A/N: I wanted to write Shego's POV 5 years ago but no song seemed just right. This one does. I suggest listening to it once before you read. Also, this is Shego's pov of flashbacks so it's written a little differently and they'll be gaps in the story.
Song: He'll Never Love You (HNLY) - Hayley Kiyoko
The supervillainous known as Shego was by all means and purposes confident. Maybe it was the flaming green plasma powers. Maybe it was the voluptuous curves she both hid and flaunted in her skintight leotard. Whatever the reason, Shego possessed the innate ability to feel extremely secure in every move she made. It was that confidence that led her to her current predicament, leaning lazily against a wall in nothing but a haphazardly buttoned pajama top and a frown, staring into the deep brown eyes of Kim's buffoonish sidekick turned boyfriend. The silence between them stretched on in slow motion as they listened to the sniffling in the background along with the closing of dresser drawers.
Not that silence was necessarily a problem. Really there was nothing she could say that wouldn't get her in trouble. What exactly were you supposed to say when you walk into your lover's living room half naked to find her boyfriend sitting teary-eyed on the sofa? It's not like they could deny what had happened. Based on the redness in his cheeks and the clenching of his fists in his lap, Shego was sure he had been there long enough to hear them. Or at least to hear Kim. Hear her yell out Shego's name. Hear her screaming for more. Hear her shouting out a proclamation of love so loud that it had even shocked the villain herself. So why deny what they all now knew to be true?
The eye contact was broken by the sounds of Kim's footsteps descending the stairs. They both looked up to see her far more clothed than the first time she had come running down those stairs giggling, chased by a grinning Shego. She know had on a pair of baggy pink sweatpants and a long sleeve white shirt, that Shego was certain she chose as an attempt to hide any signs of their previous lovemaking. Her hair was pulled back into a messy ponytail and her eyes shimmered with tears she seemed to struggle to keep from falling.
Pausing at the bottom of the steps to stare at the two people she cared most about in the world. Kim took a deep breathe and made her way past the chair in front of Shego to sit next to Ron.
Turning to stare at her, Ron swiped a thumb across her cheek to catch a stray tear before grabbing her hand and linking his fingers with her. "Tell me the truth Kim," Ron spoke softly as he stared deeply into her eyes.
Kim didn't speak for a moment, but then the stiffness in her shoulders seemed to melt away as she exhaled a gentle sigh and began her story for Ron.
Still standing silently against the wall, arms wrapped firmly under her chest, Shego could do nothing but watch the exchange between the couple. The whispered voices barely carried to her lonely little corner and, as Ron scooted closer to wrap an arm around Kim's waist, Shego watched as Kim leaned her head to rest briefly on Ron's shoulder. Her fingers clenched underneath her arms as she stopped herself from interrupting the two, fighting back the feeling of dread and jealousy that coursed through her veins. Casting her eyes anywhere but on the looks on the two high school sweethearts faces', Shego contemplated just leaving the house, the girl, and the whole crazy mess behind, until her eyes caught sight of Kim's long supple neck and the dark purple mark visible there.
I left a mark on your neck
I know that you won't forget
Yeah I know, yeah I know
I'm the best you've ever had
Yeah cause I'm sweet like that
Yeah you know, yeah you know
The first time Shego had truly stared at Kim's neck, the only thought that crossed her mind is how much she wanted to wring it. The cheerleader had some balls. When Shego had been strapped with specialty handcuffs, ones made specifically for transporting her, and told that she had a visitor, she had expected to see her very well paid Henchco lawyer. What she got instead was a very nervous looking teen hero, fidgeting quietly at a table as she stared down at her lap.
"You have twenty minutes Miss Possible," the guard said stoically as he walked off to stand quietly at the door to the private visiting area.
Shego said nothing as she slowly seated herself across from Kim, eyes glaring dangerously as the redhead finally lifted her head to look back at the prisoner. Forest green eyes roved up and down Shego's form so intensely that she fought back the impulse to squirm under the scrutiny.
"So what," Shego began caustically, "you here to finish the job, Princess?" Shego's mind raced as she savored the way Kim flinched and shut her eyes at the hate filled question.
"No," Kim said quietly, lifting her forest green eyes to stare deeply into emerald ones. "I'm here to explain and to say I'm sorry." Kim's eyes welled with tears as her voice broke,"Oh god Shego, I'm so sorry."
The green-skinned villain opened her mouth to spit out a snarky reply, but before it could leave her tongue she watched as the girl who could do anything seemed to break in front of her. Tears streamed down Kim's cheek and a sob choked past her throat as Kim continued to speak frantically. "I didn't mean it. I mean i did but I didn't. I meant to kick you. I meant to hurt you. I, I won't lie. But I didn't mean what happened. I didn't mean that I hate you. I didn't mean to...I didn't mean to try and kill you. And I know you don't want to see me. I know we're enemies but...but I had to. I had to see that you, that you were okay." Kim bit her lip nervously to stop from talking as she waited for Shego to reply.
And wait she did.
Shego's mind raced as she tried to think through all the redhead had said. She was sorry. Well of course she was sorry, she's a hero. What good did a sorry mean after you kick someone into a high voltage tower. Sure the tower wouldn't have killed her, but Kim didn't know that. She didn't mean to almost kill her. That was just plain obvious. Of course she didn't mean to kill her. She was Kim Possible. She was too much of a goody goody to get her hands truly dirty. Still, it didn't mean that Shego hadn't been hurt. It didn't mean that Shego hadn't seen her life flash before her eyes as her body sailed into the air and the plasma within her pulsed as she neared the electric current. Sure, they fought, it was what her and Kimmie did, but that moment had been different. It had been a line crossed.
Looking at the other girl's dejected form across from her, Shego knew she should want to still hurt Kim. She knew she should want to make her feel the same way she felt as hundreds of volts of electricity had shot through every vein in her body. She knew she should ask to be brought back to her cell, but instead she found herself asking the same question that had plagued her mind for the last month she spent locked up.
"You don't hate me?"
Their twenty minutes seemed to simultaneously drag on and fly by after that one question and at the end of the visit Shego found herself engulfed in the younger woman's arms. She could feel Kim's breath on her neck as Kim whispered a quiet "Thank you" into her ear before pulling back and staring intensely into Shego's emerald eyes. Kim's fingers twitched as they began to lift slowly toward Shego's cheek before being pulled back with a shake of her head. Without thinking Shego found herself telling Kim that she should visit her again.
And Kim had. Every three days like clockwork.
They fell into the visits much as they fell into their fights. There was a seamlessness to the conversation once they had gotten past the awkwardness of what they had deemed "that night." Sure they were enemies but they respected each other. Besides, Shego reasoned to herself, their fighting was just business and whatever their meetings were was definitely pleasure. From teasing Kimmie about being such a goody two shoes to watching a blush creep upon her cheeks whenever Shego said anything slightly flirtatious, the green skinned thief definitely got some type of enjoyment from the visits and if the slight touches and longing stares were any evidence, so did Kim.
Shego licked her lips as she was brought from her revere. Those were definitely the most pleasurable days she had spent in prison. True, she had only been in for a few months seeing as Junior had broke her out to help find a birthday gift for his father, but still they were the start of all of this, Shego thought as she continued to watch the woman she loved talk with her boyfriend.
Playing with my finger tips,
Sitting there biting your lip
Trying to kiss
Who are you trying to trick?
Why don't you just cut the shit?
The night that Shego had been broken out of prison had been as spontaneous as it gets. She had heard the whir of the helicopter just as every other inmate had, but, as she watched it glide above the men's wing of the prison, she knew exactly whom it belonged to. She should have, she'd flown it multiple times while training the hair gel loving pretty boy. After escaping the confines of her prison cell and ensuring that SSJ didn't expect her to pop out of a cake for his dear old dad, Shego took the keys to the copter, claiming to need to get her standard uniform and some supplies, and made her way to Middleton. She was free again and seeing as a certain cheerleader visited her so often, she felt the need to return the favor. Even if it was 9 at night.
Stopping at an apartment she had in the city, Shego enjoyed a shower and changed into her regular jumpsuit before making her way to the teenager's home. As she climbed the roof of the Possible house, Shego circled around to take stock of the family. She had taken a while in her first proper shower in months so most of the household seemed to be sleeping soundly, much to her approval. Arriving at Kim's window, Shego slipped inside and paused to look around the room. The room was a nauseating amount of pink and it was clear that Kim hadn't redecorated in years. Cuddlebuddies were displayed randomly around the room and a the trapdoor leading to the lower levels of the house was closed and latched. Good, Shego thought as she walked around the room to stand above the sleeping teenager whose room she had broken into.
Kim was sleeping. Or trying to it seemed. Her face was fixed into a hard frown and every few seconds incoherent mumbles slipped past her pouty pink lips. Shego watched for a while as the crease in the girl's forehead seemed to get deeper as she sucked her teeth in her sleep and said Ron's name in annoyance. Shego felt her own annoyance grow out of nowhere. Why would Kimmie be dreaming about the buffoon when she should be dreaming of me?
Deciding that she didn't need to hear the fool's name again, the thief bent down and ran her fingers through the soft red tresses that she'd gotten used to having pressed against her nose whenever Kim gave her a goodbye hug. Enjoying the softness between her fingers, Shego twirled the locks as she leaned down to whisper in Kim's ear.
"Hey Princess it's time to wake up."
Kim woke with a jolt. Eyes snapping open and body launching off her bed. Blurry eyed and confused, she was a sight to behold. Her green tank top had rose on one side to ride high on her flat stomach. Her blue short shorts left very little of her legs to the imagination and oh how Shego had imagined those legs. Her hair was mussed from flinging herself from her bed and landing into a defense position. Shego couldn't help but laugh as she gave the girl an appreciative up down before speaking.
"Ah honey, I thought you'd be happy that I'm home."
"Shego? You're really here?" Kim blinked rubbing her eyes and trying to focus on the woman in front of her. "What are you doing out of prison?"
"Oh I'm out on good behavior Kimmie," Shego said while circling the younger girl who still had her arms raised in a fighting stance. "But you know," she continued as she stopped directly behind Kim, placing her hands on her hips and leaning to whisper in her ear, "Now that I'm out, I don't feel like being good. How about you?"
Before Kim could reply, Shego had spun her around and gently pressed her dark lips against the other woman's. Completely shocked, Kim could do nothing but gasp as she felt the villain's lips touch her own and relax her fighting stance. As Shego's fingers slid their way to fully wrap around her waist, she watched as Kim's eyes slowly closed and her hands wrapped around green woman's neck. Taking that as a good sign, Shego slid her tongue along Kim's bottom lip waiting for permission to blunder the other girl's mouth. Kim's gentle moan seemed to be all the permission she needed, but before she could slip her tongue past the other girl's lips, Kim had jumped back, eyes wide, and head shaking back and forth.
"Shego what are you doing?" Kim hissed.
"I thought that was obvious," Shego shrugged with a confused expression on her face. "What's your deal, Princess?"
"My deal?! You kissed me," Kim stared at Shego with an incredulous look. "You're not in jail. You're in my room. This isn't a dream and you kissed me." Kim whispered the last part as she began to pace back and forth in front of her bed, keeping her distance away from the other room's occupant.
Shego watched as the hero paced back and forth, trying to piece together what was going on. Sure she hadn't planned on kissing Kim so early in the conversation, but she didn't see what the big deal was. Kim liked Shego. Shego liked Kim. They'd been talking for weeks. Shego didn't see the problem.
"Ohhkay sooo you've been kissed before right Kimmie, cuz I'm feeling like Dr. D here. Am I missing something?" Shego raised an eyebrow as she placed a hand to her cocked hip, scrutinizing the panicking Kim Possible.
Kim stopped pacing to give Shego an annoyed look. "Of course I've been kissed before but...but your a supervillain." Kim stated as if it should be obvious. "And we're enemies."
"Oh come now Kimmie. You visiting other 'enemies' in prison that I don't know about?" Shego asked sarcastically while airquoting with both gloved hands.
Kim frowned at Shego's logic. "Well fine maybe not enemies, but still you're a girl Shego," Kim said with a twinge of sadness and pity coming through the last half. "And I'm...I'm not gay." Kim's face broke into an apologetic frown. "I'm sorry." Her eyes shined with unspilled tears as she watched the play of emotions cross upon the mercenary's face.
Shego stared slightly slack jawed as she took in the other girl who seemed to be struggling to control her breathing. Her chest rose and fell heavily as her fingers clenched at her sides, gripping onto the fabric of her pajama shorts. Her lips were red and plump from the kiss they had just shared and Shego could see the tip of her tongue peek out slowly to slide almost subconsciously against her bottom lip. Her last words replayed in the older woman's mind. I'm not gay. I'm sorry. After what felt like hours Shego opened her mouth to finally reply, but instead of the words she'd been thinking all that left her lips was a boisterous laugh.
"Oh God Kimmie," Shego let out between the sounds of her amusement, doubling over to clutch at her stomach. Her abs aching from the sheer power behind her enjoyment and she had to stop herself from falling over to roll on the ground. "Ohhhh man, I needed a good laugh. Yeah sure. You're not gay and I'm not a criminal." Shego continued to laugh at Kim's expense, paying no heed to the anger making it's way upon the teenagers face.
"Shego, I'm serious," Kim huffed as she stumped her feet slightly. "I'm not gay. I...I was just shocked when you kissed me and I had a bad night at this restaurant with Ron and…"
"Wait," Shego cut her off, not really listening to the tale the girl was starting to tell. "You...you really think that you're straight?" she questioned incredulously.
Kim stopped her mumbled rant to stare at Shego with confusion. "You really think I'm not?" Kim countered.
"Well doy," Shego replied rolling her eyes. "I mean it's obvious."
"How's it obvious?" Kim replied pouting.
"Umm let's see," Shego replied singsongingly with a voice full of false helpfulness. Ticking off clawed fingers as she went on, "Your clothes, your personality."
"Hey," Kim replied offended only to be ignored by Shego who went on.
"You're a cheerleader, your failed love life, your obsession with wrestling me, the way you acted when you'd visit me, and the fact that I'm sure your panties are wet just from that one little kiss. Just to name a few."
Kim gasped at the slightly vulgar comment and took a step back from the villain. "I'm not gay Shego," she replied firmly.
"Yeah well your actions prove otherwise Princess." Shego responded, shaking her head as she watched the other girl's growing anger.
"Look," Kim began as she tried to wrap her head around the situation she was in, "I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong impression, but I'm straight. I just, I just visited you at prison because of what happened. And well because I like talking to you. And because…"
"And because you'd stay up at night thinking about what it'd be like if I slid my hands slowly down every inch of your body," Shego finished in a nonchalant tone.
"Shego!" Kim screamed before clasping a hand over her mouth, hoping that she hadn't woken her parents.
"Look Kimmie," Shego began boredly. "This is all suuuper interesting and all but I have a prior engagement I have to return to so how about I leave?" Shego moved slowly towards the panicked hero, hips swaying gently as she did so. "And you stay here and argue with yourself about how straight you are?" With that Shego quickly tangled her hand in Kim's hair to pull her into a rough kiss. Unlike their first one, there was no gentleness involved. Shego mashed their lips together in a bone searing display, yanking Kim's petite body to mold against hers and nipping roughly at the lower lip trapped between hers. She moaned into the other girl's mouth as she enjoyed the feel of their bodies pressed together and chuckled lightly when she heard a responding moan.
Shego had moved then. Vanishing out of the window without another word. Confident that they'd see each other soon. Real soon. And when they did, she'd be in the girl's head far deeper than she already was.
Ignoring her own thoughts and focusing instead on the story Kim was telling, Shego caught Ron's eyes as Kim explained how she was upset with him after a date at Chez Couteaux. How she really hated his coupon book and how Shego had randomly slipped in her room after the disaster of that day. Their gaze stayed locked as Kim explained the rest of the night. The shock she felt. The annoyance. The need. Ron turned to lock eyes with Kim and Shego felt the same feeling of dread wash over her. She tried to catch Kim's eye but hers stayed locked on Ron's face. Never straying.
Cause baby you know that you got it
Girl yeah you know that you want it
Girl why can't you just be honest with yourself?
Weeks went by since their kiss and with every fight they had, Shego could feel the tension building. Every time she saw the redhead drop in from nowhere to save the day, her eyes would rove the body she knew she'd have pressed up against her in just a matter of minutes. That's what their fights had become. No more vicious punches and burning slashes with her plasma blazing on high. Instead their dance had changed. Instead of mild threats and annoyance there was small talk and flirtation. Instead of throwing each other from high altitudes there was grappling for dominance on the ground. Instead of wasting time with Drakken and Ron, it was just the two of them, battling in a game no one else knew about.
It was wonderful and infuriating at the same time and, by the time Shego found herself covered in mud in Greece, she knew that the game had reached its peak and was ready to collect her prize. That night after their battle with Warmonga, she threw a sly reply Kim's way about Midas having the golden touch, making her voice as raspy and flirty as possible and started to walk seductively away. After taking just a few steps, she flung her hair to the side and looked over her shoulder. She could see the slight anger in Kim's expression as well as a hint of arousal. "Next time your mine Kimmie." She told the girl with a wink and watched as Kim's shield finally cracked as she replied to the challenge.
That night as Shego snuck her way back into the familiar pink room, she found herself almost immediately pinned to the wall. Soft lips moved frantically against hers as small hands yanked her wrists above her head. A growl escaped her lips as Kim took her bottom lip between her teeth and pulled back. Despite her shock at the unexpected role reversal, Shego couldn't help but love every minute of it. Kim was all bruising kisses and kneading palms as she unzipped the green and black jumpsuit from her body, and, as Shego felt lithe fingers thrust suddenly into her wet opening, she couldn't stop her eyes from rolling to the back of her head or halt the soft exhale of the redhead's name. The moments after that were a blur of frantic bodies moving against each other as Kim snarled in Shego's ear. Asking her if she let that idiot Midas touch her. If she missed the feel of their bodies intertwined. If she knew who she belonged to. It was all Shego could do but bury her face in the neck before her and bite down hard as she came against Kim's fingers body jerking madly as she tried stifling her moan of pleasure.
"I really don't need to hear this part," Ron informed Kim as calmly as possible as she moved on to tell him about their Warmonga experience and despite herself Shego felt a pang of sympathy for the boy. Sure, he had gotten in her way more times than he probably knew but here he was listening calmly as his cheating girlfriend told her story. Shego couldn't help but feel a sense of respect for the young man in front of her. She knew for a fact that she wouldn't be so calm.
I know everyday you're thinking of me
I make it better when you're feelin' lonely
You say no one will understand
You wish you could but you just can't so
How many days?
How many nights?
'Til you realize
He'll never love you like me
He'll never love you like me
Shego didn't know when it happened, but somewhere along the way the game they played took a turn. Sure they had slept together like she wanted, but their relationship had started to take on a new element. Numbers were exchanged and the once romantically indifferent mercenary found herself glued to her phone waiting for a call. A text. A pic. Not that she had to wait very long; they talked almost constantly. Their long and easy flowing conversations reminded Shego of their prison visits, but this time around there was no elephant in the room stifling how they truly felt. There was an element of honesty that hadn't been there before. Now, she knew exactly how the other girl's day went, what happened at cheer practice, what idiotic experiment her brothers tried to pull, and so much more. They'd take turns sneaking away to see each other, Shego taking occasions to fly them off on Drakken's "borrowed" hovercraft to explore cities far away from the prying eyes of Middleton. Even when she had been hit with the Attitudinator, Shego had sought Kim out, knowing without a doubt that the girl would help her and not just because she was a hero.
It had been the sweetest torture. Sure she was basically trapped in her own head, her inner "goodness" turning her into a soft spoken, bubbly teacher, but she had a whole week of living with Kim. Going out to eat and watch a movie. Taking pictures together in a photo booth and chasing each other around the mall had been a surreal experience and, if the buffoon hadn't hit her with the attitudinator when he did, she was sure she would have let slip something she hadn't expected to feel. The look of anger and sadness that Kim directed at her sidekick after he shot her made her believe that the feeling just might be mutual, but they never brought it up.
That was why when she first heard the fool's question about them dating, Shego could do nothing but pause her attack and stare at him incredulously flippantly denying his claim. She didn't know what he was up to. Her first thought was that he was trying to take advantage of Kim's memory loss, but why would he ask her? Maybe this was just a joke, but really it wasn't that funny. As she listened to him pleading with Kim to remember them, Shego was finally struck with the truth. Kim hadn't told him. She was still dating him. She had lied.
He was still trying to convince the amnesiatic hero when Shego did the first thing she could think of and threw a plasma blast directly at his chest sending him flying back and ending his dribble. It was then that the other girl recalled the villainous before her, prompted by the green glow that Shego knew could send the teen spasming over the edge. Anger boiled in the green skinned woman's veins as the thought crossed her mind and she shook her head to rid herself of those thoughts. Steeling herself from the memories that flashed before her, Shego prepared to take out all of the betrayal she felt out on the redhead when her "boyfriend" jumped to her protection. The fool didn't know how bad a decision that was until it was too late.
Snarling to herself at the memory, Shego noticed that Kim had stopped talking and Ron was now staring at her with a look of perplexion. Angry at having been caught up in a memory she'd really rather not think about, the mercenary pushed roughly off of the wall and made her way into the kitchen. Cutting on the cold water in the sink, she could do nothing but splash her face a few times to calm her swirling emotions.
Gripping onto the edge of the counter, she dipped her head and tried to calm her breathing. She had been beyond hurt that day. She wasn't a fool, she knew Kim lied. Hell most of the time, Kim had been lying because of her, but she just didn't expect Kim to lie to her. Her fingers tightened around the granite beneath them as she tried to tell herself that it was in the past. That things were different now. That Kim had explained herself and Shego understood why she stayed with Ron. She tried repeating it in her head but still she couldn't shake the doubt that was trying to consume her as she listened to her lover talking in the next room as she stood alone in the kitchen. Shego couldn't help but think that maybe Ron wasn't the only fool in Kim's life.
Talking until 3 a.m.
Giving me that look again
Yeah I know, yeah I know
I'm the drug you never did
Higher than you've ever been
Yeah you know, yeah you know
Once the hero's memories returned, she avoided the other girl like the plague, taking a few days of vacation time to try and wrap her mind around all that had happened. Kim had tried calling her almost immediately after her mission. Shego didn't pick up. After sending a fifth call straight to voicemail, the texts came. PLZ PICK UP. She hit the delete button immediately. Shego I'm so sorry. Please just call me. Delete. We need to talk about this. Delete. This process lasted for hours as the hero turned villain flew a hovercraft as fast as she could to an island in the Caribbean that always helped to clear her mind.
When she finally landed the craft on the roof of a getaway home that only a handful of people knew of, it was well past 3 a.m. She hadn't gotten a call or text in over two hours so it seemed Kim had taken the hint. As Shego slowly made her way down the steps leading into the house, she peeled away her clothes slowly, tossing the articles onto the floor as she went. Apathetic to the mess she was making, Shego sighed as she made it into the master bedroom and crawled underneath the silky green sheets that waited for her. Turning to lay on her side, she could do nothing but stare emotionlessly at the wall across from her. She felt nothing. No emotion. She was numb. She was tired, but other than that she'd be okay. It wasn't that big a deal, she told herself as she allowed her eyes to drift close. Just as darkness began to envelop her, she was pulled from sleep by the beeping of her phone and automatically grabbed at it to stare at the screen. I love you.
Unbidden tears streamed down her cheeks, as her body was wracked with pain. She stared blurry eyed at the phone in her hand, knowing she should do away with the text just like she had the others, but unable to bring herself to do so. She loved her too.
Letting the phone slide to the floor, Shego laid back down in her bed, pulling the covers to completely encase her entire body. Tears continued to flow but she didn't bother to stop them. She needed to cry. She needed to sleep as well and eventually she'd need to talk to Kimmie, but, for now, she needed to cry and she wasn't going to stop herself.
Took me like I was a hit
Addicted but trying to quit
Get over it
Act like you already did
So thirsty, you're drowning in it
Rubbing her temples, Shego made her way to the dining table and slumped into the cushioned seat. She remembered spending a week in that getaway. The first two days she barely moved from beneath her blanket, but on the third day she was forced out of her self imposed cocoon by the sound of her front door being opened and a frantic voice shouting out her name. Kim had found her. She had had her nerdlinger track down the location of Drakken's hovercrafts and found her.
When Kim had appeared in the frame of her bedroom door, panting heavily, Shego could do nothing but stare in shock. She hadn't expected the girl to come after her. She had stopped calling. She had even stopped texting her, except for once every night, she'd receive a simple I love you. I'm sorry. Shego hadn't replied.
"Shego," Kim gasped her name in relief, pausing only momentarily to take in the sight before her before launching herself on the floor near the other woman and breaking into tears.
Somewhere in between sobs, Kim began to explain herself. Apologizing repeatedly for lying, begging Shego to just give her a chance to explain, which she did, though the explanation didn't make things better. She was scared. She hadn't wanted to be gay. She didn't want to be judged. She didn't want to be different. So she had denied it. Denied the lingering looks she'd give to other girls in the locker room. Denied the lack of spark anytime she'd crush on a guy at school. Denied the way her heart skipped a beat every time she'd see Shego.
She had already been dating Ron when things began and she just hadn't told the other woman that it was serious. She had tried to tell Ron numerous times but she couldn't bring herself to break his heart. He'd never forgive her and everything would change. People would find out. People would know she's gay. People would hate her. People wouldn't want her to save the world anymore.
Shego, who had been growing angrier with each passing confession, paused to look at the dejected girl before her. Her hair hung in front of her face as she stared down at her fists sitting clenched in her own lap. Hiccups jolted her body every so often as she tried to stop her crying. The girl was a mess and she was hurting, but Shego wasn't anyone's dirty little secret. She refused to be, but she also refused to ignore how familiar Kim's fear was. She knew what it was like. She knew how it felt to be outed as a hero. She knew what the media could do to your reputation even if you pretended not to care. She knew that it was best for Kim to keep everyone in the dark.
"My mom knows," Kim had interrupted Shego's train of thought. "I told her...and my best friend Monique."
"Told them what?" Shego asked as the other girl finally lifted her head to meet the deep green eyes baring into her.
"I told them I'm in love with you," Kim said softly as she gave the woman a watery smile.
"I love you." Shego heard the desperate whisper coming from the living room. She didn't know why it hurt so much to hear when she knew it to be true. Refusing to sit back and wallow, Shego rose abruptly from her chair and made her way to the opening of the kitchen so she could stare at the couple in front of her.
"I love you so much Ron," Kim repeated strongly this time, grabbing his hands to hold them in both of hers. "But...only as a friend. I'm in love with Shego. I'm gay, Ron."
Shego's eyes widened as she heard the words Kim said. She was rooted to the spot as Kim went on to apologize for using the boy as a beard and being too afraid to be honest with him and everyone else. She watched as the boy hugged her close and told her it would be okay. That he would be here for her, however she needed him, just give him time.
Suddenly Ron met Shego's eyes again that night, "Make her happy," he said simply.
Before Shego could reply, Kim finally turned her head to stare lovingly at the woman before her. She outstretched her hand, waiting for the other woman to interlock their fingers before bringing their hands to her lips to kiss the back of her palm. "She does."
Hold on, you tell me that I'm not the one
But you know what is right you say is wrong
Playing with my finger tips
Sitting there biting your lip
Trying to kiss
Who are you trying to trick?
Why don't you just cut the shit?
Not long after, the young man excused himself from the house, informing Kim that he needed a few days to himself. Kim locked the door behind him, still holding tightly to Shego's hand as they stood in the foyer.
"He's a good friend," Shego said as Kim turned to face her.
"Yeah. He is." Kim replied happily.
"He's in love with you." Shego countered.
"Yeah." Kim replied sadly. "He is."
"So am I," Shego admitted aloud for the first time, watching as Kim's eyes sparkled with joy and lips quirked into a smile.
Their lips met in a slow kiss, as Kim wrapped her arms around Shego's neck. Pulling back, Kim shot a challenging smirk her way. "Ready to tell the world?" She asked with a raise of an eyebrow.
Shego snorted as she pulled the girl back in for another kiss. She could feel the other girl melt into her and smiled softly as she heard Kim breathlessly saying she loved her. Bending to swoop the girl in her arms bridal style, Shego carried the girl back into the living room and back up into her bedroom, confident that no matter what tomorrow threw at them, they'd get through it together.
Cause he'll never love you like me