A.N. First of all, thank you so much to all those who reviewed and alerted the first chapter! You guys rock, seriously *sends virtual chocolate chip cookies to all* Here's the second chapter…another work written in one sitting out of a burst of inspiration, so if it doesn't make that much sense, then please do tell. Oh, and constructive criticism/reviews = love.
Also, just caught the Golden Globe nominations—congrats to Glee and the cast for getting four nods! They totally deserve it.
Disclaimer: Nope, don't own anything.
Jigsaw Pieces
Chapter Two
When Finn greets her with an easy smile the next day, it's almost too easy to forget everything that's happened (even just for a split-second.)
"Hello, Finn." She shuts her locker and returns his smile with one of her own, although she's aware her tone is somewhat wary. Their few conversations have lately had her feeling as if she's tiptoeing around broken glass, and with him so obviously distant and distracted, she knows better than to rock the boat.
"Hey." He's still smiling as he begins walking alongside her. The hallway's bustling with people as usual, but they both pay no mind to them. "So, uh…I didn't see you yesterday. I mean, I did, but after—you know--" he ends awkwardly as he shoves his hands in his pockets and Rachel thinks that Finn probably wouldn't appreciate being told that he hadn't found her because she was with his ex-best friend.
(She doesn't know what surprises or makes her feel guilty more: that she wants to be a friend to the person who impregnated the girlfriend of the boy she's in love with, or that it doesn't feel that much like betrayal.)
"I had to leave early," she explains, and this is one of the times she's thankful for being well-versed in the art of acting. Tucking a stray hair behind her ear, she deftly changes the subject. "So….how are you? We haven't really talked much in awhile."
"I'm good, you know, considering…" He shrugs and it's all very casual but even she can't miss the thinly-veiled sadness around him.
"I never wanted you to get hurt," she says honestly. "I just felt you needed to know the truth, but--"
"No, it was a good thing you told me. I mean, I just feel like such an idiot right now, you know? But at least I know everything; no more secrets, no more lies." Finn furrows his brow and idly Rachel wants to tell him that that'll give him frown lines but abruptly realizes that that's the least of his worries right now.
He nods his head repeatedly, and she's not sure whether he's trying to convince her or himself.
"Hey." He stops her suddenly and she meets his gaze. They're in the middle of the hallway and when he lays a hand on her shoulder, it's all kinds of cliché but she doesn't mind because she feels a thrill and this is how it's supposed to be.
"You've been a really great friend, Rachel," he tells her. The first warning bell begins to ring and he looks back for a split second before turning back to her. "I just wanted to say thanks for—well, just thanks." And with one last small smile he removes his hand and leaves her standing in the hallway by herself.
You've been a really great friend. It scares her how each day makes it look more and more like that's all she's ever going to be to him.
And now neither of us have him.
The thought passes through her mind and she can't explain why but she turns her head to the left. Turns her head and meets the eyes of Quinn Fabray, and the look on the girl's face tells her all too well that she'd seen them together.
They keep each other's gazes for a moment and it's almost like a silent understanding (of what, Rachel isn't sure), and at the same time, it isn't. Whatever it is, it makes her decide to just let it go, so she averts her eyes first and continues walking down the hallway. She leaves with her shoulder tingling from Finn's touch and her mind imprinted with Quinn's expression, a look she knows all too well to describe it as anything else: heartbreak.
She's the one who cheated on Finn. She's the one who lied.
It doesn't make her feel any better.
When Mr. Schue says, "Alright guys, I guess that's a wrap for today," she thinks she's never been more relieved to see Glee rehearsal end.
Ever since they won Sectionals, Glee has been the same, and at the same time, different. They sing and joke and chat but there's a tension that wasn't there before. And if there's one thing Rachel knows, it's that tension among members is not a good thing for any performance group.
Once she realizes she's alone, she walks to the piano. She'd asked Mr. Schue earlier if she could stay to practice more--after the events of the past few weeks and especially after the events of today, she wants to have one moment where she can sing her troubles away. She wants to feel like herself again, the driven, talented girl who'll one day defy gravity instead of the insecure, selfish girl that she's become, the one who helped break three hearts just by telling the truth.
Pressing the keys, she of course starts with some vocal exercises. That done, she begins to sing Barbra Streisand's "I'm the Greatest Star" to the empty choir room, actions and all (and she swears her motives are not purely narcissistic. She just happens to like Funny Girl, that's all.)
"I'm the greatest star. I am by far..."
"Really, Berry?" And just like that, the magic fades and she finds herself face to face with Noah, who's giving her a strange look, one eyebrow raised. "I knew you were crazy but I never pegged you for delusional too."
She chooses to ignore the jab. "What are you even doing back here?"
"Left my jacket," he says with a shrug as he goes to pick up said item. Slinging it over his shoulder, he nods at her. "I'm gonna go now, so you can get back to whatever the hell it is you were doing."
"I was projecting," she informs him primly with a huff. "Allowing oneself to perform actions and gestures whilst singing is an extremely helpful way to better express the message and emotion of the song."
He cracks a grin at that and she just knows that he's going to come up with another remark. "So that song's about someone who escaped from the psych ward? 'Cuz, you were jumping and looking crazier than usual---"
"Ugh," she exclaims, exasperated. "I know how much you value your reputation, but do you always have to be such a jerk all the time? Considering that I'm one of the very few people who are still willing to talk to you civilly, I'd have thought you'd at least show some semblance of appreciation."
His eyes narrow and suddenly, there's nothing teasing in them anymore. "Look, I never asked you to play nice with me, Berry. I don't know what your angle is, okay, but enough. I know you're giving Finn some space and shit, but that doesn't mean you can make me your little pity project in the meantime."
She shakes her head—this will no doubt take some explaining, and there's really no way to go about it but the truth. "But I'm not, I just—I may not approve of your choices but to some extent, I do understand how you're feeling. We both lost something we never really had in the first place."
He doesn't say anything and looks away and she wonders why he hasn't left yet. She wonders why she's fighting so hard for this, but as of the moment, it looks like there are just some questions that will be left unanswered. So they stand in silence.
It's him who breaks it first. "So, uh," he says, glancing at the clock. "What the hell are you still doing here, anyway?"
"Well, obviously, I'm here to practice. It never hurts to rehearse a little more than necessary. Besides, Daddy's going to run a bit late in picking me up today, so I decided to make good use of my time."
"Late? How late?" When she informs him, his eyes actually widen. "Dude, that's like, an hour and a half from now."
"I'm aware of that," she replies, fixing him with a look that she hopes conveys the message that she does not appreciate being called a dude. "I would leave earlier, but my fathers are still apprehensive about giving me my own car and anyway, it's not like I have friends or anyone really to catch a ride with," she adds matter-of-factly.
He nods and again, awkward silence steps in. Noah puts on his jacket and she's sure he's going to leave, when she hears him mutter something like, "probably gonna regret this" and he says out loud, "Hey, uh…do you want a ride home or something?"
The request is so random and sudden that for a moment, Rachel can't help but stare, eyes going wide (she'll remind herself later that it's probably not a good look to use when she's finally posing for photographs.) "A ride home with…with you?"
"Duh, Berry, do you see anyone else around here?" he asks impatiently.
"B-but…why?" She does believe that this is one of the rare moments that have rendered her almost speechless.
He rolls his eyes. "Because I'm probably turning out to be a masochist. Look, does it matter? I'm just offering—it's either a yes or a no. I don't really care either way."
The "yes" tumbles out of her lips before she can help herself.
"Okay." He sounds bored again, and he clearly doesn't realize how important this moment suddenly is. There may be some hope for him after all. "So, if you're done 'projecting' or whatever, grab your stuff so we can go."
This whole situation still feels somewhat surreal but she does what she's told for once and follows him out the choir room.
Nothing profound happens on the ride home. She gives him directions to her house, and they argue about the radio station ("Your taste in music is appalling; I mean, have you heard the lyrics to those songs of yours?" "Right back at 'ya, babe.") And when he pulls up in front of her house, she quietly unbuckles her seatbelt and gets out of the car.
"Thank you for driving me home," she tells him with a smile.
"Don't mention it. Seriously, don't," he grumbles, switching the radio station as he does so. "Just so we're clear, this is a one-time thing. This doesn't mean we're friends or anything, got it?"
"Of course," she hastily agrees. "Thanks again." As she starts walking to the front door she can hear his car drive away and this day is definitely another one she can add to her collection of extremely strange days: Having feelings for Finn but extending an olive branch to Noah, him driving her home…well at least, she figures that when the time comes, she'll have some pretty interesting material in her autobiography.
Maybe the truth is that they're more alike than she'd care to admit. Or maybe she feels a twisted sort of kinship with Noah because he's alone now, too. Whatever it is, there's no denying the realization that that car ride home is the least lonely she's felt in a long, long while.