I don't own Naruto. If I did…well, then I would know where Kishimoto is going with it. Thanks to all the people who gave input from TFF, and here for your reading pleasure is the first real chapter of Hivemind.

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Chapter One- An Interesting Pair

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The relationship between the Aburame and Uzumaki Naruto is said to have begun with a mission. After Uchiha Sasuke's departure, Naruto was ordered to go along with Aburame Shino's team to find a legendary insect known as the Bikochu. This was the first time Shino had ever been around Naruto without his teammates present, and the Aburame took the opportunity to learn more about his erstwhile partner. Shino thought he had learned all there was to know about the academy dead-last, but when Hinata was in danger, Naruto refused to give her up, even if that meant being able to find Sasuke.

Upon their return, Shino promptly went to the Aburame elders. He then announced, to their surprise and shock, his intention to befriend Naruto. After this astonishing declaration, he was leaving the council chamber when his father called out to him:

"Shino, wait."

Shino stopped, though he did not turn around.

One of the oldest members of the clan, Aburame Hachi, put forth the question all in the room were burning to ask, though their expressions might appear impassive to outsiders.

"Why?"

There was a moment of silence as Shino contemplated the question. Turning around, he replied simply:

"For an outsider, he acts like one of the hive."

Again, Shino's words caused a stir in the chambers. Not only was it unprecedented for the clan to befriend outsiders, but the demon brat? Perhaps they had been wrong about him all along. This would require more research. Some of the clan council, however, were less than surprised. Shino's father had been pushing for the elders to change their position on the Uzumaki boy for years now, and he rejoiced inwardly that it would be his son who started the change.

After much discussion, the Aburame moved to study the boy further, to have multiple people trail him and report his actions and reactions. What they discovered when they began to look closely into Naruto's life surprised them.

Though Naruto was not exactly hated, there were those in the village who took a more active stance in their dislike of him. The Aburame were not of the above group, but they had simply informed their children not to hang around the Jinchuuriki. Now, they were discovering the boy to be both joyful and more polite than his situation would warrant, not the malicious prankster the rumors had painted him as. Most places he went, he was overcharged for less than perfect goods.

At a clothing store where Naruto was looking for another one of his horrible orange jumpsuits, Shino 'accidentally' ran into Naruto on his father's request. After a few subtle hints, Shino gave up on getting through to Naruto, and bluntly asked Naruto if he could show him the products the Aburame made.

The Aburame section of the market was unique, a rather drab patch of grays and beige among the bright storefronts of the civilian shops. Inside, there were only a few customers, most of which were from the clan itself. Patrons from outside the clan were discouraged, though they would not be refused service if they wished to purchase something.

All of the clothing the Aburame made was painstakingly woven from hand-harvested silk, either from silkworms or spiders, and then specially treated to resist the weather and keep its wearer either cool or warm in any conditions. The normal silk clothing was of the fancier variety, and it was a sign of prestige in the village for the wealthier families to have clothing made by the Aburames, both because the person had 'dared' to enter the Aburames shop, and because the store's better clothing was rarely sold to outsiders for anything less than a small fortune.

The spidersilk clothing, on the other hand, could only be called simple by any measure of beauty. However, the truly discerning customers, usually ninja, purchased spidersilk if they had the money for it. Because of the weaving method the Aburame used, even the normal clothing made of their spidersilk was extremely tough; it couldn't stand up to a C-rank jutsu, but kunai were stopped without injury to the wearer beyond a large bruise.

Within the store at that moment, Mitarashi Anko was purchasing a new set of her trademark mesh suits; she had grown out of her old ones on account of a little too much dango, though she'd never admit that such a thing was possible. With these suits, they had to be just the right size or they wouldn't stay on. As she was pulling on one of her new ones and getting ready to leave the store, she was slightly surprised to see the orange-dressed loudmouth from Team 7 walk into the store, accompanied by Aburame Shino, of all people.

"Hmm…now this is interesting. I wonder what they're doing here together?"

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Anko swaggered over to Naruto, leaned over his shoulder and gave his ear a long, slow lick. Naruto yelped, jumped almost ten feet straight up and attached himself to the store's ceiling. After a few minutes of helpless laughing on Anko's part and grumbling from Naruto about "freaky examiner-ladies" and "sneaking up on people", Anko calmed down enough to ask the kid why he was even in here. Still grumpy about being surprised, Naruto only replied:

"Well, what are you doing here, freaky examiner-lady?"

Anko sighed inwardly. All that work trying to get the genins to remember her name, and this brat couldn't put in the effort of learning it?

"First off, brat, my name's Mitarashi Anko. Second, I asked you first."

"Hmmph. My name's Uzumaki Naruto, not brat. And I'm here cause Shino invited me."

"Really now? I didn't know you two were friends. Did he hit his head or something?"

After a bit more ranting from Naruto about how he could make friends without them having head injuries first, Anko tried to get a few words out of the silent Aburame boy about why the two of them were here together.

"So, Shino, isn't it? Why are you two here?"

"…I ran into him at a store, and heard him say he needed new clothes."

"That's it?"

"…"

Anko was a bit put off. These two were the ones she would have pegged as least likely to become friends, and yet here they were, standing in front of her. Also, though she had never seen the Aburame treating the blond brat badly, they seemed to pretty much ignore him. Something about this was fishy, and she intended to find out what.

"Oi, brat! After you finish shopping, why don't I take you two out for dango? Sort of as an apology for scaring you, hmm? How's that sound?"

"Sure, frea-'WHAM'…I mean, Anko-san. And you didn't scare me."

"Yeah, right. And I suppose you just jump to the ceiling randomly all the time?"

"Hmmph."

After Shino and Anko assisted Naruto with his selections, enduring complaints from the boy about the lack of orange in all the ninja clothing, Naruto came out of the dressing room wearing a mesh suit under a mottled green vest with a matching pair of shorts.

"I don't think I like this…it's too dark. And there's no orange!"

"Listen kid, this stuff is so much better than that jumpsuit of yours for sneaking and fighting it's not even funny. This is Aburame spiderweave, better than anything else you can get in Konoha."

"But…"

"No buts, I don't know what your jounin-sensei has been thinking, letting you run around in a neon orange jumpsuit this whole time. This is what I would have my students wear, if I had any."

"Hey, so does that mean I'm your student now?"

'WHACK'

"Oww! What was that for?"

"For being stupid, brat. I don't have any students, and I like it that way. Now go pay, the dango's waiting!"

Anko watched as the cashier rang up Naruto's purchases, and her suspicions grew as she caught a tiny nod from Shino in Naruto's direction, responded to with a matching nod from the Aburame manning the register. She was wondering if this was some sort of cruel prank on Naruto, and was about to interfere, when she realized that the cashier had charged Naruto about the same amount she paid per suit. So, if it wasn't a prank…then what was it? Shrugging it off as none of her business, Anko yelled for Naruto to hurry up if he wanted any food.

Anko strode off towards her favorite dango stand, the small group garnering strange looks from most of the citizenry. It wasn't every day you saw the Snake Sannin's old student with the Jinchuuriki, let alone with one of the Aburame's most promising young ninjas.

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When the odd trio arrived at the dango stand, Anko ordered five servings of her usual, three for her, and one each for the younger ninjas. Ignoring the dirty looks everyone was giving her and Naruto, as well as the confused ones Shino was receiving, she dug right in to her personal addiction. Shino lifted the skewer of dango carefully, examined it, and cautiously took a small bite. Though it was impossible to tell, behind his dark glasses his eyes lit up in appreciation. Naruto, on the other hand, looked at his skewer with suspicion.

"What is this supposed to be?"

Anko choked on her bite of dango, and after a few coughs, she managed to get out:

"What!? Don't tell me you've never eaten dango before? You have had a seriously deprived childhood."

"Hmmph. I eat plenty of ramen, how can I have had a deprived childhood?"

"Ramen? Ramen!? You're comparing ramen to the food of the gods?" Anko said heatedly.

Shino ignored the argument between his tablemates, focusing on the new dish in front of him. He had never tried dango before, but now he was regretting that he hadn't done so sooner. This was almost as good as his mother's cooking. As he nibbled away, he saw that the argument was drawing to a close.

"Fine then, brat. If you try the dango and don't like it, I'll teach you a jutsu. But if I try the ramen and don't love it, you'll owe me a favor. That all right with you?"

"Yeah, yeah…I still don't see why I have to owe you a favor! That's worth more than one measly jutsu…"

"Because, it's not like you can teach me anything right now. I'm thinking I'll cash it in when you get back from your trip with the Toad Hermit."

"Hey, hey, you haven't won yet!" Naruto took a huge bite out of the dango, and chewed it thoughtfully, his expression steadily growing grumpier as he finished the bite and swallowed.

"Well?"

"It's really good…"

"Hah! I win!"

"Not yet you haven't! I might have lost here, but there's no way you won't like the ramen at Ichiraku's!"

"Fine then, let's go! I want to settle this before it gets too late."

The two of them ran off towards Ichiraku's, Naruto leaving his dango behind on the plate. Slowly, quietly, Shino finished off his dango skewer, and reached across the table for Naruto's.

"…I wonder if my mother knows how to make this?"

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As the unlikely duo arrived at Ichiraku's, panting and arguing over who had arrived first and who would be paying, another figure watched from behind a nearby telephone pole. The Hyuuga Elders would later wish Hiashi had paid more attention to Hinata on this day in particular. As the shy girl watched Naruto's easy banter with the older woman, she came to the understandable conclusion that training from Anko would make her more confident, perhaps enough to talk to Naruto like Anko was.

Back in the Hyuuga manor, Hiashi raised his head from over paperwork. Something felt…wrong, somehow. A little voice in his head, channeling the spirit of all past Hyuuga Elders, screamed at him to check on his daughter. He almost felt worried, but then dismissed the feeling as unworthy of him. Hinata could take care of herself now; she had proved that in the battle with Neji.

Elsewhere in Konoha, Neji felt an odd urge to beat Naruto, and he unconsciously activated his Byakugan. Unfortunately for the Hyuuga prodigy, he was currently passing by the hot springs, the women's side to be precise. A group of women came out, clad in very little, and saw the young chuunin. As he flew into the air courtesy of a kick from the Godaime herself, and accompanied by screams of "Pervert!", Neji knew deep down that this was Naruto's fault somehow, and vowed to challenge him as soon as the injuries to his crotch recovered. Though perhaps…given the view he had gotten out of it, perhaps he didn't need to challenge Naruto at all. Yes, that sounded right.

In the nearby bushes, a certain white-haired super pervert winced, crossing his legs protectively. He had seen the look on Neji's face though, and vowed then and there to redeem at least one of the stuffy Hyuugas.

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Anko nodded thoughtfully as she chewed the ramen and listened to Naruto's spiel on why ramen was better than anything else. She had to admit, the ramen was pretty good. Not good enough to make her switch from dango, but tasty enough for her to want more.

"You lose, kid. I don't love it." Anko giggled inwardly. The silly kid had agreed to terms that would make it far too easy for her to win. It was like taking candy from a baby.

"Eeehh? That's not fair, Anko-san, there's no way you didn't like that!"

"Oh, sure I liked it, but I didn't love it. I said you would owe me a favor if I didn't love it, and I don't."

Naruto looked almost as if he was going to cry, his blue eyes tearing up slightly as he looked up into Anko's face.

"You didn't like the ramen?"

"Oh damn…" Anko thought to herself. "He can do the same puppy eyes trick that the Yondaime used to pull on people to get them to do his paperwork. Next he'll start the lip-trembling…ah, there it is. How am I supposed to be mean to that?"

Sighing to herself, Anko gave in. Just a little bit, though, it wouldn't do to ruin her reputation. Besides, knowing the people of this village, if someone heard she was being nice to the village pariah, there would be rumors flying around the next day about how she and the kid were plotting to destroy the village with some impractical plan.

"How about this, brat. I'll teach you a jutsu now, and when you come back from your trip, you teach me something. That way, we both win."

Naruto cheered up so fast on the mention of a new technique that it was like storm clouds suddenly vanishing from the sky, leaving his blue eyes clear and free of any moisture at all.

"Yatta! New jutsu, new jutsu! Hey, hey, Anko-san, what are you going to teach me?"

"Still a sucker for the Puppy Eyes, aren't you Anko," she thought to herself grumpily. "I still think that should be classified as at least an A-rank, but noooo! They refuse to even call it a jutsu."

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Fifteen minutes later, the two of them stood in Training Ground 44. Naruto was happily dancing around, singing his "New Jutsu" song, while Anko was looking more and more annoyed with her temporary student.

"Yay, we're here! So, Anko-sensei, what are you gonna teach me?"

Anko sighed. Being called 'sensei' made her feel old; that was part of the reason she had never wanted a genin team, even if one had been offered to her. Bringing her thoughts back to the present, she had finally decided on which technique to teach Naruto. Even if she couldn't have revenge on the village council, this would be the next best thing. Teaching something like this to a notorious prankster like Naruto was probably a bad idea in the long run, but hey, what did she care? It would be funny to watch.

Anko giggled to herself as she thought of the potential pranking uses this technique had.

"Hehe, this'll teach those old bats on the council to call me a snake slut. I can't wait to see what the brat does with this. Maybe I should even suggest some…preliminary targets? Yeah, that'll do it.

Clearing her throat, Anko began to speak.

"Ahem. I'm only going to say this once, so listen up. Got it?"

Naruto answered in the affirmative, seating himself on the ground like he was in school once more.

Anko laughed inwardly at his eagerness to learn, and continued with her explanation.

"This technique is called the Bunshin Bakuha. I've heard you can use Kage Bunshin, is that true?"

Naruto nodded mutely.

"Well then, you shouldn't have too much trouble using this jutsu. The basic principle is the same as behind the explosive tags; channel chakra into the clone a certain way, and you can have it detonate whenever you want. With me so far?"

Naruto, his face scrunched up in thought, nodded once again, though more slowly this time.

"Alright then, why don't you give it a shot? Just create a Kage Bunshin, but as you're making it, shove chakra into it like this."

Humming slightly, Anko pulled out a blank explosive note and pushed a little chakra into it to demonstrate.

"Okay, Anko-sensei! Here I go!"

"Wait! You're supposed to try it on the blank notes first...Oh shi-"

The resulting explosion created a mushroom shaped cloud of smoke reaching hundreds of feet above the treetops. The Fire Daimyo would later accuse Konoha of creating new weapons without his permission.

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About two hours later

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Naruto heaved himself out of the river, panting and gasping for breath. Anko stood over him, her coat slightly singed from the earlier explosion, and a manic grin on her face.

"Now then, Na-ru-to-kuuun…" Anko cooed, her voice dripping with a honeyed tone, promising much pain for the one who didn't answer correctly. "What have you learned today?"

"That you don't give very good explanations?"

"Wrong answer, brat," Anko sang out. "Back down the river you go!"

Keeping true to her word, Anko threw Naruto down the small waterfall again.

"And if you try to get back up here any other way besides waterwalking, I'll throw you back down!"

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Another two hours later

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This time, Naruto simply flopped down onto the bank, too tired to even stand up any longer. Every time he had just decided to give up, Anko had thrown him back to the bottom of the waterfall. No matter what he tried to do, he couldn't escape from this suddenly even more insane woman.

"Now, let's try this again, shall we?" Anko asked sweetly. "What did you learn today?"

"Not to make you mad?"

Anko almost laughed at that. She'd been yelling her 'lesson' at him every time she had thrown him back in, and he still didn't get it?

"No, not that one. It's true, but not the answer I was looking for. Oh well, I guess you'll just have to go back in the river until you figure it out…"

Seeing Naruto's frantic headshaking, Anko stopped. With a grin on her face, she asked one more time.

"So then, what did you learn today?"

"Not to use the Bunshin Bakuha?"

Anko sighed. She knew the brat was smarter than this, there was no way he'd even be able to function normally if he acted like this all the time.

"Ah…close, but not quite. Why can't you use the Bunshin Bakuha anymore?"

"Because you told me not to?"

"You know, Naruto…this is starting to bore me. The reason I told you not to use the Bunshin Bakuha ever again, is because you fed that thing so much chakra that if I hadn't been there, you would have blown yourself up. With your own clone."

"Huh? Then why've you been chucking me over the waterfall over and over again?"

'Thwack'

Anko bopped Naruto on the head, albeit lighter than she had earlier.

"Idiot. You already know how water-walking improves your chakra control, right? Well, the reason that clone of yours exploded so suddenly like that, apart from you pumping it with enough chakra to make at least a dozen normal Kage Bunshin, is because your control still sucks. I've heard you improved since graduating the academy, but your power's grown since then too. That's why I made you walk up the waterfall. Well, plus it was fun."

Anko grinned cheekily, dodging backwards as Naruto made a rather pitiful attempt at hitting her. That would teach him for using the Puppy Eyes on her! Mitarashi Anko wins again!

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Finally exhausted, Naruto sat with a sigh of exasperation. "I still don't get why control is so important. I can already control my jutsus well enough, why does it matter if I can walk uphill on a waterfall?"

"Wow…you really don't get it, do you? Better chakra control means bettereverything, at least as far as ninjutsu and chakra techniques go. Didn't anyone already tell you this?" Anko was a bit concerned. Not for the kid, of course, but she had heard that Jiraiya had taught him a few things before the chuunin exam finals, and she knew he had to be better than this if one of the Sannin had taught him.

"Well, yeah…Ero-sennin told me something like that when I was learning the Rasengan, but now I can do it fine! See?" He demonstrated, forming the whirling orb of chakra and slamming it into a nearby tree.

"What the…that's the Yondaime's…how...he taught you that!?" Anko stuttered feebly, a gobsmacked expression appearing on her face. Composing herself quickly, however, Konoha's resident snake mistress gave Naruto an odd look. If he had enough control to do the Yondaime's legendary technique, how on earth did he manage to make that big an explosion with his earlier attempt at the Bunshin Bakuha? She knew he was supposed to have a lot of chakra, but…given the size of the explosion, that was just insane! One would have to have at least twenty times her own amount of chakra reserves to make that big an explosion without even knowing how to control the Bunshin. "This kid's gonna be freaking scary with ninjutsu once he learns some more techniques," Anko mumbled to herself, "he's got enough chakra to spam the lower level ones till the end of time. I don't think I'd be able to really teach him anything else…all my techniques are precision killing, and he's pretty much designed for taijutsu and wide-range ninjutsu, with that much chakra…"

Finally speaking aloud to Naruto, Anko gave him the bad news.

"Look, I'd like to teach you some more, just so I could see the looks on those old bastard's faces when they hear about it, but I just don't have enough chakra. You've got so much more than me that most of my techniques wouldn't even work for you; there's no way for you to get the necessary control to use that amount of chakra without years of practice. It's just too small an amount for you right now. But hey, make sure and practice control while you're on your training journey, and maybe when you get back I'll finish teaching you. But remember…"

"Yeah, yeah…don't use the Bunshin technique. But, hey, hey, what if I'm up against an army or something?"

'Well then, go wild. If there's an army trying to kill you, feel free to use it. You know, though, with an explosion that big, you might not even need to use it on them directly. Just blow it up in front of them of something, and laugh as they all run into the huge pit."

"Hey, that's a great idea! Thanks for the advice and the new jutsu, but I think I'm late for a meeting with obaa-chan! She said we had to have one last official meeting before I left, so I'd better hurry up and go." Naruto ran off, waving to Anko as he went; to her surprise she waved back. "Weird…hanging out with that brat was actually pretty fun. Heh…oh well, time to go get more of that dango. Hope he doesn't mind that I borrowed his money!" Giggling to herself, Anko dashed off to the dango stand, holding the oft-stolen Gama-chan in her hand.

About three streets away, Naruto felt like he was lighter than he was supposed to be somehow…

"Huh? Wait, Gama-chan is…Dammit, why does everyone who gives me training steal my money!"

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As Naruto ran off towards the Hokage tower, lamenting the loss of his Gama-chan, he was oblivious to the eyes fixed on him. Moving from lamppost to lamppost, a small, indigo-haired figure darted quickly into shadows, always keeping her beloved Naruto-kun in range.

However, today there was a new addition to the "Stalk Naruto" Club, as Hinata found out to her surprise. Rounding a corner, she ran straight into Shino, who also seemed to be keeping an eye on Naruto. Oddly enough, he was carrying a bag full of dango, which Hinata had never seen him eat before.

"Ano……Shino-kun…are you watching Naruto?"

Silence, save for the slow munching of dango, ensued as the two moved along, keeping pace with the orange-clad ninja.

"Are you watching Naruto, Hinata?"

Another silence fell, this one accompanied by a furious blush and finger-poking from the embarrassed Hyuuga. They were soon joined by their other teammate, who had been wandering the town with Akamaru. "Huh? Shino, Hinata, why are you two following Naruto?"

"Ano…stealth training?" Hinata offered feebly. Kiba thought about that for a bit. He, as well as almost everyone else in the Rookie Nine, knew that Hinata had a massive crush on the blond they were currently following. But what didn't make sense about all this was that Shino was following Naruto as well. Unless…

"Shino…you haven't decided to come out of the closet all of a sudden, have you? Because I don't think I want to be on a team with you anymore if that's it." Kiba began to back away from the bug-user slowly, keeping his hands on his rear and his front facing Shino.

"No, Kiba, I am not homosexual."

"Then you're really following Naruto for stealth training?" A sigh of relief escaped Kiba at that revelation. He had been scared for a minute there. Having to worry about your teammates' sexuality is not a pleasant thought. "Though maybe if it was Hinata, with Ino on the other side…No, no, no, bad thoughts! Get your mind out of the gutter, Kiba!"

As this little monologue was occurring in Kiba's mind, his two teammates were staring at him as his expression changed into interesting shapes and combinations, and he began to drool.

"Ano…Kiba-kun, are you all right?"

Kiba jumped as Hinata tapped him on the shoulder, yelping: "What?! Huh?! I'm fine, nothing wrong with me! Let's go!" He dashed off in pursuit of Naruto, Akamaru following close behind.

"Shino-kun…do you think there's something wrong with Kiba-kun? He seemed worried about something…"

Shino sighed. Dealing with naïve little Hinata was so…troublesome. He could see why Shikamaru liked the word so much. It fit pretty much every situation.

"Let's go, Hinata. We wouldn't want to lose track of Naruto."