A/N: This chapter takes place prior to the first one, which is a prologue. We'll get there eventually! Thanks for reading! And thank you so much to everybody who actually stuck with this story even though I never updated it after publishing the first chapter.
Four months after her arrival in the village, Rin had finally allowed herself to let her guard down, if only a little. The longer she spent there, the more the horrors of the past year seemed to fade into the background, as if they had only been a dream. She had been welcomed by the villagers with open arms, and was finally beginning to feel that she truly belonged with them as a member of their close-knit community. The village elder, Mogami-san, had proved an especially kind soul, and had selflessly given Rin a place at her home and table. Of all the villagers, Mogami had become Rin's closest friend and confidant, with the exception of Kaoru.
Initially, his mischieviousness and good humour had reminded her so much of Shippo that her heart hurt desperately. She had initially avoided him, but eventually the two had become very good friends. They had much in common, and had shared stories of their lives before- before it happened. Kaoru's village had been lost early on, while he was out labouring in the rice fields of a neighbouring village. He had been devastated when he returned to find all of his loved ones dead. When he told her this, Rin was momentarily overcome with a strange joyful relief. Although she had been forced to see many of her loved ones die, she knew the person she loved most was safe, wherever he was. Kaoru had not been so lucky. His beloved fiance had escaped the initial massacre by fleeing into the forest, but unused to physical exertion, she had eventually lost her strength and collapsed on the path as easy prey for passing walkers. While fleeing the ruined village, Kaoru happened upon her the next day, nearly drained of life. She had died in his arms.
Rin choked down discomfort when he added that he was reminded her every time he looked at Rin. She pretended not to notice how he gazed at her out of the corner of his vision, the way his eyes were locked to her as she moved about the room. All she wanted in this world was a friend. Her heart was forever closed off to the possibility of loving another person.
After weeks of skirting around the issue, Rin could feign ignorance to Kaoru's intentions no longer. He had been patient and gentle in his pursuit, but finally made his intentions clear by asking her for her hand. Rin knew that he would truly be a caring and honourable husband, just as she knew that despite the deep love she had for him, she would never be able to love him in that way. Mogami had tried to encourage Rin, but had ceased her well-meaning teasing upon seeing the look in Rin's eyes. She knew that the girl had something holding her back from giving her heart to him, and suspected that this was because Rin had already given her heart to another. In those rare instances where she allowed herself to dwell on the past, Rin imagined that Lady Kaede would have approved of him, though she knew that Kaede would also have encouraged her to follow her heart. Rin knew she no longer had such luxuries. Two weeks later, she had allowed him to kiss her. It felt like a betrayal.
Time passed. One morning, the entire village was surprised and overjoyed to wake up to the sounds of birds singing and the sight of the sun's rays brightly filtering down from the heavens. It was the first time in months that the sky hadn't been buried under heavy blankets of dark clouds, and Rin had almost forgotten what the sun felt like on her skin in the face of all that grey bleakness.
Now, the sun shone warmly down upon the village. It smiled down upon her, like a promise of better times yet to come. Rin was filled with the hope that maybe she could make a life here. She clenched Kaoru's hand tighter in hers, but could not bring herself to meet his eyes and return his smile.
Hearing the sound of girlish laughter, Rin looked over at the two little girls weaving flower crowns in the meadow next to the headman's hut. The yellow blossoms fluttered around them with the tall grass, and Rin was unable to suppress the memory of a similar summer's day, long ago, when she herself had experienced the unrestrained joy of childhood. She remembered crouching on the ground in a similar fashion, overwhelmed by the sheer beauty of her surroundings, her tiny fingers nimbly crafting crown after crown as an expression of her love and gratitude. And time after time, he had accepted the gifts, though Jaken had openly criticized her and called her foolish for holding up their party. Her Lord never said anything, but his ever-stoic expression seemed to soften when she placed her gifts into his waiting palm. She had always felt that he was accepting her gratitude and childish adoration along with those gifts. As she grew older and her feelings shifted, she began to hope that her feelings were reaching him- that maybe he knew when she gave him her tokens, she was really giving him her heart.
Rin felt a wetness on her cheek and realized she was crying. She brought a hand up to her face, and when she brought it away again she saw that her fingers were stained with red. Suddenly noticing the eerie calm, Rin looked up again. Kaoru had vanished from her side. She spotted him, lying on his side 20 feet away. Or at least, what was left of him. His body was broken pitifully, stamped into the dirt and stained red. It was everywhere. The stench of blood assaulted her nostrils and she whipped her head from side to side, taking in the carnage- everyone she had come to care about in the last few months was there, in the street. Her gaze landed on the broken bodies of the village girls out in the field, with their bones snapped cruelly out of place, chunks of flesh torn off, eyes staring forward without seeing, and mouths frozen in screams of terror.
She heard a hysteric screams, strangely garbled and faded in the distance. She realized that she was the one making them.
Rin woke up with a start and was momentarily surprised to be greeted with a view of the open sky instead of the worn beams of the roof of Mogami-san's hut. The clear blue mocked her. There was no hope. There was no future. Not anymore.