Come find me
It hasn't felt like this before
It hasn't felt like home, before you
And I know it's easy to say
But it's harder to feel, this way
And I miss you more than I should
Than I thought I would
Can't get my mind off you
I know you're scared that I'll soon be over it
That's part of if all
Part of the beauty of falling in love with you
Is the fear you won't fall
It was late, nearing midnight. Heavy curtains were drawn around the bed against both the chill of the night air and the shining light of the moon. Despite the hour, neither the Queen or her Prince were asleep – though she couldn't see him, shrouded as they were in complete darkness, she knew.
"I don't think we should."
"Breha... I know how you feel. But now more than ever... we have to seem... we have to seem as if all is well."
"I'm afraid, Bail. If anyone were to suspect –"
"That is why we must not act as though we have anything to hide. Holding a ball now, the Emperor will see it as support, and the best thing we can do is to look as though we support the new Empire. Besides that – Breha – I will not live in fear. I will not sacrifice our traditions, our way of life..."
"I... I know. Bail... There's more, isn't there?"
"Yes... Anti-Imperial protests are inevitable, I know that, but if there is to be a true resistance, we have to bide our time, work covertly. I've heard reports of other factions of resistance in the galaxy, and it gives me hope for the future, but if they attract too much attention now, the Emperor will crush them swiftly... and easily."
"Bail... what can that possibly have to do with holding a ball?"
"I can send coded messages in some of the invitations to those leaders I can contact openly without suspicion. And a few others, as well – Aala, hopefully."
"Aala?"
"She can make contact with those I cannot. Her skill with people and... staying unnoticed, has always been invaluable to me. If we can build connections – garner support and exchange information quietly, I think we have a chance. This is the safest way to contact her; the safest way to ask this of her. No one could suspect..."
"Then I suppose... we're having a ball."
His Serene Highness, Prince Consort Bail Prestor Organa
and
Queen Breha Organa of Alderaan
cordially invite you to the annual Royal Ball
in honor of
the Royal Family, House Organa
To take place in the Grand Ballroom of Aldera Royal Palace, Alderaan
16:11:11
The invitations to the Royal Ball on Alderaan were planned and prepared months ahead of time. Swirly white lettering and simple decorative embellishments were etched onto individual pieces of expensive, frosted flimsiplast.
Instead of being sent as data messages, they were to be delivered – a tradition dating back hundreds of years to a time when invitations to the Royal Ball were written on parchment and hand delivered by royal couriers across all of Alderaan.
Nothing was as important to Bail Organa in these critical moments as keeping up appearances.
Each of the invitations was couture, unique to the recipient. The differences were minute in many cases: a slight difference in a decorative border perhaps; unnoticeable unless compared. Some were styled to reflect the culture of the home world of the invited guest, while some were more personalized, and others, a few in particular, more unique yet...
They were posted well in advance. The galaxy was not what it used to be. Bail could only hope his impeccable Imperial voting record thus far had kept him far above any suspicions.
It was only a ball, one that had occurred on the same date annually for hundreds of years, but the Emperor had been dogged and Bail worried still, despite the odds in his favor. It was clear anyone or anything short of whole-hearted support of the New Order would not be tolerated.
Delivery from Alderaan wasn't an issue, but all messages whether data or otherwise, were being monitored, scanned and checked for any indication of sympathy towards the resistance or any type of treasonous proclivities. So the invitations were loaded on a freighter and routed through Coruscant for investigation, as all letters were.
Responsibility for this task fell to Surveillance, the largest branch of the Imperial Security Bureau which had been formed from the previous Internal Security Bureau.
But everyone was suspected. Everyone was being watched. The original purpose for the formation of the ISB under the Galactic Empire was, in fact, to check Imperial Intelligence, which had been formed from SBI, Aala's former place of employment.
The innocuous and identical wording of each invitation made the progress through Surveillance relatively easy - save the one, the only one, that was addressed to Naboo. That alone wasn't enough to raise suspicion, but the destination was.
It was reported most recently that leaders on Naboo, Queen Apailana specifically, had possibly been aiding and harboring, not only rebels, but Jedi. Monitoring of the entire sector, including messages sent and received, was on the highest alert and this invitation in particular was singled out for further inspection before delivery.
Rumor had it, though, that the boys at Surveillance (and it was almost entirely made up of human males) weren't the brightest. Lucky for the rebellion.
"I'm going to Alderaan."
Aala clenched her hands at her sides, determined not to fidget as her father looked up from his work. She hadn't meant to blurt that out, but there it was.
Sola had been away for two years, Padmé had joined the Apprentice Legislature and Aala was 15 now. He had told her to figure her life out – well that was what she was doing – this was what she had decided.
The soft glow from his desk lamp cast the small room in a mixture of dim golden light and dark shadows, but she could see his face clearly as he regarded her with his all-knowing gaze.
She lifted her chin, strengthening her resolve, as he leaned forward on his forearms over his desk.
But then his expression softened and she felt the tension in her shoulders ease.
"Aala," he said, his voice calm. "Come sit down." He pulled his high-backed reading chair from the corner of the room so it was closer to his desk.
"What would you like to do on Alderaan?" he asked of her after she had perched on the edge of the old leather chair.
"I want to go to the University," she answered, sitting stock-still and trying not to sound petulant.
"What would you like to study?" His gaze was so steady, so discerning, she felt he could see right through her.
"I'm not sure, exactly... I just want to – um... learn." I don't know what I want. I just know it's not here. In a nervous gesture, her hand lifted to run through her fair hair, her every-day physical reminder that she was different from her sisters. "I've done well, my marks are high... I just think I'm ready for something different."
His expression warmed at the mention of her grades, and he gave her an encouraging smile. "I'm very proud of you Aala, and you have done well the past two years."
Pausing for a moment, he seemed to be contemplating something, but despite herself, she couldn't help it. She twisted her hands together in her lap as he watched her. He's going to say no. He's going to ask me to explain myself. But I know I need... more... I know there's something out there for me...
Finally, he spoke again. "If it's what you want..."
"Yes, dad. Very much," she answered quietly.
"Then it sounds like a good idea to me."
Clear morning light shone through the wide glass windows into the modest living room. Quietness permeated the cozy room, peaceful but anticipative all the same. The only distraction, tiny specks of dust caught in a brilliant streak of light, floated gently to the floor.
Aala sat on her parent's comfortable couch, leaning forward a little and holding a simple piece of flimsi a delivery droid had brought very early that morning.
So simple, but so much weight resting on her reply.
She'd said yes, she told him she would come, she wanted to come, but – it would mean leaving behind her family, her nieces, her grandmother to whom she'd recently become so close, the peace and quiet of home...
...and the boredom that crept up on her even as she enjoyed the company of her mother and father, the loneliness that seeped in late at night, the feeling that she wasn't doing what she could to help... and it hadn't even been a year yet.
She read the words again, noting every elegant detail, and then she ran her fingernail over the tiny lines and shapes that made up the trim border etched onto the thin flimsi – they were letters, she was sure, almost indiscernible, small and pressed together, words, in code. She would need to magnify it to be sure – to read the message, but it was clear to her Bail felt it urgent.
Sighing to herself, she let her gaze settle outside the window as she lost herself in thought.
"You're leaving."
"Father." Aala said it as much in surprise as in admonition.
"You have that look in your eye – you're somewhere far, far away," he continued, coming to stand in front of her.
"No, I'm not." The corner of her mouth lifted in a half smile. "I'm right here. I –"
Folding his arms across his chest, he gave her that look – there was no use pretending, not with him.
"I recognize the expression, Aala," he smiled at her. "Padmé always had it. Sola never had it... "
Aala laughed softly. "And me? Always somewhere in the middle?"
"There's nothing wrong with being uncertain, Aala. I should've told you that a long time ago." He seemed to be deep in thought then and Aala didn't say anything. "I often wondered – especially after the accident, you were all alone, and I wasn't sure I had made the right decision, letting you go to Alderaan."
"Dad... you couldn't have known –"
He stopped her with that look again. "But you've done so well. At the time I decided to let you find your own way and I wouldn't change that. You've always been the type to go where the river takes you."
He sat down next to her then, the serious expression still on his face, but it melted away to a warmer one when he turned to regard her again. "I know you're not a girl anymore, but I'm still you're father. If you'd like to talk about it..."
Aala sighed, looking at the flimsi in her hand again. She was quiet for a few long moments. It was true, she had always went along with whatever life brought.
Maybe it was time for something different she decided, finally glancing up at her father. "The river is flowing in a direction I don't really want to go in..."
"Ah... time to jump ship?"
"Maybe..."
"Treacherous waters, those."
She nodded. "But I can't do nothing, right?"
He shifted, clasping his hands in front of him. "Aala, taking care of your family isn't doing nothing," he said, his tone thoughtful.
Luke. Leia.
Obi-Wan and Bail were taking care of her family, she was doing nothing.
Obi-Wan.
"Unless, you have family out there I don't know about?"
The flicker of fatherly concern in his eyes told her just what he was getting at. "Sola said something, didn't she?"
At least he had the decency to look chagrined. "She might've mentioned something in passing..."
Aala sighed, leaning back into the cushions of the couch.
"...to your mother. Which I might've overheard."
"Ahh." How do I explain a secret love affair with a fugitive Jedi, THE fugitive Jedi, to my father...
"I don't want to pry..." he conceded, but he looked at her with such a hopefully expectant expression she couldn't help but smile.
Fidgeting with a silver ring on her finger, she thought for a moment about what to say. "We were friends," she said. "Good friends, for a long time. And... then we realized we loved each other. But... it was too late."
"He..." Ruwee began, but did not finish the question.
Aala closed her eyes as she took a breath. "He's okay."
"But he's not here."
Aala exhaled. "He can't. He's – he just can't." She would not, could not endanger her family any more.
"I'm sorry I won't meet him," Ruwee said quietly.
Her eyes pricked and she ducked her head. "I'm sorry, too."
Leaning forward, he kissed her forehead. "Just promise I'll see you again."
"Of course, dad. I won't be gone long. I – I'll be back. I promise."
He brushed her hair away from her face, reminding her how often he had done that when she was young, and cast her one more fatherly smile before he rose and left her alone.
Aala took a deep cleansing breath, and the empty ache of feeling lost began to ebb just a little.
Well, I guess that's my decision made.
Obi-Wan lifted the hood of his cloak over his face and set out on the long journey from his hut into Anchorhead, a path he knew well already.
Leaving Tatooine this soon had not been in his plans. Honestly, he hadn't planned on leaving Tatooine at all. He might've allowed himself a minute or two to dream about escaping to some back water, Force saturated, tropical planet, if only for a brief reprieve from the harsh unforgiving climate of a dessert with two suns, but he had never expected it.
It seemed though, somehow, it was the will of the Force. And he couldn't deny a friend in need of help. Ferus Olin was alive, and that fact alone gave him new hope.
For a brief moment, he allowed thoughts of a more emotional nature to cross his mind. Would he see her? Should he seek her out?
If he was honest, it had been a lonely, desolate stretch of time in the desert, and it hadn't even been a year yet.
No. It was dangerous. Too dangerous.
And she deserved this time with her family. She deserved the chance to choose a normal, quiet life. He wasn't going to fool himself. If possible, he had even less to offer her now than he had before. Perhaps she had moved on already.
But if she did ever decide she still wanted him...
He would reach out to her in his heart, and as always, let the Force be his guide.
~TBC...
Disclaimers: Lyrics are from The Fear You Won't Fall by Joshua Radin. Events from The Last of The Jedi series written by Jude Watson will be referenced throughout this story – all those ideas are owned by *not me*. I make no profit from any of this and no infringement of rights is intended.
AN: As mentioned in the disclaimer, some of the things that happen in The Last of the Jedi series will be mentioned throughout this story – though, for the most part, only in so much as the affect they have on Aala. I appreciate having the structure of other things happening in the galaxy as a sort of frame of reference for my characters, and the ideas seemed to fit well with the type of story I wanted to tell with Aala. I have not, however, read that series, just researched the events and characters to great length on wookiepedia.
For now, I'm treating those ideas as I would canon from the movies, I'm not trying to claim them as my own in anyway, just using them as established galaxy events, and exploring their affect through my OC. I'm happy to point out what I've used from that series in each part if anyone is curious, just ask :)
Many thanks to laloga for her fabulous beta work and constant support, as always. This would not turn out so well without you! Thanks also to Valairy Scot for some helpful tips when experiencing writer's block, the first part with Bail and Breha sprung from a comment she gave me, and it helped a ton.
Please review! All types of comments are welcome, and it's always very appreciated. Thanks for reading!