Thanks to Leyshla Gisel for being my first reviewer! Also a thanks to all of those who added this to their favourites and alerts lists.
Disclaimer: I own nothing but any of the OC's who make an appearance.
Walking the streets of Atlanta again, Ajax wondered when it had turned into such a shit hole. Sure, cities had their own sorts of ghettos alike, but the whole place was as beautiful as a slaughter house. Her eyes saw everything shaded through her dark goggles, like the world was one black hole, consuming them all excruciatingly slow. Why not get it the fuck over with, she thought bitterly. She was never such a pessimist before-argumentative and opinionated yes-but not a down right stickler that hated the world. It seemed frivolous to ever express hate on such a wasted effort when her resources were better spent on survival. Judging by the way she looked, people would not have pegged her to last as long as she did, Hell she even doubted herself at least ten times in a day. The group she was with now, well she'd be damned if she didn't admit they were swell. They were bizarrely mixed, no question, but social hierarchies were all but abolished at this point. Here they were, an asian, a black man and a redneck being led in by Mr. Justice himself. When she sat back and observed silently, it was almost a bad satire…almost.
"Yo Ajax, what's your story man?" T-Dog slapped her on the shoulder rather unceremoniously, but she contained her wince. She never had been comfortable with human contact, and PDA was out of the question entirely.
"Story?" She asked slowly, "What do you want to know?"
"Hell man, I don't know. Who are you looking for right now for starters?" Even though she knew the question would be asked eventually, she still felt the need to roll her eyes in frustration as it was brought up.
"My fiancé." Several heads turned back to gape at her oddly and she shrugged, "Is there something wrong with that?" She asked hotly.
"Hell no, I think it's great you have a dame. What does she look like?" T-Dog said after the initial shock wore off and they continued to silently trek.
Ajax reached into her pocket, feeling the picture tightly in her fingers while preparing to hear jeers about her own person that they were ignorant to—with the exception of Glenn, "Here, I keep that with me so don't get fingerprints on it."
T-Dog swiped it from her hand, letting out a low whistle, "Damn, you got yourself a nice piece of ass my man. This you standing with her?"
Ajax felt her lips twitch uncomfortably as she looked at James standing next to her in the photo. It had been a Christmas party at his office, and she had come in a red dress to match his tie. James was tall and lean, with a sharp face that went well with his angular nose. His eyes were pale blue under his hood of dark hair and she favoured his dimply smile every time he had gazed with longing at her, "Yeah, a Christmas party at my work."
"So are you really Ajax, or is it just a nickname then?" Rick asked as he was passed the photo. He handled it more gingerly and his eyes smiled more than his mouth when he looked at the happy couple, almost as if he was reminiscing something long passed in his mind.
"My name is James, or it was until I was with my group and everyone grew accustomed to Ajax." Her eyes surfaced the picture again as Rick passed it on to Glenn. Discreetly he gave her a knowing look in which she responded with a glare which he sensed through her dark shades.
"So why do you wear all this stuff?" Glenn began, smiling slightly as she seethed within herself. He didn't seem comfortable with her secret, and he made it a habit for her to try and come out with the truth, much to her chagrin.
"This is what I'm comfortable with. Do you ask for pure reason, or are you just curious to catch a glimpse at a man's face?" Glenn's cheeks grew hot while Daryl snorted, "If show and tell's over, I'd like my picture back now." She held out her hand for Glenn to return the photo, but Daryl snatched it from his hand before either party could make a grab.
"Yer broad looks like a skinny bitch. I doubt she's survivin' out there all alone." He commented as his eyes scanned over the photo once.
"Well." Ajax began while nearly laughing at the insult, "She can be a 'skinny bitch' sometimes, but I have no doubts that she is still alive."
"For real?" He asked mockingly while looking down at the picture once more. Ajax wasn't bothered by his assumption, after all, he probably wasn't used to women like her, and she certainly was no survivalist in her time growing up. They were foreign to each other, and she'd rather keep it that way.
"You'd be surprised at what feats she is capable of." With that final word, Daryl gave back the picture, and returned to his place at the front, slowly scoping ahead for walkers.
"What'd she do before all this?" Rick asked as he came up by her side. He was likeable as a person, and immediately she understood Glenns reverence for this man. He was capable of making wrong decisions like anyone, but was a rarity when he could admit it was the wrong choice. Ajax could hold him in worship easily enough, or at least as long as she was with this group.
"She was a nurse."
Rick hummed while Glenn was tossing more looks at the side of her head, "Damn shame she ain't with you. We could have used a medical hand."
Ajax was over swept with guilt, and she receded back into herself momentarily as she tried to fight off the shame and the bad taste it left in her mouth. She didn't know these people and she certainly didn't owe them anything, yet her good hearted streak that came along with the years in her career wouldn't relent in the fact that she was able to provide something for these people, yet she would withhold it from them for her own selfish reasons, "I know a few things thanks to her, so I might be able to help." She offered with a forced smile that was more of a grimace.
"And what did you do before all of this?" Glenn asked, frowning slightly in what she could only deduce as disappointment. It would not have been the first time she had let a person down.
"Uh, I was a Realtor."
Daryl laughed sardonically from ahead, "Real good. Have a live nurse out there waitin' and we get stuck with the house seller."
Ajax didn't respond, though she could have come up with something to insult his intelligence, but it wasn't worth the effort on her part. Life was too short to waste on Daryl Dixon, and she just didn't want to be the 'skinny bitch' that he assumed she was from the picture. Glenn floated back with her after everyone continued in a line where they were heading back to the truck they rode in on. He looked to be filled with questions, though she hardly thought she was capable of answering one at this point.
"So, I think you should just tell everyone." He said politely, with a touch of force.
"I'm not going to be around long enough for them to worry about it." She argued back.
He sighed while running a hand back through his hair, "Why won't you tell them the reason you're in disguise, they might be able to help you?"
"It isn't yours, or any of their burdens to bear. I don't have time to be attaching to a group for too long, I have to find James."
"And then what; you go back to surviving in this world just like the rest of us, only you would have given up a chance at staying secure in a group. How do you know he's alive anyways?!" T-Dog tossed a funny look back at them as Glenns voice had raised.
Ajax waited until he turned around before responding, "I'm driven by the same reasons Daryl searches for his brother." Ajax had walked with them long enough to catch the details of their story as to why they had been in Atlanta in the first place, and she had felt sick at listening to Rick explain why they had cuffed a living soul onto some cheap plumbing on a rooftop. It made it easier to brush off Daryl's temper as fueled rage from the situation with his brother, that and he looked naturally hardened by circumstances that he was unlikely to ever share with anyone.
"But, maybe we could aid you in your search." It was a feeble attempt of words, and even Glenn knew it as he grew sheepish.
"Glenn, I need you to stick with your group and do what you can to survive, you'll last longer that way." She started to move ahead in steps, creating distance in a gap that the young man seemed desperate to fill, "My journey isn't about survival anymore, it's about closure."
"So you're just waiting for the right time to die?" He asked incredulously.
"Well shoot Glenn, isn't everyone?" She didn't wait for his answer as he was left gaping at her with a blank stare. Her footsteps carried her near the front towards Rick and Daryl, neither whom were talking at the moment and that suited her just fine as she fell in line with them. She kept her eyes sharp, but spotted nothing in the bleak streets before them as they made their way slowly towards the edge of the city. Ajax hadn't left Atlanta in a while, mainly in the hopes that it would be easier to find James if he had stayed in one place. Now, when leaving the city, it opened up the world to her, and it was too big of place, diminishing her hopes to a thin thread that could be torn in two effortlessly.
"Ah Hell." T-Dog cursed as they came to a halt. Ajax was confused at first as she stared out at nothing before them, "Where's the truck?" He asked in a broken voice that was keeling over from exhaustion.
She understood then. The ride that they had parked with misplaced assurance was now taken from its waiting place. It was incredibly naïve for them to think the truck would remain in one spot after so long, but patterns were hard to break, even in the Apocalypse. Only the remnants of tire tracks in the dust remained, taking the air right from their lungs in a swift kick, "Merle." Daryl said tonelessly as he strode ahead in a few short paces. He looked back at the group, his crossbow slung over one shoulder and Ajax got a picture in her head that he was meant to survive in this world.
"Are you sure?" She asked, breaking ranks as she traveled down near him, "Keep in mind that there are other groups in Atlanta that may have found it."
Daryl was about to answer before T-Dog beat him to it, "Nah, Merle knew where we parked when we came to the city because he was with us last time."
"If it is him?" Rick started as he rubbed his stubble chin, "We can't be sure what he's gonna do."
"You assume he will go back to your camp?" Ajax concluded from the skepticism in his voice, "Do you think he is that vengeful a person?"
"Watch your mouth Canada, that's my brother your talkin' bout." Daryl snapped in her face, and she squinted her eyes.
"You misunderstand me. I actually find it unlikely he would return to the very same people who left him on a roof to die."
"We need to get moving." Rick interrupted, "If he is on his way back to camp, he's got a head start on us."
"A Hell of a head start." T-Dog said shaking his head, though freezing when he was cast a dark look by Dixon.
"Shane's there." Rick said reassuringly though Ajax was left to ponder who said person was, "If Merle does go back, he'll be able to handle anything he dishes out."
"Ain't gonna be dishin' out shit with one hand." Daryl snarled back. His eyes were darting back and forth between Rick and T-Dog, sneering at them both with all the rage he seemed to be able to conjure. His teeth would bear at them behind his cracking lips, almost to urge them on, though T-Dog seemed more bothered by it than Rick. It was probably getting on his last nerve too, but what can you say about the man, he was made of fucking steel and he wasn't about to snap at his companion, however reluctant Daryl was to be there in the first place. It was just another reason on the list as to why Rick Grimes, lawman, was a born leader.
They began to walk, after nothing else could be debated. Rick threw a glance at Ajax, and it seemed to her that he was signalling for her to go ahead with Daryl. She didn't want that responsibility, but Hell be damned if she was going to go back and discuss her situation with Glenn. Heaving a sigh, she adjusted her bag and rifle on her arm before going to join the surly redneck at the head. He didn't acknowledge her as she anticipated, and she made no effort to be the first to break silence either. They were burning daylight, and she tried to come up with what awaited them back at their camp. That they had lasted so long in an abandoned Quarry was nothing short of amazing, and she looked forward to being impressed by something in this world. She had almost forgotten the joy of what it was like to be settled in, and she'd take what she could get for however long it lasted.
"Sheriff's got you obeying orders already is he? Damn lightweight Canada." Ajax, having been so caught up in her thoughts, had almost forgotten Daryl walking next to her until he spoke. She stole a glance at him to find he wasn't looking at her, but straight ahead as usual.
"More like I was given an ultimatum. It was either you or Glenn, and you were the unlucky winner."
He sniffed, "Chinaman doesn't shut up. He'll give away our cover with that chitchat."
She simply nodded, deciding she suddenly had nothing else to say to someone like him. Traveling on the road with strangers, she assumed she would have grown accustomed to awkward silences, but they still nagged at her side as she was left with the feeling of having no social graces whatsoever.
"You don't talk much." He noted.
"No." She admitted frankly.
"Well good, cause I ain't one for listening. Damn people thinking they gotta share their problems with everyone." He grumbled more colorful words under his breath, one's too inaudible for her to catch.
"It's a wonder you've stayed with them this long." She felt his eyes turn in on her, but she never returned the look. His was smoldering with curiosity and its usual anger, a look she concluded he gave to everyone.
"You ain't gonna ask for my reasons?"
She hummed, "No, I don't really care."
"Well shit." He chortled, "I thought you Canadians' was supposed to be friendly."
"Where'd you here that?" He chuckled at her again, and she felt it bizarre that she was having a close to civil conversation with him after everything she had learnt about him in the past few hours. He was gruff and not the most polite candidate you'd take home to your parents, but he wasn't cruel either and that settled Ajax's nerves enough to not be so tense around him.
They settled into night, and T-Dog was handing out flashlights to illuminate a small line of light in their path. It was worse to travel in the late hours as it was more likely for something to sneak up on them. Anything that was bulbous and glowing could be mistaken for an eye, and it was a good idea to keep a look out for silvery skin tinted blue from death. The black blanketed over them, making it more impossible to see with each step as they entered a small brush of trees. Rick said the Quarry wasn't much further, and those were the lasts words of comfort spoken before they slipped into queer quiet. Every branch that crunched under their feet seemed louder than waves crashing on rocks. Ajax rider boots were flat bottomed with a square heel, making a lighter step. Her light weight may have had something to do with it, but so far none had commented about her petite size for a man. Daryl had wanted to, she saw the look in his eyes before the sun had gone down, but something held him back and she figured it was the reason that he didn't really care either.
"Oh shit, listen." T-Dog said while coming to a halt. Gunfire could be heard only a short distance away and the panic started to set in.
"Come on, we need to hurry." Rick said as he pushed his way to the front. Daryl had already started to run, and Ajax was following shortly behind when Rick caught up to her.
She dropped her duffle bag on the forest floor as she whipped out her rifle. There was no time to worry about her pack, and she knew she could always return for it later. A stream of fire light was visible through the trees, and she was third to break through after Daryl and Rick. The gunshots from before were being fired by an older gentlemen in a fishers hat, and a youthful man with full dark hair. The populous of the camp at first seemed startled by their sudden entrance, but it didn't stop Ajax from letting out rounds on the horde of walkers that were now entering from every corner of camp. Her bullets flew out silently in little wisps out from the suppressor. Glenn was the last to crest the hill after T-Dog, and his eyes were wide in horror.
"Glenn!" She yelled at him to free him of his stupor. He consciously ran to her as she passed him her Beretta, "Try not to waste bullets. Aim and fire at the head, or don't shoot at all." Something in him clicked and he joined in on the thrill of the slaughter as they came to help the other fighters in the camp.
Ajax was worried for the woman in the center, her body floated over a younger image of herself who was bleeding out from various bite marks in her flesh. The girl was as good of dead, but that was only easy to deduct from an outsiders point of view. If it was a family member, the woman would be on her own to deal with it. Ajax turned her gun back on two walkers that had crept out by the side of a tent abandoned in a small corner. A man was bashing in their skulls, but she fired a bullet into each head for good measure. The man spun around in surprise, and she nodded to him once as he smiled gratefully. He scrambled back to safety to a group of which she could only assume was his family, made up of two children and a wife.
Most of the walkers seemed to have been dealt with by now, and the initial panic was wearing off. Daryl and Rick had bounded in like white knights out of the crusades, and had taken to action before she could even take aim. Majority of the group was huddled around an old rustic looking RV that had passed its glory years. She felt sick with fear to see the children standing there with the adults in terror. Bite marks and bloodstains had rendered the camp into a frenzy of weeping women and shouting men. Innocent hands were clutching perilously to the clothes of mothers, who were attempting in vain to stay calm for their little ones. This wasn't a world they were meant to grow up in; it was all a sick fucking joke.
"Ajax, you good?" T-Dog asked from her side. He was breathing hard and was bent over at the knees.
"Yeah, I'm just fucking peachy. What about you?"
"Ah hell, those walkers will have to wait another day to taste dark meat." He forced a smile, one that she couldn't bring herself to return after the unfolding events. She looked down at her boots, finding them covered in lumps of stained flesh and bone that had splattered from the gunfire. The smell danced around her nose in a rancid odor that wouldn't wane and she pulled her scarf higher around her mouth to be able to breathe. The beads of sweat dripped down her forehead and she wiped them away on her gloved hand while chancing a look back out at the crowd. Rick was holding a woman with dark hair in his arms, and a boy with a patch of brown hair clung to his hip on the other side. A family man to boot, there was just nothing he couldn't accomplish it seemed and she was constantly amazed by the sight of him.
At her side T-Dog stood fully erect as he caught his breath, "This was supposed to be a safe place."
"Don't you know by now that nowhere is safe?" She huffed before walking away from him. The familiar sense of wanting to be alone weighted heavily upon her, and she walked passed the group, who was no doubt wondering about the new stranger who had helped them. She went back in search of her bag, but they all knew it was a fucking excuse. Hopelessness was a disease, and this group was rank with it. They had been so careful; taking every precaution to delude themselves into thinking they were safe. Ajax's group had done that as well, and their faces had been the very same as those children back there when the unity had become undone. They had gotten their senses knocked back into fucking motion, and now the stark realization that they had to get moving on was upon them.
She tore her hood down, and sat next to her bag on a log as she continued cursing under her breath. Footsteps made themselves present and she looked up to see Glenns unsure face looking at her as he scratched his head, "Hey, how are you doing?"
"Terrible." Her hollow voice answered, "You realize it's been over a year since I last saw my home. One year, and all because of the walkers. This fucking world. God doesn't have it in him to smite us all at once, he has to do it slowly?!" She kicked a rock under the toe of her boot, while Glenn took a tentative seat next to her.
"You know." He started, "The others wanted to meet their savior who helped them."
She scoffed, "I'm no more a savior then any of you…but thanks for the distraction." Her lips tugged up briefly.
He reached under the back of his shirt, and pulled out her gun that she had loaned to him in the commotion of the fight, "You'll want this back I guess."
She took it from him in her nimble fingers, and the weight felt strange in her palm, "If you need it again, don't hesitate to take it."
He nodded once, "Well, welcome to the group. I'll let them know you're coming. Daryl says we have a lot of clean-up to get through, but I think he does it to mellow out."
He's the smart one, she thought with a wry grin. Glenn disappeared back through the trees, but Ajax stayed immobile for a moment longer, enjoying the peace before she would be bombarded by more questions. How would she be able to look these people in the eye when she had seen the horrible truth? There was nothing else out there than what they hadn't already lost. She supposed some of them knew this, but it was never any easier to hear. She tucked her hair back into her hood with numb fingers and determination set in once again. This world may not be perfect, but they could make damn well sure that they would survive it. Her resolve was set and she stood resolute while slinging her pack back over her shoulder; it was time to meet the family.
We're nothing, and nothing will help us
Maybe we're lying,
then you better not stay
But we could be safer,
just for one day
Heroes, David Bowie
I'm surprised I can type this much so fast, but I was really eager to continue and I was glad that many of you have added it to your list already. I'm a slow person when it comes to character's plot being unveiled, so you'll have to keep reading if you want to find out more of the mysteries of Ajax. Leave a review and let me know what you think (also, I am still looking for a beta, so volunteer if you will!)