Ch. 2 Breathe

I see your face in my mind as I drive away. Cause none of us thought it was gonna end that way. People are people and sometimes we change our minds. But it's killing me to see you go after all this time.

It seemed like years before I wasn't confined to the couch anymore. I'd spent each day snapping at a new member of the pack before they all got sick of it and left; everybody except for Seth that is. The first day he came, Leah was with him, probably just for support or something. Or maybe some part of her actually felt guilty for putting me in the situation in the first place. Though I doubted it. In any case, after I threatened to rip her head off she left. But Seth stayed; he actually thought it was funny. I swear nothing bothers that kid. Every snap, eye roll, insult, he just let it roll off his shoulders and grinned at me. It annoyed the hell out of me because he didn't get it. I wanted everyone to leave me. It would just make it easier when I left everybody else.

Then finally, finally I got the okay to be up and around again. I was supposed to take it slow, but that wasn't exactly what I had in mind. The only problem was, Seth was attached to me at the hip. Every movement I made, he made it at the exact same time, it was like having a shadow that could talk and annoy me.

"Do you need help, Jake?"

"Can I get you something, Jake?"

"Maybe you shouldn't be walking so much just yet, Jake."

I loved him like my own brother, I really did, but I was ready to throttle him. At the same time, he looked up to me, looked at me like I had all the answers, which god knows wasn't true, and that made me feel guilty for what I was about to do, which was leave.

It went on like this for days, until I finally got fed up. I had made up my mind a long time ago and feeling guilty for leaving my pack wasn't going to stop me. I could go on forever being miserable and making everybody around me miserable or I could break off and keep my problems to myself. It seemed like a no brainer.

It was two in the morning when I decided to go, not to be theatrical or anything, making my great escape in the dead of the night; I just wanted to make sure I wasn't going to be followed. I also avoided phasing for obvious reasons. That could wait until I was far enough away that it didn't matter anymore.

I ran on two legs, swiftly and quietly through dense forest. It felt good; of course, not as good as it would have felt as a wolf, but close. As I prepared to leave my own world behind, I decided there was one last stop I needed to make, because as much as I needed to get away, I couldn't fight the addiction that was Bella.

I climbed up her window with ease without even thinking about it before the smell hit me. The realization hit me like a ton of bricks. My last memory of Bella was going to be of her and her leech. I couldn't help it though; I needed to see her face, just one last time. I'd thought our goodbye was going to be enough but it hadn't been. That longing in my heart was like the pull of gravity, but instead of pulling me down, it was pulling me to her.

"Jacob."

I heard my name well before I was through the window and standing in her room. The parasite sounded displeased that I was here, but I figured as soon as he heard what was on my mind his mood would change drastically and he would be happy as a clam.

I nodded towards him and a look of realization crossed his features. I paid no attention to him anymore, tried to block out his arm holding her close, the way she seemed to sleep so peacefully in his embrace and memorized her features.

"You can't do this Jacob." Edward's voice was quiet in his attempt not to wake Bella and I sighed as I reluctantly looked his way.

"I thought you'd understand," I said, my voice honestly surprised. Was Edward really that selfish that he wouldn't let me just see Bella one last time? "Just… let me have this, okay? You win. I get it. I'm out of here as soon as I'm done here."

"You misunderstand me," Edward whispered, "You cannot leave her. It will make her unhappy, she has an… attachment to you."

I looked at Edward, feeling an unimaginable rage growing inside me as I comprehended what this stupid bloodsucker was saying. He wasn't mad that I was here right now, he was made that I was leaving? Because it would make Bella unhappy? Because she wanted it both ways and was mad that she couldn't have it? What about my happiness? What about the pain that I had to deal with every single day? Seeing them together was like a constant beat down, and once I thought it couldn't get any worse, I was kicked again. I had nothing left to give. Nothing.

"I suppose it is selfish of me to ask this of you," Edward said. He'd obviously been listening to my inner rant, "But when it comes to what Bella wants, well… There's nothing I wouldn't ask of anybody. I can't deny her of anything."

I'd heard enough. With a scoff I turned away. "She made her choice. She chose you." The words still stung, saying them out loud, even though I'd thought them in my head a million times. "She doesn't need me."

"In her own way she does," Edward argued, trying to maneuver out of her grasp.

"Stop it. You're gonna wake her up," I snapped. I couldn't deal with that now, if she begged me to stay, I wouldn't be able to leave.

"Let her say goodbye to you. It will hurt her deeply if she can't," Edward was practically begging me now and I shook my head.

"I said my goodbye already, I can't do it again."

Besides, there was only one goodbye that I could think of that would be absolutely perfect, and one, it would require her consent which wasn't going to happen, and two, I wasn't here to start an all out war.

Edward heard those thoughts loud and clear and I could hear his seething hiss as he tried to keep himself composed. "Goodbye Jacob," Edward said through gritted teeth.

"Stupid bloodsucker," I muttered, and was out the window before another word could be spoken.

The story will pick up and have more action after this, but this back story is necessary. I hope you liked the second chapter, thanks for reading :)