A/N: Nine reviews, wow thanks here's what you guys wanted sorry for the grammar I hope it's not that bad.

Lily felt sticky and wet. What was this thing all over her body? It's red and thick. There's a body underneath her, what's going on?

Lily's mind caught up to her quickly. Looking at her dress she saw that the sticky wet stuff was blood, blood from the body beneath her. Harry. Her baby shot himself, and because of her tackle it hit him not in the heart but in the center of his chest.

It came from the back of Lily's throat, and she already knew it was coming. A scream pierced the entire neighborhood, a heartbroken scream, and one speaking of despair. Wasting no time Lily picked the body of her son up and ran through the floo and shouted " ST. MUNGOS!"

By the time Lily got there she was covered in blood, soaking right through her dress. "HELP! HELP ME PLEASE MY SON IS DIEING!" Lily being in such a state of distress didn't realize one thing.

Harry stopped breathing.

Healers swarmed Lily almost at once. They took Harry from her arms and rushed him over to the E.R. Lily tried to follow but she was held back from all the nurses. "IM A HEALER I CAN HELP!" Lily frantically screamed at all the nurses holding her back. "Sorry, Mrs. Potter you need to calm down please sit here and wait for news on your sons condition. Lily being in a state of distress didn't even here the use of her previous name.

Wracked with sobs Lily sat in the waiting room for her son. How could she let someone so precious slip through her fingers like that? Her precious little angel. The one she knew she would give anything up for, yet why didn't she let go of Severus? As Lily sat there she reminisced on all the time she spent with Harry before Snape came into the picture.

*Flashback*

Baby Harry two years old

Lily walked across the hall of her condo to Harry's room. She lived in a condo instead of Potter mansion because of the many memories it brought up for her.

"Mumma!" Harry's insistent calling was heard around the house everywhere.

When she reached his room she was greeted with the sight of emerald eyed chubby baby that had the most unruly hair, like her late husband. James. The thought of him almost made her burst into tears. 'No', Lily told herself. She would not do that her son.

As if knowing her distress, Harry jumped out of his little bed and wrapped Lily in a hug. "Aw Ywou awight mumma?" Harry asked his green eyes looking into Lily's own. Lily's heart burst with love for her child. How can such a sweet little boy be all hers? Lily asked herself this everyday; after all it was through this child that gave her a reason to live on.

With a wide smile, Lily picked Harry up placed a loving kiss on his lips. "Yes, I am my little green eyed angel, now how 'bout we get some breakfast." Harry giggled at his mommy, he loved her so much, and that just being in her made him happy.

"Yes, pwease mumma"

The two of them walked to the little kitchen, leaving Lily with her last thought 'I'm not going to lose you too baby, because mommy loves you.'

*End Flashback*

'Where were those times now?' Lily thought despairingly, head in her hands. Where is the conviction she had for her one and only child? She made a promise to herself to never lose her baby and he…he took his own life.

The distraught mother didn't even know how he knew of muggle guns, or suicide. Who gave her child information about things like that? Then there was her soon-to-be ex-husband. What else has he done to her angel that she doesn't know about? The child that always looked to her in his pain, how did she lose sight of what was truly important?

Thinking of this brought back old memories of time she would be there for him;

*Flashback*

Harry 4 years old

Lily was rushing home from her job, to get back to her baby that she left with Padfoot. Sure she knew that she had nothing to worry about because Padfoot was watching him and would rather die than let harm come to him, but then that just made her worry more because it was Padfoot. She knew how irresponsible he could be sometimes. What spiked her ire, was that it was pouring with rain, of which was causing more and more traffic of people.

…...

By the time Lily got home it was a quarter to ten; the rain hadn't stopped, only increased with an addition to thunder. Lily flipped the switch and her entire house became illuminated.

There sleeping on her sofa was Sirius, so her son must be in his room. Walking into the hallway toward her son's room, Lily felt dread, something she hasn't felt since that night on Halloween. She didn't know why she did at the time when she was walking down the hallway, but once she reached Harry's room she knew why she felt that way. Harry wasn't in his room.

Immediately at panic, Lily searches everywhere in her son's room for him. Did someone take her angel when she was gone? What was Sirius doing? Lily couldn't stop all the possibilities that filled her head about her son in the worst-case scenarios. Death eaters, kidnapper, murderer, her son could be anywhere with anyone and she doesn't know.

In the midst of her search thunder roared through the house with lightning following soon after. And that's when she heard it, a faint a muffled cry coming from her room.

Not wasting any time at all Lily ran to her room and started searching for her son. First she checked her bathroom that was connected to her room, then under her bed. The thunder started getting louder, so much so that it started shaking the condo. And as the thunder got louder she found her son. In the closet.

Cautiously opening the door, Lily looked inside and saw her four year-old son hiding under all her clothes shivering; face red and puffy from crying. 'Of course' Lily thought. 'He's afraid of thunder'. Moving her clothes aside Lily gathered Harry into her arms and held him tightly against her own body in the closet.

"Shhh, baby mummys here, mummys her" Lily cooed. "Mu- um-my" Harry sniffled trying to calm his erratic breathing. " Yes baby it's okay I got you, I got you". "Don't- go –mu-mmy." That thought hadn't even crossed Lily's mind. " Mummy's not going anywhere, my love" "Pwromise-ss"" Mummy promises she'll never leave you behind"

"Love you Mummy"

"Love you, too"

For the rest of the night Lily and Harry stayed in the closet in a tight embrace. That is until Sirius found them.

"Lils, what are you doing in a closet?" Sirius questioned in concern. Followed by "I'm hungry, let's eat." Lily cracked a smile. Padfoot wouldn't be Padfoot if he didn't have his concern for others mixed with his concern for his stomach.

*End Flashback*

If- no, When her son got through this she would fix everything, do anything in her power to bring her baby back into her life, beginning with Snape. 'How dare he harm my son', Lily thought with motherly fury.

A hand on her shoulder broke Lily out of her thoughts.

"Lils."

Lily turned around and was brought face to face with Remus Lupin and Sirius Black. Men she hasn't seen in two years. Yet another thing she had screwed up. When Snape came into the picture he didn't want the two who had tormented through his years at Hogwarts to be around, so she forbade them from ever coming around.

Poor Harry had been devastated to hear that his uncle moony and uncle paddy wouldn't be coming around anymore. He cried for weeks on end, and Lily had done nothing about it, too blinded by the filling in her heart that Snape provided

Lily looked into the eyes of her late husbands oldest and best of friends straightforward. And instead of saying anything, they wrapped Lily in a tight embrace. Judging by the blood on Lily's shirt they knew she was going through an inner turmoil at the thought of Harry.

"I'm s-o-o sor-ry Re-mus, Siri-us I di-dn't mean to push y-o-u aw-ay like I had t-wo years ago" Lily's sobs muffling all her sentences. "I kn-ow i-m a horr-ible mum-" Sirius stopped her right then and there.

"Lils stop doing this to yourself, you were hurting and you needed to fill that void that James left behind." Sirius sternly told her.

Lily looked at him with red eyes. "HURTING! I thought the void James left behind was hurt that was what I felt when he was gone." Lily chuckled a distressed laugh. "I am nowhere near hurting now Sirius" she took a breath that stuttered a little. "No you see what I'm feeling is excruciating pain, my son is in the emergency room , probably dying because he committed suicide at the age of 8"

" I do blame myself, because I went for two years bypassing the pain my son was in and never once sought to give him what he needs. And if he dies I'll make sure I go with him!" Lily poured her heart out.

Just then a healer came out of the E.R.

"Are you the mother of Harry James Potter?" he asked.

This is it. The moment of truth.

"We have good news, bad news and a few questions about your son"

Blood is pumping in her ears now, what's the news!

"Good news is your son will live"

But he also said there was bad news, don't get too excited.

"Bad news is; he has major blood loss, broken jaw, bruised rib cage, and minor damage to his head"' When I tackled him must of caused some damage' Lily thought.

As long as he lives the world hasn't ended yet.

"But he has now fallen into a deep coma, we have no idea when he will awake"

The she'll wait for him.

"Now for the questions; have you ever seen anyone do or have you committed physical or sexual abuse to your son"

No! He wouldn't. Not her baby!

...And the world came crashing down before the eyes of Lily Evans.

A/N: Continue or no continue let me know!