The scene with Megan was completely unplanned, I hope it fits in okay. Also, tomorrow's update is going to be a bit late so I'll post this now. I'm still working through general review replies but have done my best to answer specific questions. teddybear3, all I got in that review out of your email was your name. I'll spread it out in the author's notes or put something on my profile for you when I get a chance :)
Part II - Nikki
i.
Nikki doesn't think her emotions have ever been so out of control.
There isn't a word, and she knows because she's been trying to figure it out for six weeks, for the sheer frustration of knowing and still not being able to do anything.
Futile sticks in her mind as what might be the closest to it, because they fight against futility every single day and it's gotten to the point where there isn't a person in the building that isn't feeling the strain.
There isn't anything else they can do except keep raiding and trying to get more information from the men they have in custody. The woman she'd replaced in the team, Megan Reeves, had flown in from back East and watching her effortlessly slip back into the fold within minutes of arriving had been hard.
She can't help but be grateful though, because after the first day spent in the office, Megan removes herself to the Craftsman to take over keeping Alan and Charlie afloat. Liz had told her that they could concentrate more on themselves now, that Megan would have everything under control.
She feels like a despicable person when she's relieved at that because Alan's tired, knowing eyes and Charlie's up and down, manic and hollow seesawing are so draining.
She misses Ian especially in those moments and wishes that Don was back, protecting them all from themselves.
ii.
The days after the failed raid drag at the same time as they seem to pass in the blink of an eye. Aside from the dinner with David's grandmother and sister, she doesn't think they leave the office for longer than laundry and meal trips.
It is night thirty six and it might be dinnertime or it might not be, but she has a bag of groceries and is staring blankly at the handwritten recipe for spaghetti on the counter in the office kitchen anyway when someone clears their throat quietly. Whirling around, she comes face to face with Megan.
The taller woman apologises for startling her, moving forward hesitantly and Nikki says that it's okay even as her heart continues to pound. Megan asks whether she needs a hand and Nikki waves the recipe with a rueful twist of her mouth as she admits she's a terrible cook and that any help would be great.
They're both chopping onions with stinging eyes when Megan breaks the silence and thanks Nikki in a quiet voice for being there for the others. Startled, Nikki almost drops the onion and only just manages to avoid wiping her eyes with hands soaked in onion juice.
Her own voice is mostly incredulous when she says that if that's what it looks like, she feels like it's almost the complete opposite. It lowers and she has to concentrate on making sure it doesn't crack as she tells Megan that Don's been protecting her from herself since she started and that Ian, well, Ian's been her parachute if that makes any sense at all and she feels like every time they fail to bring them home she's just proving that she doesn't deserve the place she's somehow managed to be given.
Nikki's breath hitches for a moment and it isn't just the onion that's making her eyes sting anymore when the other woman carefully puts the onion down and rinses her hands before reaching for Nikki's. She worked with them for three years, she says, and there is nothing freely given, only earned and Nikki's place is hers because of her actions and her attitude and that her presence was as much a help to the others as anything she could do with her weapon or her mind.
It only takes a few moments for the sting to fade to a manageable level and her to be able to give Megan's hands a brief, light squeeze in return before she says that the onions aren't going to chop themselves and then, almost as an afterthought, that she's really glad she finally got to meet Megan.
iii.
She and Liz are in the war room, staring at pictures and boards and trying to figure out just what would be their next move when David's shout reaches their ears and the sound floods her body with more warmth and adrenaline than any cup of coffee or shot of whiskey she's ever had.
There is no memory of making it to his desk or reading the note or taking the stairs because waiting for the elevator was not even an option. Her mind kicks in again when they reach the carpark and she throws herself into the back seat, already settling the stack of Kevlar vests at her side as David hits the speaker speed dial for Colby who answers on the third ring and says that they're about an hour ahead of them.
The other agent doesn't mince words as he repeats the call from Gary Walker to them and that they have a location of a vehicle registered to an alias of what they think is an upper level man of Barinelli's that has rolled over on the way into a remote industrial district near a small town. Liz asks whether there are any signs that Don and Ian were involved and Colby's voice is like the crack of a gun when he says there were two pairs of handcuffs recovered from the wreck.
Words become a little superfluous after that.
iv.
They reach the crash sight and a local police officer offers to show them to where Billy and Colby had taken off along the trail. Questions have no place as they follow him past the rolled vehicle, past the covered corpse and forensics team and to a deep set of tyre tracks in the ground that disappear into the darkness.
Liz is the one that takes the flashlight and the lead and David brings up the rear and Nikki quakes with adrenaline as they take off at a run because there is no doubt that one way or another, this ends here and now.
v.
In the end, twenty three seconds is long enough for Nikki Betancourt to recognise the round face of the man being loaded into the ambulance when they catch up with the rearguard of the trackers, but it takes another fifty four for her to realise what that means.
Poor Nikki, she's about ready to tell the FBI and all the associated angst where to go and it won't be pretty. Barinelli would make a great live-action target to vent some frustrations if Billy doesn't get to him first. I kind of liked her scene with Megan, there's something kind of fitting about both of them trying to make spaghetti in the break room – Megan because she's trying to make up for an imagined desertion when she left and Nikki because she's part of the pack but doesn't feel like she deserves Megan's place. Charlie's next. Also, Ms. GrahamCracker raised another really good point last chapter about whether Don would worry about personal hygiene if the tables were turned: (I can answer this quicker I hope) there is a world of difference between fast paced cases and ones like these - it's been thirty seven days, and they know for sure that they were alive seven days ago, so it isn't just fear of losing them, it's fear of what they're enduring in the interim. That'd burn them out pretty quickly for one, and there literally isn't anything they can do except what they've been doing which is essentially responding to events out of their control. I think there definitely have to be moments where they need to step away for their own sake as well as Don and Ian's, like Wright telling them to get the hell out of the office for a few hours. David's better at taking orders and seeing the bigger picture than Don, I think, so while there isn't any less desperation and drive, thirty seven hours is a period that you COULD push it to the max the whole time. Thirty seven days isn't and the team knows that.