Bilbo was… drunk. Unbelievably, stinking, drunk. She could hardly believe it. She'd never gotten seriously hammered before, just enough to feel the buzz, but never so smashed she could barely walk. The heels weren't helping either, so as soon as they got inside she grabbed Thorin's arm and pulled them off. Without them, she was about a head shorter than him.

She stumbled and pulled him off balance, and as he caught her, he leaned forward and started kissing her in a way that made her shiver. It was long and deep and desperate, like she was the only thing holding him to this world, and she gasped as she pulled back and looked into his face. He looked at her, eyes dark with lust and staring at her like she was a delectable morsel he wanted to devour. Her eyes widened a little and he growled, a low, feral sound deep in hi throat before leaning in again with another searing kiss.

They stumbled backwards towards her bedroom where Thorin sat on the edge of her futon and pulled her onto his lap. He reached behind her and unzipped the now wrinkled ivory dress, and Bilbo wriggled a little, letting it slip off her body onto the floor. Thorin's eyes raked up and down her body, taking in her slim figure and her mismatched underwear. He pulled her back into his embrace and started undoing the back of her bra before feeling her sliding off his lap precariously.

He looked at her, eyes heavy with lust and confusion. "What's wrong? Don't you want to?"

She couldn't look at him, but instead put her head in between her knees. "I'm ssssorrry… I don't I don't feel too good…" Her voice was slurring and she felt dizzy. She knew she was going to pass out at any moment.

Thorin looked at her until a realization dawned, and boy, was it unpleasant. "You are completely smashed, aren't you." It was more of a statement than a question, and despite holding off after seeing how awful she was feeling (obviously she wasn't a big drinker and had had a lot that night), he was still deliberating convincing her anyways. He was interrupted by a buzz coming from his pocket, which made up his mind.

He got his phone out of his pocket with difficulty, turning to see Bilbo curled up on the bed, face peaceful and innocent in sleep, and answered the call.

"Hello?"

"Thorin? Hey, I know I promised not to call you unless it was emergency, but…" Bofur's voice was tinged with panic and Thorin sighed.

"It's all right. How serious is it?"

Thorin could hear Bofur's breath catch as he described the situation at home.

"Uh huh. Yeah. It's no problem, really… right. No, I swear, it's fine. Just send a car to… hold on a sec-" at this Thorin glanced out the window to check the address- "Shire apartments, 1401 Hobbiton road. There's a sign on the door that says Bag End, should be easy enough to find. Oh, and it's apartment number 15."

Thorin hung up and looked back at Bilbo, now stretched out a little on the bed. He sighed and lifted her up slightly, tucking her under the covers and tying her hair back from her face.

"I do not envy you the hangover you will have tomorrow," he whispered to her. She sighed a little in her sleep, as if she could hear him, and turned over. He chuckled, though still disappointed, and went to her small kitchen to fill a glass of water for her almost certain hangover tomorrow.

Collecting his jacket off the floor, he sat at her table, scribbling a small note on a napkin before settling down to wait for Bofur.

Bilbo awoke with a splitting headache and foul taste in her mouth. She groaned to herself and put her arm over her face to protect her sensitive eyes from the harsh sunlight pouring through her window. Suddenly, memories of the night before assaulting her mind, she sat up and her eyes flew open. She groaned and spasmed, the pain in her body for the moment overpowering the mortification she felt regarding the night before.

She slowly stretched her body out on the bed again, her eye wide as she tried to remember details. Had she really been… giggling? She never gigged! Oh, lord. She was never going to tell anyone about this, ever. As a terrible thought struck her she froze in place, arms still spread out on the messy sheets. She hadn't… slept with the man, had she? She wasn't that kind of girl! There was no way she would have lost her virginity to some random stranger she met at a club, but she had also thought that she wasn't the kind of girl to bring home random strangers… she groaned to herself, on the verge of tears.

She glanced over on her night table to check her clock and saw… a glass of water? She certainly hadn't put that there. Not caring where it came from, she grabbed it and took a sip. The lukewarm water felt like heaven inside her dry and smelly mouth, and went down her throat like nectar.

Feeling slightly better, she got out of bed and headed into the bathroom, where she winced at her own reflection. Bilbo got out her toothbrush and extra strong toothpaste and started brushing while trying not to look at herself. Her hair was a tangled mess, the auburn curls frizzing up and falling in her face. She had bags under her eyes and her skin looked pale, though that was probably just a side effect of the hangover. She groaned again and spat into the sink, her mouth buzzing with peppermint.

As she stumbled into the kitchen, Bilbo saw a small piece of paper on the table with writing on it. She went over and picked it up, reading the message scrawled on it.

Took you home, didn't do anything more than kiss you, scout's honor. Tucked you in and set up a glass of water for you. If you need anything, call me at 240-353-8053. –Thorin O.

Bilbo could have started in happiness right then and there, but she just sat down and closed her eyes against the flood of relief. She thought she might have felt different somehow afterwards, if she really had… lost it… last night, but you never knew.

Feeling a lot lighter, she started making herself a quick breakfast. Lots of grease- the grease helps, she reminded herself. The finished product was a couple eggs and sausages that were practically transparent. Sighing, she sat down to eat, and made a note to herself to call Thorin later and thank him.