Thor blinked his eyes open as the light of a desert morning burned across his face. "Where am I?"
"Good morning, Brother," Loki answered. "You're on Midgard. Father banished you, remember? I told you; there was nothing you could do without defying Father. That it was madness. You went and defied him, and then spat in his face when you should have begged mercy."
"And what are you doing here?" Thor asked, brow furrowed. "Were you banished also? Will Lady Sif and the Warriors Three be joining us as well?"
"Knowing them, they'll probably ask to visit you at the very least. Whether Father allows it or not I do not know, but I think they will not be punished for simply following you," Loki answered, deftly avoiding answering about himself. "What do you remember of your arrival?"
Thor frowned. "I landed... against a strange carriage... there was a beautiful woman... I... appealed to Father and Heimdall to open the Bifrost... then... Ugh..."
Loki smirked. "Then you were struck down by a small weapon, yes?" he guessed. "It seems you didn't hit your head too badly then. Well, Miss Forster has offered you the only clothes she has that are likely to fit you, those of her former swain. The water in the basin is hot," he said with a gesture towards the mixing bowl he'd borrowed from the kitchen. He knew his brother wouldn't be able to handle the intricacies of a shower. An already run bath he could manage, but this was the desert. Baths were just wasteful. He'd have to make do. "Do try not to make a mess, Brother. I will await you outside."
Thor just nodded silently and set to his ablutions. Loki excused himself equally silently and was met in the hallway by the two astrophysicists and a college student.
"He's awake," Loki informed them. "He'll be out shortly, and hungry. I do apologise for the inconvenience."
"If either of you will give me answers, then I really don't mind," Jane answered. "Like, for example, now I have time to ask how you did... whatever it was you did to Darcy's taser."
"Magic," Loki answered with a cheeky smile.
"There's no such thing as magic," Erik asserted grumpily.
"Magic is just science that we don't understand yet," Jane countered. "Arthur C. Clarke."
"He wrote science fiction," Erik scolded.
"A precursor to science fact," Jane retorted.
"In some cases!" Erik asserted right back.
"Also known as speculative fiction," Loki inserted gently. "The ideas that led to experimentation, creation and finally knowledge that some things weren't as impossible as they were believed to be."
"So can I put on facebook that a god worked his magic on my taser last night?" Darcy asked with a saucy smile.
Loki grinned back. "God of Mischief, to be specific, and only if you friend me," he answered.
"No way. You're on facebook?!" Darcy asked, eyes wide as her smile grew.
Loki laughed. "I am in the habit of returning to Midgard every month or so, at least, and I always check my facebook when I'm here. Loki Odinson of Asgard."
"Awesome!"
Then the door behind Loki opened again, and Thor stepped out – carrying the t-shirt he'd been given rather than wearing it.
"Brother, put the shirt on. Do not prance around half-naked," Loki scolded absently.
"Are you that cut?" Darcy asked Loki, looking between the half-naked Thor and the fully dressed Loki.
Loki smirked. "Friend me on facebook and you'll be able to see pictures," he whispered into the brown curls by her ear.
Darcy smiled, blushed, and bit her lower lip.
"What is this?" Thor asked, indicating a sticker on the t-shirt.
"Oops," Jane said with an awkward expression as she ripped the sticker off. "My ex," she explained, with a self-depreciating smile and embarrassed laughter in her voice. "Good with patients, baaaad with relationships. They're the only clothes I had that would fit you."
"They will suffice," Thor stated. "Though I wonder at your attire, Brother. Garments that would fit my frame would ill fit yours."
"Father did not take my magic from me," Loki answered. "I styled my own garments to the fashions of Midgard."
Thor grunted and headed down the hall past him. "This mortal form has grown weak. I require sustenance."
"You're welcome," Jane quipped quietly to his back.
"Did I warn you that my elder brother is an arrogant, ungrateful toe-rag?" Loki asked quietly.
"You forgot to mention ungrateful," Darcy said. "But I guess it fits with the arrogant bit. And you told me, not Jane or Erik."
"Ah, then I apologise for the oversight," Loki said. "You can be grateful that he hasn't Volstagg's appetite at least," he added with a sigh. "And I can pay you back his expenses."
~oOo~
"How did you get inside that cloud?" Jane asked as they sat in a diner.
"Also, how could you eat an entire box of pop-tarts and still be this hungry?" Darcy added. It had been the last box of pop-tarts as well, which was why they were at the diner. Jane Foster, apparently, lived on pop-tarts and sugary cereal – the cereal box was in her van, and nearly empty as well, so they were out of food at the research hub.
There would be a grocery run performed at some point that day. Likely by Darcy. Interns got relegated tasks like that, especially when they were the only intern.
"Father didn't make him exactly human," Loki quipped. "Just mortal and powerless."
Thor completely ignored the talk – as he usually did when he was eating, unless he was the one talking, of course – and drained the coffee cup. "This drink, I like it," he announced through the food he was still chewing.
"I know, it's great, right?" Darcy said with a smile.
"Another!"
Loki closed his eyes with a groan as everyone else yelped in fright at Thor having thrown his cup down, smashing it. Just like he did in Asgard. With a wave of his hand, he fixed the cup.
"What was that?" Jane asked, shocked. Her question directed at Thor, rather than Loki.
"It was delicious, I want another," Thor answered simply, a smile on his face.
"You could have just said so," Jane said.
"I just did," he replied, his smile growing.
"No, I mean, ask, nicely," Jane corrected firmly.
"I meant no disrespect," Thor assured her.
"Alright, well, no more smashing," Jane scolded. "Deal?"
Thor was silent for perhaps a moment too long, or perhaps he was just chewing, but Loki was inclined to believe it wasn't that. Still, "You have my word," Thor agreed.
Loki wondered if that would carry over back to Asgard, if Thor ever was able to return. Certainly their mother would be thrilled to hear Thor wouldn't be destroying the goblets all the time any more.
"Good."
"Can you teach me to do that?" Darcy asked Loki quietly as she examined the cup Thor had smashed. It was whole, unbroken, and didn't even look like it had been smashed.
"I can teach," Loki answered her. "Whether you can learn is a different matter. Magic isn't an entirely learned thing, after all. There needs to be some affinity."
"And do I have any affinity?" Darcy pressed, clearly hopeful.
Loki narrowed his eyes at her, studying Darcy's aura. "A little," he decided. "Enough for simple things."
"That's enough for me then!" Darcy cheered.
"The usual please, Izzy," came from the door as two men entered.
"You missed all the excitement out at the crater," the second man said as they took their seats at the bar of the diner.
"Sayin' some kinda satellite landed out in the desert," his friend who'd ordered joined in.
"Yeah. We were havin' a good time with it, until the Fed's showed up."
"Excuse me," Jane said, turning in her seat. "Did you say there was a satellite crash?"
"Yeah," answered the man in the blue denim jacket.
"Oh my god," Darcy said with a slight groan as she pulled her phone out of her pocket and aimed the camera on it at Thor. "This is going on facebook. Smile."
Thor obligingly smiled. Close-mouthed, since he'd just shoved more egg in.
Loki leant his chin onto Darcy's shoulder.
"That's not facebook," he whispered into her curls.
Darcy smiled and clicked over on her phone. "I'd forgotten my other job. I'll explain later," she typed up so that Loki could see.
Loki smirked.
"What did it look like, this satellite?" Erik asked.
"Well, I don't know anything about satellites," the guy in the denim jacket answered honestly, "but, it was heavy. Nobody could lift it."
Thor almost immediately set his cutlery down and got out of his chair.
Loki covered his eyes. "A challenge," he sighed in resignation. "And he's probably figured out that it's Mjolnir," he added with a shake of his head as he dragged his hand down his face and returned to his meal, ignoring his brother who was getting directions to the crater.
Jane and Erik both followed after him. Well, Jane followed Thor, Erik followed Jane.
Darcy stayed with Loki at the diner.
"Tell me now?" Loki asked with a smile.
Darcy grinned back. "There's a reason why a poli-sci major was the only applicant to Dr Foster's intern-ship. In exchange for getting all my student loans paid, I report to a group called 'Shield'. Um... it's an acronym... stands for... Strategic Hazard Intervention Espionage Logistics Division," Darcy explained. "I sent a text already about the 'probably Mjolnir' while Jane was driving us back to base last night, and let them know that two extra-terrestrials were staying with us, but I should have sent pictures as well. I, uh, got distracted by..."
"How cut my brother is?" Loki suggested.
"And how green your eyes are," Darcy added with a smile. "Come on," she said, getting up from the table. "I want to see the pictures of you on facebook. It's not fair that I've only seen one of you without your shirt on. I can't make proper comparisons, and my phone's screen is way too tiny."
Loki chuckled and rose as well, quickly stacking the used plates and leaving a tip for Izzy. Any one who could put up with Thor in their diner deserved a tip. He'd been banned from the kitchen since he was young after all, and never allowed back. The golden boy Thor may have been, but the cook refused to have warriors in her domain. Let them wait for the food to be served at the tables.
~oOo~
They arrived back at Jane's research centre a mere two steps behind the woman in question. The woman in question had a question of her own.
"What the hell is going on here?" she demanded.
"Miss Foster, I'm Agent Coulson, with Shield," answered a suited, balding man as his many minions around the building were packing up Jane's equipment and research.
"Is that supposed to mean something to me?" Jane asked, on her way to either righteous fury or hysteria. "You can't do this!"
Agent Coulson just smiled pleasantly while Erik whispered to Jane.
"Let it go?!" she demanded harshly as she pushed past the older man. "This is my life."
"We're investigating a security threat," Agent Coulson informed her. "We need to appropriate your records and all your atmospheric data."
"By 'appropriate' do you mean 'steal'?" she demanded.
"Here," Agent Coulson said, offering her a piece of paper. "This should more than compensate you for your trouble."
"I can't just buy replacements at RadioShack," she answered as she snatched the cheque from him angrily and scrunched it up. "I made most of this equipment myself."
"Then I'm sure you can do it again," Agent Coulson said, his voice calm and reasonable.
"And I'm sure I can sue you for violating my constitutional rights!"
"I'm sorry, Miss Foster, but we're the good-guys," Agent Coulson said, and he even sounded like he was sorry.
"So are we!" Jane said desperately. "I'm on the verge of understanding something extraordinary, and everything I know about this phenomenon is either in this lab or in this book, and you can't just take this awa– hey!" she objected as another suited agent took the book from her hand and set it in the truck they were loading all her equipment into.
"Shouldn't have mentioned the book," Loki said lowly.
"Duh," Darcy agreed softly.
"Thank you for your co-operation," Agent Coulson said as truck doors were being shut and other agents were getting into cars and driving off.
Darcy wrapped comforting arms around Jane, and Loki admitted to himself that he was impressed with how consoling the girl could be when she had been spying for the organisation that had just announced their confiscation of all of Miss Foster's work and equipment.
~oOo~
They retreated to the roof to look out over the town and lament the losses of the day.
"Years of research, gone," Jane said with angry despondency.
"They even took my ipod," Darcy added.
"What about the back-ups?" Erik asked.
"They took our back-ups," Jane answered. "They took our back-ups of our back-ups. They were extremely thorough," she complained.
"I just downloaded, like, thirty songs on there," Darcy said.
"Could you, please, stop with your ipod?" Jane snapped. "Who are these people?"
"I knew this scientist," Erik offered, "a pioneer in gamma radiation. Shield showed up and, uh, he wasn't heard from again."
"They're not going to do that to us," Jane insisted. "I'm gonna get everything back."
"Let me contact one of my colleagues," Erik suggested. "He's had some dealings with these people before. I'll email him, and... maybe he can help..."
"They took your laptop too," Darcy informed him kindly.
Loki sighed, then blinked as he saw a figure approaching. "It can't be," he breathed.
"Loki?" Darcy asked.
He blinked. "It's... my mother," he answered, and scrambled to his feet so that he could magic himself down to her.
"Can I meet her?" Darcy asked, also climbing to her feet.
Loki smiled and wrapped an arm around the girl before teleporting down. "Mother," he greeted, and held out his arms for her embrace. She did not disappoint, gladly holding him. "What are you doing here?"
"Delivering a message," she answered. "Your father has fallen into the Odinsleep."
"You have come to collect Thor back to Asgard," Loki said, releasing his hold on her and stepping back away.
Frigga shook her head. "No," she answered. "Thor was banished, and though it pains my heart, your father did a wise thing. Thor has much to learn before he may rule Asgard. I came," she said, and took a deep, steeling breath, "to ask if you would take the throne while your father sleeps."
Loki blinked in shock. "Me?" he asked. "A Jotun? On the throne of Asgard?"
"Oh Loki," Frigga breathed, tears gathering in her eyes. "You are our son, my son. An heir to the throne of Asgard just as surely as Thor. It would be your place now, if you will accept it."
Loki shook his head. "I never wanted to be king," he answered her. "I knew Thor was not ready to be king, but I did not want to take his place."
Frigga nodded. "Then I will return to Asgard at once," she said, and began to turn back to the Bifrost site.
"You will not even see Thor?" Loki asked, surprised, stalling her.
Frigga shook her head. "It is too painful," she answered him sadly. "I could not bear to look at him until he has proven himself worthy to return home. But you are here by choice, my Loki, so I had to ask you."
"I understand, Mother," Loki said.
"Loki?" Darcy asked quietly.
"Oh, forgive my manners. Mother, this is the Lady Darcy Lewis, she has become a friend already in my time on Midgard," Loki introduced with a smile. Darcy had managed to 'friend' him on facebook before the agents had taken everything away. Being their little spy probably helped with that actually. More than that though, she really was more interested in what he had to say than whatever Thor was up to. "Lady Darcy, this is my mother, Frigga, Queen of Asgard."
Darcy, in her leggings and mini-skirt, did as best a curtsey as she could.
"I thank you, Lady Darcy, for being a friend to my son Loki. He hasn't enough friends who understand and appreciate his value," Frigga said with a smile.
"He's a great guy," Darcy said, a slight blush on her cheeks. "I'm more than happy to count him a friend."
"Perhaps," Frigga said, looking between the two, "when you come back to Asgard, my son, you will bring the Lady Darcy?"
"Perhaps," Loki agreed non-committally, a slight smile on his features.