgana went off to Avalon University for her third year of English Literature. Actually she should be back soon. He tried to put her off coming home, not wanting to disrupt her education but she would not hear any of it.
"Balinor might not be my biological father …" she'd said "but he's the only dad I ever had and I'll be damned if I miss out on showing him my support in a time that matters. And Hunith will be glad of some female company." And that had been the end of it.
As if on cue Merlin hears a key in the front door and seconds later Morgana's in the kitchen hugging him.
"I came as quickly as I could." She throws the car key on the sideboard and dumps her bag in a corner.
"You must have broken quite a few speed records on the motorway." Merlin looks at her with a big question mark on his face.
"I did make the engine spin that little bit faster." Morgana grins and winks at her foster brother, knowing full well that he would never condone such reckless use of magic. Then they both give each other a quick once over as it's been weeks since they have last met.
"You are looking thinner again." Morgana teases. But still so bloody handsome. Something inside her adds before she can stop it.
"You look fabulous, little sister." Merlin pecks her on the cheek. "Uni really suits you. How many hearts have you broken this term so far?"
Morgana giggles. "Too many to remember." But not the one I'd like to break most. Morgana shakes her head trying to control her wayward mind. Damn. She really had thought that she had this under control. Time to change the topic. That is not why she's here after all.
"So how are things?" She enquires, turning all serious, and Merlin takes a couple of minutes to fill her in.
"I hate the Pendragons." Morgana pushes out when Merlin stops and her cheeks are flushed with annoyance. "I hate them more than I've ever done before. We all deserve to have a life in this country, and it is bloody time that they're shown that we are a force to be reckoned with."
Merlin can feel the anger radiating from her. If anything, Morgana has become even more radical since she's been at uni and met a crowd of sorcerers who share her belief that the current regime should be ousted by magic. For once and for all. The sooner, the better. Magic should reign freely again, they say, as it used to be before the ancestors of the present governor came into power.
"Remember when we were kids and we made up plans how we would take revenge on the Pendragons for things they'd done?" Morgana reminisces and her brow furrows deeply.
"Yeah, poor Uther and Arthur died quite a few unorthodox deaths." Merlin smirks.
"We could still rekindle some of those ideas…" Morgana suggests tentatively.
"Wish it was as easy."
"Maybe it is?" Morgana catches Merlin's gaze and looks at him as if she expects something to happen. When Merlin just shakes his head and sighs, mumbling something like. "This is the real world though." She clenches her teeth and turns away.
Merlin who has known her for so long is quite aware that something is amiss. Of course he understands why she feels so strongly about the Pendragons. They stand for everything that is wrong in Albion from her point of view. Uther has always been the main catalyst for all the evil that has befallen MUs all over the country. Morgana's parents included. They were both killed in a raid by soldiers of the Justice Squad.
Merlin remembers when Hunith had come home one day when he was seven, holding a small distraught girl of about two in her arms.
"Alator found her. She has magic." His mum had said. "There's no one of her family left. She needs a home that understands her. Poor little thing." Merlin can still clearly recall his father lifting Morgana onto his lap without any hesitation.
"What's her name?" He had looked to Hunith for an answer but was surprised when the girl answered herself, quite unafraid and forward. "I'm Morgana. Are you my new dad?"
Balinor had chuckled and placed a kiss onto her head. "You're a brave one, aren't you?" He'd said and that had sealed their bond.
Yes, Morgana has good reason to detest the Pendragons, but Merlin doesn't believe in violent solutions by default. It has never been his way, or indeed Balinor's. As much as he loves his sister he will never agree with her on that point. She has always viewed her magic as a tool to get what she wanted, even when she was a little girl.
"You know that a war to free magic will not solve anything, Morgana." Merlin tries to appease her. "And so many lives would be lost, on both sides."
"What's the point of all your power if you can never use it? It's pointless. Imagine what you could do, how you could shape the world…" Morgana's temper flares up, just as it always has when she tries to argue her opinion. Her eyes are blazing and her body is shaking with contained anger. Although Morgana has never held back in speaking out against the government, this outrage is on a different scale. She pauses as she notices Merlin's lips purse and his eyes shadow with concern. He's worried. Morgana notices his side way glance and quickly reins herself in. The last thing she wants to do just now is to fall out with Merlin.
"All I mean is that something needs to be done. This can't go on any longer. Look where it got us. Look at dad…" And at that her voice falters.
"I know you're upset." Merlin mutters and gently pulls her close. "And maybe one day there will be a fair and just Albion for all its citizens. All we have to think about now is how to save our father."
Morgana knows when to back down.
"Sorry I was getting carried away. I am so worried …" She bites her lips and Merlin realizes that he's forgotten for a moment that this is as hard on her as it is on him and his mum.
"Sure, sis. Come here." Then he folds his arms around her and they stand quietly in their embrace. Merlin's trying to comfort her, offering strength and patience and brotherly love and gently rubs her back.
And though Morgana understands his intention and appreciates his kindness with all her heart, she cannot help but notice the warmth of his body and the familiar scent of his after shave. And she instinctively wants to lean into him and … Damn. This cannot go on any longer. It has to stop. Because Merlin is her family. And she won't risk losing that.
And so Morgana unwraps herself a bit too hastily out of his embrace. "All calm here again." She mutters and squeezes his arm before she adds. "Better get a shower before the FMU descend on us!" she gives Merlin a vague smile, turns, and jogs upstairs.
Merlin gazes blankly at the staircase where Morgana has just disappeared. "Typical Morgana." He mumbles and then sneaks into the living room to check on Hunith who is still fast asleep. Time for him to get a quick breather, too.
When Merlin opens the door to his old bedroom he immediately feels like a teenager again. Everything has been left exactly the way it was on the day he left for university. The old posters are still gracing the walls and books and magazines still teetering on a pile on the desk near the window.
It brings back so many memories. Of his life then, his friends, his sister and his parents. And his father, of course.
There are photos of their holiday at the southern beach of Carleon on a pinboard on the wall. Balinor had taught him to swim that summer and how to catch fish with the wink of an eye. Then there are the books on magic his father gave him to read when he became aware of his powers. They have been sitting on his book shelf to this day, disguised as reference books of some kind.
Merlin throws himself onto the freshly made up bed – no doubt Hunith has anticipated him staying for the night – pulls his arms behind his head and closes his eyes.
"Father." He whispers in his head hoping that maybe this time he will reach Balinor. "Father." He repeats, swearing not to give up yet. "Are you there?"
But Balinor doesn't answer. The silence is deafening and Merlin's heart sinks.
It had been on his tenth birthday when they'd connected by telepathy and over the years it had strengthened their bond in so many ways. Merlin had always looked up to his father, admired him for his wisdom, his goodness and his tenacity and he tried to make him proud. But what would Balinor want him to do now? How can he sit back and watch his demise rather than go out and try to do SOMETHING to save him.
Merlin's lips twitch when he thinks about it. Because if you look at it in the cold light of the days Balinor is a rebel. Even a criminal if you define him by the laws of the country. Neither view tells the real story. Namely the story of a man who's been risking his life relentlessly to save others. People who are innocent, but simply pursued for their magic. People who are caught using magic for the good, like healing and seeing. People who perform magic to help others for the benefit of all.
While Uther Pendragon hates magic so much that he cannot see beyond its existence, Balinor knows where to draw a fair line. Those sorcerers who abuse their powers will never receive a helping hand from him and he's been called a hypocrite and traitor for that by the radical fractions in the FMU. To Merlin though Balinor is a hero, a man of integrity who understands what good and evil means.
Merlin calls out for his father a third time, not expecting an answer, but as this is all he can do at the moment, he tries anyway. When no reply is forthcoming, he lets his head sink onto his pillow and sets his mind free. He needs to clear his thoughts before this evening.
At the stroke of nine the inner circle of the FMU has congregated and settled around the round table in Hunith's kitchen.
Merlin has greeted them all: Gaius and Alator, the oldest family friends and Balinor's closest allies. Alice and Hunith, the grand dames of the circle. Gilli and Will, his childhood friends, and of course Morgana and himself.
They have been heading the actions of the FMU for years and each of them represents a certain part of the magic community: seers, healers, druids and sorcerers of all kinds. Their faces are all sombre. Balinor is their leader and his capture has rattled them. As the oldest present Gaius opens the meeting and is the first to speak.
"We all know why we're here today. " And he looks round the table receiving acknowledging looks while Merlin gives him a curt nod. "So let's get straight down to it: What are we going to do?"
"Just blast him out." Morgana suggests in the full knowledge that most of those present would never agree to this, and she can see Merlin raising his eyebrows.
"Morgana." Hunith scolds her tenderly, but she has not let go of her daughter's hand that is tightly wrapped around hers.
"I think that's not quite the solution we're looking for." Gaius speaks out what everyone's thinking and shortly states what his own opinion.
"If what Will's contact has told us is correct, Balinor will be convicted and injected tomorrow morning. From experience we know that he's got between three and five months after that. If we want to save him we have to find an antidote for the Serum as quickly as we can."
Silence descends on the room. Time is not exactly on their side in this endeavour.
"How far have you got with decoding the Serum?" Gilli asks and looks expectantly at Gaius and Merlin.
"Not far enough to produce the antidote. There's something we seem to be missing." Merlin admits rather sheepishly. Breaking samples like he did this morning has also not been very helpful.
"Yes, there's a missing link to the formula that we cannot seem to figure out, no matter what we've tried." Gaius confirms reluctantly.
Developing an antidote will probably take long enough, although magic could help that along, but without the complete chemical composition of the Serum it will certainly never happen.
"So what we need to do is to get the proper formula, first of all." Alator sums up. "They must have a blueprint somewhere in the Ministry of Justice."
"Great." Gilli growls in exasperation. "We've never been able to get through those doors so far." Which has been due to the well-established fact that the Ministry is equipped with every security measure known to mankind. "Surely there's no way we could break in?"
"That's not what anyone's suggesting, Gilli." Will is pulling a face at his friend. "But we must either find a way of getting inside the Ministry to locate the formula or persuade Uther to hand it over voluntarily."
"Uther? Hand over the formula voluntarily? And YOU think I have lost my mind." Gilli looks at Will as if he's grown a purple beard, a pink tail and angel's wings in the same instant.
"Just think of it, Gilli. All we need is something we can bargain against the formula." Something that Uther would trade for it without thinking."
"There aren't so many things that precious to Uther." Gilli retorts sarcastically.
"Hold on, Gilli. Will's right." Morgana has been hit by a wave of inspiration. "And it's not so much a case of something rather than who."
All eyes turn to her and there is a sudden hush in the room.
"Arthur." Morgana states triumphantly.
"What are you saying, child?" Gaius looks at her sceptically, a bit like a school teacher after a pupil has given an unexpected answer.
"If we believe the press and all those reports we've seen over the years Arthur is the one person Uther genuinely cares about." Everyone around the table nods in agreement.
"Hence, he's the perfect bargaining tool." Morgana finishes in conclusion.
"Did I hear you right there, Morgana?" Alator throws in. "You want to trade Arthur against the formula?"
"That and handing over dad." Morgana's mouth is a tight line now, determination pouring out of her gaze. "Surely that's a deal Uther wouldn't be able to turn down?"
"Hold on! Hold on!" Merlin intervenes rather alarmed.
"Have you all gone off your head? " Merlin is raising the voice of reason. "Do you realize what this could mean for any of us and our families? Uther will do everything he has in his power to find those responsible for taking his son away from him. And if we ask him to exchange Arthur for dad, he will know exactly where to start looking. Let's face it. We will eventually be headhunted and none of our families would be safe anymore."
Pondering silence spreads in the room. Merlin is right. This plan would put not only them, but also all their families into mortal danger.
"So what do you think we should do then?" Gilli asks in a resigned voice.
Merlin stands up while maintaining eye contact with each person in the room.
"I think we should go back to what we said earlier. Maybe there's a way to get a hold of the formula before we move on to more extreme measures."
"And how are going to do that?" Morgana raises her brow. "Waltz in and ask for it?"
"Have any of you read the tabloids recently?" Alice who has only listened so far, leans forward and looks round the table with a sudden spark. It is not that she's a friend of the common press but she has bought a range of papers throughout the last week to make sure she got every little bit of information about her friend's arrest.
""Yes, there were a couple of reports that none of Arthur's PAs have lasted any length of time in recent years and that he's currently re-advertising the post." Gilli smirks.
"No wonder, the arrogant prat he is." Morgana mumbles and a few of them nod.
"A right spoilt, conceited bastard, from what I've heard, who is bedding every male alive in Camelot." Will agrees between gritted teeth. And then throws a glance at Gilli. "Never realized you were one for reading the tabloids."
Gilli raises two fingers and mouths "Shut up, Will." across the table.
"Stop bickering guys!" Merlin mumbles. "Thinking about it, this is perfect. A PA job in Arthur's office would not only get me right into the heart of the Justice Ministry but also as close to Arthur as possible. And he is the man responsible for the Serum." Yes, this is ideal, indeed. He thinks to himself. Infiltrating the Ministry will also get him close to his father and the place where the formula is most likely kept.
"Don't be ridiculous, Merlin. You have not the slightest clue what a PA does. Arthur would never dream of employing you! You are a biochemist, not a secretary." Gaius is not impressed and looks at Merlin with scepticism.
"I did study media for a couple of semesters." Merlin defends his idea . "Surely it can't be that difficult and as for the employing part – I am sure Gilli and Will can magic up a CV for me that makes me totally irresistible!"
Hunith heads pops up and her eyes are asking just one question: "Why you, Merlin? I can't lose both of you." Merlin swallows hard, because the plight of his mother is not lost on him, but how can he not volunteer for this job?
This is his father they are talking about and it is his fault that he's in prison to start with. He is the one with the magic and therefore he should be the one to put this right.
"I need to do this for him and myself, too, mum. And I'm the only one who's able to decipher a chemical formula." He puts his arm on his mother's in an attempt to pacify her.
"But…" Hunith has turned dreadfully pale. "If something happens to you, …" She does not finish her sentence for the second time in a row. Merlin may be a powerful warlock but he can still get shot, stabbed, beaten up or hurt in any other physical way.
She prefers to stop her train of thought at this point because she knows it will do her no good. She understands that Merlin has made up his mind and that there is no way she can change it.
"I know what you're thinking mum." Merlin puts his hand on his mother's and gently squeezes her fingers. "But this is going to work. It has to. Because we need to save dad. And once we have the formula, the Serum will be no threat to our kind any longer."
"Hear, hear." Alator agrees and the rest join in a quiet clap. "And if all fails we can always come back to Morgana's plan." And he winks at the young woman.
"So I take it we are agreed." Merlin takes a last check around the table. This is a big step up for the FMU. Saving innocent people is one thing, trying to infiltrate the Ministry of Justice and get up close to the heir of the Pendragon government is a completely different kettle of fish altogether.
So that's Merlin set up to go. :)
Feel free to review - I am looking forward to every comment, criticism etc!