After Angus breathed some life back into both Gregg and himself by suggesting an adoption, the couple went out and ate breakfast. There was silence as the weight of their grief refused to disappear. Myriad emotions ran rampant in both of their heads, making it almost impossible to start a coherent conversation. Luckily, amongst all of the sadness, there was some hope now at least.
Once they had finished eating breakfast, Gregg got up, "I think we should go talk to Mae and Bea. I know they're probably wondering what happened."
"That's probably a good idea.", agreed Angus, taking both of their dishes out into the kitchen and placing them in the sink to wash later.
They walked downstairs to where Mae and Bea's room was, Gregg knocking on the door once they got there. An exhausted-looking Bea opened the door, rubbing her eyes like she had just woken up.
"Oh, Angus, Gregg! Uh, how are you?", she asked nervously.
"We just wanted to talk to you about… you know…", started Angus, but he couldn't finish. Bea cut him off.
"Yeah, I get it. Come on in. I'll go wake Mae up." Bea began walking to her and Mae's room.
"Oh, if you two are still sleeping, we can come back later.", said Angus.
"I actually just got up. Don't worry about it. I'm sure that Mae would rather talk sooner than later.", assured Bea, as she exited from view, leaving Gregg and Angus to sit down on the couch in the living room. They could hear Bea quietly waking Mae up. Mae resisted a bit, but when Bea told her that Gregg and Angus were there, all they heard were the sounds of Mae quickly getting up and getting dressed in some decent clothes.
Mae was the first to come out into the living room, "Hi, guys. So, how have you been doing?" She looked much worse than Bea, like she had been up all night.
"As well as can be expected, I guess.", replied Angus.
Mae looked at Gregg, "I… heard you crying last night, Gregg. Are you okay?"
Gregg's eyes drifted away from Mae's gaze, "Not really. It was a… bad night."
"What even happened? Is the baby okay? It didn't… die, right?", asked Mae cautiously.
"No, no, nothing like that.", said Angus.
"Samantha took the baby from us.", said Gregg.
"What? Why?", asked Bea.
"She never gave us a reason. She wouldn't even let us see her. We were turned away by a doctor."
"What the hell?! She can't just do that!", said Mae angrily.
"That's what I said."
"After all of the work you put in, she's just gonna turn around and screw you like that?!"
"Yeah, that about sums it up.", said Gregg.
"Screw her! She could have at least told you before she gave birth or before you spent all of that time and money getting your apartment ready for the baby!"
"It's not like we can do anything about it now. We just need to move on.", said Angus.
"So, what now?", asked Bea, "What's the plan?"
Angus exchanged looks with Gregg before deciding it was okay to speak, "We're going to try again."
"Really? You're gonna try for another baby?", questioned Mae.
"No. We're doing it differently this time. We're going to look into adoption."
"That means they're not going to be your biological child, then.", Bea pointed out.
"That doesn't matter. There's less risk involved here. We won't need to worry about something like this happening again.", said Angus
"So, you're just going to try again? Are we just going to forget about what happened? Are you just going to forget about your baby?!", asked Mae, angry that they seemed to be moving on so quickly.
"They're not ours anymore!", yelled Gregg, "And of course, we're not just forgetting about them! It's just that there's nothing we can do anymore! It's over." Gregg ended up being the first in the conversation to begin crying.
"I'm sorry. That was out of line.", apologized Mae. She was getting better at learning how to draw back her emotion-fueled comments, but she wasn't completely there yet. The therapy had been helping, though.
"No, it's fine. We're all really emotional right now.", said Angus, rubbing Gregg's back to calm him down.
"So, when are you guys planning on adopting?", asked Mae.
"I'm not sure. Probably as soon as possible if Gregg's okay with it.", replied Angus.
"I'm ready when you are. I want to do this.", said Gregg with resolve in his voice.
"I guess that means we're starting today, then."
"Okay. You can leave whenever. Thanks for taking the time to fill us in.", said Bea.
"No problem. I do think we should get going. It was nice talking to you.", replied Angus. He stood up, motioning for Gregg to leave with him.
"Later, dudes.", said Gregg, markedly less depressed than he seemed when he walked in. Angus seemed less depressed as well. The hope for another chance allowed them to keep their heads held high through everything.
Gregg and Angus left, leaving Mae and Bea alone.
"I still can't believe it.", said Mae.
"I know, Maeday. I'm sure it'll work out.", replied Bea.
"Gregg and Angus didn't deserve it. They're so good."
"I know they are. Look, come here." Bea motioned for Mae to scoot up next to her, and Mae complied.
Bea wrapped her arm around Mae, "Everything's going to be fine, okay?"
"…Okay."
There was silence for a few moments.
"So, what now?", asked Mae.
"Let's just sit here for a little while.", said Bea.
"I'm good with that."
Gregg and Angus went back up to their apartment. When they got inside, Angus went over to his computer.
"What are you doing?", asked Gregg, following him.
"I'm going to look up some local adoption agencies is. We can contact one tomorrow.", answered Angus, turning on his computer and opening up his web browser.
"Tomorrow? Why not today? We have time.", questioned Gregg.
"I think we need a break today. We've been through a lot. Thrusting ourselves into this probably isn't a good idea. We need time to recover so that we'll be at our best."
Gregg wanted to protest, but he knew Angus was right. They would have people to impress. If they couldn't convince the right people they were capable parents, they wouldn't be able to get a child at all. There would be interviews to go through and paperwork to fill out. They couldn't afford to screw this up.
"Fine.", Gregg said.
In a few moments, Angus was able to locate an adoption center in Bright Harbor. He wrote down the phone number and address and placed it into his wallet.
"There. We should be set now.", said Angus.
"So, what now?", asked Gregg.
"I'm not sure. I don't really feel like playing video games right now."
Gregg pondered for a moment before coming up with an idea, "Movie night?"
"But it's not night.", replied Angus satirically.
Gregg walked around covering up all of the windows with whatever he could find, like blankets and sheets, until it was dark throughout the house.
"There. It's night now.", he said matter-of-factly.
Angus actually laughed a bit at Gregg's display, "Alright. Movie night it is, then."
The two spent the rest of the day watching various movies together. It helped to alleviate the sorrow they were feeling. The entire time, they cuddled together on the couch, wrapped in a blanket. Eventually, they both found themselves dozing off. Looking at the time, it was almost 9 at night. They actually spent the entire day watching movies.
"I think it's time to go to bed. We have a busy day tomorrow.", said Angus.
"Agreed. How can I be so tired from just sitting and watching movies?", asked Gregg.
"Who knows? It's just our biology, I guess."
They both got up and went to their bed. They lied down, ready to sleep, but something was keeping them up.
"Cap'n, are you asleep yet?", whispered Gregg.
"No."
"I can't sleep."
"Me, neither."
"I'm just so stressed about this adoption stuff."
"I know. Me, too."
"What if we're not good enough?", asked Gregg.
"What? Why wouldn't we be good enough?"
"I don't know. It's probably just anxiety or something.", replied Gregg dismissively.
"Gregg, there's no such thing as 'just' anxiety. There is no just about it. Now, what's worrying you?"
"I don't know. It's just I was preparing myself so much for this baby. I felt so ready. I built up all of this stress and worry, and just as I'm about to get through it, they're just taken away from us! I don't know if I can do that again!", said Gregg, beginning to cry again.
"That's not going to happen again. We're adopting. We don't have to go through the stress of waiting for them to be born this time."
"But so many other things can go wrong! What if I screw something up, and something happens to them?!"
"That's not going to happen, either.", replied Angus, "I know you wouldn't let anything hurt them. I mean, you almost got yourself killed trying to save some random stranger!"
"Yeah, and that was stupid! I almost left you, and Mae, and Bea, and everyone else behind for some guy I didn't even know! Mae and Bea almost broke up because of me! What if I die, and I leave you alone with our child because I do something like that again?!"
"Gregg, you can't worry about dying like that. We're all gonna die someday, and we don't really have any control over when that happens. As long as you don't throw yourself into deadly situations every day for no reason, you can't feel like it's your fault."
"It doesn't even have to be our fault that something bad happens to them, though. Sure, maybe I won't screw up, but so many other things could happen. What if the people at the orphanage just don't think we're fit to be parents? Then, we're screwed! Or, what if we get to know our new child, and then the original family comes back and makes us give them up? I can't lose another child, Angus! I can't do it again!"
Angus pulled Gregg in tighter and let him cry into him, "Those things aren't going to happen, Gregg. The chances of the original family coming back are slim at best. There's a reason those children are up for adoption. Their parents either aren't around, aren't able to take care of their child with what they have, or their parents just don't care. Besides, by the time the adoption process is over, we'll be the ones with custody over them, so even if the parents did come back, they wouldn't be able to take them from us."
"But what if they just don't let us have a child in the first place?", asked Gregg.
"That would only happen if they thought we weren't capable parents."
"What if I'm not good enough?!"
"There's no reason you aren't good enough. 6 years ago, maybe not, but you've grown so much since we moved here. I know we're ready. There are so many things that could go wrong, but we can't obsess over them. They're only things that could go wrong, not things that will go wrong, and if there's anything preventable that could harm our child, I know you'll step up, and I'll do my best to step up, too."
There was a pause. The crying stopped, but Gregg's breath was still shaky, "I don't really see how I've grown up at all since we moved. I've spent the past 24 hours crying while you were actually getting stuff done. When we we're at the hospital and I almost got security called on us, you actually acted responsible and got me to stop. I'm still the same, immature piece of shit I was 6 years ago. I thought I was past it, but as soon as something bad happened, I started acting like an idiot again."
"Gregg, you have every right to cry and be angry right now. This isn't an easy thing to go through. Sure, I may be the 'responsible one', but the only reason I can bring myself to act responsibly all the time is because of you. If it were just me, I would still be stuck in Possum Springs without the motivation to get anything done."
"I haven't actually done anything, though."
"That's not true. When you were recovering from almost dying, you were the one who comforted me when I couldn't stop thinking about it. You're the one who suggested we become parents in the first place. You're the one who finally got me to leave my shitty mother for good." Angus raised his hand, showing Gregg the engagement ring he got him, "You're the one who went out of his way to buy this really expensive ring when I would have been fine with anything. I married you for a reason. You're an amazing person."
"…Really? You mean it?", asked Gregg.
"Of course. You're an amazing person, and you'll be an amazing father. I promise."
"Okay. If you really think that, then I'll do my best to live up to it."
"Good. I will, too. Now, do you think you'll be able to get some sleep now?", asked Angus.
"Yeah. Yeah, I think I could sleep.", replied Gregg.
"Alright, then. I love you, Bug."
"I love you, too, cap'n."
"Goodnight.", said Angus.
"Goodnight.", said Gregg.
Sleep came with ease after that. Gregg's worries didn't disappear, but Angus was there to bear the weight with him, and that was enough. Tomorrow would be the start of a new journey, one that they were both ready for.
