My sheets were damp with sweat and when I opened my eyes, Sebastian's were looking down upon me. It was so sudden; his company startled me and I sat almost upright. I was leaning on my elbows which were on top of my pillow. "Se-Sebastian?" I whispered. I could see concern on his face through the candlelight and then his hand was revealed from the shadows. The white glove cupped my cheek and then pulled the hair away from my sticky forehead up to the top of my skull. His grip on my moonlit hair was firm but not painful.

Sebastian gently placed the candle on the bedside table as though it was something dear to him and his grasp on my hair softened. Then his attention was on me again. On his face grew a smile, a demon's smile. Using the hand around my hair, he pushed me down sideways onto the bed until he was completely on top of me. The chain from his pocket watch felt cool through my nightshirt. Sebastian lowered his body closer to my own and moved his arms – his left next to my head, just above my shoulder and lying against the sheets while his right was allowing the hand to start releasing the buttons on my shirt. "My Lord, you need comforting," he told me as his left hand stroked my temple. All I could do was watch while Sebastian covered my lips with his own. The kiss was plain and I didn't like it. Part of me wanted to push the demonic butler off my body while the other wanted to see where it would go. Worried that I would ruin whatever twisted relationship I had with the creature I seemed to love, I stayed still. Soon he stopped. I stared deeply into Sebastian's face and if he had a soul then I would have been able to see it, I'm sure. But then my cold stare turned into a pleading look. I was scared and he was right, I did need comfort. My eyes were crying out for help and I didn't know what to do. I think Sebastian saw that and he backed away a little, pausing, before coming close again.

I was scared to look into Sebastian's eyes. I kept thinking that there could be a chance that he could turn against me, just like that other butler. I diverted my attention to his lips instead; smooth and waiting. All thoughts of that other being left my mind completely. Sebastian Michaelis was the only thing I could focus on. I wanted him. Ha, now that I look back it seems silly that a sixteen year old had a desire to make love to his butler. "Sebastian please," I said quietly. At the sound of his name, the butler used his right hand to completely break open my nightshirt and exposed what was underneath – absolutely nothing. "I...I..."

Sebastian smirked and took my lips with his own. I closed my eyes and my body didn't protest in the slightest against his. The left hand grabbed a hold of my hair again and pulled it, which caused my mouth to open. It was a sneaky trick but wasn't against what I wanted. Sebastian slid his tongue against my gum and then the roof as his left hand pressed against my chest. I was surprised because it was bare. When did he remove his glove? I guess he is one Hell of a butler. Anyway, his palm brushed down past my abdomen and to the top of my thigh. Sebastian's ironically angelic fingers serenaded my member, causing it to go hard. When it got to his desired state, the fingers captured it and went wild. I moaned into the demon's mouth but he pushed his tongue further in. It was a moment full of pleasure. Wanting to give something back to him, I tangled my hands within the raven hair and made sure that Sebastian was as close as possible to my body. My tongue rubbed against his but then it snapped back. Damn, I thought to myself, Did I really just ejaculate?

I open my eyes slowly. The butler sat up with his legs still holding my thighs between them. Sebastian stared at me and licked his lips. His hand released my penis and appeared before his face. I watched the demon lick the thick substance from it, eyes glued to mine the whole time. Once he was satisfied, Sebastian lowered his head again and stopped just above my pelvis. The warm tongue traced my skin from my abdomen and up past my neck until he reached my lips. I received a small peck and then the demon raised his body and started to button up my nightshirt. "There you go, master," he simply said when he had completed the task and started to wrap my body in the sheets again. "Goodni-"

"Wait. Thank you, Sebastian."

"There is no need to thank me, my Lord. But try not to have another nightmare," Sebastian replied with a wink. He turned away from the bed and closed my bedroom door softly behind him, removing any form of light within.

I felt like I had been sleeping for just a few hours before I woke up. When I sat up to look down into the courtyard, it wasn't my room I had been asleep in. I was in my bed but I was in that forest from the nightmare before. There was that boy again...and the butler had just arrived, it seemed. I couldn't watch this again so I called out. "You there! Run! Escape these trees! He's going to kill you!" The blonde boy looked towards me as the gloved hands covered the skin on his face. I could only see his eyes. A spray of blood filled the air around the both of them and when it faded, I saw no life left in the icy blue irises. The butler dropped what was left of the boy's head onto the dry ground and turned towards me. His glasses did not slip when his head was down and examining the gloves he was wearing, which were now soaked in a crimson liquid. "Sebastian...SEBASTIAN!" I screamed, hoping that I would wake up or be saved in some way. But then he looked up. The butler was no longer wearing glasses; he was wearing a face that I knew. The face of my butler. Behind his back he revealed a lone silver butter knife. He raised it as he continued to approach my bed in which I could not move. Sebastian's face was smiling as he drew the knife back before launching it into my forehead.

Gasping, I clambered out of my bed. My legs were shaking and I was incredibly scared yet I needed to find him, find my butler. I ran as fast as my legs could carry me into the kitchen where I found him preparing lunch. He turned around to see who had entered, chopping knife in hand. "Oh, my Lord," he said, smiling, with a slight blush it seemed. "Sorry about breakfast, I didn't want to wake you after last night so lunch will be larger than usual. What can I offer you today?"

"Nothing. And I shall dress myself this morning." I replied bluntly.

The smile vanished from Sebastian's face and was replaced with a look of almost disappointment. "I see. Lady Elizabeth shall be arriving shortly at the manor for lunch. Please be in the dining room for one."

I nodded as I stepped out of the kitchen and closed the door silently behind me. The hallway was deserted and no sound was to be heard, strangely enough with those servants of mine. I made my way to the western part of the mansion to return to my bedroom. Was it a good idea to upset Sebastian? Or was he just making it seem like I had disappointed him? Damn him, confusing me like that. I am the master, he follows my commands. My bare feet against the burgundy carpets didn't feel the chills from the winter outside. I approached the mahogany brown double doors and pressed down one of the handles.

The room was empty, of course. I made my way over to my wardrobe and set of drawers. I quickly put on some underwear, navy socks, a white shirt and raven black shorts and blazer. A pair of glossy black shoes were against the wall and I slipped my feet into them. Across on the other side of the room was my mirror on top of a desk. I looked untidy but it was better than having Sebastian lay his hands on me. A very dark blue ribbon was located on top of that table and it matched my socks. I picked it up and the material that wasn't in my hand fell limp down my arm. "This is how Sebastian sees me. This piece of dead ribbon," I said to myself in a dark tone. I placed the ribbon underneath my collar and tied it around my neck. Hmm, still messy in the mirror but I didn't care. Elizabeth would have been tampering with my clothing anyway. I turned on my heel and left the room to head to the entrance of the manor.

I peered through the window and spied that no carriage was there so which meant that I was free from Elizabeth for a short while longer. As I glanced away from the transparent glass, the grandfather clock came into caught my eye. Five to one. Great. I walked swiftly into the dining room and planted myself into a deep ruby coloured chair. The door opened and a butler stood inside the frame; he grew closer. Sebastian placed two sets of cutlery on the table – one for my fiancé at the other end and the other beside my place mat. When he was done, he didn't leave but he remained at my side. "Forgive me, my Lord, but you are lacking your eye patch this morning," he informed me. I quickly looked up but I could only see pure white gloves reaching towards my face with a black object. This happened every morning but after last night's events within my head, I was terrified. I kept saying to myself, He's not going to do anything as Elizabeth is scheduled to be here any moment. A matter of seconds later, Sebastian backed away and I gazed into his face. "I'm sorry, sir."

"What for, Sebastian?" I replied.

"For upsetting you. I think I must have gotten too carried away last night as you seem disturbed this morning. I apologize." Sebastian bowed and left the room, allowing a teenage girl to enter.

"Ciel! It's almost been a month since I've seen you!" she exclaimed with a huge smile on her face. She bounced over towards my chair and pecked me on the cheek. "My, you do not look cute today!" She started to brush through my hair, trying to make it neater.

"Please, Elizabeth, sit down," I said bluntly.

"Okay..." and to my surprise, she did as she was told. Sebastian re-entered the room with plates of food. I couldn't concentrate on anything. Not on the food I was putting into my mouth, not on the words leaving Elizabeth's mouth. I could only paid attention to the demon butler waiting at the side, yet I nodded at the appropriate intervals so that I would get away with it.

Sebastian hadn't been looking at anything in particular but then he turned his direction to me. I stared at him, just like the night before. Suddenly, he approached me, locking his focus on my eyes. I was horrified, how could he do that with Elizabeth in the room? Then I realised that he had only come to collect my empty plate. He turned away from me and walked to the other end of the table, picking up Elizabeth's too before going back to the kitchen. My eyes followed his body as he left. Elizabeth's face appeared before mine, angry.

"Ciel! Look at me! This whole time your mind has been somewhere other than here! What is it? Normally you are distant but this is ridiculous! We're getting married, Ciel!" she screamed at me and then she made her way to my chair. "Tell me what is wrong! What have I done now?"

"Elizabeth, calm down. Your hair is getting messy," was all I could say. I wasn't lying; her blonde curly hair was falling out of its pigtail.

"You're one to talk! You look like you've just gotten out of bed! What kind of butler doesn't help his master in the morning? You're obviously thinking about him as you've only been looking at that man this whole time!" she continued to yell.

"Elizabeth..."

"What, Ciel? Don't you dare tell me that you've fallen in love with that butler! He looks like a ghost, he's that pale! And he's a man, Ciel, a MAN." I didn't say anything. I just turned my head away. "Are you being serious, Ciel? You can't even get married to him. What does that pasty, bony butler have that I don't!"

I stood up and Elizabeth took a step back. "Shut up! Don't talk about Sebastian in that way! At least he actually does as he is told which cannot be said about some people! He's a beautiful man and you're crazy for not seeing that."

"So you prefer him over me. A mere butler over your fiancé? Fine, Ciel. I'm leaving and I'm not coming back," Elizabeth lamented with tears in her eyes. She backed away and then charged out of the room.

Then there was nobody in the dining room except me. I was so confused. Did I love Sebastian or not? Was I scared of him or wasn't I? Was it a good idea to let Elizabeth go or did I regret it? I pushed the chairs over and swept the table arrangements onto the floor. I had almost destroyed the room when I looked up. Two ornamental swords which made an 'x' were hung upon the wall. I stepped towards them and took one down. It was quite heavy as I expected but it looked better on the wall, that was for sure. I brought my arm around the front of my body so that the blade was pointing at my stomach.

Three.

Two.

One.

I plunged the metal into my body and watched the blood sprinkle through the air as I pulled the blade out. "Urgh..ngh..." was all that I could say at that moment. The sword fell out of my hands and my back met the floor. I clutched the wound and felt as though it finally was my time to leave this world. I was dying.

"Ciel!"

I heard someone shout my name and their voice was so familiar yet I could not recognize it. It felt like hours before they finally came into my view. Sebastian was looking over me and it seemed that he had horror carved into his face. He crouched down next to me and pulled me into his chest, grabbing one of my bloody hands. "Why did you do this? Tell me why Ciel!"

"Sebastian, I was scared," I breathed.

"Scared of what?"

"Of you...I had another nightmare. You killed me and I did not understand why," I explained and my eyes welled up but I could still see my butler's shocked face. Sebastian removed the eye patch and threw it behind him, out of the way. "Nnnngh..."

"So that's why you were distant from me this morning. I should have done more to help. I am so sorry, Ciel," he said, pulling me in closer. Sebastian's hand lifted my face up to his but it was I that kissed him. His mouth was already partially open but it was enough to fit my tongue into. His tongue welcomed mine and he continued to pull me in closer and closer. But then my head fell back and the tears finally ran down my face. Sebastian placed his arm behind my head so that we could still look at each other. "Ciel. I love you. I'm so so sorry."

I managed to smile at him but I wasn't able to let him be aware of my reply.

My eyes closed and my free hand hit the floor. The last thing open to my eyes was Sebastian's perfect face staring down into mine. It may have been one painful way to die but it's over now.

Thank you, Sebastian. I love you too.