Mischief mage: Hiya! Here's the next chapter.

Kyouya decided to make a list of facts that he could take from his current position. Making lists about things like this made people like him feel better.

Number one: his chest hurt

Number two: He was lying face down on the ground

Number three: his glasses were being pushed uncomfortably into the bridge of his nose.

Number four: The last people he had seen were the twins.

Number five: They had head off with the purpose of having a shower before class

Number six: he had NO idea where anyone else was

Kyouya felt better already. His life was now reorganised and stapled back into place. Excellent.

But there was one corner of the story still flapping in the wind; what had happened?

He sat up, his head was spinning sickeningly, but it didn't stop him from thinking clearly.

The cameras.

As club mum, Kyouya had taken the initiative to install hidden cameras at numerous vantage points in the room so that his people could evaluate the performance of the Host Club members (not that any of the knew about it). This way, he could tighten the budget and remove any unnecessary frills. All those costumes really did cost a lot.

Dragging himself up onto one of the couches, Kyouya flipped open his laptop. It had feeds from every camera.

As it booted up, he crossed his arms, with slightly more difficulty than normal.

"Welcome Master Ootori" scrolled across the laptop screen.

Camera feed. Click. Central chandelier camera. Click. Footage from the sixteenth, 4:00pm. Click.

Kyouya let it play, leaning forward over screen, chin resting on clasped hands. Before him, was a bird's eye view of the central circle of chairs which the host club occupied when not busy with customers. As was the case yesterday; they had been organising an upcoming festival.

There, the twins were coaxing Haruhi into making that commoner drink. What was it called again? Hescafe or something. Not really his kind of thing. She'd set out the cups, spooned the instant coffee into each mug, gone off to get the kettle, come back, poured hot water in and been enveloped by an impenetrable black smoke.

Frowning, Kyouya rewound the feed and played it again.

There.

Just as Haruhi had disappeared from the screen to fetch the hot water, Tamaki had slipped a small pellet into one of the cups. It had been accompanied by an expansive hand gesture which would explain by Kyouya hadn't noticed. Everything about Tamaki's personality was expansive.

That fool.

Kyouya knew exactly what that brown pellet was. That idiot must have stolen it from Nekozawa and that was why-

'AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH'

He straightened up to see two towel-clad twins burst in through the double doors, sopping wet and steaming.

'KYOUYA!' they both screamed shrilly, pointing at eachother.

'HIKARU/KAORU'S GROWN-'

They both gulped, afraid to mouth the words, pulling their towels further up their chests which had developed contours.

Kyouya sighed.

'breasts?'

The twin girls looked at their club mother in awe.

'But how did you know?'

Kyouya grinned and stood side on so that the almost hysterical fresh(wo)men could see.

'So did I.'

The twins stared unabashedly.

'You have your lord to blame for that.'

The dripping pair looked over her shoulder as she replayed the camera feed on slow motion.

'What is it?' HIkaru whispered.

'It's that pellet that Nekozawa showed us two days ago'

'You mean, the one that-' the twins began in unison.

'Yes, that one. I should have kept a closer eye on Tamaki.' Kyouya lent back on the couch with a mildly bored expression, 'There was no way that he, or should I say, she could resist an opportunity like that'

The twins were shaking now. Hardly surprising really. Their visible organ count had gone down by one and up by two in the space of twenty four hours.

'That, fool' they hissed.

'Where is he' they continued, fists clenched, 'He's overdue for some misery'

'"She" is in the sick bay'

Kyouya answered and corrected calmly, her cell phone flipped open in her hand. There was a text message written in capital letters punctuated by numerous exclamation marks. A typically Tamaki text.

'Haruhi fainted on the soccer field' she said in explanation to their inquisitive looks.

It was like another explosion. In a flurry of towels, the twins were gone and half-way down the corridor on the way to the sick bay before their droplets of water had hit the ground.

Not that they would listen if they could hear her. But someone had to say it. So she called out half-heartedly as their footsteps disappeared down the corridor:

'Put some clothes on'