This chap wasn't me!
"Look, the bottom line is, never, ever split up. We have to stay together."
Little did Tony know, that nobody would listen. But really, who ever does?
"Why don't we all just, um, go back to the van?" suggested Natasha, looking around. "Yeah," Clint shuddered, "If Tony's hearing voices and someone's trying to give Steve the Columbian Necktie, then we should get back to safety!"
"Columbian Necktie…" Thor murmured, "I do not understand." "What I tried to give you that time when I turned 1,006 and you ate my piece of cake," Loki whispered to him, and Thor nodded in vague understanding.
"No," Tony said firmly, a vengeful look crossing over his face as he tightened his fist, "We're staying here. We're gonna avenge Bruce, and hunt this thing down. We'll teach this- whatever this thing is, that they shouldn't be messing with the Avengers!"
"Rousing speech, Stark," Loki drawled sarcastically, crossing his arms and leaning against a tree, "Shall we all charge into Camelot now?" Tony clenched his jaw, and Steve giggled a little. "I understood that -" "Not now, Steve," Natasha whispered.
"Nonetheless, if we stay out here, we'll end up like Banner," Loki continued, gesturing languidly at the body before them. "You guys go then," Tony said, sighing. "But, what about that whole no splitting up thing?" Clint asked nervously. Tony looked at both of them. "Well, there's two of you, and you're basically Bonnie and Clyde, so…" Natasha and Clint looked at each other, and slowly backed up. "Uh…then… we're gonna…" "Just gonna…" "Go…" "Yeah."
They took off through the forest back to the van, and Steve scoffed, puffing out his chest despite his violent shivering. "A-And they call themselves master assassins." Suddenly, an owl hooted again, and he screamed. "Hit the dirt!" he screeched, throwing himself to the ground army-style, and the three left just stared at him. Steve looked around, and got up, clearing his throat and straightening his clothes. "What?" he asked with a serious glare, as the staring did not let up, "It was a potential threat."
"Yeah, just call me when you shoot Bambi, Capsicle," Tony quipped, rolling his eyes, "You'll have saved the country."
As Tony and Loki walked ahead in search of their target, Thor approached Steve, putting a hand on his shoulder and squeezing it amiably. "I find your fear of the unknown perfectly reasonable, good Captain," he said, eyebrows lifting earnestly, "I myself, the god of thunder, feel some unusual form of unease in this forest. Like the time I found Loki watching instructional horseback riding videos in his chambers. That was most perturbing."
Steve made a face. "Uh, too much information, Thor. But thanks." Thor nodded, slapping him (a little hard) on the shoulder again before dropping his hand. Thor went on to talk about his adventures on Asgard as they walked, his booming voice echoing through the droning marshes of the woods.
Suddenly, as Steve was politely listening, he felt the same cold, clammy hands wrap around his neck. He tried to scream, but his mouth was covered as he was dragged off the path briskly and into the forest.
"And then, with a mighty cry, we -" Thor grinned, turning to his companion. But he found no one beside him.
"Captain?" he called, and Tony and Loki turned around. Tony frowned in incredulity. "Wha- where'd he go?!" Thor looked around, mouth ajar. "I... I do not know. One moment, I was talking with him right beside me, then-" "Then you let them take him in your arrogance and stupidity," Loki hissed. Thor looked down guiltily, and Tony sighed. "Look, let's just... we have to find him. No matter how much I tease the guy, I can't handle losing him, too."
Loki sighed in exasperation, and Thor nodded firmly. "I have done a great disservice to our initiative and our friendship, and for that, I am eternally -" "Oh shut up, you wallowing oaf, or he'll be dead before you finish his funeral speech here!" Thor frowned, and they started walking off the path to find Steve.
Meanwhile, back in the camper, Clint and Natasha were huddling under a blanket, close to each other for warmth. Darkness surrounded them, their faces illuminated only from the light of the moon cascading through the roof window.
"Tasha," Clint said. "Yes, Clint?" "Well…. everyone's gone… and, um….I think you look really good when you're scared…. and… so…" Natasha raised an eyebrow at him. "Are you seriously suggesting-" "Yes." Natasha looked at him, and suddenly grinned.
They pressed their lips together, breathing heavily as Clint's eager hands found the back of Natasha's head, grasping her red curls between his fingers. "I've wanted to do this forever," Clint said excitedly, and Natasha smirked. "I know."
He laid her down against the seat, deepening the kiss, and Natasha tugged on his hair. "Clint…" she whispered, and he smiled against her lips.
Suddenly, there was a loud bang above the camper, and Clint sat up quickly, slamming his head into the roof of the van. "Oww!" he whined, and Natasha sat up, her breathing steadying out. "Oh my god! That sounded like something pounding on the roof!" Clint looked around, and hearing nothing, shrugged. "Maybe it was nothing." "It didn't sound like nothing," Natasha said insistently as she sat up, wrapping the blanket back around them.
They sat for another second, then she shrugged as well, leading Clint back to her lips.
BANG
"Ahhh!" Clint screamed, and Natasha frowned up at him. "Okay, that wasn't nothing." Clint bit his lip, and sat up again, huffing. "What should we do?" "I don't know. We can't get out… whatever it is, it'll find us if we do." "Do you really think it's something…supernatural, though? I mean, other than the gods and their penpals, what have we ever faced other than undercover freaks or just regular old psychos?"
Natasha looked at him. "That's what you think it is? What about Tony's voices?" Clint was about to answer, when suddenly, all the doors in the van locked.
"Did you do that?" she tried faintly, and Clint shook his head, apprehension rising in him. Suddenly, Natasha screamed as a strand of her hair lifted above her head, and then, her neck was jerked back against the seat as Clint watched in horror.
"Tasha?" Clint asked, his voice wavering, and looked to see her eyes wide open, and her neck broken.
"Tash-Tash-Tasha!" he yelled, trying to get the doors open. The van began to shake, and after many tries, the doors unlocked, much to Clint's surprise. He scrambled out, and tried to run into the forest. "Guys?! GUYS!" he shouted, but hearing no answer, retreated to the van.
He walked in front of the camper, looking down the road, but each way looked just as dark and unpromising as the other. He started to panic, realizing that his partner, his Natasha… was dead because of this thing.
But he didn't have much longer to think, as the van's headlights turned on by themselves miraculously, and even though the actual motor was dead, it roared to life. Clint cried out, and tried to run, but was tripped by something. He watched as the van drove at him, and shielded himself with an arm as it ran him over.
Back in the woods, Tony and Thor were calling out Steve's name. "STEVE?!" the billionaire called. "I HAVE FAILED YOU!" Thor wailed, and Tony finally turned to him. "Look, it wasn't your fault, Point Break, he was snatched! Stop beating yourself up!"
Just then, they all heard a low whimper coming from the trees. "Steve?" Tony tried, and they all went deeper in.
As they did this, Steve was trying to warn them from not following the sound from the opposite side of the forest, but that same cold, clammy hand was kept over his mouth so he couldn't make a sound. The three followed the sound deeper and deeper, until Steve was sure they were going to fall for the trap, so he struggled free, crying out their names.
They whipped around, and followed the sound of their friend's voice. Furious that they had been diverted from their trap, the captor behind Steve saw to it that his friends would not save him. Steve felt a sharp, agonizing pain deep within his back, and fell to the leaf-covered ground, sputtering.
"Where are you?" Tony called, and Thor pushed prickly branches out of the way, searching relentlessly. "If you can hear us Steve, make the sound again!"
Loki walked another way, using his innate skills of direction, and gulped nervously, looking down in solemn sympathy. "Everyone… I have found Rogers." The two turned, and saw Steve lying on the ground, blood trickling from his mouth and a red splotch, growing larger and larger every second, in the middle of his back.
Tony knelt down, shaking his head. "This can't be happening…" Loki knelt as well, checking the wound. "No signs of knife or dagger marks… this evidence would certainly lend itself to your questionable idea of supernatural interference," he said, frowning thoughtfully. They turned to find Thor crying, (literally, bawling) about Steve.
The blonde god suddenly looked up, lust for revenge clouding his eyes. "We will avenge the deaths of our valued comrades," he said, expression cold and determined. Tony nodded drearily, and they sat for a second, contemplating how they would ever find whatever did this.