Chapter 2 – Die Another Day
"I'm gonna break the cycle, I'm gonna shake up the system
I'm gonna destroy my ego, I'm gonna close my body now
I think I'll find another way, there's so much more to know
I guess I'll die another day, it's not my time to go
For every sin, I'll have to pay, I've come to work, I've come to play
I think I'll find another way, it's not my time to go
I'm gonna avoid the cliché, I'm gonna suspend my senses
I'm gonna delay my pleasure, I'm gonna close my body now
I guess, die another day, I guess I'll die another day
I guess, die another day, I guess I'll die another day
I think I'll find another way, there's so much more to know
I guess I'll die another day, it's not my time to go"
Die Another Day by Madonna
Josie felt the cold stones pressed against her back as her hot blood poured out of her. The archdemon roared above her, but she had no strength to fight anymore, she had no strength to even care. Her vision began to blur as Alistair's image came to the forefront of her mind.
"Well Love, looks like you are about to get your wish, I'm dying," Josie moaned.
"Heal her, mage. I can't do this on my own." She heard Loghain order.
Josie felt Wynne's caring hand gently touch her arm. "Josie, stay with me. It's going to be alright."
How in the Maker's name could she say that? Everything was far from alright! Nothing would ever be alright again!
Josie felt the warm tingle of healing magic course through her as the skin on her neck and chest began to knit back together, but Josie knew that Wynne was struggling to stem the flow of blood and the more it poured onto the cobblestone the more Josie's will to live diminished. Josie closed her eyes and she felt like she was floating on air. The pain was now distant, the noise muffled and she saw a bright light getting closer, drawing her in. For the first time in weeks she felt at peace, until a firm grip tightened around her shoulders, shaking her awake. Her eyes fluttered open and she stared into the furious gaze of Zevran.
"Don't you leave me! Do you hear me, Josie? Don't you dare fucking leave me! You need to fight! Fight with all that you have!" He demanded of her and she did because if there was one person she didn't want to leave it was her best friend.
Wynne cursed under her breath, a rare occurrence for the mage, as she demanded a bottle of lyrium. Seconds later she again felt the healing magic course through her and this time she felt it stay, not flow back out, but take hold and mend her body together.
"I can't hold them off much longer. How long?" Loghain demanded.
"Just a few more minutes," Wynne stated.
"Woman, take a look around you. All hell is breaking loose, we'll be lucky to have a few seconds. I need her now!"
Josie weakly struggled upward and rested on her elbows. "Loghain, stop ordering Wynne around and get those men back on the ballistae," Josie commanded.
Loghain glared at her, gave a curt nod, then began barking orders. The healing magic continued to wash over her and in a matter of minutes she was able to get to her feet with Zevran's assistance. The archdemon roared in pain as it staggered under the barrage of wounds that was being inflicted upon it and then it collapsed, alive, but severely injured.
This was it, it was now or never. Josie looked around and saw a sword protruding out of a body. Without thinking, without hesitation, she charged for the blade. She heard Zevran's voice yelling for her, but she rushed forward, ripped the sword out of the body and continued to surge forward toward the demon. She screamed as she slid on her knees under the beast, burying the blade deep and slicing down its underside. The beast howled in agony as Josie slid to a stop and staggered to her feet.
Both the beast and Warden were drawing in raspy breaths as Josie let out one last warrior cry and drove the blade into Urthemiel's heart. The archdemon bellowed loudly then collapsed as a bright light shot from him, lifting Josie off her feet and upwards. She felt agonizing heat score through her body, setting her blood on fire and a voice boomed in her head.
"You are mine, I am yours, your powers are my powers and my powers are yours!"
Then a force stronger than anything she had ever felt blew her back against the stone wall and everything went black.
Josie jolted awake from the sound of a screaming voice, only to realize it was her screams that had woken her. Her door burst open and the silhouette of a man framed the doorway.
"J-josie… Commander," a breathless Anders called out. "Are you okay?"
"Yes… I'm f-fine," Josie stuttered as the mage advanced toward her. She inhaled deeply when she realized he was shirtless. She looked down at her exposed breasts and pulled the covers up around her neck.
"I heard you screaming," Anders said as he sat down on the edge of the bed. His eyes roamed over her bare shoulders.
"Nightmare," she murmured, unable to take her eyes off of his sculpted chest. How did a mage get a chest like that?
"That didn't sound like a typical Warden nightmare."
"It isn't. It's reserved for the privileged few that have killed an archdemon and lived to dream about it."
Anders reached out and took her hand in his. His thumb gently caressed the top of her hand sending shivers down her spine. "And how many have lived to dream about it?"
"Just me, I'm an anomaly."
"No other Warden has ever lived after killing an archdemon? That's amazing."
"Oh yes, Weisshaupt finds me very perplexing," Josie replied. She was not about to tell anyone about the Dark Ritual. As far as Weisshaupt was concerned, Josie was just as shocked to be alive as they were to have her alive.
"Do you have these nightmares often?"
"Yes…they were supposed to go away when the Blight ended, but they haven't. Another thing that makes me the exception to the rule," Josie said.
"I get the feeling that a woman such as yourself is used to bending the rules," Anders said with a smile so tender it melted her heart. His warm gaze made her want to lean into to him, to take comfort in him. There was something vaguely familiar about him... sitting here in the dark, listening to him speak... his voice was mesmerizing, drawing her in, but she fought her primal urge.
Anders was dangerous. Not to her physical being, but to her mental and emotional one. He was charming, alluring and there was some kind of weird sexual chemistry going on between them that was drawing her to him, but she could never act on it. And not just because she was his Commanding Officer, but because she was damaged… damaged beyond repair and she would be no good for him.
She withdrew her hand from his and leaned back against her pillows that were propped up against the wall. Anders took this as his queue that their conversation was over and he stood up to leave. He smiled warmly down at her again making her ache to be held by him.
"Well, my room is right next door. As a matter of fact my bed is up against the same wall as yours," Anders stated. Josie turned around and glanced at the wall. Well, that couldn't be a good thing.
"The walls in this Keep are surprisingly thin. That is how your screaming woke me up. So if you ever need anything… anything at all, I'm just a knock away," Anders said as a clever grin played on his lips.
Josie felt her cheeks flush as she made a mental note to be extra quiet during private time.
"I'll be fine, but thanks for the offer," she said coolly.
Anders nodded as he continued to grin at her then he turned and left her room, closing the door behind him. Josie slid underneath the covers and tried not think about Anders close proximity to her bed.
xxXxx
Josie had realized a long time ago that if you wanted something done right you had to do it yourself. After being sent on a wild goose chase by Anders's friendNamaya and nearly killed by that unstable Templar Rylock while trying to recover Anders' phylactery, Josie knew it was time to take things into her own hands. So here she was in a back room at the Randy Stag with Anders leaning back on the bed as his eyes roamed her body, making her flesh heat up and her stomach flip.
"You know Sweetheart, if you wanted to get me into bed there are less expensive ways of doing it?"
"Keep your knickers on, Loverboy. We may be here for you, but I'm not here for you."
"Oh really, then why choose a brothel for this meeting? Why not some sleazy bar down by the docks? I believe it's because you want to make me your dirty little secret."
Josie rolled her eyes. "Do women really drop their panties for you with cheesy lines like that?"
Anders eyes darkened as a sly grin spread across his face. "No, it's my many other talents that have them lifting their skirts for me."
Before Josie could reply there was a knock at the door. Josie gripped the pommel of her sword as she walked over to the door. "Who is it?"
"It's me, Commander."
Josie opened the door and Ser Cullen walked in. He was wearing civilian clothes and Josie had to admit that out of his Templar uniform he was an impressive and very handsome man.
"It's good to see you again, Josie," Cullen said as he stepped into the room, closed the door behind him and then embraced her.
"You are looking well, Cullen…"
"A bloody Templar! You brought a bloody Templar! This is your brilliant plan," Anders shouted as he leapt to his feet.
Josie spun as she reigned in her anger. "Warden Anders, shut up, sit down and learn a thing or two or you can leave this room immediately."
Anders staggered back a little under the weight of her stare, but he took a seat back on the bed.
"I'm sorry about that Cullen, but you can understand my Warden's uneasiness about asking a Templar for help."
Cullen looked over her shoulder at Anders and smiled. "Especially that particular Warden, Anders was never on good terms with the Circle."
"So you can see why I need to get my hands on his phylactery. I have already had to deal with one rogue Templar that came after him. I need to be able to protect him from other templars that might have a vendetta against him."
"You are good to your Wardens, Commander and if I hadn't already taken my vows I would have loved to serve under you," Cullen said.
"Yeah, I'm sure he would," Anders muttered sarcastically.
Ignoring the mage behind them, Cullen continued. "Your information wasn't entirely inaccurate. Anders phylactery is here in Amaranthine. The Circle moved it here during the Blight and they have yet to move them back to the tower. It's in a warehouse down by the docks. I wrote the address down for you."
Cullen handed Josie a piece of paper and she looked at the address then threw it into the fire. "Thank you, Cullen. I really appreciate your help."
"Anything for you, Josie, you saved my life and your advice and counsel saved my soul."
"We all feel lost at times, Cullen. I'm glad I was there to help you through a very difficult time in your life and if I recall I wasn't the only one doing the saving," Josie said with sly smile.
Cullen chuckled. "Yes, I believed we saved each other."
"I'm sorry to cut this short, but I do believe I have date with a warehouse tonight."
"Be careful, Josie. There won't be many guards because they won't want to draw attention to themselves, but there will be a few Templars there, so you may want to take someone other than a mage as backup."
"Thank you for the warning. The room is yours for the night, Cullen and I do believe Madame Katrina has a lovely beauty picked out of you."
Cullen blushed that shy Templar blush that Josie knew so well and pain shot through her heart.
"You didn't have to do that, Josie."
Josie hugged him as she chuckled. "If I recall, all work and no play, makes Cullen a very dull boy."
He returned the hug. "Thanks and take care, Josie."
He pulled away and nodded his head towards Anders. "And be careful of that one, he has quite the reputation as being a notorious playboy."
"Aaah, glad to see my status as an outstanding lover has made to it to the attention of the Templars," Anders stated.
"I didn't use the word outstanding," Cullen corrected as he pulled Josie to the side and out of Anders earshot.
"Josie, I know that you have been through a lot recently and for that reason I must warn you. Anders is charming and charismatic. It's what makes him so alluring, but I've never seen or heard of him staying with one person for very long. I worry that if you were to become involved with him, he will only break your heart."
"Thank you, Cullen for your concern, but I have no intention of becoming involved with someone under my command. My concern for his phylactery is because I don't want him looking over his shoulder for Templars every time we leave the Keep."
"As a friend, I just thought I should warn you."
"And I appreciate it. Take care."
"You too, Josie."
They headed out into the dark alley toward the docks. "I can't believe that you are working with Templars, Commander."
Josie spun on her heels to face him. "I will work with anyone that will further my cause. That is something you need to learn and accept about me. And if Cullen's information is correct then that Templar just helped us obtain your phylactery. You should be grateful."
"Grateful? I should be grateful to get back something that they had no right to take in the first place?"
"Yes, because Cullen isn't the person that took your blood, but he is the one helping you get it back," Josie replied.
"So what was that bit about you saving his life and soul? That was a just a little over the top and that's saying something coming from me."
"When the tower fell, the mages held him in a prison where desire demons tempted in all manners. He had managed to fend them off, but by the time that I had got to him his strength was weaning. Once I defeated Uldred the prison broke, but the mental damage had been done. The next time I saw him was in Denerim at that celebration and the man was at a serious crossroads both spiritually and emotionally. After saving his life he trusted me and he confided in me. I helped him past that rough time in his life."
"When you say helped,did that help include him sleeping with you?"
"You know Anders, a man and a woman can be just friends without sleeping together."
"No they can't… well maybe a woman can, but a man can't if he finds a woman attractive. If the man is a heterosexual and he finds a woman attractive he may pretend to be her friend, but he is always thinking about what it would be like to sleep with her. But you avoided my question, did you sleep with him?"
"My sex life is none of your business."
Anders grinned at her. "So you did sleep with him."
"Look, Cullen is a good man, a good Templar who is trying to help you," Josie retorted.
"No, he is trying to help himself back into your panties by helping me in order to impress you," Anders countered.
"Not everyone has ulterior motives, Anders. I'm helping you and I have no desire to get into your smalls."
He grinned at her. "Oh really? So why were your eyes wondering over my bare chest that night I woke you from a nightmare?"
"I can admire beauty without indulging in it," Josie replied nonchalantly.
He continued to smile at her. "You think I'm beautiful?"
"You know you're gorgeous and you don't need me to tell you that."
"I might not need you to tell me, but it feels good hearing it from your lips," Anders purred.
They stood at the entrance to the alley that housed the warehouse. Josie paused and turned to him. "You know what else feels good," she purred as she stared up into his big honey brown eyes.
Anders unconsciously licked his lips as he began to lean into her. "No, tell me," he said breathlessly.
"Inflicting pain on a few Templars. Now, just follow my lead and don't ask any questions. Let's just take a leisurely stroll down this alley so I can survey the place," Josie purred.
"I love the way you say, 'inflicting pain on a few templars'. Makes me all warm and tingly inside," Anders said as she slid her arm through his and the two of them walked into the alley.
As they neared the address of the warehouse, Josie could see one guard standing outside the door. He immediately became alert as he watched them approach.
Josie stumbled and Anders grabbed her arm to steady her. His eyes furrowed as he looked at her. "Are you okay?" He whispered.
She giggled and slapped his arm. "A-anders you're so bad," she slurred.
"Oh sweetheart, you have no idea how bad I can be," Anders stated going along with her charade.
The guard advanced down the stairs and began to head toward them.
Josie stopped, turned toward him and smiled her most seductive smile. Anders own grin faltered under her gaze. "Oh, I have a p-pretty good idea and let's just say as good as you think you are; I'm much better."
The guard kept heading towards them. Josie eased her hand that was hidden from the guard's view toward her dagger, but Anders grabbed her wrist stopping her. He slipped his other hand around her neck and pulled her to him. His lips crushed down on hers, she cried out in surprise, but as his experienced lips began to move against hers, her body relaxed and pressed into his. His hand released her wrist and slid around her waist, pulling her even tighter against his body. He felt so strong, so muscular…and so hard. She pulled away in shock. She couldn't believe that a playboy such as Anders would be that affected by a kiss.
She stared at him and saw hunger and desire burning in his eyes. She also saw the guard standing only a few feet away watching them intently. Josie leapt back into Anders' arms, once again his lips crashed against hers as his tongue hungrily pushed past her lips. This was no gentle kiss, Anders was staking a claim, letting her know loud and clear that he wanted her as he explored her mouth.
Against her consent, her body betrayed her as her blood rushed through her veins spreading heat and desire. Her nipples tightened as the heat between her legs intensified. This wasn't real, this wasn't happening. They were only pretending.
"Maker, I want you," Anders groaned against her lips.
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the guard smile as he turned to walk away, Josie spun out of Anders grasp, she pulled her dagger out and brought the pommel down against the guard's temple and he crumbled to the ground.
"That was amazing," Anders sighed.
She looked up at him questioningly and saw unquenched desire still in his eyes.
He saw her curious expression and quickly added. "That whole pommel thing, that was amazing."
"Nice distraction," Josie replied trying to cover up how that damn kissed had nearly been her undoing.
"Yeah, I do my best work under pressure," Anders chuckled.
"I'll have to keep that in mind," Josie said with a grin.
She leaned over the guard and using her dagger cut a long strip of cloth from his jacket.
"What are you doing?" Anders asked.
"I'm going to bind his hands and gag him so that he can't warn anyone in the warehouse," Josie explained.
"Oh…good idea."
"I'm full of good ideas."
"I'm beginning to see that."
They moved the unconscious bound guard further down the alleyway and hid his body behind some old crates.
She then turned to him. "Do have any experience with a blade?"
"Some…I'm no expert, but I can handle myself. Why?"
"There is a good chance that there are Templars in there. I want to hold off using magic for as long as possible. I will handle the majority of them, but I will need you to distract a few of them for me. Once most of them are down, then you can begin casting spells."
"Sounds like a plan."
"Are you proficient with single or dual weapons?"
"A sword," Anders replied.
She handed him her sword. "Josie, you're a duel weapons fighter. This will put you at a distinct disadvantage and you're our best chance of getting us out alive without magic."
Josie just smiled and shook her head. "Oh ye of little faith," she chuckled as she reached into her boot and pulled out a hidden dagger. "Always come prepared."
Josie slid the door to the warehouse open and they entered the dimly lit room. There were crates stacked up from floor to ceiling, creating a narrow path for them to follow. They cautiously eased through the passageway. Cullen had been right, they didn't come across one guard or Templar until they came to the end of the passage where two Templars stood guard at a doorway.
She turned to Anders, "You stay here. Don't make a move until you see me make one. Understand?"
Anders nodded. "What are you going to be doing?"
Josie smiled as she pulled her hair out of the ponytail and let it fall around her face. She used her fingers to fluff it up. She removed her armor vest then unbuttoned the top buttons her shirt and pushed her breasts up so that the mounds were visible. She pulled her shirt out of her pants, unbuttoned the bottom three ones. She pulled the shirt up and tied it under her breasts.
Anders eyes were wide when she turned to face him and she grinned. "That is the reaction that I was hoping for," she whispered.
"Do you have a thing for Templars? I would be more than willing to dress up as one and role play with you."
"Tempting, but no," Josie said dryly as she slid her daggers in the waist of her pants on her back. She let the tail of the shirt hang down trying to conceal the weapons as best as she could.
Josie drew in a deep breath and then stepped out of the shadows and into the light. "Hello boys," she purred.
Both of the Templars drew their swords, but as she came into full view both of their mouths dropped in unison. She strolled over to them, her hips swaying back and forth. "S-stop!" The short Templar with red hair stuttered.
Josie stopped and held up her hands, indicating that she was defenseless.
"Who are you?" The taller Templar demanded even as his eyes continued to roam over her body.
Josie smiled. "I'm a surprise present from Knight-Captain Owens."
"A present? For what?"
"He said that the two of you have been working long hours and getting very little rest. He wanted to show you his appreciation for your dedication."
"Why wouldn't he mention this?" The red head asked.
"Why that would ruin the surprise, silly," Josie said in a sweet voice.
"This could be a set-up," the taller Templar stated.
Josie giggled. "You boys have nothing to fear from little ole me. I wouldn't hurt you…unless you want me too. I'm always up for a round of 'spank the Templar'."
The red head's eyes widened. "Come on, Sal. Why do you always have to be such a stick in the mud? You don't want to hurt this sweet thing's feelings now, do you?"
Josie tossed her hair back and sauntered over to the tall Templar. She ran her hands down his arm. She gripped his bicep and let a little moan escape her lips. "Oh my Sal, what big strong muscles you have?" Her hand slipped down to his hip. "What else do you have that is big?"
The tall Templar was still hesitant. So Josie lifted her hands up to her breast and grinned. "Maybe this will persuade you," she cooed as pretended to be pulling down the top of her breast band. Instead she reached inside, grabbed a flask of Chameleon Cloud and dropped it. As the haze of smoke filled the room Josie pivoted on her right foot as she swung her left around, delivering a powerful kick to Sal's side, forcing the Templar to stumble. Josie rolled behind the tall man and brought the pommel of her dagger down against the side of the man's head. The Templar collapsed to the ground.
"Hey what in the Void happened?" The red head called out through the fog giving Josie his exact location. Josie shifted into the shadows, she reappeared behind him, she wrapped her arm around his neck and squeezed. Using all of his weight the Templar slammed her back against the wall, but she managed to hold on and continued to squeeze. He slammed her again and her breath went out of her lungs.
"A-anders, now would be a good time to jump in," she choked out.
"Oh, you actually want my help," Anders said as he strolled up to them and froze the Templar in place.
"I told you to make a move when I made a move," Josie panted trying to catch her breath.
"Well, I didn't want to cast a spell into the haze and accidently hit you. Besides, you looked like you were handling it perfectly fine on your own."
"Yes, except for having the air beat out of my lungs, it was all under control," Josie replied sarcastically as she bent down, pulled out her dagger and began to cut away material from their skirts to gag and bind them. Together, they moved them behind some crates.
They opened the door and found a set of stairs that descended into a basement. The cautiously made their way down the stairs and followed a narrow dimly lit corridor to another door. Josie tried it, but it was locked. She pulled her lockpick out of her breast band and went to work on the lock.
Anders looked over her shoulder and down at her chest. "Anything else you have in there? Maybe a bottle of brandy, baby bronto or a pot of gold."
"Nope, just my breasts," Josie replied.
"And will you be pulling those out any time soon?"
"I'm sure you would like that, but no they aren't on the agenda tonight."
"How about tomorrow night? I'm sure I could free up some time and quill you in," Anders chuckled just as the lock clicked open.
The door swung open into a pitch black room. "Anders, grab a torch from the wall."
When they entered, Josie heard the air literally sucked out of Anders as they stared at the rows and rows of phylacteries. "Maker's breath, that is a lot of blood," Anders sighed.
Josie walked up to the first row. She picked up a vial and looked at it. On the label it read /Ferelden/Bloomingtide, Fourth day of the Twenty-ninth Year of the Dragon Age. She picked up the next vial. It read /Nevarra/Kingsway, Twenty-fifth day of the Thirtieth-eighth Year of the Dragon Age.
"Anders, these are all alphabetical. What is your last name?"
"I don't have one," he replied.
She turned and looked at him. "You don't have a last name?"
He smiled tenderly at her. "No, not that I remember, I was young when I was taken from my family and brought to Ferelden. Anders was actually a nickname because I was from Anderfels. "
"What is your real name?"
He grinned at her, "That my dear lady is privileged information."
"And what do I have to do to earn the privilege for the information?"
Anders just gave her a lopsided grin as he continued to scan the phylactery names. "So you're telling me that all the women you have slept with know your first name?"
"No of course not… wouldn't be too privileged if that was all it took."
"Well, what then?"
"You have to win my heart," Anders purred in her ear as he walked by her.
"And how many women have won your heart?"
"None."
She must have been giving him a sad expression. "Don't look at me like that. I don't need your sympathy. Love is a luxury that mages can't afford."
"Everyone needs to love and feel loved, Anders."
"Oh, don't you worry, I get plenty of lovin'."
"That isn't what I meant and you… Anders, I found it!" Josie exclaimed as pulled the vial out of its holder. The label read, Anders/ Anderfels/ Drakonis, Tenth day of the Seventeenth Year of the Dragon Age.
She handed it to Anders and watched his fingers tremble as he took it from her. He stared at it for the longest time before a huge smile spread across his face. "I'm free…" he sighed.
He grabbed her in his arms and swung her around. "I'm free, Josie! I'm really free!"
"So does that mean that in the near future I will find your bed at the Keep empty?"
He grinned at her. "Maybe… I might be in your bed keeping you warm."
"Maker, give me patience," Jose muttered as she headed for the door. "We need to go Anders, before someone comes to check on these guards."
They exited the building and Josie headed down to the beach. She took Anders' phylactery, opened it up, bent down and submerged it into the water. The blood slowly seeped out and diluted with the sea water. When the vial was completely clean, Josie replaced the cork and handed it to Anders.
He took the phylactery, set it in the sand and then cast a fireball at it. When the blaze died out the label that held his name was burned off. He reached down and picked it up. "I want you to keep this. Something to remind you that you once helped free a mage."
He stepped into her and pulled her to him. He leaned down, but Josie touched his lips with her fingers. He paused and looked at her. "Look Anders, what happened before was just part of the distraction."
Anders stared into her eyes for a long moment then said, "No it wasn't Jo, I could feel that you wanted me and it was no secret that I wanted you."
Josie stepped out of his embrace. "I'm sorry, Anders, but I'm not into having meaningless sex just because I'm attracted to you."
Anders lips turned up into seductive grin. "Who said sex between us would be meaningless?"
"I do, because I'm broken beyond even your ability to heal." She spun on her heels and headed back up the beach. "We need to get back before the others worry."
She could feel his eyes on her as they made their way back to the inn. She knew he wanted to talk, but she wasn't up for some emotional rehashing of her doomed relationship with Alistair. Not to mention, just saying his name still made her heart ache and her blood boil at the same time.
As Josie made her way through the front door of the inn, Nathaniel rose from a chair near the fireplace. "Josie, can I talk to you for a moment?"
"I'm really tired, Nate and in no mood to have another verbal sparring match with you," Josie retorted.
Nathaniel shook his head. "No, I don't want to fight with you either. I just want to talk, please have a seat and let me explain."
"Fine," Josie conceded. She looked over at Anders. "I'll see you in the morning bright and early. We will be heading back to Vigil's Keep."
Anders nodded as he headed up to his room and Josie took a seat across from the man that had been her dearest childhood friend.
"Jo, I owe you an apology. I had dinner with Delilah and she explained everything to me… about how my father had become a cruel, vicious killer that was driven by his crazy ambition… I can't believe he murdered your family, Josie. I-I knew he was jealous of your father, but I never thought it would led him to… to do what he did."
"Nate, you always wanted to see the best in your father and you always made excuse for his behavior…"
"No I didn't!"
"Yes you did! When he beat the shit out of you and then out of me for putting itching powder in his boot, you made excuses for his out of control behavior and then begged me not to tell Fergus or my father… If I had… If I had told them that the Arl had used a riding crop on me, on a Teyrn's daughter… my family might still be alive."
"Come on, Josie that's a far stretch."
"Your father was out of control, Nate and you knew it. That is why you knocked him out with that horseshoe. You knew your father was going to kill me. I can only imagine the beating you endured when he came too, but if my father had known, he would have gone to the king…"
"And my family would have lost everything."
"They still lost everything, Nate, but maybe my family would be alive."
"That is a lot of maybes and what ifs, Josie, even for you."
"You didn't see the raped and broken body of your sister-in-law. You didn't see your nephew's throat cut from ear to ear, you didn't see your father sliced open by a man he called friend and left to die. I did! So I can speculate all I want!"
She breathed in deep, trying to collect herself. The events of tonight had her emotions running out of control. She looked over at Nathaniel who looked like someone had just punched him in the stomach, but at this point she was beyond caring. She stood up, ready to be done with this conversation. "If this is your idea of an apology, Nate, then you really need to work on your social skills, but I'm done. Good-night."
With that she spun on her heels leaving Nathaniel to ponder the extent of Rendon Howe's betrayal.
A/N - Thank you to everyone that has added this story to their fav and alert lists.I appreciate the support.
*I normally try to reply to everyone that takes the time to review, but I have been swamped at work and was unable to do so for this chapter, so a big shout out to Stobbzzwife and Suilven for sharing their thoughts with me. I really appreciate it!
*Huge hug to the betalicious Bonzy for working on this chapter even though she was sick. You're a real trooper, my friend. Here is Anders' cookie…with ice cream, whip topping and don't forget the cherry.
*Also, a huge thank you to the asstastic Jinxy for being a guest beta on this chapter. I love your magical touch.