Chpater 2: Unforgiving

Speaking: Leonardo

We laid Master Splinter's body to rest in the park three days later.

We all stood around his grave in silence, a wooden plank sticking out of the ground with his name carefully carved into it, and his cane propped gently next to it, wearing our black coats and hats, hoping, praying, that somehow we could hear his voice one last time. On that day, it was only myself and Avolla, Don and Anocari, and Mikey at his graveside..Raph was still unconscious from his own infection, and resting at the lair. I was afraid of what might happen when he did wake up, knowing that he was fully unaware that Splinter was even gone..

Don, Anocari, and Mikey walked slowly past me after saying their final goodbyes, Don stopping to put a hand on my shoulder, "Leo..don't stay too late, alright?"

I looked down, realizing that he knew me all too well. I could have stayed by his grave for hours, even days, if he had just kept walking.

Anocari turned towards me, letting go of Don's arm to face me. She put her hands on my arms, squeezing them gently, "You know..he will always be here, even when he's not." I nodded, trying to give her a little bit of a smile. Anocari had always been a good sister to me, somehow knowing exactly what to say and how to say it. She let out a short sigh and smiled weakly at me, extending her arms to hug me tightly, then turned to walk away with Don.

I looked at Avolla after everyone else was gone, seeing her stare at Splinter's grave just as mournfully as I had. I took her hand as she looked back at me, "Why don't you go back to the lair and get some rest.."

She stepped close to me, placing her head against my chest, "I can hear your heartbeat..it beats so slowly.."

I put my hands on her shoulders, "And what does my heartbeat have to do with anything?"

She smiled, "It's a good heartbeat. Gentle, kind, just as you are." She lifted her head to look me in the face, "Leo..this pain..no matter how much it hurts, it won't last forever. Remember to realize you aren't just a hard shell on the outside..no pun intended."

I smiled a little at her, proud that she could still make a joke in times like these, "I know..I know."

She kissed me on the cheek and squeezed my hand, "I love you. See you back at the lair."

Once she was out of sight, I took a seat on the yellowing grass around the grave. Looking around, everything was dying..just withering away..even the humans of Earth were dwindling in numbers. The super virus had been out for nearly two years now..and we did our best to stop it..but there was nothing we could do. We were so foolish..to think we could stop something like that..if only we had just stayed away..Raph wouldn't have contracted the virus.. God..how we acted like foolish children that day, thinking we could simply charge in and force Shredder to create a cure. All it did was cause the exact opposite..more infections..more deaths..

I sighed heavily, reaching into the pocket of my black trench coat. Just before Splinter passed, he used what strength he had left to write a message, specifically to be read by me. He explained to me that he was worried about how Raph would take the fact that he was gone, and wanted me to make sure he would be alright.

I unfolded it slowly, afraid of how I would react to the words within it.

"Leonardo,

I expect that by now you have laid me to rest in the park, just as I requested. I know it is hard for you to read this letter I have written, but you must heed my words, my son. Your brother is not light of heart. You need to understand that he will be difficult upon his waking hours, and that you are the only one who can properly contain his emotions. It will, and I stress, will be difficult to do what I am about to ask of you, but it is the only way to make sure there is no further pain in our family. Do not lie to Raphael about the cause of my death. You must tell him the truth. He will not take it lightly, and will grow weary from the truth, but he will heal in time. Bring him to my grave when you tell him and let him mourn properly.

Enclosed in a small wooden box placed upon the table in my room, I have left another letter for Raphael. He will be unsettled for not being able to say his goodbyes to me, so I hope this letter will comfort his heart. Please give it to him when you bring him to my grave. He will not run once he reads my words.

To conclude this letter, I want you to realize that you will always be my son, even if I am not there to be your father anymore. Cherish your time alive, just as I did raising you and your brothers..fathering the four of you, seeing you grow, learn, fall in love, it was all I needed in my life. Nothing has made me more proud than seeing how far all of my strong sons have gotten in life. I love all of you, and hope that you will only grow stronger to live rich, full lives, fathering your own children and watching them grow as I have watched you.

I will always be with you, my son.

Your Father

Hamato Splinter

I folded the letter with tears in my eyes, quickly shoving it back into my pocket. How could he ask such a thing of me? He knew just as well as I did how Raph would react if he knew he... if he knew he was the reason he had to die..He would go insane, crazy! There was no way I could ever help him if he was in that state..

I lowered my head as I stood back up, clenching my fists tightly, "I'm sorry Master..but I must disobey you this time.."

I felt such anger, such hate building up inside as I turned to head back to the lair. I was furious at Shredder..furious that he was the reason Raph was infected..the reason Splinter had to save him and contract the virus. It was all his fault..every bit of it, and I couldn't help thinking he knew it would end like this. He knew we would come after him, targeting him for spreading the sickness..so he took advantage of us, taking out our master to make us even weaker. I wanted revenge..I wanted vengeance.. So many times we thought it was the end with him, but this time he had crossed the line. I was finished with his 'games'..I wanted him dead..

Suddenly, a wave of anger flooded over me, and I started to run. I ran, unable to feel my legs beneath me as the adrenaline took over my body, the length of my black coat waving behind me in the wind. I knew in that moment I would go to Shredder. I would face him alone, and this time, I would put him to rest for good, even if it meant putting my own life to rest. At least..then I'd be with my master again.

I yelled angrily as sweat began to run down the sides of my face, overwhelmed with the feeling inside of me, "Shredder! Shredder, you will pay! I will never, NEVER, forgive you for this! I'll never forgive you for killing my father!"