[Chapter 2 Older But Not Yet Wiser.]

15 years later.

"Kili, lad." Dis shakes my shoulder, her voice breaking through my subconscious, breaking up the dream I can only hope was real. "It's time to get up, I need you to go to the market."

I do not want to move out from under the blankets. It snowed again last night and the temperature has dropped another twenty degrees. It's freezing out and I do not have the energy to move. Ma shakes me again before leaving the room, the door shutting quietly behind her. I sigh quietly, forcing myself to sit up, the blankets fall from my body onto the floor. I dress quickly, pulling my boots on at the door before joining my mother in the kitchen.

Dis hasn't been the same since Fili left - she seems lost. Ma is always looking for someone who isn't coming back. I try to tell her this but she doesn't want to hear it. She still thinks uncle Thorin is going to bring him back and everything will be forgiven. I know better. Thorin never truly had hold on my brother. If he wanted to come home he would already be here.

We sit together at the table eating breakfast but neither of us know what to say. I do not have the words to offer comfort to her and she has no idea what to say in return. This is how most of our meals are carried out. Ma spoons her porridge around the bowl, sighing quietly to herself. "What are your plans for today?" she asks.

She already knows what I plan to do today. It's the same as everyday. I shrug and look down at the uneaten food in my bowl. "Might go and shoot a little after I go to the market. Dwalin is supposed to show me a new move but I don't think he has time for it," I answer, pushing the bowl away. I help Ma put the dishes away before slinging on a fur coat. "I'll be back for dinner," I call out before leaving.

Our village isn't small but it isn't large enough to hold the things people around here were used to. All we have room for are the basics: food, medicine, water, clothing, and Bombur's toy shop. Ever since I was a kid I have loved to go into his shop and look around at the different crafted toys. Bombur's talent certainly hasn't lost its touch. I smile a little as I trace a the smooth surface of a warrior doll. I can remember a time when Fili and I would sit for hours acting out different wars in our bedroom. Now it seems like a life time away.

"Like what you see, lad?" Bombur smiles at me, placing a hand on my shoulder. "That's a new model. Just finished it this morning." He leaves me to tend to another family that has made their way into the shop.

"You have a great talent, Bombur," I say, smiling a little brighter. I eye the toy for a few minutes before walking away. "But I came in here to ask you something. Ma sent something with Bofur the other day and I can't seem to find him. Where's your brother gone off to?" I ask.

Bombur looks down at me, his large brown eyes shielded. "I can't tell you that lad - I don't even know where he is. I haven't spoken to him a few days." He hands me the toy the shelve and nods. "Take it, Kili. Heaven knows you could use a day for just yourself."

"Bombur I can't take this-"

He raises his hand and shakes his head, "Don't argue with me boy, just take it." He then smiles and shoos me out of the shop. I'm hit by the cold front as soon as I step outside. I duck my head deeper into my jacket and walk towards where Bofur said he was supposed to meet me. I have no idea what it was my mother has asked of him but knowing the two of them it can't be anything good.

Soon enough Bofur comes walking along. He looks freezing, all he has on is his signature hat and a thin fur coat. I begin to wonder if he was cold-blooded and that this weather couldn't affect him. "Kili my lad!" He smiles widely and takes me in his arms for a hug. I'm stunned for a moment but return the hug nonetheless. "How are you?" he asks.

"Alright. What have you got for Ma?" I tilt my head and watch as he pulls out a large envelope. He places it in my hands and ruffles my hair. "Make sure you get that to your mother right away, stop by Bombur's shop later. I have something to show you." I can only imagine what he has in store for me.

"Wait Bofur!" I call to him. He stops mid-step and turns to look at me. A smile is resting on his lips, his eyes are dancing with knowledge. "What's in the envelope?"

Bofur takes a pipe from under his jacket, lights it and places in the corner of his mouth, "Now, laddie, if it was meant for you, you would know." He waves and turns away, walking down the path towards Bombur's shop. I stand there, shocked. Bofur hasn't ever done that before. He has always told me everything I want to know.

He has been giving these envelopes to Ma for as long as I can remember. I never had the heart to look, afraid of the anger my mother would release on me if she ever found out. I flipped the envelope a couple of times and decided that I still didn't want to risk it. I slip it into my jacket and continue deeper into the market.

All I have left to pick up is a few medicines from Oin. As I walk over to his booth snow starts to fall again, tracing my already soaked body with water. Oin is seated behind a large wooden stand with Gloin beside him, the two chatting away about god knows what. My heart aches a little at the scene. It's at times like this I truly miss Fili.

"Oi, Kili!" Gloin smiles and picks me up in a rather tight hug. I smile the best I can and return the gesture. He sets me back down and turns back to his conversation with his brother. I wonder for a moment what the two are talking about but it's a mixture of words and signs and extremely difficult to follow.

Oin finally turned to me. "What do you want, laddie?" he asks.

I step closer to the pair, hiding from the blazing storm outside. "Ma sent me for a few things to stock up for the winter," I explain. "We are running out of the basics." Gloin translates quickly and Oin disappears behind the desk to collect the needs. Groups of dwraves were now gathering around the stands, whispering to themselves.

"Did you hear?"

"Apparently the young prince has finally returned."

"I wonder how Kili will feel."

The young prince? They can't be talking about Fili. Thorin wouldn't have brought him back. Would he?

I wait impatiently for Oin to return and when he does I thank him and lay a few coins on the table. "See ya' lads later." I call out as I head down towards the shooting rang.

I haven't been here in ages. Things seem different now. This use to be the one place I could come and be myself but everything seems to be crushing me at the moment. If my brother has returned what do I do? I can't imagine just stepping back into the house and falling into his arms like the good old days. Things have changed. I have changed.

I drop the things from the market at the gate and push the large wooden door open. It squeaks and welcomes me with the beautiful backdrop of trees and wildlife. I smile a little and listen to the crunch of the snow as I walk towards where I had left the bow a few nights ago.

Targets line the training rang of all different sizes and colours. The bow and arrow had always been my choice of weapon but lately it seemed like nothing worked for me. I can't focus enough to hit anything. I thought too much of how Fili wanted teach me to shoot and how he was just as excited for me to learn as I was. I clench my fists and narrow my eyes, anger coursing through my body. Fili should have been standing here with me, correcting me on the proper stance and teasing me to no end. It isn't fair.

I pick up his bow from where I had dropped it earlier and clench the metal frame in my hand tightly. I was surprised it had snapped from the force I used to fling it across the field only days before. I sighed quietly, hoping to calm the rage in the pit of my stomach, and pull an arrow from the hostel on my back. I place it back in the string and pull it back. I wait for a moment, calming my heartbeat, before releasing it.

The arrow soars through the air and lands below the center, missing the mark by just a hair. I try it again and again only to come out with the same result.

I curse a colorful ray of words and throw the bow across the field, where it bounces off a tree and lands on the ground below. This was ridiculous. I have spent my entire life training, battling and breathing what it means to be a warrior, now I can't even shoot an arrow correctly because of a the damn rumors floating around. Fili was the cause of every hurt and misfire that comes my way. I slump back against a tree and glare at the arrows fitted into the targets, only half listening to the repetitive calls of the birds surrounding the shooting range.

The sun has completely set by the time I collect my bearings. I cannot find it within myself to get up and return home. I know by now dinner has long passed and that Ma will be worried but I can't move. I want to sink down into the snow and scream, beg the darkness to take me. A part of me hates my uncle for taking Fili from me. We were supposed to grow up together - look after one another - now all I can remember about him is the way his eyes light up any time we were together. I can't remember his voice or how tall he was. I can't even remember if he actually liked to sleep with me or if it was something Ma had suggested he do to comfort me. Regardless of my conflicting feelings for Thorin I wish he would just visit. I can't remember the last time they had come home.

I allow myself a few moments to remember the good times with my brother before snapping back into reality. It's harder than I thought to come back and when I do a hole is left where Fili once lived.

Sighing softly, I pull myself out of the snow, collect the now broken bow and sling it over my shoulder before making the the trek home. I almost forget to grab Ma's groceries but remember at the last second, making me even more late. Most of the dwarves have already turned in for the night and the remaining are making their way to the village pub. I stop for a minute, debating if I should go in and get a pint. In the end I think better of it and continue on my way. If Ma is already upset, I don't need to make things worse by smelling like booze.

The walk home doesn't take to long but by the time I arrive on our front step my feet are frozen. I am about to open the door when I'm stopped by a deep voice on the other side.

"Is he generally late for dinner?"

Uncle Thorin? My heart drops to the pit of my stomach and my eyes widen in shock. It can't be - my uncle hasn't been home in fifteen years. He can't really be here. My hand trembles as I grab a hold of the door knob.

"Not usually," Ma answers, her spirit has returned. "He said he was going to go shoot."

Thorin speaks again, his voice strained. "Maybe you should remind him more often of the rules of the house, sister." Despite being on the other side of the wood, I flinch. He sounds so angry and disappointed.

"I have never had the need to remind him, brother."

Not wanting to hear what kind of response my uncle might have, I open the door and step inside. Almost instantly I am hit by the warmth of the house and the chill that's been haunting my body the entire day seems to slip away. Ma is standing in front of me only seconds after I enter, her blue eyes worried and filled with relief. "Kili, you're freezing!" she gasps, helping me out of the soaked furs. "What happened, lad?"

"I fell down a hill while walking." Not a complete lie, there is a hill in the shooting range. "There was more snow then I thought."

She shakes her head and ushers me towards my bedroom, her hands trembling. Why does she seem so scared? Ma has never been afraid of Thorin; she has always talked about him with a smile and a proud gleam in her eye. Does she know something I do not? "Be quick and get changed, dinner is ready." She shuts the door behind her and I'm left with the darkness of my room. Ma must have lit the fire earlier because there is warmth surrounding me the moment I slip out of my water logged clothing into a fresh pair.

I clip my hair back to keep it out of my face and walk out to meet my mother and uncle in the kitchen. I can hear them talking but not what they're discussing. The moment I'm in earshot they both stop talking. I now know why. I freeze and stare over at the other person seated at the table. I have the feeling I'm supposed to know them, like they were someone important in my life but for the life of me I can't figure it out. I'm slow to join my family at the table. Ma went all out for dinner - lamb and pork with a rang of vegetables and a sweet gravy. The only time our meal was this grand was the day Fili left.

Since then our dinners were small and quickly put together. Neither of us felt like being somewhere that reminded us of him for too long.

I stare at the table, slowly putting the pieces together. If uncle is here then that means...without meaning to, I look up the same moment the stranger does and for a split second my heart stops beating. Seated only a few feet in front of me is my brother.

missrainy; Thank you so much for your review! It means a lot. Don't worry you haven't insulted me, in fact your criticism has helped a great deal! Haha, I actually don't know that much German, I have a friend I chat with regularly who speaks German and she's teaching me a few words. I want to be able to talk to her. I hope this chapter is what you were looking forward to! Thank you again.

silvermoongirl10: Thank you so much for your review! I hope this chapter is what you were expecting.