He is standing against a lamppost in the old parking lot across the street. His head is tilted up towards the dark and ominous sky. I try to look at his face, but I am too far to see the details.
I have known Tobias Eaton ever since I was a child. His father, Marcus works with my father as powerful government officials of our faction, Abnegation. When we were younger Marcus would bring his son to dinner every week and we would all eat together and later when the adults were talking and discussing important matters, Caleb, Tobias, and I would always play together. The three of us used to be inseparable, but then we all began to grow up and the Eaton's began to distance themselves from us. Our parents still see each other at work and we occasionally speak to Tobias, but we have never once been the friends we used to be those many years ago. For the longest time, Caleb and I wondered what we did to make Tobias separate himself from us and when we tried to find out why, Mother and Father told us that he had other things happening in his life, they told us to be unselfish and leave him alone, and so we did.
Caleb follows the direction of my glance and sees his former friend and then looks back at me. "Let's go talk to him." He starts to make his way across the old pavement and I follow him.
"Why? It's been years since we've had an actual conversation," I ask my brother while almost tripping on some weeds growing in the cracks of the former street and then I regain my footing. "I know I'm not the only one who feels hurt because he left us behind."
Caleb tenses for a second and then he becomes calm once again. "This is the right thing to do and this might be our last chance to ever talk to him again."
It's hard to think about that, even though we've been told over and over again what happens when you become an adult. If I decide to leave, I'll never be able to see the faces that I grew up with. As much as I am angry with Tobias for giving up on our friendship, I would never be at peace with myself if I didn't take the chance to say goodbye when I had the opportunity.
When we reach the other side of the street Caleb tries to think of something to say, but instead just clears his throat. I see that in Caleb's eyes he wants to say so much all at once, but remains silent. My brother is just like all of the other people living Abnegation, he forgets about what he wants and focuses on others. I feel so different and far away from him sometimes. Right now I want to yell at Tobias, he hurt us and he didn't even try to explain the reasons for abandoning us. I am angry and unlike my brother and Abnegation, I want to be self centered and tell Tobias what's been on my mind for these past years.
My brother somehow senses what I am thinking and gives me a look that tells me to forget about whatever I plan on saying. I know he's right so I don't say anything when Tobias turns his head towards us, but I do manage to give Caleb a look that shows him how frustrated I am. He ignores me and says to Tobias, "How have you been? It's been a while."
"I wonder whose fault that is?" I mutter to myself.
Caleb gives me another look and is about to scold me when Tobias says, "You haven't changed a bit, haven't you Beatrice?" He smirks at me, but then starts to frown. "You're right though."
I look up at him to see if he's serious and say, "About what?" I know I'm right, I just want to hear him finally say what Caleb and I have been curious about for all of these years.
Tobias looks from Caleb to me, "I should've never left you both without explaining why and-"
"Why did you leave? We were best friends and you just dumped us!" I interrupted him.
Tobias winces after I finish speaking. Caleb feels his discomfort and turns to me, "Beatrice we should get home before our parents do." He turns to Tobias, "It was really good catching up with you." I start to protest, but Caleb gives me another one of his looks that tells me I am crossing a line and that I should shut my mouth. I have so much more to say, but Caleb is right again about getting home and not saying something I would regret. Caleb and I turn our backs and start to walk the home. There are so many things I wish I could've changed about the past, but now I just wish that Tobias, Caleb, and I could be close once again. After taking a few steps, I turn my head and look back at him one last time to say goodbye, but it comes out only as a soft whisper broken apart by the rough winds flowing through the skies of Abnegation.
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