A/N: And here's the second half of the prologue!

As you'll see, I'm going to be following the classical scheme of the Twelve Olympians (a.k.a. the Canonical Twelve) while only focusing on 10 of the 12 in no particular order (therefore 10 Death Note characters in total). So you can expect ten chapters and an epilogue from this point on.

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters.

Prologue: Part Two

"Daddyyyyyyyyyyy!"

Zeus jolted straight up in his bed, roused by the high-pitched wail that resonated throughout the palace. Beside him, Hera stirred.

"What is that dreadful noise?"

"That," grumbled a very cross Hera, "would be your daughter."

Sure enough, Aphrodite came bursting into the reigning couple's chambers, red-faced and fuming. Despite being more enraged than he had ever seen her, the pouting goddess still managed to look better than everyone else on the face of Mount Olympus. Zeus silently marveled at the fact that not even a single golden hair upon his daughter's divinely gorgeous head was out of place.

His wife pulled the silk covers up to her shoulders. "To what do we owe you this displeasure?" Hera demanded waspishly.

"It's gone!" Aphrodite cried. "It was you, wasn't it?"

Hera's lip curled. "What are you talking about?"

"Don't play dumb, you wench! Where is it?"

"Wench? How dare you!"

"QUIET!"

Zeus raised a massive hand, causing the air to crackle with energy – literally. Five blue-silver lightning bolts streaked across the room and flew out the open balcony, accompanied by a loud roll of thunder. His wife and daughter flinched and fell silent.

"That's more like it. Now, Affy, take a deep breath and tell us what happened," he coaxed.

Aphrodite glared down at her stepmother, her fists clenched at her sides. "My apple's gone. Somebody broke through my protective spells somehow and took it!"

Hera's eyes widened in surprise, which quickly transformed into delight. "Oh, glorious day!" she exclaimed. "Whoever it was deserves a medal."

Aphrodite frowned. "So then... it wasn't you?"

"No. I've been in bed the last three days. Just ask your father."

"It's true, sweetheart. Well, actually, bed is a relative term –"

Aphrodite clapped her hands over her ears and glowered at him. Zeus coughed and hastily changed the subject. "Have you tried scrying for it?"

"Duh! What do you think I am, an idiot?" the goddess sniffed. "That's exactly the problem... I can't find it. I can't locate it at all, not even with my mirrors!"

Hera raised a brow. "Strange. Dark forces must be at work."

"D-Dark forces?"

This sent alarm bells ringing in the Olympian ruler's head. But before Zeus could say a word, his charming but ill-tempered daughter opened her big, fat trap once again and the unearthly scream that erupted from her throat bounced out the balcony doors, down the Mount, and expanded into the vast skies, surely reaching every corner of their realm, if not the universe:

"ERIS!"

It hadn't even been an hour since the trouble-loving goddess broke into Aphrodite's not-so-humble abode and made away with the golden prize when she was apprehended by the almighty Zeus himself. It was fair to say that he was less than amused.

Eris soon found herself disarmed, manacled, and chained to a towering pillar like a common slave. Not to mention that this pillar stood at the heart of Mount Olympus's Classical Court, where all twelve Olympians currently hovered above her at their ring of podiums. She peeked up at them through her disarray of dark curls.

Zeus. Hera. Poseidon. Demeter. Athena. Dionysus. Apollo. Artemis. Ares. Hermes. Hephaestus. And last but not least, Aphrodite.

"I gotta say, this is kinda kinky," Eris called out cheerfully, rattling her gilded restraints. However, she couldn't help but wince; the more she struggled or moved, the more the cuffs tightened around her wrists – jinxed links. "H-Hey, this is a bit extreme, don't you think?"

"For you? Nothing is too extreme," came the rumbling reply. "Your punishment is long overdue."

"If you're referring to the Trojan War, don't forget that we all had a little fun with that. Even you, Zeus."

Zap!

Eris yelped when an electric bolt the size of her body struck the stone floor right next to her feet. Her nostrils were suddenly filled with the scent of something akin to molten lava. "Okay, fine, I'll shut up now!"

"Thievery is not tolerated on Olympus, Eris. Return the apple to Aphrodite at once."

The imprisoned goddess shrugged. "I'm afraid I can't do that. You see...I've lost it."

"You what?" Aphrodite shrieked while her family looked on incredulously.

Eris chuckled, soaking up the limelight. They were undoubtedly wondering how she had even managed to get her hands on Aphrodite's precious apple in the first place. Well, loopholes had always been her specialty.

While Aphrodite's enchantments did indeed protect the crystal trophy case from being attacked, they were passive against fellow forms of defense magic, including shielding. It had been a simple matter of casting an illusion over the golden apple and waiting for Aphrodite to notice the "empty" case. When she did, the temperamental goddess had gone berserk and smashed the case to bits in a fit of rage, leaving Eris free to whisk away the invisible Apple of Discord while Aphrodite fled to the palace to seek out her father like the brat she was.

"You heard me," Eris replied. "It's no longer in my possession. I, ah, accidentally dropped it into the human world."

Her statement was met with several gasps.

"It wasn't accidental at all, was it?" the great and wise Athena snapped.

Eris answered this with another question: "If fate is the sum of accidents, what exactly qualifies as an accident?"

"Cut the philosophical crap. You're embarrassing yourself," Athena said coldly. "I'd wager a city that you were hoping we'd actually care about it enough to play fetch for your amusement."

Bingo.

Eris, feeling very much like the cat that swallowed the canary, sat back and watched as the inevitable and unfailingly entertaining bickering unfolded before her.

Just as planned.

Aphrodite was furious. She should've known that Athena wouldn't actively support her, especially since it involved the apple, the main source of their rivalry. The only reason that Athena was even there was because their father was such a stickler for tradition.

"We can't afford to launch a manhunt into the mortal realm. Look at it logically. It's only gold, and it has no magical properties. It's not worth pursuing." Well, someone was still jealous and bitter!

To Aphrodite's annoyance, the rest of the Classical Court began to murmur in agreement. Luckily for her, she had a proverbial ace hidden up her sleeve.

"If you don't help me find it, I'll eradicate the human race," the vengeful goddess of love, beauty and sexuality announced. "I'll make men fall in love with dogs, and women with birds. Disease will ravage the earth and populations will dwindle, and no longer will you have Athens at your feet!" The last part, of course, was directed at Athena.

Zeus looked worried. "Affy, you can't mean that."

"Oh, but I do! Athena may be right about it being only made of gold, but everyone knows it means the world to me. The question now is… who will join me?"

"We can't leave Olympus," Zeus and Hera said simultaneously, "but the rest of you can."

A chorus of groans, mingled with the erratic laughter of a certain captive, rose from the celestial court. Aphrodite smiled triumphantly. Nobody could argue against Zeus; his word was always final.

"Can't we just rip everyone apart limb from limb until we find the damn apple?" the bloodthirsty Ares wanted to know.

"This will be a covert mission. We cannot interfere with innocent human lives," Athena said stiffly.

"Where do we start?" Dionysus asked excitedly.

His question stumped the group. To everyone's surprise, it was Eris who finally broke the silence.

"Obviously, you should start with those who deserve it the most," Eris said sleekly. "To the fairest. I wonder what that could mean!"

The reaction was instantaneous.

"Oh boy," Zeus sighed, "here we go again."

"That'd be the loveliest," Aphrodite declared.

"No, the wisest," Athena argued.

"The civilest," Demeter cut in.

"Only the bravest," Ares shouted.

"The kindest," Hermes admonished.

"I'd say the brightest," Apollo interjected just as Artemis piped up with, "The purest."

"The humblest," Hephaestus proposed.

"The coolest," Poseidon yawned, clearly bored.

"Whoever's the funnest," Dionysus cheered.

"That's not even a word," Athena retorted, causing Dionysus to blush and rub his head sheepishly. "Anyway, seems like we're not getting anywhere with this."

"I think it'll be best if we split up," Apollo suggested, throwing a sideways glance at his twin sister.

Artemis nodded. "Yes," she said serenely. "The faster we find it, the faster we can get back to business."

And so it was decided.

A/N: That was pretty fun to write. Matching them was definitely the "funnest" part ;)

I'm still debating whether or not to change the title of this fic. "Museum" is supposed to represent "character study" and the passive observance of the characters as though they were exhibits. "Museum" is not going to be a literal, physical building. I'll eventually make that clearer by the end of the fic, though ^_^

Hope you liked it, and thanks for the great reviews so far! Stay tuned for more :D