Chapter 2
All Jenny wanted was a hot shower and her bed. Sitting alone on the bus, she had mentally started to make a plan—something to divert her attention from what had happened. She decided first she would take a shower, and then she would crawl into her bed and sleep. She craved both deep in her bones as she stepped off the elevator. Upon rounding the corner and seeing six sets of eyes fixed on her, she knew it wasn't going to happen.
Sucking in a sharp breath and ignoring the pounding in her head, she looked at her father. She felt her hands start to shake. "Dad, I—"
"Do you have any idea how worried we've all been?" he cut in quietly. From beside him on the loveseat, Lily reached for his hand, giving Jenny a gently disapproving look.
Jenny let her eyes drift shut for a brief moment, choosing to ignore Dan, Serena, Eric, and Nate all crammed together on the opposite couch. She took a tentative step forward. "Dad …" She trailed off at a loss.
"Where have you been?" Rufus demanded quietly.
Now she looked at the foursome on the couch. Dan's gaze was accusing, spearing her with anger and annoyance. Serena looked empathetic—she herself had been here before more times than anyone could count. Eric and Nate both looked exhausted and concerned.
Jenny swallowed and looked back at her dad and knew there was no way she could get into what had happened to her with all of them sitting there like judge and jury.
"I mean," Rufus went on after a heavy pause, "where did you go after the club?" With that he tossed something into the coffee table.
Jenny's heart sank. Her cell phone. No wonder she hadn't been able to find it.
"Nate found that when he went to pick you up, but you had already left."
Her gaze swung to Nate as she tried to remember the fragmented bits from the night before. Nothing was making sense.
Nate's shoulders sagged and he gave a sad shake of his head. "I saw you getting into the cab with Agnes."
Agnes.
The name slammed into her, sending her reeling. Agnes had been there. She had gone backstage to get her things and Agnes had handed her a drink…
After that, things got fuzzy and muted. A blur of colors and sounds, but nothing sharp and definite.
"You saw me with Agnes?" Jenny pressed, her brow knit in deep concentration.
He nodded slowly. "I called your phone, but when I got to the bar you were already gone."
"Wait—" Growing more confused by the second, she held up a hand to stop him. "What bar?"
Dan sighed loudly, rolling his eyes to the ceiling and shaking his head. "Seriously, Jen? Were you that wasted you can't even remember where you were?"
"Dan," Serena started softly, her tone warning him to back off. She laid a hand against his arm and shook her head.
Rufus stood up, shoving his hands deep into his pockets. "You know, Jenny, I thought you going back to Eleanor's would be a good thing. I thought maybe it would help get you back on track. If I knew you would start hanging out with Agnes and going out drinking …" He sighed. "I just expected more of you."
Jenny could feel the sharp sting of tears pricking the backs of her eyes. She opened her mouth to explain, but no sound came out. How could she explain anything to them when she didn't even understand herself?
"After everything that happened with Damien and the lying … I truly thought you had learned your lesson, Jenny. Clearly I was wrong."
She took a deep, shaky breath. "Dad, please. I didn't—"
"Didn't what?" Rufus asked, never raising his voice. "Did you drink last night?"
She frowned, thinking of the champagne flute. "Yes, but—"
"Did you go to a bar with Agnes?"
She swallowed a sob. "It's not what you think."
"Where were you last night?" he asked finally.
She rubbed her temples, thinking of the apartment she had woken up in. The rumpled sheets, the smell of sweat lingering in the room.
"I can't…" She couldn't finish the sentence. The words simply weren't there.
Rufus shook his head. "Go to your room, Jenny," he ordered quietly. He turned away from her and moved to the window.
Wordlessly, soundlessly, and without glancing at anyone else, she turned and walked slowly up the stairs. Her legs were stiff and she was sore inside and out. She made it to the landing and lengthened her stride until she was safe inside her own room. She flipped the lock and leaned back against the door as her legs gave out.
Pressing a hand to her chest, she felt her breath catch and then she was crying, sobbing, as the dam broke. She curled her legs up to her chest and rested her forehead against them, giving up.
"I can't believe her," Dan muttered, going for his coat. He jerked it on, seething. Rufus and Lily had retreated to their room moments after Jenny, leaving the four teenagers on the couch to speculate where Jenny had been and what she had been doing.
"Oh, come on, Dan," Serena cajoled, shrugging from her place on the couch. "So she went out and got drunk. This isn't the end of the world."
Eric frowned. "But Jenny doesn't drink."
"Apparently she does now," Dan countered, scoffing.
Serena sighed and rolled her gaze over to Nate, who was oddly silent. "Come on. We've all done worse things than going out and getting wasted. Jenny's not a little kid anymore."
Dan squinted at her, his gaze incredulous. "Tell me you aren't serious."
Serena chuckled. "Dan, I think you need to calm down."
Shaking his head, he started for the door. "Maybe you had no problem going out, getting drunk and doing God knows what when you were sixteen, but that isn't what I want for my little sister." He turned and walked away.
Serena's mouth dropped open. "Unbelievable."
Eric was still frowning. "This just doesn't seem like Jenny." He stood up and headed for the kitchen.
Serena shrugged and stood up, looking down at Nate. He was still staring blankly at the opposite wall, thinking.
"Nate? Nate?" she pressed, finally shaking his shoulder.
He blinked and looked up at her.
She smiled down at him. "Ready to go?"
Nate stood slowly, his eyes moving around the room before landing on her. "I'm just going to use the bathroom and we can go."
She nodded and reached for her mother's copy of Vogue that was lying on the end table. She sank back onto the couch and started flipping through it as he went to the stairs.
Nate took them two at a time, pausing when he reached the second floor. He followed the hallway down to the bathroom, passing Jenny's door as he went. He hesitated, lingering at her door. He tilted his head, listening.
He could hear her crying on the other side and something in his gut twisted. Seeing her downstairs, so defeated and exhausted bothered him more than he wanted to let on. She looked genuinely at a loss, completely bereft.
Something just wasn't right with this whole thing.
He had seen Jenny go head-to-head with her father before. Had watched her openly defy anyone who would challenge her. Even when she was wrong, there had been a strength and a determination to her that made him want to smile and shake her all at once on more than one occasion.
She had none of the fire downstairs. She seemed confused and lost.
Before he could over think it, he knocked on her door. He waited, hearing her shift inside the room and the lock flip open.
"Dad, I really just want—" she began as she opened the door, stopping when she Nate standing there. Her eyes widened and two more tears fell in tandem down her crimson cheeks. She sniffed and reached up with shaking hands to wipe the tears away.
Nate sucked in a sharp breath, stunned. She looked nothing like the confident, self-assured social queen she had been projected the last few months. Her eyes were swollen and red from crying, her cheeks were splotchy, and her hair was a wreck.
His eyes rounded as worry flooded him. "Jenny—"
"Nate?" Serena called up from the bottom of the steps. "Are you almost done?"
His gaze went from the stairway back to Jenny's face. He started to shake his head, not caring that Serena was waiting for him. He raised a hand to push her door open more.
Jenny leaned her head against the door for a brief second and then looked up at him. "Go, Nate. Just go." She shut the door on his face and turned the lock back into place.